Author Topic: NW and SA for 2.5yr old after C-section for #2  (Read 1128 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline dumbmum101

  • New & Learning The Ropes
  • *
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 46
  • Location:
NW and SA for 2.5yr old after C-section for #2
« on: June 23, 2014, 20:48:52 pm »
Hello all

Looking for some advice and tips to help our DD get back to independent sleep and STTN.

Poor DD Has had a lot of change to contend with in last 3 weeks.  We moved house June 1st, then started settling her into a new day nursery the following week.  And last week a new DS arrived arrived to add to all the confusion. Unfortunately, despite my best efforts I ended up having to have a C-section so was not at home for 2 nights (she visited me once in hospital).  She has been very teary at times and reluctant to let me out of her sight.  I have spent a lot of time since trying to reassure her.  Settling her at BT with strokes and sitting by her cot (even when having to cluster BF the newborn) - but suspect I may have roamed in to AP area. 

Since we moved in to the new house I have been staying with her and doing 'strokes' at BT until she falls asleep and going in to her at night too when she has woken (she has only STTN x2 in 3 weeks).  (Mind you it's be weeks/months since she has STTN as just before we moved the final molars were coming through causing some disturbed nights).

Anyway, have been very conscious of trying to reassure her as much as possible and have special one-on-one time.  I feel she is gradually getting used to the new house and she is so social and curious she can't help enjoying nursery. Very affectionate towards DS too - although not so thrilled that he gets to sleep in our room (despite never having wanted to sleep in our bed with us before or now even).

The major issue is she is waking in the night and taking a LONG time to settle (she has always been difficult to settle from NW's - typically 1.5 hrs - despite being and independent sleeper at BT). She has never really liked dad going in to settle her and often shouts 'No! Go away Daddy. Want mummy'. At the moment she is also is screaming for me and kicking the cot so violently she gets bruises all over her ankles and legs and it upsets us both and I end up going in as well. But as I'm BF'ing and doing night-feeds this is proving a nightmare.

Should we just be consistent and send in Dad no matter what? And deal with the screaming and bruises up her legs until she gets the message that mummy is not coming in at night-times (I have been reluctant to do this until now, out of 'guilt' I suspect for not being at home those 2 days and nights.)

Or should we perhaps work on a GW strategy or similar instead? I actually tried WI/WO tonight at BT and it went quite well.  I kept promising I would be back in 2 minutes to check on her and came back twice whilst she was awake, to ensure she knew I was keeping my promise, then left her for 5-10 mins and she'd drifted off....

Any thoughts/ideas/strategies gratefully received... Luckily DS seems to be angel/textbook baby  ;)

Offline dumbmum101

  • New & Learning The Ropes
  • *
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 46
  • Location:
Re: NW and SA for 2.5yr old after C-section for #2
« Reply #1 on: June 24, 2014, 05:42:07 am »
Just a quick update. As I said WI/WO seemed to work at BT. DD woke at 4am and was calling for me. Dad went in a few times just to pull up her blanket over her legs and pat her shoulder for reassurance. She started to get more agitated when he sat alongside her cot and was trying to explain that 'mummy was asleep'. So I pulled him out of there quickly and only sent him back in x1 for another blanket re-position and shoulder pat (no conversation/ no engagement). Spent a few minutes more moaning but must have gone off by herself at some point (not sure how long though).

So perhaps a bit of tough love was all that was required? Maybe a simple case of AP'ing? But would still appreciate any tips or advice in case there's a better, more reassuring way to handle her anxieties?

Offline dumbmum101

  • New & Learning The Ropes
  • *
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 46
  • Location:
Re: NW and SA for 2.5yr old after C-section for #2
« Reply #2 on: June 26, 2014, 08:52:48 am »
Anyone? Still looking for advice on this? Really appreciate some answers or thoughts?

Offline goldmom

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 23
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 735
  • Location: NY
Re: NW and SA for 2.5yr old after C-section for #2
« Reply #3 on: June 26, 2014, 13:32:45 pm »
I think you're doing good. It is a lot of changes for you LO, but it's important to both you and her to get her back into a good sleep habits asap. The first few nights may be a little more difficult, but hopefully she will understand the new changes soon. It will probably help if during the day she has time to accumulate to the new baby and she will realize that you are still there for her also, even though he's around. When you start feeling better after recuperating from the c-section it'll be easier for you too.

Offline HenaV

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 39
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 2249
  • My shining light
  • Location: Northamptonshire, England
Re: NW and SA for 2.5yr old after C-section for #2
« Reply #4 on: June 27, 2014, 06:25:59 am »
I agree, i too think you're doing a great job. All you can do us stay consistent. She'll get there.

Good luck x