Hi, sorry you having such trouble but great job of getting her to sleep in her crib.
Summary of what i am going to write...yes it does get better.I have lots of tips for you so here we go:
Mia normally wakes at 6am and we were getting her up to start the day at this time, but since the 45 minute nap situation we've been feeding her and putting her back to bed until she wakes at 9am as she is hysterical by late afternoon
That could be adding to the problem - that is essentially a big nap in am and then she may not be tired enough to sleep more thru out the day. You need to think of her naps and night sleep as a total number.
I've read on one of the threads that babies sort out their nightime sleep for the first 3 months and then work on their daytime naps - have any moms found this to be the case?
Yes, this is correct.
I've abandoned wake to sleep before the damage is permanent!!
Have you read the announcement at the top of the page - great info on this tech. It takes time to get right and you maybe aboandoning too early.
Mia was knackered this morning after being up for an hour and half - we put her down in her cot after her usual wind down
It could be that this is too long and by the time she was in her crib she was completely overtired. Try reducing A times by 15min. General rule for short naps - under 3mos, less A time vs. 3-4+ mos, increase A time.
This:
I have more luck to be honest popping the dummy back in just as she wakes up - I can sometimes get an extra 10-20 mins out of her.
and this:
More alarmingly she had an unsettled night - needed her dummy a couple of times which has never happened before
Makes me think the dummy isn't helping. If she is falling asleep w/it in her mouth and it falls out during sleep then it could be a problem as she is looking for it upon waking. Try removing it before she falls asleep or think about getting rid of it (see how in props forum). Remember, How they fall alseep is how they will STAY asleep (w/ paci, w/ breast, in your arms, etc).
It just seems to be defeating part of the object - getting her to sleep longer so I can have some Y time. hovering over a baby is not what I call Y time!
The time you invest now, will pay off later when you can just pop her in the crib (totally awake), say good night baby and walk away for 2hrs!! You are teaching her to sleep and it takes time. She is new at this sleep stuff, try and be patient w/ her :wink: . I know from experience how hard sleep training is and add to that trying to care for all their needs when they are awake!! Yikkes :shock:
do you find sometimes backing off and not being consistent is the best way?
Yes, consistent but not rigid. Just make sure you don't use the props more then 3x's in a row or 3 days in a row.
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Right our story:
My LO started the 45min nap at about 3 months. I search high and low for information and found Tracy’s work, then this site. By this time Megan was now well into 4mos and I moved her to 4hr EASY as Tracy recommends and the short naps got a bit better. I then used shh/pat, pu/pd (very little) and wake to sleep techniques to get her body used to sleeping thru the 1st sleep cycle as by now it was a well ingrained habit. We saw improvement almost immediately (although small, but it was improvement) and I was convinced Tracy’s work was a godsend.
We worked on her naps for 2 weeks solid and after much shh’ing and back aches we started sleeping about 1.25-1.50 for most naps.
Things were great for 2 wks after beating the 45min nap monster. But then the monster came back. I thought I would fall off the deep end. What I didn’t take into consideration was that she was older now. So I increase her A time by 15min and poof…the monster was gone again. 2.25hr of A time was the magic number for us.
We have now been thru the 45min battle several times over, every time she is ready to increase her A time she starts the short naps. So when that happens I know it is time to adjust her schedule or prepare to drop a nap.
Hope that helps