BabyWhispererForums.com
EAT => Eating For Toddlers => Topic started by: lchuynh on May 11, 2011, 10:33:39 am
-
Firstly he is allergic to milk, nuts and wheat (the last two is 1+ and milk is 2+). Secondly he is little and everyone who sees him makes a comment.
He is at daycare 4 days a week and they tell me he usually eats very well there. I feel awful that I send my child to daycare without having eaten anything substantial. I've tried toast, cereal and oatmeal but he isn't interested. He will usually have a bit of neonate upon waking (about 50ml) and some fruit (blueberries and banana are back to being his favs right now).
When he comes home in the evening he is hungry, so I basically have to prepare a really quick meal for him to have at 5:30pm. He asks for crackers to snack on and I give these to him, but he stands at the kitchen and cries for his dinner when he sees me preparing it. He is literally climbing in to his highchair when I tell him it is ready, but a lot of times he will eat a few mouthfuls and then starts spitting out every spoonful that goes in. Sometimes he will eat everything. If I let him down and he runs around I can usually get spoonfuls in here and there. The problem though is that it is never consistent what he will and won't eat. On days where he eats everything I will offer the same food on another day and he will refuse to eat it.
On days when he is not at daycare it is basically continuous snack time. He can sign and say a few food words, so that's what he consumes all day long; crackers, bananas, apple, raisins, milk, water. I offer him other foods, but he likes to stick with his staples.
I guess what I'm asking in my long winded way is:
1) is fruit good enough for breakfast?
2) should I refuse snacks (and only offer at set snack times) so he eat his lunch and dinner?
3) when I let him off his highchair after only eating a few spoonfuls should mealtime be finished at this point instead of letting him run around while I give him his dinner?
4) how in the world am I supposed to give him a nutritious and balanced diet? I envisaged doing lots of "sneaky chef" cooking but he doesn't even want to eat anything I make!
I did BLW for a while but he played rather than ate the food, and I don't have the energy to clean up after every meal. I also can't afford for him not to eat; my parents already think I starve my child bc I'm not constantly force feeding him.
I appreciate you reading this far, and look forward to any advice.
-
Hi Lien!
We have a moving truck coming tomorrow so I have a bunch to do but couldn't read and not post. Hugs to you!! This sounds really tough.
Here are my quick thoughts, for what they're worth. Austin basically eats fruit for breakfast, although his is in the form of a smoothie. Might DS do that? We put greek yogurt in ours for protein but maybe you could do a soy yogurt? Not sure how that would go but maybe he would like drinking his breakfast? Austin likes to help make his smoothie and make the blender whir, etc, so perhaps that would help also? Oh and I toss in some spinach, too, which he doesn't mind and some days it's his only veg. ::)
I hear you on the snacking. If he'll eat snacks, though, can you basically give him food for snacks that you want him eating for lunch/dinner but right now he's not? Like could you get some peanut butter (or your equivalent there I know PB isn't big in NZ! ::)) on those crackers to up the calories if he's going to snack on them? OR give him some peas for snack? Or even pieces of chicken or whatever you do for protein? I'm just thinking that maybe you can use snacktime to your advantage for a while until he's not boycotting meals so much.
How long has it been since you tried BLW? I'm wondering if he's protesting meals because he wants more control and wants to do it himself. Might be worth trying again if you can stand it.
But I do think the bottom line is that toddlers can be picky! I would keep trying the things he likes (or liked yesterday :P) and offer new things multiple times, even if he doesn't eat them at all. That's what we're doing and occasionally he eats something new.
Is his doctor concerned about his weight gain? MY other thought is that if it's not really an issue, even if people feel like commenting to you about it (I honestly detest people sometimes!) that I would try your best not to worry too much about it overall. There are days when Austin doesn't eat. Oh well. I wish he would but he's doing fine so I just offer him food and move on if he doesn't eat it.
Oh and I would not let him run around and eat dinner but that's just me. At our house if he expresses that he's done when he's in his chair, the meal is over. If he hasn't had much I'll usually give him a chance to get back in the chair and eat more but I definitely don't feed him as he's running around.
