How to Transition from Rocking

[soulstar75]

So glad I found these boards! Hoping you ladies can offer some advice to a first time mom.

My baby is 4 months but his corrected age is 12 weeks as he was a premie. So far, he has been rocked to sleep for naps and bedtimes and everything that I come across says that rocking is ok until 3 months and then you should really work on drowsy but awake. I've tried that and it doesn't seem to work. I would like to gradually reduce the rocking as he is getting heavy and its tiring. I would like him to fall asleep independently but I don't believe CIO would work for my baby. I have just become aware of pu/pd and shhh pat which I think we are still to young for, but in the meantime, does anyone have any suggestions on how to reduce the rocking but still get baby to sleep?

[eva026]

Hi there:)

I could have written your post. DD was rocked to sleep for the first 4-5months of her life.
We tried the gentle removal plan: Gentle Removal Plan

So I carried on rocking her to sleep but at the same time I would shh/pat her. Then slowly I was cutting down the rocking time and just shh/patting.
Finally I would just shhh/pat her till she fell asleep. It took a while and she was crying a bit till she got used to the shh/pat alone but I was with her every step of the way. What these wonderful ladies also taught me, was that every change is going to be met with some resistance and crying but being by your baby while they are adjusting is not the same as CIO.

[creations]

Hello and welcome to BW

Already had great advice from pp. I wanted to add that my LO didn't do well with patting as he had silent reflux which is aggravated. I switched to a shush/rub which many others also use.  The rub can almost be like a little rock because there is slight motion caused by the action.  I did this in arms and in his bed.  I also reproduced a very slight rocking in his bed whilst he felt the weight of his body on the mattress I put a firm hand on him and almost vibrated (yeah sounds a bit odd) so there was movement. This can be reduced and reduced in the same way as the patting of shush/pat. The key is to keep moving forward towards your goal and to move him into his crib.

Your LO is not too young for shush/pat which can be used from birth. If he cries you would pick him up to settle in arms until fully calm (or even asleep in the early days) before putting back in the crib where you continue with shush/pat or shush/rub or the firm hand with slight rocking movement.

I don't believe CIO would work for my baby

We don't believe CIO works for any baby. You won't be advised to do any sort of CIO or CC here

[soulstar75]

thanks ladies!

Eva026, since you've had a similar experience, how long (months) did you pat in arms before putting baby in crib? In other words, how old was your baby when you started and ended the transition? Did you also put baby in crib when they are fully alert but drowsy?

During the night, after a feed, baby will go straight to sleep if he is drowsy but its nap times and bedtime that are tiresome.

[eva026]

We also only rocked for day time, nights were fine. Odd huh?
I think she was 4.5 months when we started and we had a week or so of shh/pat/rock, then another week of sh/pat/rock with stopping the rock after a time and just shh/patting. Slowly reducing the rocking. The last bit to just sh/pat in her crib and not in my arms at all was the hardest and we just had to go cold turkey. I actually got really close to her so she felt like she was sort of in my arms and just sh/patted her calm and asleep. There was some crying but I think after a week or two it was ok. It took us a total of around 2mo (from 4.5mo-5.5mo to drop the rocking, 5.5mo-6.5mo to use just shh/pat to calm her in her crib) and another two to reduce the shh/pat to her getting to sleep on her own. From that time on (besides a few hiccups) I just say say it's sleepy time, stick her in her cot, give her a kiss and leave the room, she puts herself to sleep.

[soulstar75]

Oh wow....so it can be done! Thanks for your insight...I'm nervous to try it but it needs to be done. I can't wait until the day I can just put him down to sleep on his own. Wish me luck!!

[eva026]

It can be done, for sure!
Holding your hand all the way through, good luck:))

[creations]

Wish me luck!!

Luck!
I often think it's our frame of mind which is important with these changes. I know I always worry about making changes but they tend to turn out much easier than I anticipated. It's good to have a plan and to keep working in steps towards that end goal.
I would keep a diary of your progress, at times it can feel like you are getting nowhere until you look back at a diary and discover how it's really moved on from the previous week/month. Great motivator to keep going

[emmb14]

I think I am going to try this too. my DS is a huge baby (at 3mo he looks like a 6mo) and I get tired of rocking at naps. I'm also trying to work on making sure he's not OT so doesn't need as much rocking to get to sleepyland. Also going to get a white noise machine at big brother feels compelled to play in the room while i'm rocking and his definition of quiet and mine do not line up.

[soulstar75]

Just a quick update and questions. I'm hoping eva026 can chime in but certainly welcome other opinions.

So right now, the rocking has dropped and all we are doing is patting to sleep. Yay! However, putting baby in crib when he is fully asleep has been hit or miss....sometimes he will wake up within 5 mins from putting him down or sometimes he will have a full nap. Tonight, he was asleep in my arms, transferred to crib, and woke up in 5 mins. To put him back to sleep, I tried getting really close to him in the crib and patted to sleep. He hadnt slept much all day but he's been asleep for an hour! Success!!! So now I want to continuously use this as a sleep approach. I'm wondering:

1. Is it best to go cold turkey and use this (patting in crib) for naps and bedtime or should I use this approach more gradually. Maybe start with first nap only?

2. I suspect baby is about to start teething very soon. Should I hold off on this approach until teething is done?

3.With shh/pat, should I still wait until baby is drowsy to start or should baby be put down wide awake?

4. How long will it take for me to just put baby in crib and have him fall asleep on his own after using shh/pat?

[creations]

Sounds like great progress

1. Is it best to go cold turkey and use this (patting in crib) for naps and bedtime or should I use this approach more gradually. Maybe start with first nap only?

I'd try on every nap but aiming for one per day is fine too, just make it the same one every day so it is habit forming

2. I suspect baby is about to start teething very soon. Should I hold off on this approach until teething is done?

There's no need to hold off but just be aware that if LO is in pain some naps/nights will be harder than others, go gently, if he needs more help at times that's fine, if you can put him down drowsy then great

3.With shh/pat, should I still wait until baby is drowsy to start or should baby be put down wide awake?

shush/pat until drowsy in arms, continue to shush/pat in crib. If possible stop just before the eyes shut, this might not always be possible but it's your aim. When it's consistently possible then reduce how much you shush/pat in the crib.

4. How long will it take for me to just put baby in crib and have him fall asleep on his own after using shh/pat?

All depends on the individual LO and also on your approach.  To keep moving forward with this I would recommend staying alert to LOs signals.  It is sometimes easy to get carried away with the shush/pat and get caught up in the rhythm of it yourself, if you do this you may shush/pat much longer than necessary and be teachign LO that you will always do it all the way to sleep and even throughout sleep. You aim to do as much as needed and no more, gradually reducing a little at a time.

hth

[soulstar75]

Great advice! Thanks so much for your response and insight! I think I will aim to do this for his afternoon nap as that one is usually guaranteed.... the others are hit or miss. Once we are successful with this, I will try for the others and then bedtime. I'm so happy there is progress!!!

[eva026]

Congrats on dropping the rocking:))
Sounds like you have a good plan and are on your way.