BabyWhispererForums.com
SLEEP => Sleeping For Toddlers => Topic started by: Melsy on September 30, 2008, 22:36:57 pm
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DS#1 Aidan was awake at 5am today. Sigh. And 5.30am yesterday. Sigh. And 4.50am the day before that. And 5.20am the day before that. And 5.10am the day before that. I am so over it. I have been over it for a lllllllllllllloooooooooooonnnnggggggggg time because it has been going on forever. Obviously this must just be who he is. :'( We did get one period for about 6 months or a year when he used to sleep till 6 or 6.30am. That I can handle. 4.50am I can't handle. :( #2 used to sleep till 8am for awhile. Now I think his brother is waking him too often and we never get 8am anymore. :-\
I actually got up at 5.30am and took Aidan for a walk to keep him out of the house so #2 could sleep. We got home from our walk at 7am - just as #2 was waking up so at least he got a sleep in. And it was really lovely to be out walking - felt really healthy. But I would gladly walk with him at 6 or 6.30am with a bit more sleep under my belt!!!!!!!!
I know I have to just suck it up and accept that this is the way its going to be (at least till he starts high school!!!) but it just is making me so cranky and angry. :( I am such a b%tch to him all day long. :-[ He asks me to play something and I say no, that I need a rest. :-[ :'( :-[ I would love to go to bed early to make up for the early starts but I can't for a few reasons:
1) Got a job doing night work - haven't started yet but will a few nights a week be getting home from work at 11pm or later.
2) Dream feed - have to be up to do this for #2
3) Lots of shows that I like to watch like Bones, House, NCIS etc. If I go to bed and tape them, I will never get time to watch them all.
4) Would like to actually spend some time at night with DH having adult conversation after spending the day with two kids.
Sorry for the long post. Writing about it makes me feel less angry towards DS. :-[ Anyone else having early starts - misery loves company you know!! ;)
Mel
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hi hon, we were also have early mornings, i used to take her back to her room and hop into bed with her, we both mostly slept on, later when dd2 was moved into the same room i used to let dd1 hop into bed with us, just recently we added a timer to a lamp and told her morning was when that came on, seems to be working for us, we did at first set the time early and then slowly start adjusting it, if she comes out before the light comes on i send her back and to date she does go back after a small moan
but yes misery does like company, hugs to you
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Thanks for the hugs Sylvia. We have a disco ball alarm clock - worked for about a week - he would wait for the lights to come on, but doesn't work anymore. I try to just tell him its not time to get up yet and he gets violent. :-[ Throws books / toys at the wall, screams MUMMY or DADDY at the top of his lungs and knocks on the door REALLY HARD until someone comes. :( :-[ :-\ :'(
And because his little brother is actually an alright sleeper - I prefer to deal with only 1 child awake at that hour, not two, kwim??
Have tried him in our bed - he wriggles and squirms and kicks and is generally a pain in the b*m. :-\ Also try to be in his bed - he wants to play and read books with me (which is ok but doesn't let either of us get anymore sleep) and I am usually so cranky that I think he can tell, and asks to go watch t.v. ::)
At least i have BW to keep me sane!
Mel
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i feel for you, i really do and i understand about wanting no. 2 to sleep, i was the same and did just about anything to have that happen
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Mel, both Ana (A_C) and I are bemoaning the same issue on Facebook. My dd is 2 yo and has been waking up before 6 am for the past couple of weeks. Her problem is that she's not getting enough sleep so she's overtired. Sometimes I miss her cue and get her to bed for her nap when she's overtired, so she won't nap or will after a long time and plenty of tears. She's even almost stopped napping in the car! (GRRRRR!!!!) She also doesn't get to bed early enough at night sometimes so, again, she wakes up early. DS typically requires my attention (to be fair, he's only 3.5 yo, and I can't just plop him in front of the tv every time I need him away from me) so he'll prevent her from sleeping in some way, directly or indirectly.
Q's for you...
Is your ds napping during the day? If so, how long? What time does he go to bed at night?
