BabyWhispererForums.com
SLEEP => Night Wakings => Topic started by: my3girlsjde on February 19, 2011, 19:51:23 pm
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First off, we've almost sorted the twins' sleep issues :D Dh is up there anyhow and I've moved downstairs with E while I battle my double ear infection and try to keep her from waking the other girls.
Daytime is great. She really is an angel baby :) She sttn from 6 days until 6 weeks when we had some health problems and I was advised to feed to sleep by my Dr and LC to get her growing. It worked but now I'm working on adjusting that. She's taken to the adjustment no problem. Any time she woke at night, I was advised to give her a feed to get the extra calories into her, which I did, knowing what I was creating.
Our EASY is all over the place due to her nights all over the place, but she happily takes long naps that I need to wake her from. She gets rocked until drowsy, sometimes falls asleep but she does wake those times when I lay her down. She smiles at me or just looks for her paci and then goes to sleep. She's doing approx 3hrs 15 - 3hrs 30 A time and usually goes down no problem. I think if I could ditch this NF issue she really would sttn quite well. At this point, I'd happily take 5am EW's lol.
She's medicated for reflux and has had several bugs so I've given her the comfort nurse to get her through. She's now over her bug and the reflux is at bay for now so I'm thinking this is the time to do it. Once my ear infection clears up I'll be ready to go. I'm hoping in the next couple of days. I know she can get through on little to no feeds as she's only comfort sucking after 8pm. Many nights I fall asleep with her on the nursing pillow and me sitting up, and she happily sleeps there for 3 hours. Her nw's are completely random but she rarely goes more than 3 hrs anymore. We have a BIG prop. It's nothing to have 5 plus nw's between 7pm and 7am. She has a paci that she uses to go to sleep but during the night, it's the boob she really wants.
Dh would be no good at this, and it needs to be me as she's going through quite a bit of SA and I don't want her feeling abandoned on top of this huge change. He's dealing with the twins' nw's and I'm not getting involved as I need to focus on this. I'm horrible at pu/pd, so I need some advice before tackling this monster. Shh-pat has helped get her back to sleep once in a while but not consistently.
Any and all advice will be welcome. Hand holding too :)
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Just went through this so here for lots of hand holding. Have you seen my thread? It's in NWings.
Good luck, it is possible! It's seems scarier than it really is, and the first night is the worst. But if you get through the first one, then it's all downhill from there. ;)
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Big hugs. This can be so tough! When we finally pushed Austin to drop the last NF I did PUPD for 3 nights (first one was the worst, basically up most of the night, but dropped significantly by the 2nd night and the 3rd night was really short) and that was that. Tough work but it was over quickly. You can do it! :D
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Got no advice hun but here for hand holding. You will do this no problem, if you can deal with those spirited twins you can deal with your angel LO! Good luck. :-*
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Thanks everyone :D
Martina I just read through your entire thread and you give me hope.
I meant to add that I don't think the rocking is a prop. It's part of our routine and more for me than her. I didn't get so many cuddles with my big girls so I'm monopolizing them with E. ;)
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Just following along for inspiration...although the night feeds are the least of my issues atm ::).
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OK so we went from 1210am - 620am without feeds ;D
I hadn't planned on it starting last night but I was so exhausted, and feeling so horrible that I brought her to bed with me. Then I lay there thinking: "well, if I'm giving her this, then we can work on getting the NF's down seeing that I'm not going anywhere" So we cuddled, she cried a bit (not nearly what I thought she would) and took her paci every time she woke.
I was so rested this morning! I'd say if it goes that well every night, it might be worth going at it like this. There's no doubt in my mind that the feeding is for comfort.
Back later but wondering what the worse of two evils are. I can get rest and break the nf's if she's in bed with me, but then I have a whole other elephant to contend with. I need the rest desperately to get better and have two other lo's to contend with during the day.
Anyone break the co-sleeping habit? I don't want it but really at this point, we're all getting more sleep and the way I've been getting sick it may have happened anyhow.
So torn, yet so rested lol.
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Glad you got some rest. :)
I guess the question is, do you see yourself co-sleeping for awhile, or is it appealing right now because it's working? What if it's not something that works for you in a few weeks or months, etc.? I know for me co-sleeping is not something I can do, I just don't sleep well. I also don't want to have to break that habit later on down the road. With T we used to let him in our bed sometimes, especially when I was really desperate for sleep, and then we realized as he got older and realized it's what he wanted, it got harder to get him into his bed. So we put a stop to that. :P
It's really what works for you and what you're comfortable with. In my mind, you're just trading one thing for another, kwim? Breaking co-sleeping will be no easier than breaking NFs, and it will definitely be harder the longer you let it happen and the more she gets used to it. BUT if it's something you are prepared to do for awhile and deal with at a later time, then it's always great to get some much needed rest. ;)
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Good point :)
Going to go with it for now, as I'm just too sick and my ears hurt way too much to be standing over a crib. I wish I could as I *know* how this is supposed to work, it's just not feasible for me right now.
