8.5 month twins, night waking and early morning waking,

[nippo]

I want to give you a big hug. You really are doing well. Honestly, I am so impressed at how far you've come on your own.

Can your husband take some time off to help you for a couple of weeks? I do think it is supremely difficult doing it alone xx

[4isstillnighttime]

Hugs gratefully received! But sadly no, I'm in it on my own. C slept for a hour after the feed then woke up at 5 really upset. I took her into bed with me as she was waking Z and she snoozed for half an hour. We were all up at 5:30. I feel like it's one step forward, 2 steps back though. I know her teeth are hurting her but when I try to resettle her I have to hold the dummy in her mouth or she pulls it out, she's in a real state! I think she can usually do the routine replugs herself now so it's just whatever is going on at the moment!

[Buttonbobs]

Many many hugs sweetie.

I agree that this sounds like discomfort from the teething. Like pps have said, do whatever you need to to get by for now (even apop), get yourself some rest too if you can and remember that however awful this feels it WILL pass.

I'm not sure what meds you are using but remember that if she's really struggling (and not able to get comfort from her dummy) you can give paracetamol and ibuprofen together. This can sometimes be of help when one of them is not enough alone.

[4isstillnighttime]

You are all lovely!! I think tonight I will give paracetamol and ibuprofen when I feed at 1 or 2. The trouble is it's such a battle getting it down her but if I have it ready in the syringes I can squirt it in when she's screaming!

Thank goodness it's nearly the weekend. One more night on my own then back up will appear. It's just so hard to find any joy in parenting at the moment. And it's not fair on the girls to have such a grumpy mum all the time!

[babybarr]

Hugs and def do both meds. I agree about giving yourself a break and allowing some ap. Remember it can be undone. Well that's what I'm telling myself.

[nippo]

Believe me I was one grumpy parent while doing it! And it does seem like nothing is happening for absolutely ages. But it will happen.

When your husband gets back, you will have to get him to do at least one night so you can get your breath back.

It sounds like teething pains, I felt like mine were forever teething and still no teeth! Draw a line under last night if you can. Today is a new start. I just you could have a bit more rest, you see things differently when you have a sleep. Just think - one more night and the cavalry arrives!

Xxx

Xx

[4isstillnighttime]

They are hopefully just going to sleep, then I can have a shower, some coffee and some frosties! And the world will look brighter. And I will try to nap or at least rest during their afternoon nap, the housework can just disintegrate as my lovely husband will sort it out when he gets home! And I have pizza and wine for my supper to look forward too!! 

So is it ok to pat or shh or feed etc if they are getting really upset? I try so hard not to bring them into bed but I just feel so tired leaning over those cots!!!

Please do a little sleepy dance for me at bedtime if you are reading!!!

Ps button bobs is your profile picture your daughter? Her hair is beautiful!!!

[babybarr]

Have you tried just leaving them alone if they are just whinging / moaning and only go to them if they are crying?  Do they set each other off?

Have you tried pupd with Z (if she's the one who doesn't have the dummy?) also with C (if she's the one with the dummy - sorry very tired brain here too!) have you tried just letting her pull the dummy out?  With H I've noticed recently I put him down with the dummy he pulls it out and plays with it has a loud cry and then conks out - usually without dummy in his mouth.  However he will replug in the night and I can use it to settle him and resettle him...weird huh?!

[Buttonbobs]

They are hopefully just going to sleep, then I can have a shower, some coffee and some frosties! And the world will look brighter. And I will try to nap or at least rest during their afternoon nap, the housework can just disintegrate as my lovely husband will sort it out when he gets home! And I have pizza and wine for my supper to look forward too!! 

Yay for DH doing the housework and mmm to pizza and wine You make sure you take that rest sweetie.

So is it ok to pat or shh or feed etc if they are getting really upset? I try so hard not to bring them into bed but I just feel so tired leaning over those cots!!!

