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ACTIVITY => E.A.S.Y. Forum => Topic started by: Buttonbobs on May 18, 2014, 22:22:11 pm
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Hi all, by popular demand, please use this thread to support one another.
Please have a read of this before continuing.
How to use this Support thread
(most of this 'entry' is borrowed from the "Birth Club Rules of the Road" and modified - Thx to the Site Admin Team for composing it)
Many of our members have found it beneficial to talk with other parents who have Multiple Babies. The support thread is intended to be a place to discuss with, help and support fellow parents who are dealing with similar milestones, trials and tribulations. It is wonderful to have that company and a shoulder to lean on. In order to keep the thread open and inviting to all parents, the thread will continually be locked after 30 pages and restarted.
We do request that the topic is kept to issues surrounding raising twins or they multiple babies. Please use the appropriate birth clubs for more general chatter.
The role of the moderators is to review the support thread to ensure content is appropriate for the site, provide support to members, and help guide members to the main EASY board or other forum boards for additional help when issues arise that would benefit from their own thread & "airtime". Examples might be sleeping or settling problems with their babies. On the EASY main board and in other forums members often receive larger ranges of answers and support and other members benefit from hearing about others' problems and how they were solved, without having to wade through lots of pages of daily "chit-chat".
A gentle reminder may be posted by a moderator to encourage you to post on the main EASY board or another forum board if they feel your question could be better answered by the larger community. We urge you to follow through and post elsewhere, as you will see more support and advice from more experienced members. Please feel free to post a link in this thread so that others can chime in with support as well. If you choose to leave your post here, it will likely be split from the thread and moved to the appropriate forum by a moderator.
We also hope that you share your experiences throughout the community. Even if you are a new parent, you can offer support and hugs to another. We all started out as the new parent on the boards without the experience. We all learn from each other and your advice and support is valuable to us all. Please do not feel like you do not know enough information to post or that your input is not valuable - we are all parents who want the best for our babies, and we all have something unique to add to the boards.
** Please note, any posts saying M@arked or "saving your spot for later" will be deleted. Please take the time to write a few sentences or make a note to come back later to post.
Happy chatting!
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Hello fellow multiple mummies!
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Hellooooo!
Great idea as I really feel like we have a good group of multiple mummies on here now so it's good to have a central place to come and seek support! And to show off when things are going well (when does thst happen btw?? Joking!!)
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Yay!! Shall we do introductions or do we all know each other already?! And can I show off here about C managing all night without a feed?!?? For the first time EVER!!!! She woke up plenty, but that's another story ;D
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Yes intros would be good!
I'm Laura, I have a 5 (nearly 6) yr old with multiple / complex health needs and nearly 8mth old twin boys...
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I'm lily and I have 10 month old non-identical twin girls.
Feel like it's Alcoholics Anonymous! "Hello, I'm lily and I am a twin mum!!"
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Ha yes... It's definitely something anonymous!
I'm Beth and I have fraternal twin girls who just turned one!
I did BW from the start and realize now that the tweaking literally never stops! It was so so tough in the beginning... So much more than a textbook could ever account for... So it's great to have a multiples group on here now :)
Lovely to hear the show off stories... Amazing news about c's night, lily! Hoping to add a few myself too.
If you don't mind, as well as sharing the good it would be useful for me to have a rant from time to time as sometimes it's just tough.
Lovely to meet you all!
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My boys fraternal too.
Yes well done c. And of course beth rant away. I will
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Y y lots of ranting!!! Can we rant about non-sleep related stuff? Like how mine are covered in scratches, bruises and bites.....from each other!!!!!
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By popular demand - well Laura actually - I'm here!
;D
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My bugbear atm is just the tag teaming stuff ::) honestly it just doesn't end does it? Literally the minute I stop one of them starts!!
Yours are all older than mine do they really babble to each other? Mine will but often one talks and the other ignores!
Nippo - you haven't introduced yourself!! Do we have to call you nippo? ;)
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Wait until they start to make each other laugh... It will be the strangest thing that one does to the other to set them off. For example my B will often reach over and touch P's arm when they are eating dinner And P absolutely cracks up at this! It's sooo cute!!
Rant of the day... Had the first bout of illness with the girls this weekend with someone waking every hour or so. I asked DH (or should I say FH!!) to just resettle until midnight so I could get three hours in a row and he came and got me up at 10.45pm saying he couldn't handle it anymore! I stabbed him a thousand times in my head :)))).
And hello nippo!
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Ooops sorry - my name is Nicki and I live in London.
I don't smoke - despite the screen name, people seem to like calling me nippi or nippo.