I don't mid it as of right now, and I don't plan on letting it happen for long. But co-sleeping is waaaaaaay more preferable to the nf's.
On a great note: for her first nap today I got her mildly drowsy and she put herself to sleep right away. I know the other naps were harder but with that great night of sleep everything seems a little more manageable today.
Going to keep up with weaning the nf's. We went 6 hrs last night so I know she doesn't need anything from midnight to 6am at least. I'll see if I can push it back tonight.
Fingers crossed!
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Good luck!! You'll get there soon. :)
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Here for support as well.
This is something I need to do as well - just waiting for a tooth to pop in first so she starts eating solids again.
Although I do wonder if it is the right thing or not still - but she is waking after only 3-4 hrs for her first feed now >:(. I think we might be in learned hunger territory rather than major habit territory.
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Same here Liz. I fed last night at 11 and now at 5. Massive improvement actually lol.
Well, my ears felt a lot better so I went for it yesterday. Shh/pat in the crib, no more than 5 mins rocking and def not drowsy. It took about 45 mins for second nap and bt but it worked!
She stayed in her bed all night (no co-sleeping)
I fed at 11 when she woke (she never sleeps through until 11) as a df which I'll wean and now at 5 as I'm pretty full. She woke at 1 and 3 and 10 mins tops of shh/pat got her back down ;D This is a HUGE inprovement!!!
She's pretty chatty now, so I'm hoping thos doesn't become her new EW time. I'll try to push this feed later and then wean the 11pm one I think.
Great night! Thanks for the hand holding, it's getting better quickly :D
She did bite me at the end of the feed >:( and then laughed when I yelped. Hopefully that's not a new routine lol.
Thanks again for the hand holding. I'll report back tonight again.
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Quick question:
If she's chatting away in her bed, but not upset, I let her be right?
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In theory, yes let her be. Even if you have to go in there eventually, she's still getting used to spending that time alone in her crib, kwim?
It sounds like we've all really been in the same boat. Up until I decided to take the initiative, F was really feeding every 3-4hrs around the clock too, and I know it was learned hunger. But that is undone really fast when you finally decided to tackle it.
Sounds like you are making progress though, and it's only been a few days! So really it doesn't take long once th eball is rolling!! ;)
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She's getting the idea anyhow :)
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Well, last night she went 8 hours between feeds :D I'm adjusting well, and not as engorged as the night before. Something tells me that this is going to trigger the return of AF ::)
We had a NW at 9pm (easily settled), the DF at 10pm and then nothing until 1am. She settled and stirred again at 330. It might have had something to do with the fact that I had fallen asleep in the kitchen chair sitting next to her as I shush patted and I was probably snoring :o. She settled easily and then nothing until 630am!!! So definitely getting much better. If I can get that 630 to move to 7, I'll have nothing to complain about in the EW department at all and just phase out the DF. Hopefully a few more days will really show some good changes.
Oh, and at BT last night she had done an A time of almost 4 hours and I thought I'd be dealing with some massive OT but I laid her down and she didn't budge. I waited a second and looked and her eyes were closed. I quickly left the room and didn't look back lol. I'm thinking it was a fluke but wouldn't it be great if every BT went like that? I could only be so lucky.
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Woohoo!! Keep it up! :)
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Very jealous Vicki :) :-*.
Looks as though M is going to pop her tooth very soon now, and then I might be in a position to tackle this. Can't risk engorgement either ATM with the state of my boob >:(.
You are doing SO well :-* :-* :-*
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You'll get there Liz :-*
I'll report again tomorrow :) Hopefully will be a good report.
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You are doing so well Vicki!. I think I will be taking the plunge at bt tonight so your post is giving me a boost. Have to say I am a little apprehensive at the moment....
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You can do it!!! Let me know how you make out :)
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Ugh, well I was going back and forth between a more gentle, Pantley-type approach which is what I had been trying a few weeks ago, and full on pu/pd with all the crying etc. After talking with dh we easily convinced me to take the gentler approach. I wouldn't say it was a huge success tonight. Part of the problem was that he didn't nurse very well and had lots of burps to get out. I did get him down in his crib in a very drowsy state (eyes opened as I carried him there) but he woke after 5 minutes of sleep and was not happy. Anyway I guess I would consider it a bust. I find I am always second guessing myself thinking he still has burps, is still hungry or bothered by something I have to fix before he will settle down. It makes it so easy for me to throw in the towel. :P
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I did the pantley but it still left me cuddling her to sleep and that was another prop. Shush-pat involves a bit more 'drama' but it's faster and you're still there comforting them kwim? She doesn't get hysterical thankfully, just moans and cries a bit kind of like: "ummm, Mummy this isn't fair." It's going much better than I thought it would.