Pat/Shh is absolutely fine and is not apop at all - it's a perfectly reasonable sleep training method. I know some children come to rely on it a bit like a prop, but it's an easy one to gradually withdraw from so don't worry about that. You are trying to break a feeding to sleep association (I think - apologies if I've misrememberd) so I would try and avoid feeding to settle them if you can, but like we've all said above, do what you have to do to get by. Once the teething passes you can focus on doing things the "right" way. More (((hugs))) for today.

Ps button bobs is your profile picture your daughter? Her hair is beautiful!!!

Thank you sweetie, yes that is her hair. It is lovely, but a nightmare to brush. When she can do it herself it will be wonderful xx

[nippo]

Just to say that I followed buttonbobs advice, if you look at my thread you can see that little twin had full blown tantrums in bed. But I shush patted and held back when she got frustrated with me. Most of the time I didn't pat as they got really irritated by it. They preferred me laying my hand on their back and the other underneath on the chest (they slept on their tummies). I think they felt like they were being held even though they were in their cots.

I shushed until they were quiet and about to fall asleep as the shushing stopped them from actually falling asleep. They quite like drifting into a quiet sleep.

It took a two weeks for the 3 hours to become 2 and another month for it to lessen. But all through this time they were getting used to being in their cots and not being fed or held.

[4isstillnighttime]

Brilliant! Plan for tonight is then....

1. They only had 30 mins at 9 as they just woke up. Will put down at 1 and then aim for asleep 4 h after waking. Hopefully at 7!!
2. Self settle at beginning of night. Dummy in hand not mouth! Me not in room (they can do this now, minimum whinging, lots of dummies in cots though, that was a great idea!!
3. No feeding before midnight. Meds at first feed for both of them.
4. Shh pat if needed. Hold my nerve. Post extensively on here. No babies in bed!
5. Back to bed as soon as husband home.

Both have dummies Laura but Z is really a thumb sucker. PUPD enrages them!! They settle with shhh pat but it became a prop v quickly....but I guess to tide us over the teeth it is better than coming into bed. I don't actually shhh, just say shush, shush, relax, it's sleepy time as actual shhing enraged them too!! I do leave alone if whinging but C last night did a real, frantic, I need mummy cry....which did wake Z. Usually they don't really. c does the same as H with her dummy - I think from the sound of it they are quite similar sleepers!

Nippo - I'll try that, think they'd like it!


One more thought. I am trying to drop some BF as am going back to work in 3 weeks. Today for the first time they have drunk some formula out of sippy cups. The only one they will tolerate is HIPP and I noticed they have a goodnight milk. Do they work?? I am thinking I could give them a formula dreamfeed at midnight or something......when I say I I obviously mean my husband when he's home!! It's never really been an option before because they wouldn't take a bottle but also I wondered if that would be less nice than a BF so they might not bother waking for it??

[4isstillnighttime]

Oh, and BB I had that kind of hair as a kid. Remember the brushing tantrums v well indeed!!! When my mum went into hospital my dad took me to a neighbour to have it done as he couldn't face it!!

[nippo]

Sounds like a good plan. I've never used good night milk but it is heavier than breast milk so might keep them sleeping for longer. Give it a go. It can't hurt!

Xx

[Uglybethy]

Yep sounds like a good plan.... Amazing to even have a plan given the night you've had so well done you!
How would you feel about doing meds when they first go down and then again if they were really unsettled (you know following the dosage guidelines etc)?
Re night feeds. You could switch to formula from a bottle or sippy but either way you are looking to wean it. With the formula you just water it down and with the bf you just reduce the time. At least with the formula your hubby could do it when he was home though!
Good luck I with the rest of the day!

[4isstillnighttime]

That would work. Could give first dose with supper then next dose at first feed. I gave some ibuprofen at bedtime yesterday and C settled much better. Tooth no 4 is bulging and no 3 is just cutting so poor little soul is a bit miserable. Currently her favourite teething toy is Z's head, which is a small problem!

Just to show off - they self settled at about 13:15. C has woken 3 times but first 2 tines re plugged herself and went back to sleep, 3rd time settled v quickly with dummy and a quick back stroke. Z has had a hand in her head at about an hour but both still sleeping....nearly 2 hours in!!