Tyler (2.5 yrs old) has started having issues with bedtime. He's always been a good night sleeper and on a routine, so I don't know why it's a problem all of a sudden. Yes, he was sick with a double ear infection one month ago, and it messed with his day and night behavior for a few days. Once he started feeling better, he was fine at night again. That was several weeks ago. A few days ago, he randomly started flying into a tantrum as soon as we started his bedtime routine. We stuck it out and dealt with it and managed to get him back on board with getting ready for bed again. He's been fine with that for the last few nights. His new thing happens after we say goodnight and leave the room. He's fine for about 10 min, then he starts whining. Not FOR anything, just this annoying, sing-songy whining/moaning noise. The first night, I did respond to it once to see if he needed something. When I walked in, he stopped whining and just stared at me, even though he's more than verbal enough to tell me if something was bothering him. Since then, if he's just whined, I've left him to it...responding seems like it would be rewarding the behavior with attention, so I haven't. For the next 2 nights, he whined himself to sleep after about an hr. Tonight, he kicked it up a notch...the whining escalated until he was all-out bawling. I responded to his crying, and again, he stopped as soon as I walked in and stared at me. Reassuring him from outside the door didn't work...he'd stop crying and start barking out random demands to get me in the room (want the light on, want the light off, want the door open, want the door closed, etc...all things he can get up and do himself).
Whining, I can ignore...it just feels so wrong to ignore all-out crying. But it's soooo obvious there's nothing wrong and he's looking for some attention. I can't trace it back to his routine, since he's in the midst of giving up his nap and who knows from day to day if he's overtired or not tired enough at bedtime. I just don't know how to respond once he starts crying in earnest. I think he's old enough to know how to use crying to his advantage, especially since he's more than able to verbalize his needs. What do I do?!