6 months old spirited baby self settling problem

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thank you I will

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I am back, no sleep, exhausted  . Last whole week I tried to keep her on 3 hr A and we had lots of NW and mess. I was still rocking her before sleep but it went very fast (she would fall a sleep within few minutes).  Her naps were still not uniform and too short...

Adjusting EASY to two naps is killing us... Finally she slept great for the whole night with one eating (from Sunday to Monday). I was so happy thinking that is that, yeah right  . At evening everything went downhill (I wrote EASY bellow). She woke up screaming, scratching me, pinching (very aggressive), and nothing could calm her for two hours (rocking, nursing, walking, music...) then she fall a sleep in my hands and when I try to put her in bed she was freaking out... and then everything starts from the beginning... last night the same thing... During the day she is of course in cranky, wants lots of attention... I really do not know where is the catch - maybe OT?  In addition when nights are such a mess I do not know how to deal with A time - to cut or not?

Here is EASY from Monday
WU 6.53
A
S 9.56 - 11.34 (1.38 hr)
A
S 2.46-3.59 (1.22 hr)
A
BT 7.15 , WU 9.20 screaming.....fall a sleep  0.20-2.22 WU screaming, S 3.17-6.16 (ate), S 6.27-8.24

TUE

WU 8.24
A
S 11.20-12.20 (1 hr)
A
S 2.50 - 4.55 (2.05 hr Baby Bjorn)
BT 7.52, WU 9.57 screaming... fall a sleep 10.45-2.00, WU screaming, ate, S 2.10-5.15, WU screaming, freaking out awake till 7.15 sleep in carrier for 30 min when I wanted to put her in bed disaster and she was awake till 9.15 am (today)
thank you

[jessmum46]

The days don't look too bad to cause that much trouble at night..... Does she have any more teeth coming through?

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I do not see any sign on her gums  she already has two. She started to eat better solids (breakfast) but does not have diaper rash anymore (she got it when we started)... maybe some late growth spurt but last week she started to eat less frequently during night. This morning she slept one hour and now I came back from the outside (she slept one more hour in Baby Bjorn) because she was just crying and was in the bad mood after that nap .

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This night was great in comparison with the last two - she slept from 8 pm till 4 am ate but after that no way she would go back to sleep  I am having my coffee and contemplating about life 

[jessmum46]

(((Hugs))) did you ever manage to get her back to sleep?  I would try to ignore the clock today and just follow her cues and try to get some sleep into her by any means to help her catch up.  I'd try for a super early bedtime as well if you can manage it given how early she was up this morning.  She probably needs her A times shortening for a while until she catches up x

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Thank you 

Yes at 5.53 and she slept till 7.30, ate and continue to sleep till 8.45. Then one 26 min  nap in the car seat (we were at pediatrician) then 1.20 afternoon (finished at 2.12 pm) and the DH took her out for 20 min nap in Baby Bjorn to finish it by 5 pm. BT 8.20 pm ate at 00.30 and slept by 5.30 am today.

Super early bedtime - each time was catastrophy - she would wake up later and could not sleep or awake in the night so I am trying to avoid that. I am thinking when I need to stretch A to BT to go with shorter nap (10 or 15 min)?

Today WU 5.30 am (try to put her back but no way)
           S 8.30-9.28 (58 min)
              12.40-1.24 pm (full diaper woke her up) and she continue to sleep from 1.40 pm
but again I will need to stretch A to BT ...
edit: I tried to cut  A time but she would start to complain and cry so I gave up 

           

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So... yesterday she slept till 3 pm so I did early bed time at 6 pm... result: disaster... she was constantly waking (I did not look at the watch, it started after first 35 min and continued till 10 pm) then she slept till 11.50 ate, slept till 1.50 am (always first half an hour on my hands to calm down) and since then she is awake.....    I know that my DH is responsible for that taking her for an hour (4-5 pm)downtown into the store to buy toy  We live in the city with one million people city so you could just imagine what a mess is in the stores or trams... I thought I will strangle him    is there any topic about stubborn husbands? 

[jessmum46]

LOL we should start one!!!

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I'm back, long time no see  so after one week of adjusting A time we came to the weird point and I need help. Maybe I should post on EASY but it is again connected with night sleep  .

So we reached the point that our first A time is 3.09 to 3.19 hr and she falls a sleep very fast, then the second A is much shorter (I let her to adjust because she is very tired) 2.27-2.44, and the last A time is mess (3.17-3.57 hr). I always put her ten minutes before aimed BT (A 3.15 hr). I am aware that A time are not uniform but naps improved a lot - first around 1.5 hr sometimes 2, second similar, what is a huge progress (I can not remember such a school example  ). I do not need rock, two days she fell a sleep just holding me for the hand  and the rest of days I just took her in hands and it took her few minutes to fall a sleep.

