Not so EASY...

[shabec]

I've been using the EASY routine since my son was about 4 weeks old (now 11 weeks old, on about a 3 hr cycle), but having difficulty with daytime naps.  The morning naps seem to be improving, but afternoon naps are not going so well.  He usually naps for between 20 and 45 min, then I cannot get him to settle again.  I have resorted to EASASY or sometimes it ends up being EASAE, because it is getting close to 3 hrs and time for another feed.  This seems to muck the plan up a bit because his activity time after a feed (in the next cycle) is shortened considerably if he has been up after a short nap.  It spirals downhill from there!!
Also, his daytime routine is all over the show, with feeds happening at different times every day, depending on what time he has woken in the morning (this can be anywhere from 5.45am to 7.30am).  This makes it kinda difficult to plan the day, since I never know when he will be taking his naps.  It also makes the end of the day difficult when I need to try and stretch out the last feed til at least 6pm. 
He has always slept very well between about 7-7.30pm and 2-3am, without a DF.  I tried DF for a week, and it didn't make any difference to his night feeds, because he seemed to be too sleepy to take a decent feed at 10-11pm.  The night before last we had a breakthrough, where he slept from 7.30pm til 5am the next morning! What recommendations do you have for the unsettled afternoons and the haphazard daytime routine?

[tracefo]

Sorry I have no recommendations because I too struggle with this.  I often think my daughter needs a clock in her crib to see that she should still be napping! My daughter started sleeping 10 hours a night at about 11 weeks too and has never been a good napper, at least not that I can remember.  All I can say is that napping is supposed to be a developmental thing and it's supposed to eventually get better.  I'm hoping that this is true because I'm still waiting for the naps to be longer and my daughter is 16 weeks.  I'll be very interested in what other people have to say to help with this short nap cycle problem.

[tracefo]

After thought, sorry, try not to stress too much about it.  I sometimes think that those of us who don't have night time sleep problems are destined for the daytime nap issues!  I don't know of too many people who have it all!

[Meg's Mom]

Also, his daytime routine is all over the show, with feeds happening at different times every day, depending on what time he has woken in the morning (this can be anywhere from 5.45am to 7.30am). This makes it kinda difficult to plan the day, since I never know when he will be taking his naps. It also makes the end of the day difficult when I need to try and stretch out the last feed til at least 6pm.

Some suggest to pick a time and wake your LO at that time, but i could never do that when dc was this young.  When dc is a bit older a set wake time will develop on its own.

What recommendations do you have for the unsettled afternoons and the haphazard daytime routine?

  The morning nap does develop first so you are right on track w/ that one. 

Do you swaddle?

Use white noise?

Have room darkened?

Have you tried pat/shhh to get dc back to sleep?

Does dc use a pacifier?

How long is he wake between end of am nap and start of pm nap?

[shabec]

Morning naps are starting to become a lot more predictable over the last few days - he usually has a good 2-2.5 hr sleep.  He is really only in "happy wake time" for between 1 hr 10 and 1 hr 20, then takes between 5-10 minutes to settle, and usually without fail he has rewoken 20 min later.  From there is mostly turns to custard for the rest of the afternoon. 
In answer to your questions:
Yes, I am still swaddling, and mostly he stays wrapped, occassionally one hand fights its way up to his mouth - I guess is it a way of self-soothing?What do you mean by white noise?  I have a stereo going in the nursery, with either instrumental music or the radio. 
Yes, the room is dark.
Patting/shhhing to get him back to sleep generally only gives a very short term solution.  Sometimes, he wails off and on whilst I am patting/shhing, and it usually escalates into a full on crying match, or this happens just after I have left the room.  I haven't managed yet to get this method to work, but maybe I am not spending long enough?? How long should I spend doing this?
We have tried a pacifier, and depending on how upset he is, he mostly spits it out.  If he does manage to hold onto it for 10 minutes, and then loses it, the crying starts up again.

[Meg's Mom]

Swaddle, great…white noise, yes I meant  music or some use a fan or sound machine w/ rain or ocean, etc. 

I would recommend you do shh[pat for at least of 20min for it to work. 

What is happening at the 20min mark when you say he wakes w/o fail?   Does he jolt? 

When an infant enters a sleep cycle, the first 20 mins. is light sleep (with a jolt at the 10 and 20 min. mark) and then into deep sleep from 20 to approx. 40 min. As the infant comes out of the sleep cycle (partially wakes), he/she may let out a scream or what Tracy would call "Phantom cry", and then struggle to re-enter the sleep cycle. It has been my experience that most infants under the age of 6 months, have difficulty with entering the next sleep cycle.   It sounds like he is having trouble w/ the transition from light sleep to deep sleep and/or entering the next sleep cycle.  He is just learning this sleep thing and it should improve on it’s own.  But you said it correctly, this parenting thing is not so easy!  But it does get better w/ time or least this teaching sleep thing  :roll: .

