Author Topic: Dreamfeed - How to... (Read 3231 times)

moorhan · « **on:** October 13, 2006, 02:39:30 am »

Could someone please explain to me how to dreamfeed? I usually give a last feeding around 10:00 pm and would like to dreamfeed around 11 or 11:30. Is that too close? How exactly does the dreamfeed work? My baby won't eat unless awake... Any tips?

Thank you.

Kimberly® · « **Reply #1 on:** October 13, 2006, 03:27:18 am »

If your last feed is at 10pm then there is no point doing a dreamfeed.

What time do you put him to bed for the night?

moorhan · « **Reply #2 on:** October 13, 2006, 13:03:16 pm »

Quote from: Kimberly on October 13, 2006, 03:27:18 am

What time do you put him to bed for the night?

Well, he doesn't really have a specific bedtime. That is another question. After his 7:00 pm feed he doesn't want to go down. He is 4 weeks old. We have him in the family room with us on the sofa until his last feed around 10:00 pm. He may catnap, but he will not go down to sleep completely. We did try to force an early bedtime on him, but he just woke up in the middle of the night ready to get up for the day. We then figured that we would get him sleeping longer stretches and then move his bedtime earlier and earlier.

Last night he went to sleep around 10 and woke at 1 and 4.45. He is definately on a 3 hour schedule.

Thanks for the input.

rebecaq · « **Reply #3 on:** October 13, 2006, 15:28:24 pm »

Hi there,

I would definitely put him to bed earlier. 10 pm is too late for a 4 week old to go to bed. Do you have a wind down routine so he starts to associate bedtime with sleep? At 4 weeks, they will usually feed 2 times a night. Can you post what your day looks like?

Thanks!

- Beca

Kimberly® · « **Reply #4 on:** October 13, 2006, 18:10:24 pm »

Try moving that 7pm feed to 6:30pm and having a bedtime routine start at 6pm so that by 7pm he is in bed "for the night" Then you can try a dreamfeed at 10:30pm

* Paula * · « **Reply #5 on:** October 13, 2006, 20:02:31 pm »

I would definitely move bed time to around 7-7:30pm, and then offer the dreamfeed around 10:00.

You could cluster feed and offer a small feed at around 6:00ppm, then do bath as your A time, then wind down and another feed at 7:00.

HTH

Paula x

yaya · « **Reply #6 on:** October 13, 2006, 20:07:06 pm »

Moorhan,how r u getting on? I know its hard when the babes dont 'do what you want them todo'! especially when they are so young. The tips you've got so far ar eexcellent tho and should give it a go! My DS is almost one and our days waver A LOT but somethign I'm VERY strict on is bedtime routine. No matetr what happens we always 8try ) to do the same routine. In the begining it may seem a bit pointless to u if LO stay awake till his dreamfeed but it will start to work out. If he's in the family room he's prob stimulated by whats going on too, I would put him to bed so to speak and then see how it goes..HTH

moorhan · « **Reply #7 on:** October 14, 2006, 13:13:10 pm »

Good morning ladies. Thank you for your responses and interest. We had a terrible evening but a great night. Here is how it went and I would love your feedback...

His day went well. Typical 2.5-3 hour cycles with naps (except for the nap after the morning feeding). Still can't seem to get him to nap after the 7:00 a.m.

His feed at 6:45 p.m. began the downward spiral! He cluster fed until 10:10 pm with a lot of crying and tears from both of us in between. We spent his entire evening cycle trying to get him to go to bed in his crib. Finally....after feeding him at 8:20 pm and 9:00 pm, I nursed him to sleep at 10:00 lying down on the sofa. The only way he will stop screaming in the evening is to nurse him. I promise that I tried all of the BW tricks.

GOOD NEWS now...

He slept from 10:10pm until 3:45am and then from 4:30am until 7:45am. That was his longest overnight stretch since birth. I guess he was tired from the evening crying and also full from the cluster feeding.

