Do some babies NOT fall into a nap routine? - 9 months

[texasmom]

I just wondered if I am doing something wrong.  I have tried to get my LO on a conistent nap routine, but he wakes at different times in the morning and naps are not the same each day.  We put him to bed at the same time - even to the minute trying to establish a routine, but things still vary during the day.  Is there something I should do differently or is this the way some babies are? 

Thanks!

[abbykat]

My dd does the same thing - she is 9 months old also.  She will usually go down around the same time every day (not always though) and her nap time varies from 45 minutes to 1.5 hours.  I tried doing the PU/PD method but that seemed to upset her even more.  Whenever she woke up, she was happy.  I believe she sleep as much as she needs.  I have accepted it and we both happier for it.  Hope this helps.

[Lizziebeth]

I think some variation is normal, certainly.  My LO of 10 months sometimes only takes 45 min naps, other times 1.5 hrs. 

Are you having real trouble with your day and getting down for sleeps?  Or does your baby seem happy on his loose routine? 

If your baby is happy and sleeping fine at night, then I'd say there isn't really much to fix.

But if you are having trouble with sleeps and feel like you need some help, then post a rough routine of what tends to happen on, say, 2 different days.  I know it's not easy to do this when they aren't consistent, but even a sketchy idea of your day helps.  I'm thinking that the varying start times to your day might be an issue.

[*Natasha*]

I think this sounds more like an EASY issue i will your post their.

[texasmom]

Oh, ok, thanks.   

[texasmom]

lizziebeth,
Collin is happy during the day, but I have a hard time with timing the naps.  We have night issues sometimes (when he gets overtired I'm pretty sure) and we have early wakings (so hard to have a wake up time the same time every day).  For a while he was doing a consistent 7-5:45ish, but then he got sick, and we've been a MESS for almost two weeks. 

The bad thing that has happened during the day is that I now rock him b/c it's how I can tell if he's tired or not.  If we put him down too early and he falls asleep, he won't take a good nap and then it's a mess.   I used to be able to lay him down and he'd go to sleep - I was better at timing it, but not lately.  I just kept thinking he'd fall into a routine.  I can't believe he still hasn't.  Or maybe I'm not doing it right.

At bedtime we lay him down, and he falls asleep by himself in 15 min - almost on the dot.   

Soo...  I just don't know. 

I just wonder and wonder if I just don't have a good sleeper or if I've caused this. 

Thanks,
Brooke

[Lizziebeth]

Hello texasmom

Ok, it sounds to me that he used to be an independent sleeper but now is not.  Don't worry though, once they've learnt how to sleep before, they usually go back to it.  It's most likely something in your day needs fixing.  Then you probably won't need this rocking anymore.

But first off, are you sure he's not still getting over this illness, has a new illness or is teething?

What are his feeds like?  Often after illness, the feeds are crazily inconsistent.  Or he's just not interested in feeding which will make getting to sleep more difficult. 

But when feeds get fixed, things tend to fall back into place .  How much does he take at each feed, how often are you feeding and is he draining bottles/breast at feeds?  What about solids?   

I wrote something in another thread about sleep cues being difficult to read at this age.  I have a nightmare with my 10 month old and sleep cues and have done for months! 

Let me go and copy it for you.  But first, let me know where you are at with the recovery period from the illness and feeds first. 

HTH!
x

[texasmom]

Oh yes, we are in the midst of a terrible illness now.  Went to the doc, and he has an ear infection, she said he's about to pop a mouth full of teeth, has a TERRIBLE cough and cold, diarrhea, bad diaper rash, etc etc etc...  poor little thing. 

Feeds - he eats about every 4 hours with 2 solids feedings in between.  I'm about to add another solids feeding.  He's been eating PRETTY good.  He's up and down - always has been.  I offer an 8 ounce bottle, and sometimes he drains it, sometimes not.  I can tell that the illness is affecting his eating a little, but not too terribly much. 

So now is definitely not the time to get on track, but I just kept thinking (before all this started) that it seemed like he was never going to fall into a pattern.  A LITTLE bit of a pattern, but not like some moms talk about. 

[texasmom]

p.s.
I meant to tell all of you thanks for your reply!!  I appreciate the input.  It helps!!! 

[rinajack]

Following you around now Brooke, am actually happy to see you around, missed you lately.

Zara has NEVER been consistant about anything.  Not nap times, nap lengths, A times, wakeup times, amounts of eating etc.

With eating and sleeping the slightest thing can put her off.  Too many people around, different person feeding her, too tired, teething, illness, too busy playing etc etc, house guests, staying away from our house, even daycare.

I was really struggling with this, as I am a planner type person.  You really need to read "Raising your spirited child". Since I read this, I got a much better understanding of both my own personality, and my DD's.  And that has helped me increase my level of patience and acceptance when things don't go the way I planned.

