BabyWhispererForums.com
SLEEP => Sleeping For Toddlers => Topic started by: *Becky* on December 03, 2012, 13:21:08 pm
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M is 18 months and we have pretty much been on 1 nap for about 3 weeks. She has done about 2 good naps and maybe another 2 more that were ok but the majority are anything from 1-1.20 and it is getting me down as we then have to do a ridiculously early BT.
Where am I going wrong??
Wake up is anytime from 5.45-7am depending on whether she has a NWing around 4.30am or not. Most of the time we try to keep nap to 11.30-12pm, a touch earlier if she has been up at 5.45am. I can't figure it out at all and need help. She was a good napper on 2 naps so it is not that she is just a bad napper.
Yesterday she had to do 2 naps as we were out and they were very short as she does not nap well out and about so she had an EBT and slept 12.15 which is amazing but again we get a bad nap. I wonder if i am pushing her too far in the am but surely after a good night she should be able to handle it?? I never push her over 5.5 hours and sometimes more like 5. I am just getting frustrated.
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I wonder if i am pushing her too far in the am but surely after a good night she should be able to handle it??
I think this is the thing - it feels like she 'should' be able to handle it, but the short naps are perhaps saying that she can't :-\. Not really sure what the answer is though otherwise E would be sleeping better :P ::)
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I guess all I can do is pull back to 5 hours A and see....she did fall asleep in the car after 5 hours so maybe that is where she is at. She just HAS to do a good nap if she goes down after 5 hours or BT is a long way off yk?
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Oh yes I know it only too well! Could you try a 5 hour tomorrow and just see if it helps?
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will do x
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I have no useful advice but thought I would drop off some hugs as we have somehow reached the point where 45 minutes is a long nap. I managed to ap a nearly 2h nap today, but I think that was just because he has reached total exhaustion - generally he is pretty resistant to ap as well - but I'm hoping that it might help him reset a bit m
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I WISH I could AP here, it is SO frustrating but she will not have it and I have tried and tried.
Uggh, it is horrid isn't it. I had forgotten this stage...although I am sure H got it more quickly than M!!
Another early BT...sigh....
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she did a good night but up at 5.50am so doing 5 hours A is so tricky, I just really feel we will end up with a 5pm BT or something and I do find that very difficult. She is clearly not that OT or we would be having lots more issues but she just won't take a decent nap....
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Have you tried w2s with her Becky? I've not tried it for ages with e, but if you are consistently getting short naps then you've not got much to lose :-\.
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No...I will do the next time H is at pre school. It is bad enough as it is with me asking him to be quiet all the time, I just don't think I can spend that long in her room tbh.
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am wondering if I should just be very rigid and set times for good...she should handle it but I know she won't if that makes any sense. I just can't do 6pm BT's forever.
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another 1.15. yawn.
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Does it make you feel any better to hear that ev took another 20 minute nap for the second day in a row :P ;)
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oh claire - was that her am or pm nap??
What is it with these girls??
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that was the nap that I started settling her for at 10am today and where she finally fell asleep at 1.45pm :o (got her up for 15 minutes to give her lunch at one point)...and then woke 17 minutes later :(!
Hope little miss Martha pulls off a good night :-*
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OMG hun, that is so tough....I think I could only cope with 1 nap a day in that case!!
Hugs xx
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ok so asleep for 6 and awake just before 5.45am. So yes a great night but in all honesty it gets us nowhere and we are still getting up pre 6am. I really need to formulate a plan here as every day is going to be so hard if she is up at this time. I can't do BT earlier than 6pm and tbh it seems like 6pm has become the norm which I did not really want it to. Does anyone have any ideas......I know she will not nap well again today and it just goes on and on. I feel disheartened and I need to come up with a plan.
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Hugs, becky. I don't think I have any suggestions - I have come to the conclusion that I would rather have the early wake up (I have to get up at 6.20 anyway) and the early bedtime to give me some time with the girls and a decent evening. Would looking at it that way help at all?
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(((Hugs))) Becky, have been reading along (hope you don't mind) as we're dealing with 2-1 here too, albeit at a younger age. I just wonder if perhaps she needs longer am A time than you're giving her credit for? Perhaps even as much as 6h? I know anything under 2h is generally thought to be OT on one nap, but considering her age and with such good nights I wonder if actually you're getting UT naps?
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Hi Hun, this type of situation is why I favour set A times rather than set nap. IIWM I would start by trying 5 hours after WU and do it for at least 3 days and see where it gets you. If it doesn't helo I would add 15 mins every few days until you're at 6 hours A time and then you will see if she truly is OT or UT due to the longer nights. The problem I often find is that, you don't want to PD for nap too early in case of short naps but if you push too far short naps is exactly what you get. So an earlier nap will often result in a longer nap and a similar WU time except obviously the longer nap makes for a better BT which is what moves you forward to getting a set WU and a set nap. I know many others that would advise sticking with the set nap and that MR will eventually adjust, and they are probably right, but for us set A times reigned supreme every time.
