stop swaddle then focus on st or st a bit more first?

[mycatmonet]

Ds is nearly 5mths. We tried st a while ago and after a decent start it just never went anywhere...  after blaming ww for his rubbish sleep and behaviour for several weeks enough is enough, it's not that anymore!
Ds is swaddled in a woombie. He isn't quite rolling, have seen him go front to back a few times and once back to front. So really I ought to wean the swaddle soon. Do I go cold turkey and start afresh with st or should I try and get better is then wean swaddling?
Atm I rock ds to sleep most times. Some times he is pd asleep, other times he stirs and I ssh pat for a bit to settle. More rarely I can ssh pat from a more awake state but not often. Granted I haven't tried super hard, at night  I can't have him cry as he will wake dd and that is horrendus, she has her own sleep issues lol
I figured maybe if we can unswaddle maybe ds can suck his thumb and get a lovey... but getting to that point is terrifying.
Can I go ct and start on naps? I don't know if our easy needs tweaking to get him in a better position to start. I try for a 2-2.5hr A depending on last nap... but naps tend to be short. And we have multiple nw, sometimes waking every hour or two. A 3.5hr stretch is a luxury right now. Ugh I think I am doing everything wrong seeing it written down! Sorry this is a long brain dump...

[nevinsmama]

Want to post your day? I would go cold turkey if I were you, things will get worse for a bit ( if you can imagine that!) but then he will figure it out! Would some white noise (LOUD!) help for drowning him out for your DD?

[mycatmonet]

Ha ha ta maryn.. We have white noise on full volume in both los rooms! Its motn here, will post our day in morning... prob need some eyes. Thanks xx

[katie80]

I'd go cold turkey too Caitlin... no use ST twice, esp with another LO in the house. I did some ST at 5mo with my other two and I think it's a really good time to do it. In a week's time, you could see a lot of improvement! (((Hugs))) for the meantime, it's so hard to be that tired!

[mycatmonet]

Ok here we go... no consistency so will give the last 4 days....

Tue
Wu 6.15am
E 7.10am
A 2h5min
S 8.20-9am(40min)
E 9.05am
A 2h20min
S 11.20am-12.45pm (1h25min) in carrier at the shops
E 1.10pm, 2.20pm top up
A 2h5min
S 2.50-4.35pm (1h45min)
E 4.45pm, 7pm top up
A 2h55min
Bt 7.30
Nf 10.35pm, 1.25am (for 2hrs!!), 3.50am (coslept then as exhausted)
Wed
Wu 6.40am
E 7.15am
A 2h
S 8.40-9.15am (35min)
E 10.05am
A 2h30min
S 11.45am-1.20pm (1h30min) with resettle at 40min
E 1.30pm
A 2h15min
S 3.35-4.30pm (55min)
E 4.30, 5.30, 6.20 top ups
A 2h30min
Bt 7pm
Nw 8.45pm resettle ssh pat
Nf 10pm, 11.50pm, 3.15am (for 40, 50 and 45mins)
Thur
Wu 6.45am
E 7.15am
A 2h30min
S 9.15-10.30am (1h15min)
E 10.45am
A 2h5min
S 12.35-1.25pm (50min)
E 2.15pm, 5pm
A 3h50min - would not go to bed!
S 5.15-5.30pm (15min)
E 6.30pm
A 2h25min
Bt 7.55pm
Nf 12.30am (for 40min), 4.05am (best night in ages after rubbish sleep day!)
Fri
Wu 6.15am
E 6.15am
A 1h45min - I wanted to push to 2.5h but dh pd when I was out doing daycare drop off for dd
S 8-8.35am (35min)
E 8.50am
A 2h40min out and about
S 11 15am-12pm (45min)
E 12.10pm
A 2h
S 2-3.50pm (1h50min) resettle at 40min
E 3.50, 5.30, 7pm
A 3h45min
Bt 7.35
Nf 9.35pm, 10.45pm, 12.45am, 2.45am (for 1.5hr)
Sat
Wu 6.40am
E 6.40am
A 2h25min
S 9.05-9.40am (35min).... resettled 9.50am so fx he sleeps a bit more. This morn I pushed the A out, he prob could have slept at 2h but the 2.5hrA worked on thurs!

[mycatmonet]

Oh and I swaddled him this morning. I was too scared to try ct and we gave builders finishing up using loud nail guns etc so I just can't deal with it today. Will try monday.
An issue we gave us also bt... it is easier to do bt fir dd at 7 latest (earlier if a bit ot due to big day, no car cn)... if we pd ds then dd sge has been loud and woken him (despite white noise in both their rooms as loud as I can get it). Dd insists I do her bt, and dh has a bad back and wrists and he can't do pd for ds really.  It is better I do it. Especially if pupd is needed. And it will be!
Also dd usually wakes about 6am. Or between 5-6.30am. Before ds I'd make her wait to 6am to get out of bed but now I get her up as any yelling to get up would wake ds....