Ok, I hope some of that rambling is helpful and more hugs!!
-
We've been having trouble with our DS too. Although he's not allergic to milk, he absolutely refuses to ingest any milk or milk products. He was doing similar things to your LO and was dropping further and further on the growth charts until he was down to the 7th percentile :(
In the past month, he gained 2 kg (2.2 lbs)! Here's what we did:
1) Changed what he was eating for breakfast. Before, he was eating mostly fruit and it wasn't enough calories. Imagine if you just ate an apple for a meal, wouldn't you be starving a short while later? DS was, so he was snacking and then avoiding eating at meals. We now offer him waffles for breakfast or meat (ham, pieces of chicken, even bacon!) and then he gets his fruit.
2) We cut down on the snacking. DS was filling up on snacks and then not eating enough at meals. He now gets 3 snacks a day: morning, afternoon, before bed (this last snack is a great way to pack in some extra calories in the day). We try to make his snacks a little heartier - muffins, dried fruit (more calories than regular fruit), etc.
3) At mealtimes, I noticed that sometimes when he said he was done and wanted out of his chair, he was actually thirsty. I find that offering him sips of his drink (rice milk) during his meal helps him eat more. Also, sometimes when he starts saying he's done, he's just tired/frustrated of feeding himself so I take over.
4) Pack in the calories whenever you can. I know most people disagree on giving kids juice, but in our case, it was a great way to pack in extra calories. Look for 100% pure juices, not the sugary kinds, and offer them after he's done eating his meal.
5) Vitamin/mineral supplements. Talk to your doctor about this one before trying it. My DS wasn't getting enough calcium in his diet because of his refusal to consume milk. My Dr recommended a calcium supplement because she said that sometimes when the body isn't getting the vitamins/minerals it needs, it's hard to put on weight in a healthy way.
Good luck! I hope some of these suggestions help you, or at least I hope it helps to know that someone has BTDT
-
I guess what I'm asking in my long winded way is:
1) is fruit good enough for breakfast?
2) should I refuse snacks (and only offer at set snack times) so he eat his lunch and dinner?
3) when I let him off his highchair after only eating a few spoonfuls should mealtime be finished at this point instead of letting him run around while I give him his dinner?
4) how in the world am I supposed to give him a nutritious and balanced diet? I envisaged doing lots of "sneaky chef" cooking but he doesn't even want to eat anything I make!
1. Fruit alone isn't enough for Dylan at breakfast. I completely agree with malenka, whenever I grab a banana as I'm running out the door to work I'm always ravenous an hour later. Fruit is definitely a part of our breakfast, but I also make pancakes/waffles, toast, or oatmeal/cold cereal and I try to get some protein in there if I can... Either in a spread on his toast or meat. Sometimes he eats a great breakfast, sometimes he takes 3 bites, but he always drinks his milk so that's something.
2. Dylan's in daycare 5 days/week and we try to stick to the same routine on weekends, so he does get offered meals/snacks at pretty set times. Breakfast is on waking, morning snack around 930/10am, then lunch by noon, afternoon snack on nap waking (230/3pm), supper by 6pm, and a little snack before bed with milk. Just writing that out makes me realize how often that child eats!! But because the times are set at daycare he's used to it, and he knows that if he doesn't eat at one sitting that there's nothing until the next one.
3. It depends on what you mean - at supper I don't chase Dylan around to feed him, but if he doesn't really eat anything I will keep his supper handy. If he starts whining or acting out (hunger signs for us) then I rewarm and offer it to him again.
4. Honestly, I just make sure that I offer a balanced diet at every sitting. I've heard many times that you can't judge a toddler's diet meal by meal or even day by day, but over the course of a week or two they will choose a balanced diet if given the option. In my experience that seems to be true - Dylan sometimes goes a few days without eating a vegetable, but then suddenly will be all about carrots ;) Lunch and supper always have a protein, a starch, and one or two veg, with fruit for dessert (or the occasional treat after supper). Snacks are usually fruit, a home baked muffin or loaf of some kind, 'cheese' and crackers, etc.
