Help, DS no longer want to nurse

[SylvieA]

Hi
I'm sure some of you have read my posts before and know that I had been weaning my son from Bfeeding. I did a big mistake buy doing so. My son is a refluxer and started getting worst with formula. (after trying different kinds we are now on alimentum, which is a bit better) But does not compare to breast milk. I've been pumping 5 times/day until I get my full supply back. We never stopped the morning bfeed, but this morning he started crying and sceaming which resulted to a bottle. I feel so rejected and sad the he doesn't want to bfeed. It is really frustrating. He is the same for all the other feeds. He will not bfeed at all. What could I do to get him to bfeed again.  He gets distracted easily so I turn everything off and try to have a quiet time with him. It doesn't happen.
His behavior has been a bit off lately. He's normally an angel baby but he's been fussing a lot. I really don't know what is happening.
Oh, And he'll be 5 months on the 14th of this month. 

[deb]

Mine gave up the breast once she realized that a cup, especially one with a straw, was much faster than Mommy's spigot! LOL I tried for about a week, but although I managed to convince her once while she was mostly asleep, apart from that one time I may as well have been offering her my knee as my breast.

Keep trying, but if he doesn't go for it, try other ways to get milk into him, like a cup (like a small votive or shot glass), or a cup with a straw, or even a sippy cup (might have to remove the gasket for a freer flow for some babies). I've read some suggestions about putting something good-tasting on the nipple to get them to go for it, but if he won't even put his mouth there he won't ever get to the good-tasting part.

And I know it's not really help with nursing, but IF he decides he's done, at least you're still pumping and giving him as much of your milk as you can. At 5 months, hopefully his reflux will subside soon.

Good luck, and I hope other moms have more suggestions for you. Keep us posted!

[daisymelan]

I have not had to cross this bridge so I don't have great advice.

The only thing that came to mind was to try when he's in a good mood and when he's not really hungry.

I hope you are successful.

I tried for about a week, but although I managed to convince her once while she was mostly asleep, apart from that one time I may as well have been offering her my knee as my breast.

Deb, you crack me up!

[SylvieA]

Thanks for replying
I'll try the sippy cup. He might get less comfort from it than bottle. What kind of sippy would you get. I was looking at them the other day, there are so many, I don't know which to chose. And I'll also attempt feeding when tired. He used to fall asleep when he was tired so I'm not sure how that'll work. Thanks again.

[Samuel's mum]

I guess you could try the reverse of what the other recent post was talking about - only offer the breast for 48 hours. I've heard people talking about 'nursing honeymoon' when you stay at home for a couple of days and have lots of skin-to-skin contact.
Keep pumping - A bottle with breastmilk in is still the gold stuff.
If it's really important to you I would also have a chat to a helpline or the LLL. You may find they can 'peer mentor' you with someone who has had similar experiences and they can give you some tips that haven't occurred to us.

[lady_mira]

My lo just started to refuse bf today as well. She will be 5mon on the 11th. I thought it might be related to teething since she's biting, drooling & showing other signs. She takes bottle just fine but when I try to bf she starts to cry.  Let me know if you find anything that works to get your lo back on track

[SylvieA]

MY DS is teething. He's been showing signs for a while now but it's getting worst. He fussed all day yesterday. Which is unusual for him unless he's tired. He did OK this morning. Hope it goes well the rest of the day. I've been using a homeopathic remedy(I never believed in it before we tried it, was recomended by a friend) that seems to help him calm down, it's called camilia and is made for teething. I might try that before feedings today and see if it works.  And let me know too if anything helps.

[lwwho]

Hi LadyMira and SylvieA,

I just wanted to let you know that I had the same problem with my DD when she turned 5 months. I attributed it to nipple confusion because this breast refusal co-incided with my going back to work and my having to introduce the bottle. At that time too, I think the distracted phase was coming on and it was just too too boring for her to be facing just the boob. With the bottle, there was just so much more she could touch and see and do. I too posted many desperate pleas for advice and support. It really broke my heart that she wouldn't nurse readily and screamed and arched her back whenever I tried to put her to my breast. With stress and her fussing, my let-down was slow or wouldn't come at all and this made matters even worse. Those were the darkest days of my life! I don't have a perfect solution cos she still doesn't want to nurse during the day...she has too many things on her baby agenda other than nurse! However, she now nurses after her 6pm bath, just before bedtime. Also, she still wakes at about 3-4am in the night... she nurses readily then. My dreamfeed has always been, and still is, a bottle feed of EBM. Just a few things that other mummies have suggested and that I thought helped:
1. if you have to use a bottle, use a small teat so that the flow doesn't come so readily.. otherwise the LO gets lazy! It takes 40 muscles to BF but only 4 to bottle feed!
2. nurse when your LO is sleepy (just about to sleep or waking up)
3. offer a bottle first until BB is not ravenous then try to slowly offer the breast
4. keep offering the breast at every feed but DO NOT force the issue... if she refuses, then don't press on... it will make matters worse... definitely no forcing her head to your breast!
5. try inducing a letdown before she starts to suck so that she will get an "instant reward" of milk .... 2mths on and I still have to do this other wise my LO will just scream and not come to the breast! *sigh*

I know how awful it feels when your LO wants the bottle more than you... just keep at it and don't see it as rejection of you but just the breast as a separate entity. Good luck and I hope this has helped. PS it took me close to a month to get her back to the breast even just for the night feeds. HTH!

[SylvieA]

Thank you sooo much for the replies. I feel better to know I'm not the only one. And lwwho thanks for those tips, it all makes sence and will be trying that.

[lady_mira]

Good news!  She took the breast today.  When I first started feeding she wasn't latching properly & I got a nipple guard from my DR. I remembered this & used this this morning. At first she fussed but then started eating.  After a few minutes I removed the guard & tried putting her back on, she wanted to fuss but then took just fine.  She's been eating ok ever since.  I'm not sure if it will help you but it's worth a try.  Thanks & good luck!