(((Hugs))), Kate. As hard as it is, I agree with Katherine.
IIWY, however, I would start with a two nap day (or even a couple), as my guess is that she's OT seeing as she was sleeping more on two naps (even though her night sleep was quite broken). Then, you can get a later BT and hopefully help her catch up a bit, so she might wake later. I don't know, this is what I did with my older two and it worked so well (up until about 18mo for G and almost 2yr for C, as she was an EWer when teething and never slept long naps). It doesn't seem to work quite as well with Charlie though, so it may not be something you want to try or do. It's just my first thought. Ultimately, though, I do think complete consistency and no feeds will be the ticket.