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Thanks Georgia and Sylvia
Nope he doesn't nap anymore (well...occasionally he does on a daycare day but very rare) He is in bed, with lights out by 7pm - no later. I know some say I should do an even earlier bedtime, but unfortunately that seems to be about the earliest we can manage with daycare somedays and DH gets home between 6 / 6.30pm and that gets him excited. Last night he was not acting very tired at 7pm so I waited till I saw some yawns and tired signs (sucking his thumb and twirling his hair!!) and then put him to bed - it was 7.30pm. And was awake at 5am. ::) At least I got some exercise this morning ....right?! Who needs sleep. ::) ;)
Mel
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You definitely know your child better, so I can't say anything about his tired cues, however, neither of my kids show signs of tiredness. DD could be awake all day, with no nap, and she'll be acting refreshed and silly when she should be sleeping. DS doesn't usually look tired, either, but I try to get him into bed by 8 pm (he dropped all naps just before he turned 3 yo).
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We are suddenly having the same thing - not 5 am but 5:45 for the past week or so. On a daycare day (M-F) I can understand bc they legally have to give him a 2-hr rest period and I'm sure he dozes off sometimes and gets the extra minutes then, but on Saturday and Sunday he has no nap and is sleeping around 7:15, give or take, so the 5:45 wakeup only gives him 10.25 hrs at best. He's fine - a bit cranky when told no to, but he would definitely be much happier with another hour!!! One day this week he crawled into our bed so dh left, and he and I ended up sleeping until 6:45. But I don't want him sleeping in our bed to be a habit!!
Any ideas - too tired, or not tired enough?
Deb
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Hi Mel!
I just wanted to send you some {{{hugs}}} That must be so hard, especially since it's been going on for that long. We've had EW of the same kind of times, lasted about 6 months, and tht was bad enough. I don't have any advice really just wanted to give you some sympathy and hugs.
xxxxxxxx Vicku
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Hmm.. my comments sounds sort of bitchy to me now. I hope it's just me and my PMS. :D If it's not just me, I apologize.
I agree with sending extra hugs {{{HUGS}}}. If he's not tired enough to nap at daycare but he's still waking up at 5 pm, I feel your pain (or, in this case, tiredness). Darn kids. Don't worry, he'll be wanting to sleep in by the time he goes to school. *hehe*
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Hugs for you Mel- That just plain sucks!
Sleep vibes coming your way~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Thanks for all the hugs and sympathy guys!!! :-* Nice to know I am not alone!! Deb - I am so with you on that question - is he too tired or not tired enough. ??? My brain is telling me he is WAY overtired but has learnt to deal with it, if that makes sense??
Last night was the worst night ever in terms of getting Aidan to bed. :'( He had a flip out because he wanted custard (and found some in the fridge) but it was off. :-X But he couldn't understand why he couldn't have it. Had a total flip out. Screaming, throwing himself arolund etc. :-[ :'( Tried to move on with bedtime routine but it just went downhill from there. He got so bad that DH put him in his room (he had lost his patience BIG time) and Aidan totally trashed his room. :'( :-[ >:( :-[ :( It was awful. Never ever seen him like that. And he totally scared his little brother - he was a crying mess too. :'(
He finally fell asleep EXHAUSTED at 7.45pm - then BANG! 5am like clockwork this morning! :-\ I had hoped the stress might have worn him out a bit more than usual!
Think I will try W2S tonight - am so scared though! 5am is bad enough - if I do W2S at 4am and he wakes completely - well I think I will just go book myself into the looney bin!!! :P
Mel
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sorry about last night, hugs and good luck for tonight
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Oh, so sorry about last night. Definitely sounds like overtired to me, and I think my ds wrote the book on being overtired and just getting used to it...since the day he was born!!
I tried an earlier bedtime last night, he was sound asleep by 7:10 but then had a night waking at 1am - full out crying, something about the blanket so I just tucked him back in and sat at the foot of his bed for a minute and he was out again. Woke and cried again when I tried to leave (creaky floor!) so another tuck in and I told him I was going to the bathroom then back to my bed and would leave his door open.
