Author Topic: Feeding every hour and sleeping on me  (Read 6080 times)

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Offline Fisher001

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Feeding every hour and sleeping on me
« on: February 21, 2017, 20:23:51 pm »
Hi - my LO is now 8 weeks and has a wonderful morning and evening routine but her daytime feeding and sleeping is all over the place. She feeds when she wakes up, has an hour of activity then feeds again before going for a nap. There is generally no set time as it varies so much. Her sleep is very short and broken if I put her in her crib as she often wakes up looking to be pacified by me. But if she sleeps on me or I take her out for a walk, she'll sleep for a full hour.

My other half is finding this very frustrating as he can't put her down for a nap and more recently she now won't take a bottle so he can't feed her.

Any advice on where I should start?

Offline *Ali*

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Re: Feeding every hour and sleeping on me
« Reply #1 on: February 22, 2017, 23:33:51 pm »
Here's a useful FAQ on getting started. Getting started - how I survived the first 3 months

It's really normal for a baby this age to need lots of help to sleep. There will be plenty of other things your DH can do for her like play when awake, change her nappy and dress her, give a bath etc. Maybe some of those things can be his job?
If you want her to take a bottle then I'd offer a bottle each day but not for too long if she isn't taking it. She will eventually I bet . Here's another faq Breastfed babies and bottles
Cadan Dec 2009 and Colby Aug 2011


Offline zissi

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Re: Feeding every hour and sleeping on me
« Reply #2 on: March 01, 2017, 21:20:59 pm »
a lot of babies that young want to be held and not put down. both of mine practically lived in the sling in the first few months of their life. have you tried a sling? or else enjoy some movies on the couch and let her sleep on you (unless you have other commitments but housework doesn't count, your husband could be taking on that role  ;)
Franziska

Offline Fisher001

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Re: Feeding every hour and sleeping on me
« Reply #3 on: March 06, 2017, 17:19:43 pm »
Thanks again for the advice and useful links. LO now feeds for under 30 mins when she wakes up, has 30 mins of activity then goes to sleep for an hour.  Sometimes with or without a mini moan. So she is on a two hour schedule and we've managed to eliminate the need to be soothed to sleep during the day. We still soothe to sleep at night when she's cluster feeding but that's okay, it's our time!

Still not taking a bottle, have tried three teats but were giving it a break for a week and will try again.
Has become too stressful. I don't agree with Tracey's suggestion of offering bottle and no breast until baby cracks! It seems really cruel.

One last question... where to from here. Is LO likely to extend her naps by herself or awake time? Do I extend her awake time?  Thanks
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Offline *Ali*

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Re: Feeding every hour and sleeping on me
« Reply #4 on: March 06, 2017, 23:15:17 pm »
No, that method of forcing the bottle is outdated now and we definitely do not recommend withholding the boob! We like to think Tracy would have updated her advice in this area had she still been around to do so.

Yes, her awake time will gradually increase and hopefully her naps too. By 12wks the average A time is 1hr20-30 minutes (including feeding). Keep an eye on her sleep cues and if she isn't tired at her usual time just wait 5-10 minutes and she probably will be.
« Last Edit: March 07, 2017, 22:59:11 pm by *Ali* »
Cadan Dec 2009 and Colby Aug 2011


Offline Fisher001

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Re: Feeding every hour and sleeping on me
« Reply #5 on: March 07, 2017, 10:28:31 am »
Super! Feels great once you get the hang of it. Am sure I'll be on here some more over the coming weeks/months but thanks again for the advice. You have no idea how this forum and support has improved my sanity!

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Offline *Ali*

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Re: Feeding every hour and sleeping on me
« Reply #6 on: March 07, 2017, 22:59:34 pm »
I felt the same when I joined 7yrs ago with my oldest!
Cadan Dec 2009 and Colby Aug 2011


Offline Fisher001

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Re: Feeding every hour and sleeping on me
« Reply #7 on: March 12, 2017, 19:35:37 pm »
Hi Ali
Another question. My LO is on a 2 hour loop throughout the day but when it comes to evening she refuses to nap from about 5pm and goes into a complete meltdown at about 7.30 after her bath when I try to put her to bed. Is it common for 11 week olds to stay awake for 2-3 hours at a time? Should I force the early evening nap. It's upsetting for everyone that she screams and screams each evening.
Thanks

Offline *Ali*

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Re: Feeding every hour and sleeping on me
« Reply #8 on: March 12, 2017, 21:39:34 pm »
It's really common for LOs to have restless hours before bed. It's called the witching hours.

