Hi there,
First time mama of a touchy/spirited 4.5 month old little girl here looking for some support, and assurance that it does get better.
Have started reading back into the posts on this touchy thread, and it has helped a lot. Having a really tough time reading her cues especially for sleep, and whether I read it right or not she only takes a 30-45 min nap, its just whether it takes a half hour to get her to sleep or 5 mins. She just recently (within the last 2 weeks) started drawing out her A times to 1.5-2 hours, which is great as she is more interactive, but because she does want/need a lot of face time, I feel stretched very thin when, after 2 hours she only sleeps for a half hour. We use the carrier toward the end of her A time to transition/calm down, and that seems to be working well (she HATED it with a passion until 3 weeks ago). I have been cautioned numerous times against white noise, and black out blinds. the general theme seems to be that they're a prop that will have to be used forever. Would REALLY like an opinion on this.
We also have reflux issues, which seemed to be under control by me cutting out dairy, caffeine and acids (citrus and tomatoes). That is until last week, when she started spitting up again very frequently, being more gassy, and uncomfortably fussy. This was also on the heels of her first two teeth coming through (yeah, there's been a lot going on). She has also developed eczema on her cheeks and legs...which leads me to thinking there is something else in my diet that might be causing that. The thought of cutting more out of my diet is frustrating as I feel so limited as it is. I talked to her Dr. and they aren't inclined to do allergy testing on a baby so young, especially one who is EBF. She has always done this gagging choking thing, which scares the crap out of me, especially when it happens in the car....dr chalked it up to excess drool because of teething, which I willing to accept, its just still so nerve wracking.
We have just recently needed to begin nursing in a darkened, quiet room. She is completely distracted, and won't eat completely if the tv is on, people are talking, etc. This makes going places difficult....does this change at all?
We have had our successes: We no longer need the swing to sleep, and she takes all of her naps in her crib. She is giving me 3 hours of sleep at night at a time in her co sleeper (would REALLY like to extend this, but all in good time) and she is often able to play independently for longer than 10 mins.
Things I have learned that might help other mothers:
Shh/pat does not work, at all. Too distracting
Low humming works well, an intermittent mmm hmm, or uh huh
We swaddled until 4 months for naps, and still half swaddle for nighttime. She started to roll over this last weekend, so we'll be watching her closely.
Oddly enough she does NOT like to co sleep. This must be her spirited side coming through.
Until recently, she didn't like to be held to sleep either. She wanted to be helped to sleep in her crib. Now, if I've missed a cue, or am trying to resettle her after a jolt, I can pick her up and lightly bounce. Basically, a modified pu/pd.
It is possible to desensitize a touchy baby to sounds, somewhat. I have spent many nap times helping her through (a heavy hand on chest and a hand on head, or pressure on shoulders) neighbor dogs barking (each different bark caused startling and waking), garbage truck (this one is still difficult for her, since its only once a week, but is getting better), the neighbor kid revving engines, and using air tools, the garage door opening (right under her room), me putting clothes away in her room, me talking while putting her down for a nap, car horns, etc. It seems that once a sound becomes familiar it no longer causes a jolt.
She sleeps with her head turned to one side, and I have to be sure to face her toward the wall. Even with no art on the walls, and very simple items in the room (crib, dresser, rocking chair, mirror, side table, ottoman) its almost like the room is too stimulating for her and facing her toward the wall helps with that.
I'm going to keep reading through the thread, and I'm sure I"ll find more things that resonate for us. Thanks for reading