Author Topic: In a mess with EW, messy bedtimes....and a new baby!  (Read 954 times)

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Offline 4isstillnighttime

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In a mess with EW, messy bedtimes....and a new baby!
« on: June 22, 2015, 04:59:26 am »
Hi

I am in desperate need of some help. I have twins who will be 2 in July, and a 2 week old baby with tongue tie and reflux. And it gets worse!

The twins were doing reasonably well before the baby, but since he was born it has all gone horribly wrong! Prebaby EASY: awake at 5:30, nap for up to 2 hours (at home 1-3, at nursery 12:15-2:15 ish), bedtime 7:30. This was not perfect - would have preferred WU of 6 but we get up around 5:30 anyway so we get some family time before nursery. Some days at nursery they don't nap much but catch up on home days. Bedtime with one of the twins is a bit fraught - someone has to sit in with her or she goes ballistic - but it's nice quiet time, I can just quietly breastfeed, and i intended to do some more sleep training once things settled down.

The last week they have been getting up at 4, which is killing us all. They get out of their cots, wander in to our room and are generally ready for the day. I am not.

I have bought a groclock and will start trying to use it tonight. But I would be v grateful for any other advice. We can't get bedtime any earlier on nursery days as we don't get home in time. I feel like their naps are too long but I am terrified of them getting overtired, and to be honest I always fall asleep then so it would be heartbreaking to cap it....but I think maybe I have to. And I know it's a bad time to do anything drastic - if you guys tell me just to ride it out I will, but we are on our knees. The baby doesn't sleep really unless he is being held so we really need a break somewhere!!

So many thanks for reading such a long and rambling post. I am so tired!!!

Offline anna*

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Re: In a mess with EW, messy bedtimes....and a new baby!
« Reply #1 on: June 22, 2015, 08:13:17 am »
(((hugs))) you must be exhausted.

We had great results with the Groclock. We used it in conjunction with a gate at the bedroom door so that my DS could not just walk out of the room (else he would have, for sure). The clock will only work if you are 100% consistent with it. We told my son that if he looks at the clock and sees the moon, that means mummy and daddy are sleeping and his job is to grab his lovey, stretch, roll over and go back to sleep (we role-played this so he knew what was required of him). He was waking pre 5am so we set the clock for maybe 5.30 to begin with. Of course, the first morning there was a huge amount of screaming at the gate he had a major tantrum that things were changing up on him (we expect this from toddlers, right?). I stayed in my room and any time he quieted down a little I would say "The moon is on your clock. Mummy is sleeping. It's sleep time."

As soon as it hit 5.30 (he had screamed the whole time), I went into his room, turned on the lights, gave cuddles, showed him the sun on the clock and reiterated that now it's morning time we can go downstairs.

The second morning he screamed for a while but did eventually quiet down.

The third morning he screamed for a while but did get back in his bed. After that, I started moving the clock forward by 10 mins every couple of nights so very soon we were at 7am which was our wake up time. He would wake up, briefly look at his clock, and go back to sleep (just as you or I would if we woke up at 4am).

With such short nights, I would doubt your twins are under-tired, I would suspect more that they are already overtired. If you can't get them to bed earlier then I hope the Groclock will help them get some more sleep in the morning.

I hope that helps. I would strongly consider a gate at their door, else I don't know how you will get them to stay in, unless you are prepared to do a lot of silent return with them - I couldn't do that with my son it was too upsetting for both of us he would go hysterical.





Offline 4isstillnighttime

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Re: In a mess with EW, messy bedtimes....and a new baby!
« Reply #2 on: June 22, 2015, 09:48:16 am »
Thank you  :-* glad to hear a success story!!

They can climb over gates so I think it will have to be silent return, sounds like it is going to be a long week. I have my mum arriving to stay for the week though so now is the time. They are only at nursery mon-wed so I can do early nights the rest of the week if I need to....and nap in the day!

Should I carry on letting them sleep as long as they want for nap then? I wake them at 3:30 always, and usually at 3.

Wish me luck!!

Offline anna*

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Re: In a mess with EW, messy bedtimes....and a new baby!
« Reply #3 on: June 22, 2015, 11:22:15 am »
I don't think I'd mess with the nap tbh, for now. If the gate won't work you can get those covers that you put over a door handle to stop it from being opened. Good luck!





Offline 4isstillnighttime

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Re: In a mess with EW, messy bedtimes....and a new baby!
« Reply #4 on: June 22, 2015, 18:22:31 pm »
Ok, they have been sent home from nursery with a vomiting bug...but we have set the gro clock off anyway. I've set it for 5....is that reasonable? I want successes so thought 5 was achievable whereas 6 prob not.....

Offline anna*

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Re: In a mess with EW, messy bedtimes....and a new baby!
« Reply #5 on: June 22, 2015, 18:24:58 pm »
Oh I wouldn't start until you are sure they are well. But once they're better I would set it for 15-30 mins after they usually wake.





Offline 4isstillnighttime

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Re: In a mess with EW, messy bedtimes....and a new baby!
« Reply #6 on: June 26, 2015, 18:16:21 pm »
Well....it seems to have worked remarkably well!! We are up to 5:30, twin 2 started being sick today so have stopped making it any later for now, but when they do wake up before it I just go in, put them back to bed and say "the clock is still blue" and they lie down again! Not sure they go back to sleep but maybe that's the next step!

Thanks again!

Offline anna*

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Re: In a mess with EW, messy bedtimes....and a new baby!
« Reply #7 on: June 26, 2015, 18:24:16 pm »
Fantastic! Keep moving the clock out as soon as they're both well again - I think in a way it can help if they're having to wait for longer: they get bored waiting and nod off back to sleep! ;)





Offline 4isstillnighttime

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Re: In a mess with EW, messy bedtimes....and a new baby!
« Reply #8 on: June 27, 2015, 19:49:00 pm »
The only unfortunate side effect is that they have started noticing and talk in about clocks a lot.....and twin 1 doesn't pronounce the letter "l" very well.....so we are getting some funny looks!!  ;D