Does she still seem OT despite the longer nights ???
I hope this is helpful Sweetie. Pretty much every move takes a leap of faith and an earlier nap is a X'd fingers move just as EBT is, but worth a short IMHO.
(Hugs Lovely)
x.
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thanks....5.40am today after 6.15pm BT.
I can't do 5 hours this am as have to take H out and really can't sacrifice the only 2 mornings he spends with me in the week atm but tomorrow I will and I will do it for 3 days Vicki.
All I want is a post 6am wake up and for her to be rested. If that means a 1.15 nap then that is fine but pre 6am wake ups are not. I am so grotty and irritable when I have to get out of bed at that time.
I lie on the sofa with her but she never goes back to sleep, just yawns and chats.
I find it very hard to say if she is OT or not as she is good at hiding it if she is. She probably is but goes to bed fine and no NWings. She used to do short nights and longer naps, now she has switched that so longer night, short nap but the total amount of sleep she is getting is thr same i.e. 12.45 max.
Thanks everyone, just feel totally fed up. I am surrounded by people whose kids nap at 12 for 2 hours plus and go to bed at what I consider a normal time i.e. 7/7.30pm. I want that!!!!
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clare - what time does x go to bed and w/u? Have his naps improved?
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She used to do short nights and longer naps, now she has switched that so longer night, short nap but the total amount of sleep she is getting is thr same i.e. 12.45 max.
Becky now that I know this ^ I do wonder more about UT than OT. And possibly pushing the nap out IS the way to go. As a rule how long has her A time been if the nap is 11.30/12.00 ??? Is it close to 6 hours anyway or not ??? How long has her A time to bed been ??? Is there any way you could start pushing the nap out by 5 mins at a time and BT the same, so you slowly push the day forward and hopefully the night ??? If you do it slowly it shouldn't have any radical adverse effects, I have seen it work for others but it would take a couple of weeks.
Sorry to contradict myself already, I didn't realise she was clocking up her average sleep needs.
What's your gut tell you ???
x.
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It is awful but I just don't know atm....she has always confused me. I have struggled with her EWings forever so it is hard to tell.
She has been having about 5.5 to nap recently so up around 6am ish and nap at 11.30am. Yesterday she was up at 5.45am and she napped 11.25am - she did sleep slightly longer i.e. woke at about 12.50pm crying but for the first time I resettled her but only for about 5-10 mins!! I can never normally resettle her...ever so that would say UT to me but who really knows!
Today she will nap after 5.45 A time as it just can't be any earlier.
I like the idea of UT much better tbh!! If she is OT at 18 months on 5.5 A time after a good night I think we are in BIG trouble!!
One thing I do know is she seems to like a shorter pm A time - she would easily go down after as little as 4 hours, sometimes less.
I will report back soon xx
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Well that all points to the latter being a good plan rather than the earlier nap Becky, don't you think ??? It will be interesting to see how long she naps today after 5.45 A time. I would also keep an eye on her settling times to give you clues.
Sam woke at 5.30 am for a long time at her age and then 6 am for a long time. I don't even know if it exclusively routine related Hun, rather than age related YK ??? for some LO's anyway :-\
x.
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I am kind of ok with her waking early if she has gone to bed at a reasonable time but i always have in my head 'what do you expect' when she goes to bed at 6/6.15pm - iykwim. I was really annoyed with her this am but it is not her fault, she did a great night, I just need to get a more reliable routine going and a later BT...not much later but at least 6.30pm earliest with a view to getting to 7/7.15pm. She must be fairly low sleep needs as she has done 12.45 for ages, sometimes 12.5 but a low sleep needs kid on a 2 nap routine until 18 months seems odd yk??
Will come back to you after the nap xx
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I think when they've been on such a short am nap (20 mins just tides them over rather than anything else obviously) then when they make the switch to one nap quite late then they can probably handle pretty long morning iyswim?
So perhaps that will be the key? She doesn't seem generally ot because of her great nights. X
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He goes to bed at about 6.15 and gets up at 6. He had a better nap yesterday, so we will see if he can do it again today - I hesitate to say they have improved!
Just to back up what Claire said - the girls both went to one nap pretty late (18 months +) and I never had to move the middle of the day nap, so they went to a long morning a straight away when they went down to one nap.
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she did 1.5 today. Asleep for 11.30 and woke at 1pm....thing is that is neither really short for an early night or a good nap for a later one so we are just stuck yk? I can add 10 mins onto her A time tomorrow so she is doing 6 hours but hardly think that is going to give us a 2 hour nap.
1.5 is fine but she needs a later BT then as if she is only going to do 12.45 that means a 5.30am start with a 6.15pm BT which is what I was going to do today.
Aaaagh! Help/ideas appreciated....
bx
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wow clare - awesome nights!!! See all I want is a 6am or later wake up x
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If you read my post carefully you will see that he GETS up at 6... :P It is unusual that we don't have to go to him during the night, and even if we don't then normally he needs one of us in his room from 5/5.15, although he does generally go back to sleep once one of us is in there.
