4 hr easy and long A times for 4.5 mth old

[goldmom]

My DD is 4.5 months, and tends to do best with longer than average A times (we're starting to hit 2.25-2.5 hours). She is EBF (2 bottles EBM) and I would like to postpone solids until she is 6 months. I can get her to take close to two 2 hour naps, but then she's going over 4 hours between feeds (closer to 4.5 hours). Should I be concerned about that, and what happens when she wants to go even longer and her feeds are even further apart? Is it ok as long as she is sleeping until the next feed?

We also have issues with the last catnap of the day, I used to pick her up from the babysitter at the ideal time for her catnap, but she doesn't sleep in the car. I've been able to give her a 30 min nap as soon as we got home, but then she'd stay awake for another 1.5 hours afterwards, but I'd like for her to go down for the night earlier than that. So I'd like to skip the catnap - but I'm concerned it's a little too early for that, as she then has a very long stretch until BT. I tried tweeking our routine to extend her naps till later in the day, so the last A time is not so long, but I'm still concerned:

Our day yesterday looked like this:

7 AM - WU & Eat
9:30  - S and needed resettling at 10:20ish (resttled in under 5 min)
11:30 - E
1:45/2 - S (straight thru)
3:45 - E
6:45 - E
7:15 - S

At around 6:30 (when I used to feed her) she seemed tired/hungry, but I didn't want her to have a catnap and an even later BT. This would have been an ideal day, BUT at 4:20 AM she woke up and was really hard to settle for around 45 minutes (I even tried feeding her again - as she already had her typical DF at 10:15 (woke up for it) & a night feeding around 1:30, which is typical for her). This was the first time she had such a long night waking in a long time, so I'd like some feedback if there's something wrong with my day. I'm hoping it was a fluke.

I had to wake her for the new day at 7:15 AM

During our previous routine, her nights were from 8 PM - 6:30/7 AM, I'd like it to be from 7:15 PM - 6:30/7 AM. But now she's ready for a longer A time, so her old routine won't really work anymore.

[Ima shel Alon]

Hi and welcome to BW!

Should I be concerned about that, and what happens when she wants to go even longer and her feeds are even further apart? Is it ok as long as she is sleeping until the next feed?

I wouldn't be worried if her feeds are spaced 4h or so, if weight gain is good and she is taking full feeds when she IS feeding.

Re her EASY I would be very cautious because her A times are already really high.
IMO she still needs to be on three naps, that's the only way for her to have enough day sleep and not have hard to settle NW. Have you tried to give her her CN at a set time and AP it if needed. I am not sure when are you coming back home from the sitter, but let's say offer the CN at 17 and AP if needed and insist on it till she falls asleep. If she doesn't fall asleep then I'd go for an EBT because 3.5h A time is just way too much for her at her age.
You anyway want this CN to be a CN and not a full nap, so she can go down for it rather UT, yk?
What do you think?

[goldmom]

Yesterday we had a similar day, and while there were a few NW, they were quick to settle (even without feeding). She did wake for the day at 6:20 sounding really hungry (she used to just wait nicely for me to feed her at 7).

I would AP the CN, but she's impossible, I pick her up at 5:15PM and drive home for 15 minutes, which is a great opportunity for her to CN, but she never has (not even at a younger age, when she really needed it - she just cried if she was very tired and waited for me to put her to sleep when we got home). I've been giving her a CN at 5:45/6, and trying to make sure she doesn't sleep past 6:15 or so (so it could be really short), but I really want her going down for the night at 7:15 or so, and not 8. I used to start BT at 7, but she would just fuss till 8, now though she's tired enough to fall asleep at 7:15 with minimal help.

Oh, and trying to get her to sleep when she's not tired is so hard - she screams hard, and as she's a stomach sleeper, she lifts her head really high and will not rest it to even try to settle to sleep, even with shush-patting. That's why I keep moving her A time, she's easier to settle when she's up longer, and she'll also sleep longer this way. She's still so young, but very aware and with it. How early can I drop the CN without worrying about it. The reason I dropped the CN completely was b/c even on the weekends when I could CN her earlier, she just screamed till the normal time for the to go to sleep. Is it possible that after a few days of getting used to this new schedule she will just settle well into it without the multiple NW?

