Going out of the house and and naps

[Elphyrafire]

Looks like we may have beaten the 45 min monster and now I am wondering if I'm ever going to be able to go out of the house again. Do I go out when he's napping and hope he'll keep napping for 2 hours straight? Do I go out in his A time and hope he doesn't fall asleep. He likes to sleep in the car so do I time it to be his nap time or do I just forget about going out with him until he's 3 years old?
Ella

[debo620]

That's a good question----I have the same problem, we have a terrible time with the 45mintue naps. This morning I was able to extend my son's nap until his next feed, then awake time for 1hr 15min and planned to have him sleep in the stroller for his second nap. He slept smoothly in his stroller until the 45minute mark---awoke mad and crying, cried off and on for 40min, and then finally fell back to sleep as we were just about home. As you can imagine, I decided to keep on walking for another 30minutes. He did wake up when we got home but by then it was time to eat again.   I also feel that I will never be able to go out again. I think I have decided to try and stay home for the first nap, go out mid morning and fit in the nap-either in the stroller or in the car seat, and be home for 1pm for bf and third nap. my son is now 11 weeks so I figure that when he transitions to the 4hour easy----this mid morning nap will be the first to go.  and hopefully I will have my life back!
 How did you overcome the 45minute naps---what worked best for you? how old was your child when the 45min naps started and stopped?
 Deborah

[Mom to M&M]

MOST of the time I make sure we get home in time for DD's naps. AM nap is never really a problem but PM nap sometimes is. And my DH and I love to be outside on weekends - we live in NYC and are out and about a lot. So usually one day a week (at most) we have her afternoon nap in the stroller. She'll usually only sleep 30 or at most 40 minutes (partly because she's a side or tummy sleeper in crib and doesn't love sleeping on back in stroller) but we know that going in and accept it and either try for a catnap (which won't usually happen unless in car) or put DD to bed very early.

It does get easier when your LOs get older - for example, my DD is now a litle over 8 months and stays awake between 3-3.5 hours. If I want to be sure to get a long nap I just make sure to get home before we hit 2.5 or 2.75 hours so we can have some more floor exercise time and unwind for a good stroller nap.

[*Natasha*]

When i go out i usually do it around lunch time and after that as my DD prefers to have a big nap in the morning of 2hrs 10am-12pm sometimes even a bit longer if i let her. So if i know we are going out that day i make sure her morning nap is a big one and then she will have a short nap in the PM in her pram (around 40mins) and is usually ok until bedtime.

[Kate A]

Our problem was 30 minute naps.  If I got a 45 minute nap, I thought I had hit the jackpot!  For us, she overcame the short naps one weekend towards her 5 month b-day.  She took a 2 hour nap, mostly because we were traveling and she was tired.  That following month they were hit or miss.  Some days they were long and some days she snuck back in a 30 minute one.  She is now 7 months and I have to say we have finally hit the point where she naps a long time.

I had done everything imaginable.  I had taught her how to fall asleep by herself at 4 months.  To extend her naps, I spent a week or more going in when she woke after 30 minutes and holding her until she fell back asleep.  Most of the time it took 30 minutes to get her back down.  Then I would lay her down and she would sleep for 30 minutes longer.  It was so frustrating.  I feel your pain. 

My advice, looking back now (it was a whole 2 months ago), is that you do what you can, but roll with it.  If by the 6 or 7 month mark you don't see some improvement than the problem might be more than a nap issue. Maybe a routine issue, learning how to fall asleep independantly, eating, etc.  Someone told me time would change it when I was in your position and I didn't believe them.  I thought we would have 5-30 minute naps forever...but it did change.

[Elphyrafire]

Deborah-
I am by no means an expert on naps but since you asked-
DS started taking 45 min naps a few weeks after 3 months old and now he is 4.5 months old. His nightwakings went skyhigh around the same time. Until I read the book I didn't know my DS should be taking 2 hour naps- I thought- oh well, he's just switching to 45 minutes because he's getting older.