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oh ok, sorry.....thought X was going to the to[ of the class for a minute ;)
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yesterday was
A - 5.40am
Nap - 11.30-1pm
BT - 6.15pm
we had a NWing at 2.15am for about 15 mins and then up at 5.45am. Yawn.
Any thoughts?
Do I keep with the 5.45A time or pull right back to 5? I do think she is probably OT but I find it hard to see what to do atm. I just want to feel like we are moving forward.
Push BT or keep where it is?
Help!
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I do think she must be tired, it is just how much we push through and how much we pull back yk? I want to do 2 naps today but I can hear Vicki shouting No!!!!! :) :)
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anyone??
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we did another 11.30am nap. She does not seem tired at all but that is both mine, they would never show tired signs. Drowsy - ha ha, what is that??
I somehow need to push BT back without her getting OT which is going to be tricky. Plan anyone? Anyone BTDT?
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I shall step aside and let the other ladies offer advice (we've had 20, 20, 30, 30 minute naps for the past four days ::)), and I shall just offer a hug :-*
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Your day yesterday looks almost the same as ours, although x napped 12-1.30. His nw was at 11.30, went straight back to sleep once I went in and laid down on the mattress and then he woke at about 5.45 this morning. I have to say that I would be happy with that day (minus the nw) so I am trying to recreate it!
How consistent is she? If she will do exactly the same day for 3 days, then I think you should try that then push her nap by 15 minutes and bt as well for 3 days, then push again to see if that can shift her day. It doesn't work with x because he doesn't do the same thing 2 days running, but if m will then that might be your best bet for moving bt.
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It doesn't work with x because he doesn't do the same thing 2 days running, but if m will then that might be your best bet for moving bt.
she is a bit more consistent than H was so it might work.
Thanks clare.....xx
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we got 1.20 for the nap but think I will just stick to 6.15pm BT as at least we are then being consistent. Will see if she how the night is.
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Hi Becky. I won't be much help but will offer an observation since it seems we are in similar situations.
Our son is doing a bit longer than yours with naps it seems but your lo seems to be going back to sleep after her nws where our son has had two looooong nws without settling back until its almost time to wake for the day. Maybe for a lot of babies this switch in routine really messes with them especially if they were in a good routine for so long and it just takes god knows how long before they reset.
Not much help but I feel your frustration!
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I want to do 2 naps today but I can hear Vicki shouting No!!!!!
LOL you know me too well Honeybun.
1.5 nap is good following a good night. IIWM I would go with the plan of shifting nap and BT by 5 mins at a time over 3 days or so, so that you haven't made any sudden moves on her, but you will hopefully be able to move that WU that way. I wouldn't go past 6 hours before nap, so once you were there I'd stick (if you aren't already) but try shifting BT slowly but surely.
x.
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Ahhh Becky, not much to offer you but (((hugs))) hon. I'm following along because I know we will be right with you, oh so soon! ;) :P I think the plan of pushing gently is a good one. Your day really isn't bad, it's just happening at the wrong times. :-\
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Your day really isn't bad, it's just happening at the wrong times.
one day I will wake up later than 5.30am - right???
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Well, I hope so... and I'm hoping for the same thing for myself. :P I never thought 6am would sound so good! ::) ::)
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one day I will wake up later than 5.30am - right???
No WRONG! Your children will but you will be awake waiting for them to wake you! LOL JUST KIDDING!!!!!!!!! :-* ish.x.
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like today - ha ha!!
Heard her cry out at 4.55am and lay there until she did wake at 6.05am.......silly mummy.
Good night.
So do we just continue with 11.30am set nap then and work on slowly pushing BT back by 5 mins every 3 days? Does that sound right vicki?
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So do we just continue with 11.30am set nap then and work on slowly pushing BT back by 5 mins every 3 days? Does that sound right vicki?
If the main focus is on shifting BT then that sounds good to me Becky. As long as she does a 1.5 nap you should be okay and make it to a 7.00 BT, then if she keeps sleeping long nights that would be the jackpot of a 7 am WU. Remind me, how is she at BT ??? settling quickly or seeming OT ??? what has her last A time been as a rule ???
x.
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she has been settling straight away at BT - she is generally always like this. Nap is settling within about 5 mins.
Her last A the last couple of days has been about 5.15 A and I am sticking to no earlier than 6.15pm whatever the nap tbh (unless it was 30 mins or something)
I don't think 12 hour nights will be the norm. Her nap yesterday was only 1.20 and they generally are 1.15/20 which is why we are getting the longer nights.
I would like to think we could do a 7pm-6.30am routine - that would be ideal but I would be fine with a 6am reliable wake up too.
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she has been settling straight away at BT - she is generally always like this. Nap is settling within about 5 mins.
Honestly Becky this is great ^. So what's her first A time ??? is there room for it to be pushed out very slowly too to see if the nap extends ???
x.
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the last few days it has been about 5.45 A in the am. Today it will be more like 5.5.
I could push to 6 hours??
