Hi all. I'm new here and in desperate need of help. I have been pouring over books (BW books included), my head is spinning with theories and techniques, and I don't know where to start. I'm feeling like a failure of a mother at this point...Here's the scoop...
My DS will be 13 weeks old tomorrow. I have no real routine for him, although he is more on a A.E.S. routine, instead of E.A.S. He has a VERY hard time falling asleep without a boob in his mouth - my fault, I know. We have tried every size, shape, and brand of pacifier, but he won't take one of them. (He is showing interest in his fist, so I'm hoping maybe he'll find his thumb sooner or later!) He will fall asleep if someone bounces with him on an exercise ball, or he sometimes will suck on someone's pinky finger.
But it's usually the boob he wants. In creating this bad habit, we've also created another one....he's a snacker. Very rarely throughout the day can I get him to do a full nursing session (on both sides). On the rare occasion that he willingly takes a bottle, it's only about 2 ounces of EBM.
During the day, once he is asleep, he will either 1) wake up as soon as he is put down, or 2) sleep for 20-30 minutes. VERY RARELY will he sleep longer, unless someone is holding him or he is in his swing.
Our not-so-great "routine" at night looks like this...bath, jammies, nurse until asleep (which happens on and off while we get my 2 year old to bed), and then sleep in the swing (not moving) from around 9 pm - 11:30 pm. Then I feed him (he usually eats well) and we go to bed. We are co-sleeping at this point, although I am quite ready to stop. We co-slept with my 2 year-old until he was 11 months, but this one is not working so well. He rouses about every hour looking for the boob, which I quickly give to him so as not to cause crying that would also wake my 2 year old across the hall! Needless to say, I'm exhausted, and my back is killing me in the morning. Never during the night does he really EAT much, it's just comfort nursing. But he is certainly addicted! (My husband sleeps through all of this, BTW). DS usually wakes for the morning around 7 am, when my 2 year old comes bounding onto the bed!
During Activity time, he is a happy, engaging baby! But I certainly need to get some of these issues fixed. I just don't know where to start...how to I get him on E.A.S.Y....what's the first step? Boob addiction? Doing full feedings? Sleeping in his crib?? Do I start the shh/pat method, or the pu/pd method, since he is just now 3 months? AAAHHHHH!!!!!!!
Also, we are leaving for vacation in a week. Should I start anything now, or wait until we return?
BTW, did I mention my 2 year old has not been sleeping well either the past month? I think he's a bit jealous. Things are better, although he is still getting up once in the middle of the night. Just looking for some empathy and support.
Any help, suggestions, step-by-steps, would be greatly appreciated.
THANK YOU!!!!!