I agree, the setting of each other will soon turn into looking for each other at bedtime and chatting to each other until they fall asleep. My two used to hate the other disturbing them but now they wait for each other and get really excited when the other is there. They don't really need me there to comfort them because they have each other. It help signals bed time and nap time because they know when they are both in there together it's bedtime!
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Hi everyone!! I feel I should confess that my real name is elizabeth but my grandpa always called me lily, and the girls middle names are lily and rose, hence my nickname!
I agree with UB and nippo (I like that name!!) that mine now lurve each other. Sometimes that makes them slightly dangerous - z shows how much she loves c's pretty eyes by trying to gouge them - but they def entertain each other. In the mornings when they wake up at 5 I can now leave them playing together in their cots, and if one is fractious at a mealtime they are usually jollied out of it by the other one now. If they are in a bad mood though z esp will cry if c gets anywhere near her. And I get so tired chasing around trying to keep them apart from each other, the cat, the multiple dangerous things I suddenly realise are in their path..... When I look back on it I think I found months 6-9 really tough - I was near the end of my tether when I started posting here. So I think hopefully things should start to get easier Laura, esp in the day!
Poor you UB - hope the girls are getting better. It is so horrible when they are ill at the same time. And make DH look after you!!
My 2 have been surprisingly ungrumpy today. Rotten naps though so fingers crossed. The trouble is with getting a bit of sleep that I'll be disappointed with anything less than a good night now!!
So lovely to have this group!!!
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UB - one of mine goes into full blown hysteric when the other bangs her legs down on the mattress. Every time!
It is awful when they are ill and I worry that we will be back at square one with the comforting and picking up. But sometimes it helps them breathe and so I think it's allowed. I hope they feel better soon.
Today BT has not wanted to be touched by anyone but me so I think separation anxiety is looming... She also woke at 10pm and would go back to sleep until I settled her. My husband tried but she was having none of it!
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Nippo, that's hilarious!!!
Beth, how are the girls? Any improvement? Hope so.....
Special hugs for your boys Laura and for you all.
I went clothes shopping today with the girls. It was horrible. They screamed and screamed, and did unscheduled pushchair naps and car naps, and didn't eat. Feel like we are trapped in the house a bit at the moment!! And I couldn't find any nice clothes and have bought a pair of shoes I don't really like just because I wanted to go home and thought they would do. Not sure they will!
Still, the unpleasantness stopped me spending loads of money as I was too stressed to stay long!! ;D
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Oh dear!!! I find my body has changed so much I can't quite bring myself to buy anything new yet! And I have dangly boobage :o
Well a bit less firm than before anyway!
Guys, my little twin keep scratching people. I clipped her nails today in an effort to curb her wanton scraping of skin but to no avail... My friend came round with her baby and my little one tried to dig her nail in her face.
She loves it when granny comes too as she pulls down her top and digs her nail into her breast. Weirdly, it is always the same finger (the index) and she looks a bit like Jim Carey doing 'the claw' in one of his films.
I keep moving her hand away and being very serious saying no. Moving her away and sitting her on the floor etc. But I think she is too little to understand that it hurts. She loves looking at her nail going in the feeling. She won't stop till her nail actually makes contact!!!
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No ideas to help but watchig with interest as C is a biter - I'm covered in tooth marks and now she has 4 teeth she is deadly! We do the same, move her away and say no, but she just laughs...
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Oh dear!!! I find my body has changed so much I can't quite bring myself to buy anything new yet! And I have dangly boobage
Don't know how to do quotes....but yes, that did not help with the clothes shopping! I'm just a different shape and styles that used to suit me look dreadful now! Ended up buying some really mumsy dresses from John Lewis.....the glamour!!!
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Hi all!
The girls are doing much better now thank you and we are all more rested for it. As a result, I love my husband again. For now!
On the topic of shopping it's strange for me because before I had the girls I could always find something I wanted but I literally walk into a shop right now and walk back out again because I can't even remember if I needed anything and if I did what that was. It's especially prevalent in baby shops, which before bubbas came along I would imagine buying practically everything I saw but these days I seem to reach overwhelm really easily and I can't make any decisions as to what we need or want.
Show off of the day.... P woke up last night at around midnight and did this kindve shout out, not a cry but a shout which she repeated until I went in to see what was wrong..... I found her signing the word for drink!!!! I gave her some water and she rolled over and went back to sleep... Ladies that was almost better than the first time they both slept through the whole night :)
What went well for you all today??
Sending sleepy vibes to everyone tonight!
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Wow UB, how clever of P!!!
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I weighed less after having the boys than before I was pg. But now cos of my meds I've put on loads of weight and feel worse than if it were baby weight.