I am a bit wary of pushing anymore as that seems quite a long A tbh but I guess it is possible she needs 6. WDYT?
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I would hold at 5.45 for a week or so and push BT very slowly 5 mins at a time.x.
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will do x
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today
A - 6am
Nap - 11.45-1.15pm
BT - 6.30pm
So working on 5.45 before nap and 5.15 after with a 12.5 hour day.
She is teething bless her so may explain the shorter naps. We had crying meltdowns all am but much better this pm after calpol!! Having said that if she does a long night then nap is probably going to be shorter. A 1.5 nap with BT pushed to 7pm and a longer night would be perfect :)
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Not bad Hun, hope the night is good.x.
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sounds great!
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awake at 5.15am. Have no idea what to do with her.
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awake at 5.15am. Have no idea what to do with her.
I'd go with 11 am nap which is 5.45 to nap again, then take if from there. If her nap isn't long you don't have much choice but to push her further tonight Hun.
(Hugs)
x.
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ok. Am out today and DH in charge. He really wants to do 2 naps but I don't think she will go down for 2 now anyway so will let him know the plan.
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DH in charge. He really wants to do 2 naps
Hmm tricky, I love those disputes so much. I hope whatever happens it works out Hun. I'm jealous that you're out on your own today LOL, I could seriously do with some of that ;)
x.
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he did 11am nap and she slept 2 hours....he thinks. Heard a cry after 1.25 but she was then quiet until 1pm.
I do think we are in a bit of an OT/UT loop. She handled the A time to the nap fine after the short night and thinking about it night before last was a great night, then 1.5 nap yesterday so way over the normal amount of sleep she usually gets.
I think BT needs pushing back and nap really but think we will focus on BT first...set at 6.30pm and then aim to be at 7pm within a couple of weeks. That will allow for some shorter nights.
Plan?
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That sounds like a plan to me Hun. It is quite conclusive that she slept a 2 hour nap after shorter night, I honestly think she is getting enough sleep, but it just needs re-arranging a little. Chin up, remember how much worse things were not so long ago.
x.
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how long do you think we should keep to 6.30pm BT and can we move by 15 mins or does it have to be 5 min increments? I just know she is not consistent yk so trying to move things tiny bit by tiny bit may end up being very frustrating!
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Honestly Hun, IIW Sam I would make a straight jump to the desired BT, but I know he would handle it. IMHO because things are better now than they have been in sometimes, IIWY I would be worried to make any sudden moves on her and nudge by 5 mins at a time. But you know her best, if you think she can handle it then just go for it! x.
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IMHO because things are better now than they have been in sometimes, IIWY I would be worried to make any sudden moves on her and nudge by 5 mins at a time.
I would say the same x
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no probs, will go 5 mins every 3 days. Going to do 6.30pm for a few nights anyway before we do anything.IMHO because things are better now than they have been in sometimes
in what way? I feel like the 5.145am start today was worse than ever...normally she goes back to sleep if she wakes THAT early....
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not good....crying after being in bed an hour. That MUST be OT.
Jeez, help us though this. I actually cannot formulate a plan anymore, I feel we are just floundering.
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Hi Sweetie,
Honey I think you are most probably exhausted and finding it difficult to see any positives right now. Just a few short weeks ago a 1 nap routine was seemingly out of reach and for a long time you had no definite plan and MR had no consistent routine, and now she has. You are a Mother of 2 very little one's and as the Mammy of only 1 I can only imagine how hard that is. But honestly Hun, from an outsider looking in having followed MR's progress, I would say she is firmly on 1 nap right now. I know you want the WU later, of course you do, those early mornings are so harsh, but hand on heart I'm not sure I would try shifting anything right now. I wouldn't leave it as is forever, but if she is, as you say clocking up her maximum sleep as a rule, then maybe changing things up right now could backfire.
WRT the early start today, it happens to us all, yes she is probably OT but one bad day does not a disaster make ;) Just stick with 5.45 in the morning and EBT. Every day MR is resetting that clock just a tad more and I believe things will get better from here not worse. Just take a step back, take a deep breathe and give yourself some credit for how far she has come thanks to you coming out the other side of a very difficult and challenging time :-*
A (BIG HUG) from me. I hope you can see there is light shining brightly at the end of the tunnel :)
x.
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bad night with lots of restlessness. Gave meds at 3am and she is asleep still at 7am.
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oh...and i appreciate your honesty Vicki. I can get too stressed out by sleep so just keep me in line ;)
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Despite the bad night, that late WU could give you the later BT you've been waiting for Becky! I hope you are able to stick with the 5.45 A time and push the day out.
Oh and I hear myself in you when you seem to be feeling hopeless, and for me that always comes from being very tired myself. It sometimes takes another to point out any positives. Glad you didn't think 'Cheeky B**gar!' LOL ;) :-*
x.
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did 5.45 but she did a 1 hour nap - 12.45-1.45pm just less than. Hopeless!