One blog that's helped me out a lot is www.foodallergymama.com - tons of recipes that are all dairy, egg, and nut free, and all of them could easily be made wheat free by substituting safe flour.
hth :)
-
Thanks so much for the replies.
I've taken all of the advice and applied them over the last 3 days. I've gone back to BLW. For breakfast I've offered toast with a variety of spreads, muffins, pancakes, meat, eggs - nope, he isn't interested in eating anything except for a bit of fruit (I give fruit as the last thing when he won't eat anything else). I do give him fruit and spirilina smoothies which he does like, but he only drinks 1/5 cup (same as if I give juice). I try to stick with daycare routines with EAS times, and over the weekend I've really been strict on limiting snacks but to no avail. He's very good at asking for water (he signs and says the word), but I've also had his water on the HC at every mealtime. And I've not chased him around the house with a spoon after I've let him down from the HC.
So the results haven't been great, but I will keep going with this way for at least this next week.
Kate, I hope your move was successful! Vikki, thanks for the blog link. Malenka, wow, 2 kg in one month - that's impressive. My guy has been on 3rd percentile most of his life, and also did slip to 2nd percentile for a period of illness :(
I'll let you know how I get on. Thanks once again.
-
Oh boy, the crazinesss. I know I'm not supposed to stress about this stuff but this IS stressful!
New technique this week - I'm packing his oatmeal porridge for daycare to feed him his breakfast. I tried all last week to get him to eat breakfast but I wouldn't call one bite of toast (and licking the honey off the remaining slice) eating. Malenka, how in the world did you get your LO to eat meat for the first meal? DS doesn't even like bacon ::).
Still sticking to BLW, although it is driving me around the bend. He just wants to play and throw his food everywhere. His first 3 spoonfuls are the most successful, then he is pretty much done and plays. I can't even coax him - he purses his lips and repeatedly says no.
So LO doesn't hardly eat anything for lunch or dinner, and then he asks for milk, and is persistent, eventually crying and has a meltdown. I've tried putting him back on his highchair and giving him back his meal, but he just wants milk. DH's opinion is that we shouldn't worry and give it to LO since neonate is a complete and balanced meal. WWYD?
-
Ok, Random question but how much Neocate does he drink?
When my lo was on Neocate around 14 months he stopped eating too. He would just snack and play with his food.
My ds is 22 months and we have the same thing, he only really snacks. He never eats a full meal, he is each food item and just grazes the whole day.
Just a thought! Charlotte ;D
-
Forgot to say with my DS it was because Neocate is a complete food as was filling him up :-)
-
Oh, somehow I missed the rely to this post and only saw it now - thanks Charlotte for your input.
My LO doesn't consume hardly any neonate either and I would prefer he drinks his milk rather than eat TBH bc he will get more calories and nutrients from that as opposed to whatever he decides to eat.
We went through a really good 2-3 weeks in June where he was ravenous and ate lots. So I thought things were finally coming right (and he even put on 600g, which is substantial for him). Sadly that phase went away as quickly as it arrived and he is pack to pecking at his food. I've even stopped feeding him any snacks and hid set mealtimes but when he only eats one mouthful and refuses anything else that's when I am in despair.
Our case is now being managed my the hospital public health system. We got on the list bc we ended up in ED due to wicked tonsillitis causing him to vomit constantly. They have diagnosed him with "failure to thrive" and we are now waiting for an appointment with a dietician. I am really trying not to stress over his lack of eating but it's pretty difficult when all he has eaten yesterday was a handful of blueberries, a few nibbles of toast, a mouthful of his dinner and maybe 300ml neonate all up. He is so active, and that amount of calories is def not enough for him to put on any weight let alone sustain him.
Sorry for the long post, I just don't really know what to do. At this point I'm happy for him to eat anything even if it's a biscuit - and that's saying something!
-
Hello, sorry I havnt been on here for a while.
It really is hard not to stress about it. The doctors keep saying keep calm, but it's so hard when you can see them not eating.
Have are you doing since your last post?
C ;D