Great news Beth. My night just pants again.
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Oh Laura. Massive hugs. When things get better we can be virtual diet buddies and lose the chub together. And all the other twin mums can cheer us on!
But for now sugar and carbs are the only reason I can make it through the day!!!
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Hi all! I probably won't be around to chat much yet but wanted to join while I have 'a' moment ;)
I'm Kayra and on saturday gave birth-via csection *ouch stitches*-to Mika and Lena, at 37 weeks. They are doing well, we're trying to figure out the whole feeding and sleeping thing. I'm trying to breastfeed and it's better than it was with my now 5.5yr old DS but it's not flowing as such so the majority of what they're getting is supplement. Everyone goes on about how small a nb's stomach is but these guys seem to eat loads! But that's a separate easy post...Looking forward to getting to know everyone!
xx
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Congratulations on the birth of your gorgeous duo, karyra. Looking forward to getting to know you and supporting you through the ups and the downs. The breast feeding, pumping, supplementing and having ten minutes in which to shower, eat or sleep is vicious but it passes ok :)
Hugs for last night , Laura. I too in the first few months following the girls birth lost more weight than I had put on but since I stopped breast feeding I gained it back again. That is, like lily said, because quick release energy (aka chocolate) is my best friend, the only thing that will compensate in any way for the sleep deprivation!
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Hi kayra!! Congratulations!!
I BF both of mine but Z had formula in the beginning because she wouldn't feed properly and to give me a break.....she weaned herself off it and was exclusively breastfed from about 2 months old. All the midwives told me if I gave formula she would never BF, would get nipple confusion, I wouldn't have enough milk. I ignored them and none of those things happened!! So if a mix is working then that's great! I would have v happily mix fed them the whole time but they had other ideas....but it really was v inconvenient not being able to leave them!!
Good luck, and looking forward to hearing more about them!!!
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And let the two to one transition commence! For the first time today both girls did not sleep at all during their am nap. B, in her usual chilled out manner just laid there and stared at the ceiling (something always makes me want to go and rescue her from that but I've accepted that she's fine on her own just being!) and P practiced pulling to standing and shouting to let me know she'd done it and that she needed help to lie back down again, only to repeat the process for the whole 45 mins.
So, unsure of what to do for the best, I went in at 9.00 and got them up, did snack and made them play until 10.45 when I gave them milk and put them down at 11.00. I did not give them lunch as they were cranky by this time so thought I'd do lunch at 2.00 when they wake up (notice how my positive thinking will ensure a three hour nap? haha yeah right, I'll keep you posted on that!).
I hope it was a reasonable thing to do. I was pretty sure we'd be on two naps for another few months... I wonder what the next few days/weeks will hold with this transition.
How are all you other multiple mummies doing today?
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Oooh beth, a transition!!! How did the nap go and what are you going to do tomorrow??
We have had a good nap day, and C slept from 7 til 5:30 last night! Z woke her up loads but she just chatted to herself and went back to sleep. So proud!
We are going to Greece tomorrow on holiday. Have to leave the house at 3:30 am for a 6am flight.....grim!! I'm guessing I just let the kids sleep how they want tomorrow?
Love to all!
Xxx
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Oh enjoy your holiday! Yeah just adjust to local time when you land and stick to your naps, they should nap really well as they'll be tired. It will be night time that they'll struggle if anything. Well that was my experience when I travelled to the uk, but that's a bigger time difference. I wonder if when you get back they will start sleeping through... I really hope so. This is how my two suddenly slept through... As if a miracle had happened! I travelled with them and it was a nightmare but on our return it was as if they really recognised home and their own beds and literally slept 11/12 hrs a night from that night onwards (excluding very recent illness that is).
So nap today... I resettled both babies at 35 mins (overtired) then they both woke up happy and chatty at 13.30. So they had 2.5 hours. They devoured their lunch and then we had a really nice afternoon at the park. I saw no sleep cues at all from them just now but I put them both down at 18.00 and it's 18.22 now and I hear nothing so I'm assuming they've gone off.... I wonder what the night will hold.
Tomorrow, I'm going to wing it depending on how they sleep tonight. If it's not so great ill do two naps, if they sleep well I'll try one again. Supposed to be going out though so I'm not sure how car journeys will affect things but I really can't be bothered to think about that right now.
Sending sleepy baby vibes and love to all of you wonderful ladies!
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Hello, my name is Izabella but you can call me Izzy. I'm 32 and have twins. Girls are 3 months and they are adorable. We live in Brazil.
My biggest problem is if I'm doing it right... some people say I shouldn't wake them up to feed... that I shouldn't wrap them... my days are crazy and full of stress, I'm taking care of them alone.