She has a cold and a cough again. I am going to stick with 6.30pm BT though as DH has made me promise to just stick with that BT for a week although we were hoping it could be later with a later nap but no!
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Hey Becky, didn't get on much over the weekend. I agree with Vicki, she's so wise and I totally need that straight shooting when I'm unsure as well. However, a lot of the sleep you're getting sounds like it's teeth or maybe the cold interrupting things too, so don't get too down on all the times. There's only so much we can control (said just as much to myself as anyone else ;)).
We actually got a 7am wake-up on Saturday too, but of course it was after a 1.5hr NW. ::) :P Blasted canines!
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However, a lot of the sleep you're getting sounds like it's teeth or maybe the cold interrupting things too
Totally agree, it just feel so unfair when you're making head way and then all of the coughs/colds and teething join the party >:( Do you think because she's UTW that 5.45 was too long for her Becky, and that's why she short napped ???
x.
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Do you think because she's UTW that 5.45 was too long for her Becky, and that's why she short napped
totally but what do I do vicki? I am trying to stick with something and there are NO tired signs so it is so hard.
Bad night again. Slept well but was then awake pretty much from 3.50am. DH slept downstairs with her at 5.30am and she did go back to sleep at some point until 7am.
She is OT, I know that, I have known that since we started this 1 nap thing but I just don't know how to improve things.
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Not sure there is an alternative either Becky, no point in me going over why, as you already know, I think it is simply going to be a matter of time. If he literally drops off when she's poorly, then it's taken out of your hands.
(Hugs)
x.
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If he literally drops off when she's poorly, then it's taken out of your hands.
sorry hun what do you mean?
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Sometimes they fall asleep on the floor! or in their food etc (although not Sam EVER!) so I'm just saying if she is that exhausted there's nothing you can do to stretch her to 5.45 A time ;)
x.
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no she is like sam in that way.....no tired signs and literally no chance of falling asleep....I wish she would!
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I think we are just in chaos now. 30 min naps, wake ups at night all over the place. Sigh. It is never ending.
There must be discomfort as she sleeps much much better with nurofen.
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she did 1.5 in the end but woke crying as usual - maybe pulling back the A time a little did help....afternoon was fine and we stuck to 6.30pm so a shorter A but same actual BT which might help???
I wonder how much of this is 18 month sleep regression now....naps just seem to be rubbish whether she has a cold or not and we either get NWings or EWings every day. Makes it hard to be consistent that is for sure!
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I wonder how much of this is 18 month sleep regression now.
I never even thought of that Becky! But from what I hear about it, it does sounds quite likely.x.
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I was going to suggest that that might be playing a part - I'm sure that we have had that here. Not entirely sure if we are over it, but things have improved since you started this thread - I don't think we are ever going to get good naps, but we seem to be back to a point where I can normally count on an hour or so and sometimes it is more. Nights are not dreadful - he is normally getting to 5ish without needing any intervention, so I can at least have a good chunk of sleep. So hopefully miss m is heading that way too.
One thing that I do wonder - can you put her to bed super early (regardless of how long her nap is) and what happens if you do? I know with the girls that sometimes the ot was so deeply ingrained that I needed to toss out the rule book - with them it was letting them nap for as long as they wanted (as I always had to wake them from naps) and put them to bed at the usual time so their a time after their nap was only 3-3.5h, but doing that once or twice seemed to catch them up and they would go back to normal. I know that m isn't really a long napper either, so I am wondering if drastically cutting her afternoon a time by putting her to bed really early might achieve the same thing?
The other thing that I started doing with the girls at about this age was counting the a time for the day rather than morning and afternoon - so I figured that they needed 10 hours a and 2 hours nap in a 12h day, so if they were up for 6 hours in the morning then they could only cope with 4 in the afternoon. Maybe worth thinking about if you are having trouble fixing a times or nap times?
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The other thing that I started doing with the girls at about this age was counting the a time for the day rather than morning and afternoon - so I figured that they needed 10 hours a and 2 hours nap in a 12h day, so if they were up for 6 hours in the morning then they could only cope with 4 in the afternoon. Maybe worth thinking about if you are having trouble fixing a times or nap times?
This is really interesting and goes along with long am over riding short pm, which works well for a lot of LO's when they're younger. What did you do if they short napped ??? cut the day shorter ???
x.
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You're going to kill me for saying this, but they didn't! I think it happened a handful of times between them, and so I used to just put them to bed at the usual time because it felt like moving things around would create more problems than it solved.
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Clever LO's ;) I used to cut Sam's day short but he would 'super tack' so that was my saving grace :)
x.
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clare - she def likes a short a time after her nap but with short naps that is pretty hard.
I am not anti EBT's although I probably come across like I do. Neither of mine are super tackers and that is an issue. When we started the 1 nap days I would put her to bed at about 6pm and she would do a long night i.e. 12 hours but then the nap did not lengthen and 6pm became the norm so started having little effect and now we are in a situation where 6.30pm is a late BT.
