never ending battle it seems

[legend_018]

ok perhaps im just venting. just when my LO seems to be doing better for a week, the next week she takes a step backwards. She turned 1 on March 28th. I've been having problems with her eating off and on since 7 months of age. She is now on milk bottles. When I showed the Dr. a chart of what she's been eating...charted it for a week and it was a semi ok week, she said no wonder why she sometimes gets up early and/or in the middle of the night for a bottle. Folks in this forum have mentioned many times that her recent average of about 25 to 27 ounces is too much. Yesterday I tried real hard to cut down bottles. She was diagnosed with a MINOR ear infection last Wednesday so maybe it's not a good time to do that. this is what happened. She barely had 1 scrambled egg yesterday for breakfast. I managed to get her to skip her 2nd bottle of the day because she ate a whole 4 oz of the le creme yogurt. than she basically had no lunch and I blended some bannana in with her milk. Dr. suggested I try stuff like that since she is such a picky eater. It was originally 6 oz but it grew when I put the bananna in and she wouldn't drink it all. I than sat her down for supper twice and gave her a 4oz bottle in between. than at bed time, I tried to give her a 6 oz bottle, but almost an hour later she had 4 more. Believe me I know when she wants a bottle. Than she woke up at midnight and my rule if she wakes up before a certain time is she gets water. I tried that but than she wouldn't stop crying and I thought something was wrong...but turns out she was hungry. I HAD to give her 4 oz. All week she's been hardly eating or not enuf for her age. last nights dinner by the way was just a small amount of noodles and she might of picked on a FEW veggies. I just don't know how I'm going to cut down these bottles when she isn't eating like she should. Please remember even with the amoutn of milk she is on...she has what I would call GOOD eating days/weeks.

[andibig]

Mary
I had a thought about how you can cut out some of the btls.In one of tracys book she gives a method for making the btls as unattractive as pos.Its generally used for toddlers who are over 2yrs and still dependant on btls but i really think it would be worth a try.

***Make the btl less attractive.Cut a slit in the nipple, about 6-9mm across.Wait four days and then cut a slit the other way, so you'll have an X.After another week,cut first 2 and then all 4 of the triangles.Eventually, you'll have 1 big square opening and your child will lose interest altogether.****

Also instead of offering milk when she won't eat (teething etc) you can try things like smoothies which you can put loads of fruit in.

[MDHmommy]

Add tofu to that smoothie made with full fat yogurt and you've got yourself a meal! I know one of the women in our birth club had great luck with this with her DD.
Have you tried also a straw cup or sippy cup? I know when we were working on ditching the bottles, straw cups worked better for DS because he did not have to figure out how to tip it back. But then he didn't end up drinking near as much milk because it came out faster.
Just a thought.

[macsmum]

just a thought, but my ds went off his solids and i was pulling my hair out, till i gave him a spoon so he could start to feed himself whilst i actually fed him, everytime he opened his mouth to put his spoon in i got in 1st
he always has his own spoon now and he manages to get quite a bit in his mouth on his own

Emma

[legend_018]

Thanks for the advise. Last night she did have some mac and cheese. I don't know what is going on. Every 3 hours she is begging for a bottle. Today so far I have tried her scrambled eggs, some toast, pieces of an orange and yogurt. This was split between two sittings. She had a bottle at around 8am "6 oz".  She had some of the egg and a bite of the orange. That was it. AT around 10:45am.....I mixed milk with 1/2 bannana and some of her yogurt. She drank I believe 2 oz and didn't want anymore. Well between 11 and 11:30am...she was absolutely miserable. I kept putting the bottle I made up to her mouth and one time she tried to take a sip but didn't want it. Finally since she was miserable, I was miserable and it was past her nap time, I had to POUR it out, poor just regular milk into the bottle and she drank it down.   Believe me I tried. She was crying crying crying. I noticed her stools are soft. She has 3 days left of this medicine she is on for a minor ear infection. When she is off this medicine perhaps I'll try the slit idea. This is the 2nd attempt in the past 2 weeks with trying to make some kind of a shake. The last time....she sort of did the same thing...well actually she drank some of it, but was eating a little better that day, so she didn't beg for a real bottle. However, that was the day I tried to really cut down on bottles and it backfired on me when she wanted to drink a lot before bed and woke up twice in the middle of the night crying for bottles.

[legend_018]

I just posted, but forgot.....she makes a mess with straw cups. but, is good with her sippys as long as I hold it. She will only drink water from them. She tends to drink a decent amount of water every day. I do also let her hold spoons and folks.

[MDHmommy]

Is it possible that she's just thirsty when asking for a bottle? So like, when she wants one - you could just offer her water from a sippy and then go do something else to distract?

I'd hold off on doing much of anything until that ear infection has cleared - likely she's using the b for comfort and if she's in pain, then you don't want to take that away from her. Do be aware though that too much bottle can equal ear infections....

I almost wonder (with the nighttime feeds) if the bottle isn't a prop? A 13 month old drinking 4 ounces in the night is not a hungry 13 month old...if she were truly hungry, don't you think that she would eat more? Do you feel like you could be firm about no bottles during the night, and upping food intake during the day? I think that if she stopped drinking at night she might be more hungry during the day and the food intake would start to correct itself?