[mycatmonet]

This morning the first nap resettled ended up being 1h45min (9.05am-11am with 10min awake at 35min mark).
E 11.15am
A 2h10min
S 1.10-1.45pm (35min)
E 2.15pm
A 2h20min
S 4.05-4.40pm (35min)
E 5pm, 6.20pm top up
A 2h45min
Bt 7.25pm... hoping for a good night like last time nap totalled less than 2.5hrs for the day!

[katie80]

FX for you! It looks like pushing toward 2h30 is the right move. 

[mycatmonet]

So after 7.25pm bt we had
Nf 11.40pm, 2.25am, wouldn't settle, asleep 15min then up again. Coslept 4-6.30am. It's gotta stop but I NEED some sleep right now.
So...
Today wu 6.30am
E 6.30am
A 2h25min
S 8.55-9.25am (30min)
E 9.45am
A 2h35min
S 12pm-1.35pm with resettle at 40min mark for 10min (1h25min)
Going to pd soon for third nap.... the next wonder week is due any day now so that won't help things!

[katie80]

There's always something, isn't there?! (((Hugs))), sometimes you just do what you have to.

[mycatmonet]

Unswaddled today we had 2 x 30 min naps!

[katie80]

Ugh... I'm quite sure that's in my future as well.

Remember this...

things will get worse for a bit ( if you can imagine that!) but then he will figure it out!

(((Hugs)))

[mycatmonet]

Oh katie. we ended up with 3 30min naps and an atrocious night! At one point after an hour of crying ssh pat pupd I put him on his tummy to settle in desperation and he did settle immediately. I watched him on the monitor so I could see his face and he woke after 20 min anyway!
It has to get better!!

[katie80]

Oh no... so sorry, hon. Do you have anyone who can give you a break today, so you can sleep a bit? (((Hugs)))

It will get better, it will get better, it will get better! (that's me chanting and cheering you two on )

[mycatmonet]

Thanks!! No, dh is off for 2 weeks but he is painting our renovations so he is whingy and grumpy and not to be bothered. There are some other words for him too lol. Nope this st is ALL my job... thanks for your support! Xx

[katie80]

ST is usually all me over here too, but I often make DH help out with the other LO or at least let me sleep when I can.   Too bad on the timing for you.  (((Hugs))), happy to continue holding your hand!

[mycatmonet]

Ugh I am so tempted to bring the swaddle back. Ds has flip flapping arms all over the place. Does that mean he is not ready or is it just inevitable?  He woke pretty much hourly most of the night, the odd 1.5-2hr stretch.

[katie80]

Oh dear!

Ds has flip flapping arms all over the place. Does that mean he is not ready or is it just inevitable?

I don't know... I guess if he's not rolling or breaking out, you don't HAVE to get rid of it, right? It could be that in just a few more weeks' time, he'll be more ready. I'd still stick with trying to get him a bit more independent in the meantime.

[mycatmonet]

I am bringing the swaddle back!!! Will try again in a bit. Think that startle reflex is still too strong. I agree, will encourage more is until then!

[katie80]

 

[mycatmonet]

Today I tried ct on the swaddle. Also made more of an effort for sssh patting through the crying... really for naps today it was 5min or less but felt like forever.  So far 2 good naps which is nice. Unlike last night.
At midnight last night it lasted an hour and a half then I fed him, oops. Will try harder tonight. The 6nw nights are killing me.... he needs to sleep!!

[katie80]

Well, overall it sounds much better than a few weeks ago (the ST, I mean), so that's a plus! (((Hugs))) for the NW... it's so hard to make yourself do it, I know. Hope it gets better quickly for you!

[mycatmonet]

Best night in months, yay! After bt 6.45 and a ot nw at 45min he slept til nearly 2am!

[katie80]

Woohoo!! You're giving me hope!

[mycatmonet]

Katie you have no idea, it is a miracle!! I think there is a lot to go for keeping the swaddle until the lo is ready to ditch it. Tummy sleeping has helped ds too, actually.

[katie80]

How's it going, Caitlin? I am so ready to ST, just waiting til I can have help around for the big kids.

[mycatmonet]

Well it's ok, work in progress hampered by teething, a slight cold and an inability to avoid ot on the 3-2 (where he prob needs 3 but will only have 2). Swaddle is gone without a drama though, shows what a difference it makes waiting til he was ready!
Tummy sleeping has helped too. Ds will settle with ssh pat now for naps and bt but I have been aping too much with nf. So need to work on that to stop it. And urgh I think he needs a 2-3-4 type of A time but he ends up awake 4-5 hrs before bed which might not be helping with nws.
But its a start!
Having 1 toddler around while st is hard enough, it would be impossible with 2 other los!

[katie80]

A start it is! Hope you get more smooth sailing ahead!

[mycatmonet]

I tried ssh pat for the first nw... disaster for an hour and then I fed him. Sigh. But today he has his first 2 teeth through.

[katie80]

Oh shoot... well, should get better now that the teeth are through. Hopefully?!