What do I do now? We still have to get that evening time between 7 and 10 settled. If he goes to his crib, I won't be feeding him as much. Will this cause him to wake again? Can I just let him catnap between 7 and 10 in the den until we begin moving back his bedtime?

Thank you.

yaya · « **Reply #8 on:** October 14, 2006, 14:11:47 pm »

Hey !So glad you had a better night! Just wanted to share..my DS used to whimper non stop from 7 till 10 most nights till the age of about 3/4 m. My ped put it down to colic, I was pretty sure it was due to being overtired but a lot of people find their babies to be a bit restless in the evening.

Re: morning nap...what tiem is his wakeup and what tiem are you putting him down to nap? What do you do come naptime? Does he go to sleep on his own? Sorry to ask so many Qs but want to get a better picture so I can help!

Bedtme fussiness: What time does your bedtiem routine start and what do u do?

Thanx

* Paula * · « **Reply #9 on:** October 14, 2006, 19:12:36 pm »

Anna,

That is fantastic news about the timings inbetween feeds last night.

A few questions with regards to your routine:-

How does your lo fall asleep during the day. I remember from a previous post, that your lo spends some of his A time in his bouncy chair. Does he fall aslep in his chair or does he fall asleep independantly in his crib?

Have you decreased your A time during the day? How long after the first feed are you trying to get him down for his first nap?

Is your lo having a cat nap around 5pm - if so how long is the cat nap?

Are you cluster feeding at around 6 and then finishing off the feed at 7?

I would definitely suggest doing a wind down time in a dark room and to try and get your lo to bed by about 7:00pm - this will stop your lo from getting overtired. When you do your dreamfeed, you can pick him up out of his cot to do this feed.

Paula x

moorhan · « **Reply #10 on:** October 15, 2006, 00:24:22 am »

Quote from: yaya on October 14, 2006, 14:11:47 pm

Re: morning nap...what tiem is his wakeup and what tiem are you putting him down to nap? What do you do come naptime? Does he go to sleep on his own? Sorry to ask so many Qs but want to get a better picture so I can help!

Bedtme fussiness: What time does your bedtiem routine start and what do u do?

Thanx

This morning he woke up at 7:45. My husband was home and was actually able to get him to nap from 9 until 9:45am. It was a short nap, but better than nothing! My husband walked him around his room until he became sleepy and then put him in his crib slightly awake. He fussed a little and then drifted off to sleep. We had such a feeling of accomplishment. It was his first nap after this feed since birth! We will try to keep it up.

After advice from this board, I tried to come up with a bedtime routine. I fed him at 6:40, gave him a bath, and then fed him again in his darkened room at 7:30. Sort of a cluster feed I suppose. I then put him in his crib awake, but sleepy. He fussed for about 3 minutes and then drifted off to sleep!!! I couldn't believe it. I hope this isn't just a fluke. Let's also hope that his sleeping during the early evening doesn't rob him of his nighttime sleep!

Thank you for your support. I will continue to make the bedtime routine a little earlier.

* Paula * · « **Reply #11 on:** November 01, 2006, 19:47:00 pm »

Anna,

Been thinking about you since the site has been down.

How have things been going?

Hope to hear from you soon.

Paula x

AspenEliz · « **Reply #12 on:** November 01, 2006, 23:59:48 pm »

Anna-

I'm curious how you're doing since the site has been down. 4-6 weeks was WAY tough for me and my lo. I had a lot of crying/fussiness to contend with during that time. I'm hoping things went well for you, but if not, know that things got better for me after the 6 week mark. My ds is 11 weeks and we have different issues now!

Good luck and let me know how things are going!

pittaor · « **Reply #13 on:** November 02, 2006, 03:10:28 am »

Moorhan,
My DD did the same thing exactly as yours. She turned 8 weeks today and this past week it has just clicked. No more 10pm bedtimes. Now it is 8pm and she will sleep through till 3:30. (mind you the time change helped)
I recommend sticking with it and consistency. As well training daddy as well that TV is off during the last feed (sometimes I pump so he can do the last one), we move upstairs to her bedroom and then play the same song each night then she knows sleep is next. We really found that is what made the difference. Routine.