[legend_018]

I know so many factors and each situation is so unique. Many times she has gone thru the night without a bottle. Just recently she's started again. Or sometimes it's like 1/2 the week she gets up for one and the other 1/2 she doesn't. The night before last, I gave her water, but she only ended up crying for a bottle. I mean she reallly crying. That was after the day I really!!! tried cutting down bottles, but she never ate as good as she should. In the past, when she's been eating fairly normal....my moto was if I thought she had enuf to drink during the day, if she woke up before 3:30am, she got water. That actually has worked a few times. The other night it didnt' and last night she woke up twice. The first time, I gave her water - but the 2nd time about an hour and half later I gave her a bottle. I go downstairs and make the bottle and only offer her a small amount. I don't want her getting into the habit of drinking 6-8 oz bottles in the middle of the night as she has in the past. I had her on about 24-27 oz of milk a day. I know, I try to cut down but it's hard with her eating habits. Yesterday it was a total of 30 oz for the day. That is so discouraging. She just recently had a fairly good eating week too. It's just as soon as we take a step forward, she takes a step back.

[MDHmommy]

Is she underweight, or is there a medical reason why you need to be overly concerned with her eating?

The reason I ask is that I've seen lots of moms get a bit fixated on their toddler's food consumption constantly concerned that they're not eating enough, or not good eaters, and this can turn into a disaster later in toddlerhood...where you've got a 2 year old using food as a hot button with mom...and it's not fostering healthy eating habits later in life.

Do you know her cries well enough to know if she is crying because she is sad/upset, or if she is crying because she is mad about not getting her way? I had a REALLY hard time distinguishing those cries when my DS first started to throw fits when not getting his way (which for us happened around 12/13 mos), but if you listen and assess the situation you might find that she's really just throwing a tantrum for the bottle. And that's the point that you have to decide what you'll give in to and what you won't.

I TOTALLY understand that you're concerned about her not being a good eater, but unless there's a medical reason that your Doctor is concerned with her weight gain, I'd say decide when she can and can not have a bottle (i.e. she gets one before her bath, and all other beverages are delivered in X type of cup) and stick to it (regardless of crying) and also decide when she can and can't have food - like establish snack times to sub for a bottle time. For 4 days. You might want to think about the typical times that she cries for a bottle too, and then try to avert the bottle cry by offering a snack before she gets a chance to realize she's hungry/thirsty and wants a bottle. Above all, I'd say figure out a plan and stick to it for at least 4 days before you decide something's not working.

((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))

I know it's frustrating!

[legend_018]

I'm getting confused at what to do. My LO is either not eating or is very picky. I try very hard to sit her down and offer her foods many times a day. I try very hard at times to cut down on bottles. Because of this she is hungry and it almost seems she is constantly hungry. No more than 3 hours sometimes even 2 hours go by and she is literally crying for a bottle. At that point, trying food will NOT work. This is causing her to increase her milk intake and she's getting up in the middle of the night again. I just dont' know what to do. She has been sitting in her high chair for almost an hour now. She is watching tv. I made homemade waffles and she hardly took any bites. She whined a few times. I tried yogurt. Not too long ago, she would at least eat between 1 and 3 oz of yogurt in the morning. Today is her last day on the medicine...I hope that is it. She did have a bottle at 6am. I do try feeding her first in the morning and sometimes it works a little. Like for almost a week she would have maybe 2 oz of some cereal she was eating. This morning I gave her the bottle though. It's 8am and I'm guessing at around 9am, she'll be crying for a bottle and I'll have no choice because I really need her to take her nap today. I think this entire ordeal is even affecting her sleep. This isn't a case of her not being hungry for the most part. She's starving and she wants her bottles. Welp got to go take her down from her chair....she isn't eating. I'll have to do what I did yesterday and pour the yogurt into her bottle which she did drink. If I put any fruit in it, she won't drink it.

[legend_018]

i tried some more choices at around 745am
took a nibble or two of the apple pieces and bread. Mostly played with it and than whined to get down.
apple pieces, bread, tangerine pieces is what i offered. so 2 breakfast sittings.
than out of desperation, i sat on the floor and let her stand and made a mess getting maybe 1oz of cereal in her.
i let her hold the spoon and she took some bites by sort of feeding her self, but she gave up fast and didnt' want anymore.
than at 910am i coild not take the constant whining and crying
i gave her 4oz bottle of milk mixed w/yogurt which made it a good 6oz bottle and she gulped it down within minutes. and is now back to a normal mood. i gave her bottle at 6am and desparately tried to get her to eat off and on from like 7:15am until 9am. Ya she did pick a little here and there. She tends to want her bottles especially in the morning 3 hours apart so come 9am, FORGET IT!! she is going to cry cry cry until she gets her bottle. Why? because she's hungry. believe me she isn't eating good enuf to accomodate for not having bottles. The poor thing.

[katriona]

just wondering if you are attempting to reduce the bottles, and you know that there are danger points, like the 9am urge, can you plan to be out doing something fun at 9am? perhaps be in the car enroute somewhere, and have a little cup of snacks in front of her? is she ok at feeding herself little pieces?

[legend_018]

she woke at 5:30am and can't stay up much longer than 4 hours in the mornign especially when getting up early. She can eat most things on her own, as long as there safe to eat of course.

[MDHmommy]

Is it possible that she's getting teeth, or molars and the sucking feels good, and chewing hard food hurts?

[legend_018]

its possible she could be teething. getting her to fall asleep at night is difficult these days.
but I am giving her a lot of soft foods...like she usually always likes scrambled eggs and noodles.
At noon time "which is right now basically" I made some mac and cheese. she seems to be doing ok with this. She won't really let me feed her with teh fork, fed herself sort of a few times...mostly just wants to pick the macaroni off her tray which is fine. She at least looks like she wants to eat it "lol" and not just a nibble or two. I mean in the end, she still might not eat a LOT but at least it's something.