I am lost I really am. I am not sure it is as simple as OT but maybe it is. Last night she slept 6.30-6.20am but she did have a bad coughing episode in the night and she also stirred at 5.45am so not sure how good her sleep was after that. I aimed for a 12pm nap which was about the A time we have been aiming for but she is up there now fussing etc. I really do think that without sorting the naps the nights are going to be totally hit and miss. Some nights will be good if she has managed to have a shorter day through waking at about 5am but going back to sleep, some will be longer if she wakes around 6am but without a decent nap she is going to struggle. I am very tempted now to just set nap at 12pm which works for me and she will have to get used to it. We have been going through this for a month now. She used to love her naps, now it is a battle and I went through this with H who was quite simply a terrible napper. I am so happy the nap days are gone with him!
I really feel that if we start 5.30pm Bt's we will get caught in a tricky situation. As DH says, it is fine as a one off or when days are really terrible but doing it 3-4 times a week, more, which is what we were doing gets us nowhere. She needs to nap!
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I feel your pain as I am still battling that one as well! I have come to the conclusion that x is never going to nap well, so I have fixed it at 12 because that fits with the rest of the family and bedtime moves between 6 and 6.30 depending on how the nap has gone. I do think that x will drop the nap quite early, so I am figuring that I just need to put up with it for a short while longer and then it will be done and dusted.
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I have come to the conclusion that x is never going to nap well, so I have fixed it at 12 because that fits with the rest of the family
yes, I am feeling that way too as time goes on!
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another 1.15 nap. What do 1.15 naps mean??
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I think I have a choice. I either have to cut back on the A time as I am assuming this is OT so maybe try 5 hours?? or I just set the nap for midday and deal with an OT lo but hope she adjusts at some point. I cannot see many other alternatives really. I am bored of rushing back from places to just get a short nap where she wakes crying yet again. yawn.
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she went back to sleep :)
First time for me she has done that in ages.
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Hi Hun, well that's good news. Hand on heart I'm not sure what I would do in your situation. If this is linked with regression then there is a chance that you may change things up, when they would eventually improve if they were left where they were :-\. Are you slowly pushing BT at the moment ???
x.
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we have kept BT at 6.30pm for about 5 days now as we have been trying to be consistent with something.
Today
A - 6.20am
Nap - 12-1.50pm (with wake up at 1.15pm)
BT- ?
I am sure it is one of those whatever I do it will backfire. Part of me thinks we had a good night and a good nap so if I do less than 7pm we will get an UT EW yk?
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Even though it would be a longer day than preferable I'd be tempted to go for 6.45 BT earliest, 7 if she seems okay. Sometimes you have to take a chance to push things out when you can. JMHO.x.
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yes, I agree Vicki. Aiming for 7pm x
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How did BT go Hun ???
x.
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perfect...asleep by 7am and STTN until 6am. Phew.
Not sure what to today though???
I guess stick to about 5.5 A time but same thing is happening, nap gets earlier because morning is and things then spiral in the wrong way!
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A 6am WU Hurrah! I'd go with 5.45 nap and then see how long she does to decide BT Hun, She's doing okay on 5.45 isn't she ???
x.
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In all honesty I think it is probably a bit much for her, yesterday was 5.5 after a 12 hour night and got a 2 hour nap but I need to keep nap to near to 12pm really or so long to bed!
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But you can't keep nearer to 12 and shorten her A time, so maybe 5.45 is a happy medium with a 11.45 nap ??? Maybe see how she is dealing with it. Looking at the clock it seems you've no doubt already decided ;)
FX'd.x.
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massive yawn at about 11.30am. I did do a wind down so in bed for 11.40am x
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awake and crying after 50 mins. I don't think there is an expletive that quite sums it up.
Ok, enough. I think we need a re-think. Quite clearly she cannot handle normal A times for her age. What do we do here?
This seems to be the pattern.
Bad nap, bad night and EWing so we manage to get her back to sleep until a reasonable time i.e.7am
Good nap, good night but normal 6am wake, not 7am.
Bad nap, bad night
I think it has to be OT but quite how we manage this when she is unable to wake at 6.30am or later and also unable to reliably do a decent nap.
and so it goes on........
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no advice from me hun :-[...we were up at 4.30am and E had a 40 minute nap ::)!
I have to remind myself though that they are not robots - a certain A time 'input' will not always give the same sleep 'output' iyswim :)!
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but it never seems to!
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Back to my original idea of giving a 5 hour A time and hope for a super nap ??? then she may make it to a decent BT and push the WU a little ??? :-\
*&^%£^&*())*^%$£"!£$%^&*()(*&^%$£"£$%^&*() an expletive on your behalf! x.
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who knows vicki....guess it might be worth a try hun. A very OT M in bed for 6.05pm.
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All I can conclude is that x has stolen her sleep - I had to wake him after 2 hours for the second day in a row today! Which I think brings the total number of 2h naps in his life to about 6!
Hope that she gives you a good night and you can try again tomorrow.
