Early Waking, almost 6 mo

[Aishi]

Hi

Thanks for the support. It is hard and frustrating and I am fed up. Afiya is baby number 2 and I did everything right this time...no AP no props no co sleeping...I would put her down drowsy or awake from when she was tiny! She was fine with it and always went to sleep quickly and quietly. Whereas my son I did everything ur not supposed to so I blame myself for being sleep deprived for two years with him. That's why it's even more frustrating even after doing it right it's still gone wrong!! I'm just so fed up ( my husband works late almost every evening and goes in early, I have no family nearby who are supportive of BW they think I should keep her up all day!!

But I won't let her CIO again. I know it doesn't work. I tried it out of desperation with my son when he was 18 months for 5 days and we were both miserable. It was the worst thing I've ever done as a mother. I had a crazy moment last night ( she's always such a happy baby and I made her cry-she never cries (( just like my son.

It was a bad night but We started afresh today...2h50 min A time and 1h20 nap exactly so I'm thinking still UT. Extended nap and its been half hour and she's still asleep...think I'm going to let her catch up as much as possible. Longer A time tomorrow...I'm feeling more positive even if still sleep deprived. Why do we become so obsessed with sleep? I remember being able to party and stay up all hours when I was a teen...

Thanks again for the support girls and I'm sorry for letting BW down by letting poor afi CIO lat night ((

[Aishi]

Can you clarify for me: a too short first A time can cause EW, too long A time before bedtime can result in OT nw in early part of night.??

What effect does too short A time before bed have on night sleep? And what could cause nw after midnight and EW if morning A time is appropriate?

Thanks

[Aishi]

Today's easy

Wu 6.45 (ssh pat from 5.15- kept hand on till 6.30)
A 2h50 min
E 8 pm
S 9.35-12.10 I woke her (initially woke after 1h20 (ut?) and took half hour to resettle)
E 12.30 pm
A 3h15 (3 h A yesterday gave UT nap)
S 3.23-5 (woke after 30 min (OT??) resettled in 10 mins)
E 5pm
A 2h
S aimed for 7 pm BT as she can usually only do 2 h before BT but fought it
BT 7.35 pm should I increase last A time? A few days ago 3h A before BT resulted in several nw as she was OT so what to do before bedtime too?

How long will it take before I see a diff in nw after midnight and EW?

[becj86]

a too short first A time can cause EW, too long A time before bedtime can result in OT nw in early part of night.??

Yes, a too short first A time lets baby tack the first nap onto night sleep and can actually shift their night later. Too long A time before bed (or poor naps during the day) can cause OT wakings early on in the night.

What effect does too short A time before bed have on night sleep?

It can mean LO goes to bed UT and cause long happy NW in the early morning and/or EW. It could also mean LO fights BT til they are OT and you get OT wakings early in the night...

And what could cause nw after midnight and EW if morning A time is appropriate?

UT at bedtime
Discomfort - LO is in light sleep for much of the second half of the night, so can easily wake. This can be as simple as LO being cold/hot, teething...
Developmental leap - LO practises physical milestones in their sleep... and mental leaps just mess with sleep because LO's brain is working overtime.

S 9.35-12.10 I woke her (initially woke after 1h20 (ut?) and took half hour to resettle)

Yep, waking at 1hr20 and being hard to resettle is classic UT. Keep pushing that A time

S 3.23-5 (woke after 30 min (OT??) resettled in 10 mins)

Probably more related to UT/broken nap in the morning than the A time, I'd say.

[Aishi]

That's great! Very useful to know! Should I keep he second A to 3h15 if she has a good first nap or take it back to 3h? Thanks

[becj86]

Yeah, I'd leave it at 3hr15 if she takes a 1.5hr or longer nap first up

[Aishi]

Success! She did 7.30pm to 5.45!! I managed to keep her quiet but not asleep till 6.45 do should I start easy from 6.45- that won't make her OT by nap would it?

Also 5.45 is still too early, how do I get her back to 7-7? Do I need longer than 2.5 hrs A time before bed too?

Tia

[becj86]

Yay!

7-7 is a base (same routine below), its not always going to happen exactly like that... what was her EASY for yesterday?

7 - wake
10 - nap
11:30 - wake
2:45 - nap
4 - wake
7 - asleep for the night

[Aishi]

I know yeay! I was thrilled- up at 5 waiting for her to get up tho lol

Yesterday easy

Wu 6.45
A
E 7.45
A 2h50
S 9.35-12.10 (30 min resettle at 1h20 mark so UT?)
E 12.30
A 3h15
S 3.23-5 (10 min resettle at 30 min mark so OT from disrupted am nap?)
E 5pm 6.30 pm
A 2hr (was aim but took 30 min to sleep!)
BT 7.30 pm

[becj86]

Yeah, I think you need to push that morning A time further. Honestly, if she does 1hr20 again, I'd be tempted to just do 3hr second A instead of 3hr15. I think your day is getting close to too long from spending so much time resettling that 1hr20 nap in the morning. That would bring that second nap earlier and hopefully give you a better night.

[Aishi]

Ok seems like we're getting there doesn't it? Fx'd I didn't just jinx things! Thanks again for all ur help Bec!

[Aishi]

Ok today's easy so far

Wu 6.45
E 7.20
A 2h55
S 9.40 (5 min resettle at 43 min- don't think she was UT think noise from kitchen woke her) think ill stick to 3 hr am A for a few days wdyt?

Should I do next a at 3h cos I resettled am nap or stick to 3h15 cos it only took 5 min to resettle?

[becj86]

I'd go with 3:15 A time - its a solid nap in my book

Noises just as they're transitioning can jolt them out of sleep (as you witnessed today) but if she resettled so easily, I'd say she wasn't UT.

I'd stick with the 3hr A first up for a few days and only extend further if that first nap starts shrinking again.

[Aishi]

Thanks Bec! On another note I was going to start BLW on Tuesday as she'll be 6 months. Do you think I should wait till nights are sorted or just give it a go? If I do start should I try each new food for 3 days? I'm a little nervous about whole process! It was only when I weaned my son his mpi became really bad and we ended up in hospital for 3 weeks after doctors took months to diagnose him (

[becj86]

I think she's on her way to being sorted now and you could probably start anyway. Any changes in NW will be pretty obvious to you anyway (she's doing a good long stretch now and anything solids-related will show up in the middle of that) and I'm sure you'll be very watchful given your experience with your son. BLW often takes a few weeks for LO to actually swallow anything anyway, so if you feel right starting, go ahead. If your gut says to wait a week or two longer, do that.

You're a good mum and YOU know your children best. xx