He probably lost about 15 mins sleep from that, so say he fell asleep at 7:25pm - was up at 5:50. So almost 10.5 hrs, yet again. And he was REALLY whiny when he woke up. Happy if we let him watch tv, but considering we have to dress, have breakfast and be out the door by 7:45, that's not an option.
Sigh...my heart goes out to you, from one mom of a non-sleeper to another. Let me know if you come up with anything that works. Will just keep trying the early bedtimes and if we are up at 5:30, then at least dh and I got some good time together in the evening....
Deb
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Hey Deb - how are things going?? I feel for you with the early mornings and being pregnant. It must be tough.
He went to bed slightly later last night - 7.30pm (couldn't get dinner on the table on time ::)) and I set my alarm for 4am and did W2S. Awake at 5.13am. >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( Not 5am for once, but with the slightly later bed time, that means 9.75hrs of sleep. So not enough I don't think!!! And he is being cranky today so far. Aaaaarrrrgggghhhhh! I have just had enough!!! I am going to go to the chemist shortly to see if there is ANYTHING I can give him, just for a couple of days even, just to try and break this cycle!!!! I am going nuts!!
Am hoping that you have had slightly better luck than we have been having.
Mel
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Oh my gosh, Mel! How absolutely frustrating!! :(
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Is his room dark when he wakes up in the morning? Has he always been an early riser?
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Thanks Georgia. Natasha - his room is pretty dark - he has block out curtains (they are tab top though so a little light comes thru the top) I have just spent $600 on block out blinds to go UNDER the curtains to try to eliminate even that little bit of light at the top of the curtain rail. :-\ He has always been a fairly early riser, but at the more acceptable hour of 6 - 6.30am. Which I can totally handle. The 5am stuff - not so fun.
It is mid afternoon here (3.20pm) and he fell asleep on the floor ( :o) at 2.30pm. I don't know how long to let him sleep for and then what to do about bedtime!!
Mel
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Awh big hugs Mel! That sucks...
Our DD has also always been an early riser (6ish most of her life but have had both bad periods of 4/5am wake ups and good ones of 7/7:30) so I can totally sympathise with you on not liking the 5am ones. Must be so hard with another baby too! We've figured that DD just won't sleep more than 10/10.5 hrs at night no matter when she sleeps, so we can't do bedtime earlier than 8pm if we wabt a decent wake up time. Don't know if you've tried later bedtimes with him? Then if he's not having a nap anymore things are different of course and I don't have any experience of that. Just thought I'd share though. I hope he starts sleeping longer soon! If he falls asleep on the floor that might be a sign of him being OT. Will he refuse a nap if you try to give him one? Maybe he'd benefit from having a structured nap again?
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Thanks Vicki, it DOES suck! I am just so tired all the time - I get really weepy for no reason and I am attributing that to the tiredness. Plus there is the fact that I treat ds like s*it (not intentionally of course) but I am just so darn tired all the time. :-\
He fell asleep on the floor after having a tantrum because I asked him to please lay down for a rest (told him he didn't have to sleep but at least rest) and he lost the plot and started trashing his room ::) ::) ::) as he does. But he slept till 4.15pm - so a 1.75hr nap! ;D But I have NO IDEA what time to put him to bed tonight?? And do I still do W2S (Tracy says 3 days) even though we had no success with it last night??
I guess I am just confused as to what to try next!!! Thanks for all the help and support from everyone tho, I truly appreciate it!
Mel
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You could always try for bed at 8:15 ish as that's 4 hrs A time. Or even later if you think he could handle it, but you know him best, just watch him and see if he seems ready. It might be worth seeing if he'll sleep longer in the am with that later bedtime as he shouldn't be too OT after the nap. Might backfire though, you never know??? I'm not really that experienced of W2S but think if it was me and didn't work 1st time I'd prob not do it again. But that's just me...
I'm thinking try later bedtime and a pm nap to get later wake ups, but who knows what will work??? Some would say try earlier bedtime, but that's just never worked for us, just makes our EW worse.
Here for you though hun! I hope you'll get some sleep soon it's so hard when you're sleep deprived to stay happy and positive.
xxxxx V
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Hi Vicki - well I put him to bed just before 8.30pm last night and he woke at................5.01am. :'( >:( I was so gutted. I thought that with the nap yesterday we may see some tiny teeny improvement. Sigh. I could just cry.