However.........
Last night we had NW's at 9pm, 1040pm (did the DF), 1am, 3am, 4am (1hr) and then she slept through until 650am. So positive note is we're going longer between feeds. That was a full 8 hours and the first time she had ever gone that long between feeds so that so far is do-able.
Negative? Good Lord how many times is this kid gonna wake up ???! I'm beat this morning but I'll keep at it. Most of the settling is getting faster and I quit doing the shust pat and it's turned into pd as she's trying to get up. Just a quick back rub when I put her down and a shush and she's going to sleep without the pat.
I'm thinking with all of that, me being in there is going to be needed and this will turn into a gradual withdrawl from her when I put her down. And I'm fine with that. I'm a huge fan of GW as it worked so well with my twins after regaining their trust. So if that's where we end up with this then I know how it works and I'd just rather get to that point quickly kwim?
Fingers crossed for longer stretches tonight ::)
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Well my instincts were right at least last night. DS woke constantly but had a fever (think he's caught his brother's cold). He spent much of the night in our arms as he couldn't seem to get into deep sleep. I guess my training will have to be put on hold again. But I hear you about the consequence of Pantley - basically ds is currently being cuddled to sleep. I KNOW ssh/pat or pu/pd will be necessary.
Hope you have a better night tonight as well. At the very least she's getting used to waking and not getting a feed.
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Yay Vicki you are doing so well, that is great. I know the NWs must be awful but at least you are not feeding and managing to settle her. As for your easy BT of just putting her down and she fell asleep... oh what I wouldn't give for that every night, in fact ANY night! Well we can dream I guess. lol
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Lol - I'd give a lot to have that too on a regular basis.
Last night there was a lot of fooling aroung in her crib and some fussing while I did pd but not too bad. She had a mucousy bloody diaper today so not sure if that'll throw a wrench into her sleeping tonight.
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A little busy with a poorly baby atm, but still here to cheer you on! ;) :-*
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Thanks Martina :)
Hope he's better soon.
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OMG she slept from 1130 - 450am!!!! It's been months since that's happened. My body actually screamed in pain from staying in one position for so long lol.
BT was a giggle fest for her and she tried to get up so a little bit of pd until she grabbed my finger and got drowsy. I think I may need a lovey. She used to hold my finger when I rocked her and I'm going to try to find something to replace it. Suggestions welcome :) I've quit the shush/pat as it knocks her out but was becoming a prop. I only use it now if she cries and that's pretty rare. It's like she knows what to do now when she's laid down, she just needs a bit of help to do it :)
I must say the 'angel' is really showing itself now ;D
So I fed at 11ish when she woke (she'd woke around 930 previously but settled for dh - which is also new :D) and she went down with one pd and a 30 second back rub. And then nothing until 450am. Not a peep! She wasn't settling so I fed her and I was scared it was going to be an ew :o. It took until 615 of her babbling and a couple of pd's for her to go back to sleep. The girls woke her at 730. Not sure how long she would have slept otherwise.
So GREAT night!!! She had a bath and not sure if that made much of a difference, but I'll keep note of the next noght she baths as it's only twice per week for her skin.
She had a nasty diaper yesterday and I thought it might throw her off but it didn't. Perhaps the night before. Have to keep an eye on it.
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Yay yay yay!! It pays off to persist! Good job you. :)
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So happy for you and your babe! ;D ;D
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Last night was even better. She woke once around 930ish and then stirred when I went to bed at 1130. She then slept through until 2am :o (5hrs) and then a short feed and down again until 6am (4hrs). She's NEVER done two long stretches in a row. She then went back down after a feed until 730am. So I'm getting a 12 hour night now averaging only 3-4 nw's.
If I can do the same tonight, I'll try not to feed her as last night I did because she missed the df and see where that gets us. Maybe we don't need it? We'll see! Fingers crossed.
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Great progress! Hope tonight goes well for you...
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Yay! You're doing it, way to go!! :D
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We had one, ONE nw at 2am! Soother replug and pat on the back and that was it!
She was asleep by 750pm and I just fed her at 6am. My boobs were cannon balls so I fed. I think she may have otherwise gone back to sleep. She got a little active during the feed so I'm cuddling her back to sleep so I can grab a few extra winks.
I could get used to this ;D
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Wow that is awesome! You are definitely on your way! Just curious, what were the naps like yesterday?
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She's always been a great napper so 2.5 hrs for the first and then a 45 catnap before supper.