My routine is:
07:00 eat
07:45 active / sun bath
08:15 sleep
Same thing at 10:00, 13:00, 16:00. 18:00 bath and after breastfeed and bed. Around 22:00 - 24:00 the last bottle of milk.
Sometimes they woke up in the middle of night, others 05:00 or later.
Sometimes they have sleep problem, they don't wanna sleep and wake up a lot during the naps.
Tks for support
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Do you only go to yours if they actually cry in the night? Think I go too early? Will post properly tomorrow.
Welcome Izzy.
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Morning all it's 06:00 and girls woke up.... it's impossible to make them sleep till 07:00, both were crying so I feed them. Is it right? Should I feed them again at 07:00?
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Izzy have you got a specific thread for help for you? Just thinking we can try and be more specific for you on there?
What time did they go to bed and did they sleep through till 6am?!
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Welcome Izzy and Kayla, it's lovely to have more twin mummies on here.
Izzy, as babybarr said, it would be best to start a new thread outlying your problem and a rough idea of a typical day. When they are 3 months it is probably a bit early to have a proper routine.
Waking up at 6am sounds like a great time - not every baby has a wake time of 7am. Mine wake at 6am and although in the beginning I thought they should get up at 7, I quickly realised that they would always get up at 6 even if I put them down later.
They have their own little pattern that they follow...
The early months are hard, but it does get easier even though it doesn't feel that way right now.
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Yes welcome izzy I'm waiting for your new thread too.. I think if you post in the EASY forum you will get a lot more response from singleton mummies as well as us multiples mummies.
In the meant time can you tell us whether they were born to full term? What weight were they born at and what they are weighing now?
It looks like you are doing mixed breast and formula feeding... Can you clarify this for us please?
And I agree with previous posters you might have to do a 6-6 day with cluster feeds as well as a dream feed to begin to eliminate the 2-3am feed. Although according to your EASY it looks as if that may have already gone?
I think you are doing an amazing job to even have them on any kind of routine.. Well done you!
I was surrounded by mothers of singletons telling me not to wake them to feed them, feed them on demand etc, but unfortunately as mine were under 6lbs I had to wake them 3hourly (just like you are doing) because at that weight they would just sleep all the time (ironic isn't it!). And because they were so little and sleepy they wouldn't feed very efficiently either.
Sending you strength to get through for now...
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Ooh we could talk weights!
H was 5lbs 10oz and j 4lbs 15oz. Now they're whoppers! My friends singleton weighed more than both mine together weighing in at 11lbs 7oz!!
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Holy smokes 11.7lbs!!! Ouch!
Mine were 5.4lbs and 5.10lbs respectively. So P was first out and was the smallest and B was second and because she was bigger than P I had a really hard time getting her down into the birth canal. Apparently it's usually the other way around, the first baby usually weighs more which makes for an easier transition for the second baby. Anyway mine were about an hour apart..one around 10pm and one at 11... If they'd have come an hour later they might have been born on different days!
Just to update on the 2-1 transition well P ended up having a really difficult night after the day with one nap. Lots of night wakings and the following day she definitely needed two naps again. So I also napped b twice for the sake of synchronisation. And they've both asked for two naps ever since. So I'm not pushing the transition. I'm just taking one day at a time with it and hoping they stay with two naps until they're really ready to handle one.
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Well if they need 2 naps they do!
Mine were born by elective csection. H should've been born second as was twin 2 the whole way through but they pulled him out first and he became twin 1. He's definitely more dominant though!
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wow an hour apart, that's something! mine are 1minute apart :) Laura thats funny that the more dominant one ended up being twin1.
11lbs?!?! gosh! mine were 5.3 and 5.1lbs
i have a question for you guys, are your twins in synch, if so when did you start that and how? is it too early at under 2 weeks? I dont mind doing the demand thing during the day but nights are a killer. did anyone else do bf and formula supplement, i'm not sure if thats adding to the confusion, all i know is that we're tired....
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Kayra I feel your pain!
I synchronised mine from the start. And I did bf and formula supplementation. Doing both is so so utterly exhausting but I was determined for them to have some breast milk.
In hindsight I would have done breast feeding in the day time and formula during the night but at the time I did a breast feed and a formula feed both day and night so I never got a break. I did all the feeds. Sounds like you are doing similar....
As mine were feeding three hourly (well I had to wake them three hourly on drs advice) I would wake them both and chAngr them then tandem feed them then top them up with formula then put them in the bouncy chair or sling for ten mins then swaddle them, dim the room and let them sleep for 1.5 hours then repeat!
