Help with my distracted 6 month old please!

[KellyC]

My DS Zander is almost 6 months old and is currently exclusively breastfed.  Up until the last couple of weeks I had no intentions of changing this in the near future (except for adding solids to his diet of course).  Just lately though I'm really struggling to get him to take decent feeds during the day as he won't concentrate and wants to look around the room the whole time and fidgets so much.  It's not too bad if I take him to his room and feed him in the dark but it's a bit impractical and if he ever needs feeding whilst we're out it's a complete non-starter as I spend the whole feed trying to get him to face me instead of outwards at the rest of the world!

So I'm wondering once he hits six months (I know it's only psychological but I wanted to do it at least for that long) whether to start replacing his 2 day feeds with formula and only BF him in the morning and the evening.  These feeds are usually pretty good as for the first one he's hungry and the last one he's started to wind down for bed.

I know this sounds ridiculous before I've even said it but I can't help thinking that by changing to something which is easier for me it means I don't love him so much anymore.  Of course it isn't true but I'm so upset at the thought of it yet struggling so much to get him to eat properly.

I've looked at some old posts and it seems as though this could be a common phase with 6 month olds so I want to give Zander the chance to get through it before I make any changes to bottles which I later regret and can't undo.  Does anybody have any advice which could help?

Thanks as always

Kelly x

[daisymelan]

Kelly, You are not a bad mama at all!  Think of the head start you have given you lo in life.  But I can relate to what you are going through, I think most bfing mamas have been there.

{{{{hugs}}}}

But, as you said, it is likely just a phase.  I know it's impractical to go into his room, etc, but the phase likely won't last too long, but it's really hard to say as each baby is different. 

Have you tried nursing with a nursing necklace on that your lo can play with it?...  lots of mamas say that works.  The only thing that seemed to work for us is to elimate the distractions.  So to the bedroom we went, but it passed.  He still gets distracted every once in awhile and it's back to the bedroom, but generally he's much better.

I'd give it a bit before you go to bottles, give him a chance to organize all the new things in his world and he'll be back on before you know it.    

Hope that helped.

[KellyC]

It does help thank you.  I think I needed to know that it was something lots of LOs go through to stop me making the decision to change to bottles because BF really has suited us so far and it would be a shame for both of us to stop.

I do have a nursing necklace but so far it hasn't helped, perhaps I'll try it again.  I actually fed him with a blanket over him earlier!!

My DH is called Owen too!

Thanks again
Kelly x

[Samuel's mum]

I want to also add to the chorus that this is just a phase! It may last a few weeks or a lot less. In my LOs case I remember feeling so so desperate but now when I look back it really didn't last long. Keep persevering! My friend's bottle-fed baby had a similar phase at a similar age. She struggled to get him to take the full feed from the bottle. There are so many fantastic benefits to nursing. This period will seem like a blip when you look back. If you move to bottles there is a whole other heap of inconveniences, not to mention expense.

[aj's mom]

I am having the very same issue but DD is only 4 months.  She will eat just fine for the first 4 to 5 minutes then is sooooo distracted and will not continue.  The only thing that works sometimes is bringing her into a dark bathroom but she has started to cry when I do this now and I hope it is not scaring her.  Nothing works!  Is 5 minutes of BFing enough for the 3 hr easy?  She wakes twice to feed at night, and I also dreamfeed her at 11, so in total, I give her 6 feeds plus she wakes for two (2am and 5am). 

[KellyC]

Hi

I wouldn't say a 4 month old waking for a couple of night feeds is unusual but I imagine if she would eat more during the day then it would be less likely and maybe she'd only need one.  This is why it's so frustrating, I really don't want to get into a pattern of feeding at night as I know my DS is perfectly capable of going without if he's had enough during the day.

Today I fed Zander with a blanket over him (which I held away from his face) and this seemed to help to some extent.  He also gets frustrated (lazy I think!) when the flow doesn't come so fast after the first few minutes so I feed him from one side then when he starts fussing I put him on the other and when he fusses on that side I finish up on the first side and keep him there for as long as possible to get the hind milk.

I hope something works for us both soon!

Kelly x

[Liam and Shane's Mommy]

I've started the flopping back and forth between breasts for my 9 mos. old for the same reason.  I too have to feed him in the bedroom with the lights dim and totally quiet.  The other thing I've been doing is feeding him more frequently.  I know its not following the 4 hour EASY but essentially I split bf's into two, before and after solids.  It ends up that the after feeds are close to his naps and he gets quite sleepy.  I don't want him to associate going to sleep with bfing so I try not to let him fall asleep but to make sure he's getting enough its pretty much the only thing I can think to do.

Myself I haven't found it a stage he seems to be growing out of but it also started later with my son.

I would try feeding them in a room that has no associations of play or bright colors etc.  I've never fed my son in his bedroom but in mine which is usually quieter and darker.