So what worked for us so far:
Wake-to- sleep method- For the first few naps I sat beside him so he couldn't see me but I could see him. I watched him and the second I saw him stirring- moving his head, wiggling his hands- I rubbed his forehead or patted his tummy and shushed him. MAKE sure they can't see you or it's game over! Like Tracy says, it usually happens around 25 mins into the nap. You really have to catch them before the moment when they are going to wake up. The first few naps were tricky and really boring for me to sit and stare at him.
What also may have helped:
switching to a 4 hour feeding schedule
a consistent wake time for the day and a consistent bedtime

But we are still struggling with night wakings.
good luck!
Ella

[debo620]

Thanks Ella,
We have been struggling with 45minute naps since my ds was 5weeks old---now he is 11 weeks. I think that I may have caused them to start b/c I discovered that by putting him down earlier he would fall asleep on his own----?maybe he wasn't tired enough so he just cat napped. I am not even that sure the short naps were a problem since his nights were going so well. They were really only a problem since I found it hard to work the EASY around them. I also didn't realize at the time that the windown and swaddling were so important.
Now I think he is just used to taking short naps. I am going to concentrate this week on the windown with him swaddled. I have had moderate success with pat-ssh back to sleep but it does not seem to be improving in terms of how long it takes. Also his nights have really only gotten worse. I was going to try wake to sleep today, I went in at the 30minute mark but he woke up both times before I even reached his crib----since i was already there he really didn't have a chance to fall back asleep on his own---it then took 40minutes to get him back to sleep---and by then it was pretty much time to eat. I have noticed this week that he has been able to stay awake longer--up to 1hour 1/2 before he is truely ready for bed--we are on a 3hour easy . Unfortunaelty this seems to be trial and error. Also they are building a house right next to his bedroom. There is no where else in the house that is even dark enough to lay him down. I am sure that as he is going througth the transition---the loud banging doesn't help!  I definately need to come up with a solid plan---either wake to sleep or see if he can do it on his own and patt-ssh if he cant.  I am finding it very difficult to know which option is best.

Deborah

[Elphyrafire]

Hi Deborah-
I know the frusteration well. What to do? Which method? Sometimes one works and other times another thing works and sometimes NOTHING works! Do i go with PU/PD or pat/shh or wake to sleep or CIO or screw it all and let him stay up and not nap?
Sometimes it feels like I have the only baby who can't sleep through the night (or take long naps without my assistance). I already feel like a parenting  failure and I'm not even out of the gate yet! My baby is only 5 months old and I feel like I'm gettig worse at this parenting thing rather than better.  No one I know personally has these problems (maybe they're all lying). Anyway, when I did get that nap extended to 2 hours I was literally jumping for joy! Good luck!!!
Ella
All that being said... have you tried white noise? Works wonders on putting my baby to sleep and sometimes back to sleep. We just use the static on my clock radio or disconnect one end of the baby monitor and turn the other half on kwim?

[debo620]

Ella,
yesterday I swaddled my son, walked around the house with him for 5min--and layed him in his crib awake. This smile came across his face---he turned his head to the left and fell asleep. Actually slept for almost 2hours!  :)I tried the same thing this morning.  He was very sleepy when I put him down----so I I thought I'd wait and see-----bamm 40minutes and awake. I used patt/ssh to get him back to sleep with him laying on his side. Unfortuantely at the second body jolt his little body started to turn forward almost to where he was on his stomach and he was in an awkward position---then he woke up.  I held him for a few minutes and he fell asleep on me---I put him down. Now I have to wake him up.   Although I am trying to extend his naps----I also want them to only be 1 1/2 hr--especially the am one b/c I think it is taking away from his night sleep. Since trying to extend his am nap---he has taken to waking up at 6:00am instead of 6:30am---of course this is a vicous cycle.  maybe i shoud of just left his 45min map in the am well enough alone!!!!

Anyway I am somewhat tired of patt-ssh. I am going to try staying in his room to see exactly what time he starts to awaken and then plan the wake-to sleep from there!
My ideal situation would of course be for him to awake at 7, eat, sleep from 8:30-to 10:00am. Instead, he now wakes up at 6am, bf at 6:30, asleep by 7:45, awake at 8:30---then back to sleep hopefullly. bf at 9:45 or so.