I can try an earlier BT, but I'm so concerned that if she only sleeps 11 hours at night, then she'll keep waking up earlier and earlier.

[Ima shel Alon]

but I really want her going down for the night at 7:15 or so, and not 8. I used to start BT at 7, but she would just fuss till 8, now though she's tired enough to fall asleep at 7:15 with minimal help.

I am afraid it doesn't always work they way we, parents, want it to go. I think that if you continue with a very long A time before BT she will accumulate OT and you'll have many more problems than you have now.
It's just for a little while that you'd need to have a later BT, just till she is around 6m old and manages 3h A time, then you could drop the CN. You can read about this transition here: All about the 3-2 transition- 5/6 months

I can try an earlier BT, but I'm so concerned that if she only sleeps 11 hours at night, then she'll keep waking up earlier and earlier.

The idea with EBT is not that they wake up earlier and earlier but that they catch up on the lost sleep. It doesn't work for everyone, but it does work for many babies.

[goldmom]

I think that if you continue with a very long A time before BT she will accumulate OT and you'll have many more problems than you have now.

Ugh, last night we had NW every 2 hours till 3:30 after which my DH swaddled her real tight and she slept till 6:30. I guess we'll try with the CN again at 6 and push back BT again. Hopefully that will help.

Looks like we're getting close to the 3-2 transition and that link was a pretty accurate description of what we're going through. When she wakes at 6:30 AM, she tends to have close to a 3 hour A time (We have a set nap time +/- 15 minutes since she's at the babysitter then, and my husband drops her off - and it's been too hectic trying to get the message through if her nap needs to be adjusted, I'm only able to get the message to the sitter if the WU was really early - and DD has been taking long naps in the morning even with this long stretch). So I'm going to try to push the A time out to 3 hours in the middle of the day over the next 2-3 weeks or so, and then hopefully by the time she's 5 months she'll be ready to transition. We're also trying to keep her naps at close to 2 hours so that she's not awake for too long during the day. Does this sound good?

Ever since she was born I couldn't wait for her to reach 6 months...almost there.

[Ima shel Alon]

I would postpone pushing to 3h A time for as long as you can. It's always better to increase A time when the baby os actually ready rather than deciding for him that we push it. It's still possible, but you will not be able to prevent OT that way.

[goldmom]

So DD is now 5.25 months old and we've settled into a good routine with capped naps to allow for a CN at the end of the day:

WU&E: 7AM (BF)
S: 9:45 (1.5 hours capped)
E, A:11:15 (5.5 oz EBM)
S: 1:45 (1.5 hours sometimes capped)
E, A: 3:15 (5.5 oz EBM)
S: 6 (30 min max capped at no later than 6:30)
E, A: 6:30 & 7:30 (before her night song, so not to sleep, BF)
BT: 7:30 (but only falls asleep between 8/8:30 depending on how close to 6 I was able to get her down for her CN)

Her nights are pretty consistent with a DF (usually she wakes for it) around 10 and a NF between 2-3.

Her A times are about 2.5-2.75 hours, and she will settle by herself for all her naps except the CN.

Her days are starting to get too long though and I wasn't sure if this is good. Should I try to start transitioning to 2 naps by pushing her A times a little (she could possibly do it) and BT at 6:45/7? When we were on two 2 hour naps she wasn't taking her CN, but her nights were more disturbed than they are now, but that was about 2 weeks ago, she might sleep a little longer for her naps if we let her (I've been capping them so that there would be enough time for the CN at the end of the day, but sometimes she is awake after 1.5 hours of napping).

What do you think?

[Ima shel Alon]

It's hard for me to say. Some babies drop the CN at around 5m already so you can give it a try if you want. But I wouldn't drop it all at once, I would increase the A time gradually till the CN doesn't fit anymore, and then would aim for BT to be around 12h after her usual WU.