Mel
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Oh hun, I'm so sorry! :'(
How about trying a really early bedtime, like an hr or and hr 30 mins before his usual? He must be OT on that little sleep, so if he then wakes at the same time he would have at least caught up a little. Such a tough situation... People think it's only in the first months parents get sleep deprived, but that's obviously not the case. Sending more big squishy hugs to you though and hoping that that can make you feel at least a little tiny bit better {{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}
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I feel for your Mel. I wish I had advice but I have scratched my head about sleep for the past 3.5 years and it seems every time we get something that works, it stops working!!!
We did ask at his preschool on Fri if he naps consistently, she said no, he lies for an hour awake then for the second hour they let him look at books. But on Friday he napped, she said they usually try to get them all to sleep on Friday (lol..so the teachers can have a break? So as to muck up their entire schedules for the weekend? But really, we love the preschool...) So on Friday night we pushed things back just a bit and he lolligagged getting to sleep so he probably wasn't asleep until 8:00ish. Up at 6.
Saturday - no nap (we don't even try at home bc we can't get him to sleep until at least 1 but if we let him go any past 2 then he's up until 9 or later :O) - asleep by 7:10, up at 6.
Sunday - no nap, asleep by 7:30 - would have been earlier if dh started earlier, he's a little less cognizant of the time on his nights. Up just after 6.
But night wakings most nights - last night his pull-up had leaked and he was screaming bloody murder I thought he'd fallen out of the bed and injured himself. Nope, just wet clothes. So I'm wondering if he's waking at night when he pees, or the wet pullup is bothering him in the morning?? I bought the night time ones but they only had the 3t/4t size, not the 2t/3t so they are roomy on him. I'm wondering if I should switch back to the regulars in the right size. Or maybe he is just preparing himself to go to the toilet at night when he wakes?
Anyway, he's not even getting 11 hours total most nights. He was ok on the weekend because we can lull about in our pj's and watch tv until he's fully awake, but this morning when it was go go go, he was all whines. And the brutal part about 11 hour nights, aside from the cranky kid?? 13 hour days!!!!! Where he finds the energy, we have no idea.
*Crossing fingers for a nice, calm, big sleeper in #2*
Yawn,
Deb
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Mel,
How are things? Any changes? The time change is coming up for us this weekend and I'm so not looking forward to the REALLY early mornings 4-5 am wake ups!
I don't think I told you how I deal with dd's early wakings. I plop one of the large stuffed animals on the floor (this serves as my pillow), give her some cheerios in a bowl, put some toys next to me and let her play close by until I've gotten a little snooze in. This doesn't always work because there's always bound to be 2/3/4 different things that I need to wake up for (like, change a dirty diaper, spilled cheerios, etc) but somehow time flies and then it's really time for me to wake up. I'm a big grump, though, and I feel so bad for them when I'm in that mood. :( I apologize and try to explain what's going on and I figure, at least, they're realizing that it's good to explain your feelings and, also, that I'm human.
Anyway, I hope things have gotten better in your part of the world. :-*
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Georgia - no change. Am still cranky and sad but trying to just deal as best as we can. Thanks for thinking of us! Good luck with your time change....so glad we don't have that here!
Mel
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Really? I personally think it's ridiculous but only realized this when I had kids. While everyone else gets 1 extra hour of sleep, we moms just get to wake up "earlier" every day. *LOL*
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Parts of Australia have it but not in Brisbane where I am! He was up at 4am today - uuuggghhh. I am so tired.
Mel
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Oh,, Mel, I am sooooooooooooo looking forward to meeting you next week. James is usually between 5:30am-6am which sadly I consider a sleep in :-\. It is his sister Kate (21mths) who is driving me crazy at the moment. She was up at 4:50am today >:( and I layed down with her until 5:20am when she said she need to do wees (she is toilet trained). Once I took her out of the room she said she didn't need to go and wanted to go to the lounge room. :-[. I have been dealing with this for 3yrs now and i think i am passed being angry. I just do it! What makes me really sad is that last night, both kids were asleep by 6:45pm after having 2 very busy days (lots of beach time, outdoors etc) and I fell asleep at 8pm!!!! Perfect time to spend with my darling DH, but I fell asleep. This is what I get upset about. I feel if I am not asleep by 9:30pm, then I won't have enough sleep to deal with the following day.