But nights are still bad  ok no screaming but she is waking then she cries because she is very sleepy - sometimes I just put my hand on her and she goes back to sleep; sometimes I need to hold her to sleep (those magic twenty minutes and then put her in the crib) and it goes through the whole night, each two or three hours. It peaked last night -  she was awake from 2-5 am  . She could not even fall a sleep on me... I need to mention that she started to roll a week ago. Each day I let her on the floor to practice. She is showing separation anxiety but we are playing peekaboo. At evening she is holding my hand with both her hands so tight like I will run away so I am sitting next to the crib ....  She is now 7 month and 4 days old.

I assume I need to do something with the second A time but I can not extend it because she is very tired and sleepy. Any suggestion?

edit: she eats around 11, 11.30 pm and then around 4 or 5 am

[jessmum46]

I would try a slightly earlier bedtime - maybe aim for 3hA and see if she settles easier for you.  Is she going to sleep independently at bedtime or does she need you to hold her hand?  If you are there helping her, I wonder if you might have to use a gradual withdrawal approach to help her learn to settle without you?

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Thank you I will. She is not independent sleeper.  She was first three and a half months -  only at evening - I would just put her in the crib and left the room (ah those times...)..... Now as we stopped with rocking I need to hold her for the hand and then sometimes to pick her up for short.... it depends how tired she is. I do have a plan to start gradual withdrawal approach. However at this time point when I try to move just a little bit from the crib she starts to be angry and cry.

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Here I am --- dead---  . Yesterday I planed to put her in the crib at 2.45 A (BT) but few minutes earlier (until then she was on the bed next to me exploring the wire from the headphones  she just suddenly started to cry and scream and I could not calm her down... nothing worked.... even rocking... after a while she fell a sleep in my arms and I put her in the crib around 8.10, then feeding 10.30 and after that she was waking probably each hour I ended put her in my bed but that also did not help a lot... and she is awake completely from 4 am (obviously our standard  ).... and yesterday day looked as usual - two naps - first 2 hr, second 1,5 hr...

[jessmum46]

Hi and happy new year. I apologise for the late reply - how were the last couple of days?

She could certainly have a lot of built-up OT from disturbed nights, but it's difficult to see exactly what's happening when she isn't an independent sleeper 

I think maybe you need to make yourself a clear plan of how to do your gradual withdrawal. So if currently you are sitting by her crib holding her hand until she sleeps, you make sure you do that consistently and perhaps add in a sleep phrase that she can learn to associate with sleep e.g. You're just going to sleep, sleepy time, time to sleep etc.  Once she is settling with that, you continue to sit by the crib, but only use your voice rather than holding her hand.  Every few days move slightly further away from the crib and continue to use your voice to reassure.

If you are going to do sleep training it's important to realise that it's very difficult to change habits without LO becoming upset to some extent, but they are not crying because they are hurt or hungry, but because you are changing things and they are protesting.  You stay with them to help them through the changes so they know they can trust you to be there.  What do you think?

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Thank you jessmum happy New Year you too  .
Things are horrible  . Actually days look like school samples (except today because I let her sleep as long as she wants and it was by 8.30) - she has two naps - each 1,5 to 2 hr (it has never been so consistent). BT - I put her at 2.45 hr (A time) as you suggested and she falls asleep  sometimes at 3hr or 3.15. Nights are getting worse and worse: last night: BT 7.52 pm, W 8.30 (I just put my hand for a short time), 10.44 (feed, fall a sleep very fast) and then started 1.03 (fall a sleep very fast in my arms - only that thing that works, not even rocking), 1.40 - cry and scream and nothing worked, she was rubbing her eyes, very sleepy but could not sleep, after a while she woke up completely and then at 3.05 finally fall a sleep in my arms  first screaming, she could not settle, fighting, it looked horrible..., 5.38 (feed), WU 8.37.

Night before last night: BT 7.36, W 30 min after, then 1.10 hr after, 10.52 (feed, fall a sleep fast), 0.50 - fall a sleep at 1.04, 4.20 was awake by 6 am, slept till 6.40 am


I know that I need to work on her independent sleep and I started and there was a progress - she was willing to be in the crib and fall a sleep just holding my hand...We do have the phrase and ritual......Now we are almost at the beginning- she can not settle down when she needs to go to the crib (today even during the day but she falls a sleep immediately in my arms) cry and scream  . She is using paci when she goes to sleep but then she spits it out during the sleep. When she starts to wake replugging paci does not help - she does not want it.... I do not know from where to start when she is so irritated immediately when she needs to go to bed or when she wakes in the night ... I will need to figure it out how to do that...