Daytime sleep vs night time sleep

[mmoats12]

Why are naps so hard?!?!

Ok…I posted on here last week, and the responses really helped me get through another week, so I'm hoping someone can help just calm my nerves again! lol

As I've read on here, it seem that a lot of people have a similar problem of struggling to get their young babies (under 4 months) to nap during the day for any length of time, or at all. I haven't been able to get my little one 11 weeks old to nap longer than 45 minutes in his crib for over a month now, and it is often a long struggle to get him to do that much. I have committed to one nap a day in the crib, and then I take him for a long walk in the stroller to get him a long nap (2-4 hours) almost every day. This has been purely a survival technique, as the days that I have decided to do every nap in the crib have been an absolute nightmare, and have resulted in a lot of tears, his and mine!

However, I am still struggling with the idea that I am causing the problem by consistently napping him in the stroller, and using the motion as a prop…and this is the reason why he can't seem to get through more than one cycle in his crib during the day? Thoughts?

My husband pointed out something today…that even though napping during the day has been hard, and I've been using AP everyday so I don't go crazy, it hasn't seemed to affect his night sleep at all or his ability to put himself to sleep at night. He has been consistently sleeping 12-13 hours at night with only one feed, sometimes going for 9-10 hour stretches at a time, and he often will wake in the night, but put himself back to sleep with no assistance from us.

So my question is…does it really matter where or how he sleeps during the day if it doesn't seem to affect his night time sleep?

[newkidontheblock]

It will in a while. We were in the same situation - STTN, going to sleep independently but so difficult to get down for naps. But days didn't seem to affect night, so however horrible the day was, I knew I would get a break at 7.

But as she has gotten older, day sleep is definitely affecting night sleep. Too little and we get OT wakings between BT and DF and WU is nearly an hour earlier. Same with too much -- EWs. She also picks up habits much more quickly.

4 months is hard. Naps at 4 months broke me. That sleep regression, wonder week was just very difficult for both of us.

Naps only improved for us at around 6 months. Before that, the first nap of the day was always the easiest and she slept well. After that it was a hit and a miss. At 4 months, we switched to 2 naps and a catnap and that made a difference. We accepted that the second nap was not going to improve and just stopped fighting it. So she did 1.5 first nap -- 40 min second -- 30/45 minute catnap. I would APOP the catnap in the sling or in my arms if needed - she never sleeps in the stroller.

Finally, at 5.5 months, when we moved to 2 naps, DH and I committed to staying in the room with her for the nap. So we would put her down and then go back in at 35 and lay a hand on her before she stirred. We found that she just slept through. Then we held back a bit and put a hand only if she cried out. And then we stopped going in altogether and she started sleeping through 70% of the time. I also decided that as long as she had done the first half of the nap in the crib, I would try to resettle in the crib but if it wasn't working, I would hold for the rest of the nap. Believe me, it was a weight off my shoulders. Shush/patting, PU/PD was so incredibly stressful and after all that when she still wouldn't sleep, it was so disheartening and frustrating. This way, she gets her rest and I am reinforcing our bond, and I can relax and close my eyes for a bit even. Sometimes I sit on the floor of her room and then gently lay her on a rug there.

It does get better. Or rather, when you only have to PD for 2 naps, it is less of a tension. On the other hand, not many chances to get a well rested baby when A times are long and there is only so much time in the day.

Anyway, what I mean is, if you feel that APOPing the naps is helping you, go for it. But remember, start as you mean to go. Otherwise in a few months, you will have to do a lot of extra work to break her out of the motion habit. If you feel that you can consistently continue with doing that nap in the pram, it should be ok. You can treat different naps differently.

Has anyone had a look at your routine? It is amazing how a few tweaks can help with naps

[mmoats12]

I have had someone look at my routine and they thought it was pretty on target. I have also played a lot with A times myself, and doesn't seem to make a difference.

I guess I should clarify my question…

Do you think his ability to self sooth at night is affected by what happens during the day? He doesn't have any problems being laid down sleepy but awake at bedtime, and putting himself to sleep with little or no shh-pat. And he wakes up at night sometimes, but will often go back to sleep on his own.

During the day, it is a much harder struggle most days to get him to nap in his crib, but I can always (with rare exceptions) get him to nap at least one short nap in his crib. But it takes a lot of effort and shh-pat to do it, and it is always short, 45minutes at the most. I have only been able to extend the morning nap in his crib a handful of times using shh-pat, usually I pick him up and hold him for the next 45 minutes as well.

So I can get him to sleep for naps…but can't get him to stay asleep for long naps. Is walking him in the stroller the reason why he can't seem to nap longer than 45 minutes? Or is this just developmental?

I feel like he is developing some self soothing techniques, he sucks on his bottom lip at night to sooth himself, and he has really good night sleep habits. So I know I'm doing something right! I guess I am just hoping that the nap thing will develop eventually.

But in the mean time, I find it way too hard and frustrating to nap him too many times during the day in the crib. If I do that, he only gets short naps, and gets progressively more tired as the day goes on, which as we all know, makes it even harder! And if he only does short naps, I have to put him down 5 times a day, which is just physically and mentally exhausting at this point. So that's why I've been using the stroller, to help him get a long nap, and also to get a break myself from bending over the crib. But I'm worried it may be contributing to the problem of his short naps? But ultimately, I don't' know what else to do? He doesn't sleep in a swing or chair, or a sling. Sometimes he will sleep in the car, but he is getting more resistant to that as well. So the stroller is pretty much my only option for a long nap at this point.

I'm rambling…just knowing other people struggle with short naps too helps!!!

[newkidontheblock]

I hear you. As I said, same situation in our house and it was mind boggling how beautifully she would go to sleep and stay asleep in the night but remain a nightmare napper. All I can say is, as time passes, they drop naps and it gets slightly better. It is easier to tolerate things for 2 naps than 5. I used to be so fed up