Anyway, looking forward to meeting you so we can have a good cry together. Maybe we need to meet in the arvo so we can have a wine. :) Anyway, see you next Tuesday. I am so looking forward to meeting someone whose children wake before 6am. Most of my friends kids dont wake until after 7am, which I find most annoying because they complain if they have to get up at 6:30am!!!!
Chat soon
Lisa
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Lisa - I can't wait to meet you guys too! I also sadly consider 6am to be a sleep in. :'( Aidan was pretty good today - 5.45am but played really really quietly till 6.30am (which I have his alarm clock set to!) and Callum slept till 7.20am! So I got to stay in bed (but not sleep ::)) till nearly 7.30am! I am so jealous that your kids are night potty trained! Aidan is STILL in a nappy at night and it is soaked everyday!
I know what you mean about the time in the evening with DH - I fell asleep on the lounge while we tried to catch up with our Hero's episodes we have recorded! And I work night shift at Coles a few times a week so that's even less time together! I don't know about you, but I kinda keep looking forward to the day when they are old enough to get up and be quiet and get there own breakfast without disturbing me - but then I also feel bad, like I am wishing away there child hood. :-\
Anyway, enough tired ramblings from me!!! ;) Can't wait to meet you next week!
Mel
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I don't know about you, but I kinda keep looking forward to the day when they are old enough to get up and be quiet and get there own breakfast without disturbing me - but then I also feel bad, like I am wishing away there child hood. :-\
No, that wish is simply a wish for more sleep. You're only human, despite the fact that everyone in our families make us feel otherwise (wonder woman).
I hope you two enjoy meeting up with each other! Make sure to post photos afterwards!
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Yep, I too, look forward to the day where they can get their own breakfast. Mine aren't night toilet trained, just during the day. Kate does wake up with a dry nappy on occasion, but James I think will be close to 5 before he stops wearing a nappy at night. He is a very big wetter at night. Often goes through 2 Huggies nappies ::)
glad you got a sleep in this morning. I think what makes me cranky is that I am always awake at 5am but it is that I HAVE TO get up as opposed to getting up when I want to. :-\ Probably sounds very selfish of me.... :-[
Anyway, both are still asleep from their day naps. James doesn't nap very often during the day so I take it when I can.
Chat soon
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Mel, I totally feel for you. Hugs to you and all of you who have early wakers. We do too. DD (almost 19 months) rarely sleeps past 7am. It use to be 6:30 and now, for the past 4 weeks it's been between 5:30-6. Today she woke at 5:15am. Needless to say, I am very tired. I totally do not understand her sleep inconsistency. Nap is the same way. Some days she'll sleep 45 minutes, other days an hour, and, yet, other days 1.5 hours...rarely more. I am frustrated and can't figure out if she's ot or ut. Over the weekend we did a later bedtime - in bed at about 7:30pm and sleeping around 7:45 or so. She did sleep till 7am. But last night we did the same thing (maybe just slightly earlier b/c she has a cold now) and she was up at 5:15. Grrr! I thought she would 'sleep in' b/c she's a little sick and needs the sleep. But no, she didn't.
It's so hard b/c when she she gets up so early, nap is messed up. She wants to sleep by 10:30 or so and that's way too early. But I suppose if she gets an early bedtime tonight I can try for the 10:30 nap. I don't know. I'm at a loss. I 'think' she is getting her 2 year molars and I'd love to blame her ew's on that, but it's so hard to tell. I only wish I could get her on a 12 hour schedule but she's never been that type of kid. I do think she must be ot b/c she's only getting about 11.5 total a day and she's 18.5 months old. I think she needs another good 1.5 in there somewhere. Hmm....so frustrating!!
I'd love to hear other ideas/thoughts too from anyone. Keep me updated with your progress!