My questions, is the same as yours. How do you do a dream feed? I now would like to do one at midnight to see if she would last the night.

Rena

* Paula * · « **Reply #14 on:** November 02, 2006, 19:02:10 pm »

Rena,

Welcome to the boards.

It is not recommended doing a dreamfeed at midnight, it is recommended to do it closer to 10:00 pm to allow your lo to tank up after the last feed. Are you cluster feeding?

Giving a dreafeed later in the night, could disrupt her sleep routine.

In order to give a dreamfeed, pick your lo up while she is sleeping, if breastfeeding, rub your nipple across her bottom lip, and this should automatically start the sucking motion. When she is finished feeding, place her back in her crib. There is no need to wind after a dreamfeed as because your lo is still asleep, she will take in less air than when she is awake.

HTH, let us know how you get on.

Paula x

pittaor · « **Reply #15 on:** November 03, 2006, 03:19:02 am »

Paula,

Thank you I will try tomorrow night. I figure Friday is a good night, that way if she does wake up and is fussy and won't go down, then my husband can be home the next day to let me have a nap.

I will try the 10pm, I was worried she would wake up and then be fussy.
I will let you know. Rena

Sungrl · « **Reply #16 on:** November 03, 2006, 06:29:36 am »

Hi there,

My DD is 6 weeks old and I have been trying to get her to bed earlier. She is on a 3 (sometimes 2.5) hour EASY routine and for the past 6 weeks she has followed this, but does not go down for the night until around 10pm or so (usually we start putting her to bed at 9:30 but it takes a half hour or more to get her to sleep). I do her bedtime routine after her feed at 7:30pm and she normally would be sleeping around 8:00, but she always wakes at 9:30 or so to eat again (even though I feed her at 7:30pm). Then it can take around 30 minutes to get her sleeping for the night. I have been trying to move her bedtime to 8:30 or 9:00pm.

Tonight I put her down to sleep around 8:00 and she had not woken at 9:30 like she normally does. So, at 10pm decided to try the dreamfeed. DD has to take medication every night between 9 and 10:00pm so I give her a bottle of EBM with the medication mixed in. After some probing, DD finally took the bottle of EBM and ate it up without waking. I then laid her back down to sleep and about 5 minutes later her body started moving and within another 5 minutes she was wide awake and moving around a LOT. She is very very active during they day when awake and naps are often restless. She gets really active when overtired; arms flailing, legs bicycling, head back and forth. So she woke after the dreamfeed really frantic like this and I changed her and swaddled her...but it took until 10:45pm to get her back to sleep. It was almost like the milk made her hyper and agitated. As a side note, the medication she takes MAY be contributing to her activeness and restlessness as it CAN have these kinds of side affects on infants... however, it is not the kind of thing that would affect her immediately after consuming it like that.

Any thoughts??
Shannon

* Paula * · « **Reply #17 on:** November 03, 2006, 19:09:49 pm »

Rena, just to let you know, it can take up to a week for the dreamfeed to be effective. Good luck and keep us posted on how you are getting on. xx

Hi Shannon, firstly canyou post your routine so I can get a rough idea of how your day looks? With regards to the dreamfeed, it can take up to a week for it to work and be effective.

It definitely does sound like your lo is overtired and would definitely suggest a bed time of around 7:00 / 7:30. Have you considered cluster feeding? The 1st cluster feed would be after the 5pm cat nap, then bath, and then clusterfeed again after bath, and then in bed by 7 / 7:30. Then you could try the dreamfeed and with your lo not being so overtired, it may be more effective.

Let me have a look at your routine, and can give you more info from there.

Paula x

Sungrl · « **Reply #18 on:** November 03, 2006, 19:37:22 pm »

Hi Paula,

Our day goes something like this.

