Suddenly NW again - why??

[Brooklyn_Mommy]

My DS is 16 weeks old today. I was so pleased because I thought he had totally dropped the 2 am feed. He used to go to bed at 7:30 or so, get his DF at 11, and sleep through until 5. He did this for about three weeks (even sleeping through until 6:30 once!) and I was so thrilled because I went back to work part-time during that time and was so grateful for the sleep.

Then he got a cold. (So did I.)

The past two nights he has been up at 10, 2, 4, and then up for the day around 6:30.

Given that he is 16 weeks old, I don't know what to attribute this to. Is it:

a) his cold,
b) a growth spurt,
c) a little accidental parenting I indulged in twice (feeling bad for him, and me, I took him in bed with me from 6:30 to 9:30 two days in a row and let him snack and sleep, which meant I got to sleep too),
d) that he is still on a 3 hour EASY and he needs to go to a 4 hour EASY, or
e) all of the above?

What do you think? How to solve this? Thanks very much!

(I should mention that he is almost EBF - his DF is formula and if I can't pump enough he gets one bottle during the day, otherwise it's all BM. I should also mention that his naps have started to be 45 minutes, which I attributed to day care not winding him down properly, but may be something else??)

[~ Vik ~]

Hi and (((hugs)))   Those sound like some rough nights!!  Could you post your EASY?  It may be that some routine tweaking will help, but you do have lots going on so you might also be riding it out for a couple days.  How is he when he wakes?  Happy/chatting or fussing/crying?

Given that he is 16 weeks old, I don't know what to attribute this to. Is it:

a) his cold,
b) a growth spurt,
c) a little accidental parenting I indulged in twice (feeling bad for him, and me, I took him in bed with me from 6:30 to 9:30 two days in a row and let him snack and sleep, which meant I got to sleep too),
d) that he is still on a 3 hour EASY and he needs to go to a 4 hour EASY, or
e) all of the above?

a)  Could definitely be contributing to it!  Whenever my ds gets a cold he wakes more frequently.  It could even be that he's stirring at times he would normally stir and go back to sleep, but because he's snotty/coughing/uncomfortable/etc he cries out for you.  Have you elevated the head of his crib?  You can also run a cool mist humidifier in his room while he's sleeping, that seems to help my ds.
b)  Also a distinct possibility.  The 4mo growth spurt is a big one.  Have you read http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=66001.0 ?
c)  I wouldn't feel too horrible about this.  It's certainly not something that you want to make a habit of, and can lead to problems long term if he gets used to cosleeping, but I think it's unlikely that 2 mornings of that are causing ALL your troubles, especially with everything else that's going on.  When my ds is ill/teething I've cuddled to sleep, or rubbed his back in the crib, or rocked, even bfed to sleep if it got really bad and he's a great independent sleeper.  Sometimes you do what you have to do when they're ill and break any habits later - just remember that the longer you AP for, the harder it is to go back to normal
d)  That is why I asked for your EASY - he may be getting ready for more A time.  With breastfed babies it is a little trickier, as even though they might be ready for more A they often need to feed more frequently than formula fed babies.  For example, my ds was on a 3h feeding routine until 4.5mo, and then a 3.5h routine until 5.5mo.  The 45m naps could be coming from this issue too.

Will pop back to see your routine   Hoping that you're having a better day today!

[Brooklyn_Mommy]

Thanks for the hugs I normally wouldn't mind waking up to feed or comfort him, but I'm sick too!

Here is a typical day's EASY (when I am home with him and he doesn't go to day care). He never really wakes up at the same time so I'll start at 7 for simplicity's sake.

E: 7
A: 7:15 - 8:30 (winding down the last 15 minutes)
S: 8:30 - (could be 9:15, could be anytime up until 10)

E: 10
A: 10:15 - 11:30
S: 11:30 - (could be 12:15 or anytime up until 1)

E: 1
A: 1:15 - 2:30
S: 2:30 - 4 (could also be short)

E: 4
A: 4:15 - 5:30
S: 5:30 - 6:15

E: 6:15 (CF snack)
A: (bath) 6:30
E: 7
S: 7:30 - ?

DF: 11

Wake up and nurse: 5

Those days seem to be gone unfortunately...

Here is what we've got going on today. I decided to lengthen his activity time by 15 minutes starting after my first post this morning

E: 7:30
A: 7:45 - 9
S: 9 - 9:40, 10:10 - 10:30. He woke up early and DH rocked him back to sleep (I know, I know, but I was in the shower!!) and after half an hour up, he went back to sleep from 10:10-10:30

E: 10:30
A: 10:45 - 12:15
S: 12:15 - 1:45

E: 1:45
A: 2:00 - 3:30
S: 3:30 - ? (he is asleep right now)

I have elevated the head of his crib and I am running a warm mist vaporizer in his room as well. I am frequently putting saline drops in his nose and using the aspirator too but the poor little thing is just so uncomfortable. I wish I could make him feel better. I hope my lengthening his A times by 15 minutes doesn't cause him to be even hungrier at night! I have noticed at these NWs, he nurses on one side only and then falls back asleep, so I'm not totally convinced they are from hunger...

[~ Vik ~]

TBH, you may just have to wait out this cold before you get anywhere.  It really sounds like the cold is at least contributing to those nws, and you're definitely doing what you can to manage the symptoms.  It's so hard when they're unwell and you feel so helpless

Usually when ill a lo's sleep needs increase so now may not be the best time to start stretching out As, even if he's ready for them, kwim?  And I do think that he's ready for longer As - typical A time for 4mo old is 1h45-2h, and your ds is averaging about 1.5h (remembering that A is everything from eyes open to eyes shut, so for example your morning A today would have been from 730-9).  You may find that stretching the A times out will help give you better naps, and result in some better nights once he's over this cold.

And don't worry about dh rocking him back to sleep - when he's ill a little APOP (accidental parenting on purpose ) is sometimes what you need to get everyone some sleep and sanity!

Hope that afternoon nap turned into a long one for you, and keeping fingers crossed for a better night tonight.  Let me know what you think