Have you tried extending the awake times earlier in the day?

Do you have a baby carrier you could pop her in for those unsettied hours?
Cadan Dec 2009 and Colby Aug 2011


Offline Fisher001

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Re: Feeding every hour and sleeping on me
« Reply #9 on: March 12, 2017, 22:24:06 pm »
I didn't realise that witching hour could mean baby resisting sleep. Thought it was general fussiness.
I have a sling and took her for a walk in it at 5pm today to try force an afternoon nap as yesterday she was awake from 4.30 to 7.30pm!

It worked, she managed a 30 min nap. but she still stayed up from 5.30pm to 7.45pm and refused to feed or go to sleep.

I'll try extend her awake time by 10 to 15 mins in the mornings and see if that helps. Does that mean she'll be more tired in the afternoon/evening. She generally has an awake time of 1.15 hrs (10min feed / 50 min activity & 15 wind down for sleep) and 45 to 50 min sleep.




Offline *Ali*

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Re: Feeding every hour and sleeping on me
« Reply #10 on: March 13, 2017, 21:24:28 pm »
It will hopefully help to get her on a longer cycle and move the naps she does take later in the day. Ideally 3 naps and a cat nap will work.

Cadan Dec 2009 and Colby Aug 2011


Offline Fisher001

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Re: Feeding every hour and sleeping on me
« Reply #11 on: March 14, 2017, 19:31:29 pm »
Tried extending the awake time today, with varying levels of success.
I did manage to shh her to extend her morning nap but only by 15 mins. The second nap, she slept on me as she kept waking up. The good news is she moved her meltdown to 4pm instead of 7pm.

She feeds every two hours for 10 mins  - I've tried to extend between feeds but she just wakes up. I'm exclusive bf. I've tried to extend the time on. Ready but again, she won't take any more than 10 mins worth.

Below are two days routine... any advice most welcome.

Monday

4.00 feed

7.00 awake & feed (1hr)
8.05 sleep

8.50 awake & feed (1.20hr)
10.10 sleep

11.10 awake & feed (1.10hr)
12.20 sleep

12.50 awake (1.45hr)
14.35 sleep
14.50 awake & back to sleep

15.20 awake & feed
17.15 sleep

17.36 awake & feed
19.25 sleep


Tuesday

4.00 awake and feed

7.15 awake and feed
8.00 feed again
8.20 bed
8.45 asleep (helped sleep another 15 mins with shhh)

9.45 awake & feed
10.45 bed
10.50 sleep

11.35 awake & feed
12.35 bed
13.05 asleep
13.25 awake / pick up sleep on me

14.35 awake & feed
15.20 sleep

16.00 awake & feed
17.55 sleep
18.10 awake

7.00 asleep

11pm dream feed



Offline Fisher001

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Re: Feeding every hour and sleeping on me
« Reply #12 on: March 15, 2017, 10:12:45 am »
Also, how is it possible to extend awake time with keeping the feeding time 2 hours apart?

Offline *Ali*

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Re: Feeding every hour and sleeping on me
« Reply #13 on: March 15, 2017, 23:19:14 pm »
I think she's in a classic UT/OT cycle.  Her first two A times are so short that she doesn't take a long nap and can only manage a 45 minute single sleep cycles.  She just isn't tired enough when you try to resettle either.  Then because she isn't getting any restorative naps she gets overtired later in the day and takes 30 minute naps or needs help, like holding, to crash out  I'd try to stretch that first A time to at last 1hr20.

You won't be able to stretch A times and feed at the 2hr mark because she'll be asleep. At this age you can just feed on cue, ideally when she wakes.  If you think she is going to be hungry before she can take a good nap then you'd need to top her up before the nap.  If you want to encourage independent sleep you can try to feed a little before the nap and not feed to sleep.  It might be a main feed followed by a top up in each A time.  So it will be more like EAEAS. This is a common pattern for EBF babies
Cadan Dec 2009 and Colby Aug 2011


Offline Fisher001

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Re: Feeding every hour and sleeping on me
« Reply #14 on: March 19, 2017, 18:28:14 pm »
Have been extending the awake times to 1hr25 and feeding more often and the meltdown before daytime naps has stopped, thanks!! Nighttime we still have a bit of a meltdown but not every night, only when we've had a day out and her daytime routine has been stuffed up.

Naps are still 45 to 50 mins though.

😍