I talked about our WO/PD/WO method in a reply to another post you did, you really should consider this.  It helps us, because even if she gets overtired and wakes in the morning, she is learning she can't just get up for the day.

Also, when Colin is not ill any more, come check out this thread, it is useful and interesting.  Colin is a little younger, but much of what we are dealing with is our own response to the early waking problem, so I think it will help you.

Early Wakings

[texasmom]

Well that makes me feel better since ours have always been so similar anyway. 

I tried wi/pd/wo last night, and it worked again.  He woke, I had to give him Motrin, feed him (he barely ate yesterday b/c of how he was feeling), and I had to change his diaper too b/c he has a terrible rash.  Oh, and I had to change his jammies b/c they were wet.  Anyway, I laid him down after I fed him, and he started crying after a couple of min, so I did it and told him, "Go to sleep, sweetie," and I had to go do something, and by the time I got back he had settled down.  He was only awake a total of 30 min. 

Do you mind sharing with me what Zara does now in terms of sleep?

We WERE getting about 10.75 hours at night and about 2.5-3 hours of total naptime (2 naps), but since he's been sick we've been getting about 10 at night and the days are all crazy.  He has been sleeping so much less for 2 weeks now. 

I will check out that thread AND the book.  Thanks! 

It's good to talk to you too!   

[rinajack]

Hey Brooke.

Zara's sleep varies heaps.  Over the last 2 months, her nights have been as short as 9 hours, and as long as 11 hours.  Her days have as little as 1/2 hr, up to 4 hrs.  Depending on where she is (ie it is much worse at daycare) and how her night was.  We are having success with the early waking, and for the last almost 2 weeks now, she has been getting a good 11 hours at night, occasionally longer (often with a slight early wakeup, sometimes requiring my attendance, sometimes not).  Right now, we are struggling a little with 2-1 nap transition - she seems to be going OK, but I am a bit nervous about it.  Last night was bad, and we have an early waking this morning - I actually think teeth, she was very very upset, but it will just mean we need two naps today.

If you choose a consistant approach to sleep, he will start to sleep more, especially if you can sort out the early wakings.  WI/PD/WO has definitely helped us with that.

Also, his sleep will likely improve when he is feeling a bit better.  Keep in mind since he appetite is way off, when it comes back, he may need much more than normal, kind of like a growth spurt.  We also had NW that required feeding after a similar illness here.

[texasmom]

Thanks for sharing...  I just like to know since they have been similar in the past. 

When you say "choose a consistent approach to sleep," do you mean doing wi/pd/wo consistently? 

I wonder if these early wakings have to do with hunger b/c today for the first time in months and months, he woke at 5:05, but he went back to sleep on his own and slept 45 more min.  He got almost 11 hours last night.  (I fed him 8 ounces at 2:15)  I'm going to KICK myself if we have been struggling for all these months, and it had to do with hunger!  Well, past is past.  We'll see.  I'm prepared to feed him tonight, but since we're on the mend, I plan to give him only 6 ounces diluted with 8 ounces of water.  I thought I'd just decrease by 2 ounces each night.  Sound okay? 

[rinajack]

If it were me, I would work towards feeding as much during the day as possible - what is your eating routine - do you already do snacks, or is there scope to add these in?

Then if you do have to feed at night, do it.  But then tomorrow, feed heaps during the day again...soon enough he won't need the night feed.

[texasmom]

Ok, sounds good.  I tried doing that a little yesterday and thankfully he slept from 6:45-6:15 this morning.  Did not wake for a feed.  When things were a little more stable, he'd sleep from 7-5:45, so I say if he wakes at 5:15 after falling asleep at 6:30 (we had to move his bedtime up since he's been sick), that is ok.  When the time changes, it'll be 6:15am, which is decent. 

Here's what we usually do as far as feeding:
Bottle - sometime after he wakes, let's say usually around 6:00
Solids 7:30
Bottle 10:00
Solids 11:30
Bottle 2:00
(I am going to add another meal of solids here)
Bottle 4:00 (I cluster feed to help get him through the night)
Bottle 6:00 - right before bed (asleep by 6:30ish)

[rinajack]

Brooke, I noticed a marked improvement in Zara's nights when I made sure she had solids before bed - not right before bed, but maybe an hour before the bottle.  She wasn't so hungry in the mornings then, which gave me a chance to work on her wakeups.  I think the solids take longer to digest than the milk.  I always make sure now that her "dinner" includes vegies and some protein.

Other than that your schedule looks fine for eating.  For a while, be prepared to offer more than he normally has, so you can see just how much he will eat....then you can adjust how much you offer to how much he actually does eat.

[texasmom]

Ok, great.  I gave him dinner tonight, but darnit, I missed that cluster feed.  Sometimes it just gets so hectic and the time gets away.  But I gave him good solids meals today, so maybe we'll be ok.  Oh, and I did give him protein - chicken - for dinner.  Makes sense, protein keeps me from getting hungry too.  Thanks for all of your advice!