Have I lost his trust?

[mumstheword]

My ds is 5 months old today. After going through the crying at sleep time since the day he was born, I finally gave in today and let him cry it out and it broke my heart.  I stayed next to his crib the whole time he cried and stroked his head, and after 20 mnutes he fell asleep. After trying everything else (inlcuding pu/pd) it was all I had left. I always watch for the window of tiredness, we have a routine, he's on a 4 hour easy and take 2 x 2 hour naps. He goes down with just a little fight during the day, but the evenings are terrible. He ccries and screams until I go to him. Until now, I've never left him more than 5 minutes to cry. Now I feel so bad and probably cried more than he did. I'm worried now that he will hate me or his crib and that I have just made matters worse. Has anyone else had this experience?

[Haydensmom]

It seems that all my little one does these days is cry when I put him to bed.  Last night it took about 30 mins of crying before he went to sleep.  And at about 3:30am he woke up only an hour after his last feeding, so once again I let him cry himself to sleep.  Yet this morning he woke up all smiles and giggles, happy for the restfull night sleep that he got.  I used to cry along with him each time I have had to let him cry himself to sleep too.  But he still seems to love me anyway.  Hang in there! 

[chell]

I'm sure he'll be ok....you didn't abandon him, you were there with him and that's the difference. He was probably just crying because he was very tired and frustrated at not being able to sleep. I'm sure things will get easier.

[mumstheword]

Thank you both for your support!
I didn't wake him for his df and he slept through until 6.30 this morning (from 8pm). He only woke up once briefly in the night, but settled himself quickly again. He was all smiles and giggles this morning, looks like he still loves me . I put him down for his nap about an hour ago and didn't murmur once. I think the real test will be putting him to bed this evening.... I just hope I don't have to do this again! I'll let you know how it went.

[brightside]

Good luck for tonight! It must have been heartbreaking for you. As pp said, the important thing was that you were with him the whole time, stroking his head. The cry it out method means that you actually leave them alone for some time. Don't give yourself a hard time about it-you are a very caring mum! 

[chell]

Good Luck, let us know how you get on.

[branran]

My lo went through a bout like that.  I too was not sure what else to do.  I swore there were days that I could watch her every move and still some how we missed the window and she was overtired.  I too spent many nights crying with her.  I does get better.  As mentioned before - good for you for staying with him, that is what counts, he knew you were there.  I know it is tough and sometimes we mommies have to do things that absolutely break our hearts.  Sounds like you all had a better night.  Keep up the good work.  Keep us posted.

[mumstheword]

I put him down at 7.30 pm, he played for 5 minutes in his crib, cried for his paci, smiled at me, turned his head and closed his eyes! He has NEVER done this in the evenings before. He woke up for his df at 11 and slept through till 6. His nap this morning went without a hitch too!. I feel like I've been on vacation. I know there will always be harder days to come, but I'm just so glad there were no consequences like hating his crib (or me).
Thanks for getting me through it, you all made me feel so much better.

[chell]

Well Done You! That's brilliant!