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Just dropping off (((hugs))) *Becky* - we're in a similar short nap EBT ?UT/OT situation here so you have my sympathy :-*
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I had to wake him after 2 hours for the second day in a row today!
jealous...but pleased for you of course :)
Thanks Katherine.....it is never ending!!
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just out of interest Clare - had you changed anything? Was his A time massively different or anything?
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Becky we are experiencing the same exact routine here. Long nights off and on, anywhere from 11hrs-12.5hrs, and then short naps. One hour nap yesterday after an 11 hr 15 min night, and then a one hour five minute nap today after a 12 hour night! Sammysmammy is helping me too, but I can't figure out what to try and be consistent with. A times or set times for nap and BT. He's been sick for three days so we acutally had one 40 min nap which I thought I'd lose my mind, and a 12.5hour night.
But I hate the EBT and the EWU times too. Are we just to wait it out until their A times increase naturally? It seems that this may be the case when it comes down to it, no matter how much tweeking we do.
He won't sleep more than 13ish hours in 24, with a rare exception. But if he has a monster night sleep and a big nap too, I feel like he's prone to NWs. and EWs. ??? ??? ???
If I limit his nights, like today for instance, I would have woken him up at 6am(he woke on his own at 6:25), but his nap would have been at 11am, and I feel like he would have maybe tacked on the lost night sleep and given me 1.5hr nap, but who knows?
Again, no help really, but maybe we just have to wait this out....... :( :(
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You know Jennfl I've been wondering the exact same thing about long nights - if LO is getting almost all their 24h requirement overnight because of short nap/EBT situation, is there actually any hope of getting a long nap the next day?
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yup me too...jennfl I could have literally written your post word for word. x
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I don't really know what was different, becky - he did fall asleep earlier (11.45 rather than 12) but I'm pretty sure we have tried early naps before without any luck. I'm going to stick with the 11.45 plan for a few days and see what happens. It's not a time related, though - yesterday he woke at 5.30 but today was 6, so his a time today was half an hour shorter but got me the same nap. ???
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we got a 12 hour night which is great :)
Same issue today though.....have decided today when she wakes I am just going to lie down in her room on the floor so at least she is resting.
I will never solve it unless I know what the issue is. I am guessing it is OT but bringing nap much earlier than 11.30am is a PITA and risky if she does not nap a good solid 2-2.5 hours.
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another 1 hour nap, waking crying.
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(((Hugs))) Becky :( any discomfort at the moment? Am guessing an hour is one sleep cycle for her now? Have you tried meds to see if they help? What's she like once she's up from the nap - as in, does she handle the afternoon well or is she really tired and cranky? I've been wondering (had similar here) if some of these shorter naps are in fact UT enough to prevent LO transitioning to the next cycle, but they wake crying because they are not fully rested iykwim?
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we have tried meds on and off. She has a cold so is struggling a bit with that and she had one a couple of weeks ago so basically since we started 1 nap days. She 'could' be teething canines, they are the next teeth but not sure about that.
I lay with her until about 1.30pm and normally she cries and tries to get up but she was pretty happy to just chill there a bit.
Her mood is not great by about 4pm...tired etc. Another EBT looms which means we get 'stuck' there yk?
Thanks for listening xx
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Honestly Becky you are describing our days exactly at the moment. Just had all of a 37 minute nap that I couldn't resettle *sigh*
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hugs hun xx
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Clazzat, maybe it's the end of the 18 month regression ???
((Hugs)) to you all.x.
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Let's hope so, vicki! We got 1h35 today, which I am still very happy with, but is sadly consistent with any other time he has had a good spell - we get 2 or 3 really good days, then a couple of days which are fine considering how badly he sleeps and then it gradually just gets worse and worse... I'm not really sure that I identified the 18 month regression (although it did cross my mind last week when his sleep was just crazy bad) because we have never had good enough sleep to regress from!
How was bedtime, becky? Did you go early? How do you feel about trying to ap her back to sleep in the morning when she wakes early? I'm still not sure if it is a good idea, but most mornings I end up sleeping on the mattress in x's room from whenever he wakes up until it is time to get up at 6 - he does go straight back to sleep if I am in the room (he has never been one to go back to sleep with me, so I don't really have many ap options) and so we are getting much more sleep that way, although I am concerned about what happens in the long run. I'm just wondering if it could at least help you get miss m to a sensible wake up for a week or so so that you can push the nap later and therefore bedtime as well.
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She was slightly OT last night. BT is normally fine and it was but not straight to sleep like normal. She woke after 10 hours but put herself back to sleep and then woke at 5.30am but did the same and we started the day at 6.10am. Not bad at all but she 'is' a bit OT now so goodness knows what to do today.
I have tried so much to AP her back in the mornings and for nap time but it is not easy. If she wakes and is loud then I lie on the sofa downstairs with her and sometimes she will fall back to sleep but not normally. She is very AP resistant and if I am in the room it tends to make things worse..
I don't know, I know she is fairly low sleep needs and she has literally always woken early...not sure how we will get through it tbh.