But you could also try to stay w/ him and apply light pressure for that first 20min to help him get past that transition.  Use hand pressure (placing hands on arm/legs to ease if your infant experiences a jolt).

You could also try the wake to sleep method:  her is a link for info on that.  http://babywhisperer.com/forum/wake-to-sleep-for-naps-vt43311.html

Hope that helps.

[shabec]

Thanks Michelle
I have started the wake to sleep method this afternoon, and it seems to have worked keeping him asleep (this time!).  Initially I let him fall asleep on his own, which works OK most of the time.  Predictably, he stirred around 10 minutes - it is not so much of a "jolt" of his body, but he moves his head around and wriggles his body a little.  I applied light hand pressure and gently rocked his basinette during this time and again at around 20 minutes - he opened his eyes and looked around for a bit, but went back off to sleep.  When I was sure he was asleep, I left the room and went back in again another 15 min later.  When he came back into the light phase about 5-10 minutes later, I did the same for the next 20 minutes and he dropped back off into a deep sleep - that was 45 minutes ago now! - a breakthrough for an afternoon nap!!  Do you suggest continuing this every 20 minutes when he enters each light phase, or as happened today, once he is past the first cycle, should he be able to settle himself?

[Meg's Mom]

Excellent work!  I am impressed  - with you both  :wink:

I would give him a chance to do himself and then if you find he needs the extra bit, well go ahead and help him...should start to work itself out w/in a week or so. 

Keep up the good work...

PS: Think about moving him to a 4hr schedule at 4mos if you think he can do it and this will head off the 45min nap monster coming back.

[shabec]

This wake to sleep method is working so well, that he's having 2.5-3.5 hour naps!! and I'm having to wake him for his next feed! Is this too long? do I need to wake him sooner?  It seems such a shame to wake a beautiful sleeping baby that has never napped well before! The only problem I can foresee is he is now only getting 4 feeds per day, and still waking around 2-3am each morning.  He doesn't dreamfeed well, so I gave that up after one week of trying - should I start it up again and persevere?
Also, how do I handle the whole EASY routine when I need to go out - he doesn't generally nap if we're out and about, or if he does, it is interrupted sleep.  This means that it becomes EAYEASY.

[Meg's Mom]

I am so please for you both!

He is 11wks right?  Yes, i see it now.  I would work to a 4hr EASY (gives 4 feeds i beleive, but you will give more oz per feed so he gets his calories)  if he is happy w/ that.  But no longer, he needs to eat AND sleep :-).  You will find great sample sch. in the EASY forum and in Tracy's new book.

As he gets older and his A time increases you will have more time.  In the meantime I would try to do what you need to in the am and not 2 days in a row.

I wouldn't recommend you make any additional changes and let him settle in for a couple weeks.

[shabec]

SORRY TO BE A PEST, but we've hit a snag! It started yesterday afternoon and has been happening all day today.  He's getting to the 20 minute mark, and I can't get him past that point.  I have tried gentle pressure, rocking, and shhhing to try and get him back down again, but he won't have a bar of it.  I am re-entering his room at about 15 min, at which point he appears nice and relaxed and asleep, so am catching him when I first see him stirring bang on 20 min as he does the transition from light to deep, and continuing shhing/rocking for up to 30 min , depending on how wriggly he is.  He completely wakes up, wriggles around a lot, screws his face up and starts crying, so we're straight back to square one.  Should I just leave him, or should I pick him up and start from A again, or should I not worry at all and just accept that some days will be better than others?

[Meg's Mom]

hummmm, wee stinker!

I think i would go w/ the last option "accept that some days will be better than others".

From 0-3 months babies work on organizing their night sleep. From 3-6 they work on organizing their day sleep.  So this is totally normal and one day (very soon) he will just sleep thru on his own and you will have lots of Y time.

Let us know how it goes the next few days.

[Taylor's Mommy]

Just wanted to say keep at it, as you have doen a great job so far.  I do remember the 7 week stretch where Taylor did nothing but 45 minute naps all day and I had to spend so much time in her room I felt like the prisoner! :lol:   But it all worked out and now I have a ton of Y time!

Keep up the good work

[shabec]

Thanks for the vote of confidence Andrea - I feel heaps better knowing someone who has come out the other end...we will soldier on!