Today it was a 3 hour nap and she catnapped right away in the van when we took the girls out for the afternoon.
I think this kid might actually be a 'sleeper'!
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Ugh..... food reaction yeserday and unsettled night :(
She went down pretty unsettled at 8pm and was up by 830pm. She wouldn't settle so she came out to hang out with dh while I went night grocery shopping. She fell asleep in his arms watching tv and was pretty unsettled sleeping until she woke herself at 4am. She was up until 5 and I'm not sure if she just wanted the comfort of the feed due to an upset belly but I got her back down by 5am. Up again at 630 and at that point she came to bed with me for an hour while I dozed. I treat reactions as illness so I think she could use the extra cuddle.
She's better today so back at it.
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Hang in there! Hopefully tonight you can get back on track. :)
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So here's the latest update:
We're all sick again :( We'd done so well with the shush-pat and now we all got a bug. So now E can't keep the soother in her mouth to fall asleep and wakes up coughing so the shush-pat went out the window and she's now nursing at night again and being cuddled to sleep too. Soooooo discouraged :(
I know I did it once and we'll get it back, but to get that week of one or two nw's for a soother re-plug and back to this is taking the wind out of my sails.
We're also hitting the 45 min nap monster. I've been able to shush pat her back down once or twice but my 3 hour once a day napper has turned into the 45 min catnapper. My gut tells me that this is developmental and she's ready for an extension of her A time.
For the past month, our EASY used to look like this:
E 730am
A 730-1030am
E 900am
S 1030am - 130pm
E 145pm
A 130pm - 430pm
E 300pm
S 430pm (catnap)
E 515pm
A 515pm - 7pm
E 7pm (bt feed)
S 7pm (bt)
She is on the high end of sleep needs (bless her). But I think she's developed away from that and I'd like to keep the one 3 hour nap a day if possible. I think maybe dropping the catnap may be in order. Not really sure how to tackle this but I think major changes will have to wait until she's feeling better.
She was up coughing every 20 mins last night after 3am so she ended up in bed with me. I really don't think she 'likes' co-sleeping anymore which is great, but it's nice if she's really unsettled so I can at least doze.
Thoughts on how to tackle this?
I know this is turning into a bit of an EASY issue, but it's affecting the NW's. Should I be posting on EASY?
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Just a quick update:
After I posted that, I shush-patted her down from awake and crying after a 3hr 45 min A time. She keeps coughing so I'm not sure how long she'll stay down.
I know in my gut that if she weren't sick, her EASY would be the most likely culprit of her NW's. I'm feeding her now at NW's as she's in hysterics and in my mind she needs whatever rest she can get as well as the extra fluids to get this bug out of her system. I'm just hoping I didn't get myself into a mess again.
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(((hugs))) Vicki, sucks when you make progress then they get sick. :(
It's hard to sort through it all when she is out of sorts. I do think she is ready for more A time, but I think until she is feeling better you're going to get mixed results with anything you try, kwim?
I am no good with EASY stuff. :P So post on EASY if you think it would help.
We are still working to get back on track after illness. If it's not one thing it's another. ::)
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Seriously though eh? It's like either me or her or both of us can't catch a break :(
I rocked her after she woke up 20 mins into her last nap with coughing. She went down after 1hr and 30 mins of rocking and she want a happy camper. I gave her her puffer so she could breathe better but forgot how hyper it can make her ::) I think I'll try to keep her comfortable and get her through this bug and tackle it again. The nf's must help woth extra fluids so I'll do them on demand. Hopefully I don't create a bad habit, but as proven before it can be broken.
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Well the nf's are done with. We had our last one a week ago and go figure AF showed up two days ago ::)
She's over her bug but now teething ::) the teeth are almost through and the sa so were getting ready to tackle the nw's. Slipping back into the co-sleeping but it's saving my sanity while the teeth are aggrivating her. Pu/pd had her in hysterics so I'm thinking of gradual withdrawl. Sometimes she settles right in the crib with a paci plug in but it's rare. Especially with the teething.
So when I get ready to give this a good shot again I'll get a new thread started.
Thanks for all the hand holding for dropping the nf's. We finally did it :D. Much less gassy lo throughout the night too btw.
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That's great Vicki! It's that gassiness that has me thinking...I know it's one of our problems at night and it seems to get worse as the night progresses.
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The gas is almost non-existant now. It's amazing. Also helps with the reflux in her case.
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Vicki that is great news, well done to you. I am in the process of trying GW but it is going a bit too slowly! I will keep an eye out if you start a new thread as I will be interested to see how you get on. No sleep training seems to work for C, as she doesn't seem to behave as normal babies do!! lol. She doesn't really cry with it just plays in the cot! Hmmmm. I am sure this and our current NW are EASY related too though. Good luck hun and well done again.