Henry woke at 5.30am today as he has a horrid cough so everyone is tired :(
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If you are sure that she is low sleep needs, do you think maybe you could push her nap to 1 and let her sleep for an hour and then put her to bed at 7? Maybe that would push her sleep into the night, which I think is what you want?
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she would not handle it....anytime I push her in any way we end up in chaos. I have no idea clare, this has been going on for ever. We did get onto a good routine at 15 months where she did a 20/30 min am and a 1.5 pm and as long as the last A did not go over 4 hours she would sleep around 11 hours...
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I wish I could just say oh she is a bad napper and just get on with it but she isn't, she was so good on 2 naps and that is what is hard, That and knowing that her wake ups in the am ARE def OT. She has always slept less in 24 hours than other kids on the birth clubs but if she really was low sleep needs I would not be expecting her to get so OT yk?
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Is she touchy? I know a few touchy bubs who really struggled with ot but didn't need as much sleep as would have stopped them getting ot - does that make sense?i know that we had a hard time with getting e on to 1 nap as 2 naps was too much sleep but she would get really ot on one nap. With her we set the nap at 12.15 and just kept pushing her until she was able to cope with it - I don't remember it taking that long, though, so maybe m is not doing the same thing. ???
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I have never thought of her as touchy tbh, def not in personality but maybe sleep wise she is.
I think DH and I have decided just to set a nap time and push through with it like you did. I really feel an 11am nap is too early for us as a family and I also think being consistent is better all round. I think we will do midday. That way if she short naps it is not as early as if she had gone down at 11.30am yk?
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Good Luck with it Hun, everything X'd for you.x.
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Really hoping things stabilise for you Becky x
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we managed to get a 1.25 nap yesterday but I know she will always nap better for DH!!
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LOL same here!!!! No naps over an hour all week for me - slept 1h40 for DH! ::)
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How annoying is that when Daddy's are the one's who tend to wind them up at wind down time! ::) x.
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Sat
A - 6.05am
Nap - 11.45-12.55pm
BT - 6.10/15pm
Sun
A - 6.25am
Nap - 12.10-1.35pm
BT - 6.45pm
Mon
A - 6.25am
Nap - 12.05 - 1.35pm
BT - 6.50pm
Things have been better....clearly I am jinxing it now!!
We have had a 1.5 nap the last 2 days.
Wondering if sticking to about a 12.5 hour day sounds ok to you all....I feel if I push her further it may backfire but then is her day too short do you think?
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If she's STTN Becky it sounds good to me :) I often find I have to ignore what LOs 'should' be doing at any given age and actually remember to look at what's going on in front of me - your days look fab and I hope they continue for you!
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There's no right or wrong - the girls were on 12.5 hour nights forever (and still are, for that matter!) so just go with what works for her. If it is going well then don't mess with it!
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thanks girls, the only reason I ask is because I am the queen of cautious and spent SO much time in UT land with DS. I have to keep telling myself she is not DS!
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I often find I have to ignore what LOs 'should' be doing at any given age and actually remember to look at what's going on in front of me
Absolutely this Becky ^.
Hope it continues to get better Honey.x.
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FX you're on the up and up, Becky. :-*
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ha ha - knew I would jinx it. Awake at 5.35am.
Thought it was UT but she fell asleep with DH on the sofa about ten past 6 until 7am......
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So at least you know OT I suppose ::) Hang in there Kiddo. Have you gone with midday nap yet ???
x.
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yes, been doing that for about 4 days. She did a 2 hour nap today which I then had to wake her from so we could go out with H :)
A - 5.35am (back to sleep 6.10am ish-7am)
Nap - 12.15-2.15pm
BT?
I think I am going 7.15pm....
If she had woken at 7am then that would probably be too short a day but think that she does get OT easily and she did wake at 5.30am today.....
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what are peoples opinions in general about capping naps at 2 hours at this age? I always did it with H as I knew he would not do more than 13 hours in 24 so that worked well but if she is likely to get OT I don't want to make an issue yk?
Asleep at 7.15pm...not hopeful as bedtimes past 7pm in the past have not gone well but tbh if I don't take the opportunity to push the day forward a bit then it will never happen eh!?
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what are peoples opinions in general about capping naps at 2 hours at this age?
Becky, I'm sure with you being a TS Mod, that you know as well as I do that it is such a tricky question because of how diverse our LO's sleep needs are. For eg my Step Step Sister's little girl has just turned 1. My SS did GF (you know who I mean) to the letter with her Son, now 7 and her DD. Lydia's nap is capped to 45 minutes already or she just will not sleep a decent night :o My SS had a personal call with GF and this is what she recommended and it has worked a dream. She is happy and consistently sleeping 12 hour STN. So honestly Hun, I think most of us can only speak from our own experiences first and foremost but go with your MI, and trust yourself ;). As long as you don't cap drastically and quickly and 'fall out' should be manageable YK ???
How did it work out last night ???
x.
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not bad. Asleep for 7.15pm and awake at 6.30am but I did hear her about 5am and earlier in the night too.
Got a 50 min nap today...