Wake at 8-8:30am - Eat
I normally lay her on her back and sing/talk to her for a bit, and change her diaper - Activity
by around 9am she is showing signs of tiredness already so I put her back to bed - Sleep

She then will sleep until 11 or 11:30am - Eat
We then get dressed, play a bit and I put her in her Papasan chair (which she loves) - Activity
by around 12:30-1:00pm she will be ready for bed again - Sleep

Some days she will sleep good during this time and other days she will only nap for 45 minutes. Some days we are also out around this time and she will sleep in the carseat.

So, sometime between 1:45 and 2:30 she will wake - Eat
Then we do tummy time or something like this (unless we are out) - Activity
3:30-4:00pm she will be ready for another nap - Sleep

Again, sometimes this nap goes well, other times she jerks awake after 30-45 mintues. Often I will try to get her back down if she still seems tired/fussy when she wakes up.

5:00- 5:30 she will wake - Eat
She goes in the swing or Papasan or something while DH cooks and we eat dinner - Activity
6:00 or 6:30 or so she is tired again - Sleep

7:30 or so she will wake - Eat
We get into PJs, have a massage, sometimes a bath - Activity
8:00-8:30 back to bed - Sleep

She then generally wakes at 9:30 hungry again. I have to give her medication at this time so I put it in a bottle of EBM.
She is normally fairly fussy after this feed so I try to just get her back to sleep. Often she will go down and wake up every 10 mintues or so for about an hour so it can be 10:45pm before she is in bed for the night.

She normally wakes around 3:30 or 4:00am and I feed her and she goes right back down to sleep.
Some mornings she sleeps right until 8 or 8:30am, other times she wakes aroudn 6:30 for another feed, but goes right back to sleep again until 8:00 or 8:30am.

Shannon

* Paula * · « **Reply #19 on:** November 03, 2006, 21:13:41 pm »

Hi Shannon,

Have you tried extending your naps by using Pat / Shhh. You could also try going into her room just before the 30 minute mark, and put your hand on her and when she jerks, you can shhh her then to help her transition into a deeper sleep.

After the 5pm feed, I would just let her have a cat nap of around 45 minutes then wake her, you can do your bath as your activity, then feed again after the bath, then start your winddown routine for bed. If she wakes at 8 - aim for a 8 bedtime, if she wakes at 7, aim for a 7 bed time. Although ideally you want to try and get her in bed by 7:30ish latest.

With doing the cluster feeds you may find that she will be able to go longer and won't wake up before the dreamfeed.

I am not sure what to suggest about the medication - perhaps just taking time for her system to get used to it.

It can take up to a week for the dreamfeed to be effective and start working, so it may be worth persevering with it.

HTH, Let us know if you have any other questions.

Paula x

yaya · « **Reply #20 on:** November 03, 2006, 21:28:09 pm »

Anna, how are you getting on?

moorhan · « **Reply #21 on:** November 26, 2006, 17:59:26 pm »

Hi ladies, this is Anna. Thank you so much for your interest in us. Things are going much better. The evening fussiness has subsided substantially. He is now 10 weeks old. He will actually take a little catnap sometimes during our dinner. We then start his bedtime routine between 7 and 7:30. He is asleep between 7:45 and 8:15.

He is still waking at around 3, but last night he did not demand a feeding at that time. He went from 7:30pm until 6 am with no feeding! I hope it wasn't a fluke.

We still have not gotten any better at the dreamfeed. It just wasn't seeming to make much of a difference. We are skipping it for now. I'll see if he continues to stretch his feedings. If not, I may try the dreamfeed again. I think we were doing it a little too late. Also, we have trouble staying up until 10 pm to do it...

Thanks again!

* Paula * · « **Reply #22 on:** November 26, 2006, 19:46:43 pm »

Hi Anna,

That is great news - I am so pleased that things are getting better.

With regards to the dreamfeed - it does not work for every lo, and by the sounds of it your DS is doing fantastically without it.

Keep us posted on how things get on.

Paula x

News:

Author Topic: Dreamfeed - How to... (Read 3231 times)