I did day time sleep in swing and night time sleep in co sleeper (we transitioned to crib at twelve weeks).
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Oh and I also pumped when they were in their swings.
Do you ultimately want to exclusively breast feed or you want to continue mixed feeding??
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wow Beth that does sound exhausting! I have my parents helping me, obviously they can't bf :P but they're helping with the bottle and changing etc but it does mean we're all exhausted. DH helps on the weekends but we're thinking of putting him on duty during the week as of 6 am too :P
If I could I'd want to exclusively bf but I'm doubtful I'm ever going to have enough milk for that..it just doesn't seem enough. At first I thought it was just them not getting it but when I pump I'm only getting about 50cc's which is pretty much the feed for 1 baby. I know the pump doesn't reveal all but I don't think there's that much more in the breast. In a sense what you say about just bottle at night appeals but surely that would decrease the milk supply wouldn't it? How long did you bf and supplement, was there a point at which you just went to formula? I'm also pumping to keep the stimulation happening and also to get all the milk out, b/c they aren't really draining a breast when they suck.
Lena is actually on a pretty good routine, mostly 3-3.5 hourly, Mika tends to be harder to settle so he can easily end up missing a nap in the cycle or just snack eating and snack napping so to speak. So ideally I'd want to synch him onto her schedule. I have twin feeding pillow but it is much pleasanter to feed them individually, I'd be happy with a half hour difference or so but a 1-2hr difference is just awful!
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If you want to exclusively breast feed you are right I would not do formula only at night... They need to be at breast as much as possible.
I was able to bf about three quarters if their needs and we made it to six months like that. I think I could have increased my supply if I'd had breast fed them more rather than pumping so much. If I could do it all again I would do e(bf)ae(bf)s... Not bf to sleep but definitely eaes rather than eas... If that makes sense.
And then at night just eseses......
Might be worth posting on the breast feeding forum about low milk supply to get some more detailed advice though.
It's so frustrating trying to pump milk whilst watching your babies when all you want to do is feed them!
Re the schedules... They are similar weights so should be fine on similar schedules.... Bw actually recommends a thirty minute difference between both babies which would suit your needs to feed individually I think so it's just a matter of doing to one what you've just done to the other only thirty minutes later...
It's going to hurt though.... The thought if wAking and feeding the second baby at night when your body is screaming for sleep is utter torture but it's not for long... The 2/3am feed will soon be gone you've just got to hang in there...
I'm in my phone right now so sorry for any typos
Sending you so many hugs for these first few weeks and months!
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thanks Beth!
I just pumped after they fed-they both bob off after 30minutes and I assumed they just got tired-turns out they are emptying the breast as I pumped practically nothing! I was quite surprised as they don't suck that vigourously! So they bf but then take practically a whole feed in formula or pumped milk...the little guzzlers.
I do have a thread going on in BF, I'm not sure there's much else I can do to increase my supply... I don't think they're getting even half their need from me at the moment :(
Right now there's no real A in our Easy, the E takes so long it's basically ESES unless they're taking a long time to settle..
I think I can't bring myself to wake L if M wakes first, she's such a good sleeper I don't want to upset that..
Anyway, don't want to turn this into a BF thread ;) I just need to hang in there! :)
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Hi, sorry to be late here, was on holiday....but kayra I exclusively BF my twins and I never pumped. I just don't get any milk out when I do. One time I'd been pumping for 20 mins and got about 20ml, then Z wanted a feed so I put her on the same breast and she took a full feed. I'll go and find your BF thread but I am a massive believer that if you want to increase your milk supply it's better to use a baby than the pump. This meant I was BFing almost constantly in the early days but after about 6 weeks it got much better.
Having said which, I don't think exclusively BFing is as important as they say - any breast milk is good but if mixed feeding works better for you as a family then that's the best for you!
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thanks again Lily, hope you had a good holiday! :) Going on holiday or 'normal' life seems a world away right now :P so it's good to see that there is hope for the future :P
I know I'm getting ahead of myself but how did you guys sleep train your twins? Did you do sh/pat? I didn't do that with DS so don't really have experience with it..and can't really imagine doing anything with twins to be honest :P What did you guys do?
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I just did a bit of back rubbing Kayra but at this point just survive the chaos!
Nicking each other's dummies is the latest things here, plus kissing each other whenever they get close enough!
Oh I should add both boys slept for 10hrs straight last night! I think I may even have had 6hrs sleep in a row!! woohoo
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Whoop whoop for 10h Laura!!!!
I did shh pat, then shhh rub, then reassuring hand, then just shhhh. But didn't do anything til 4 months old and not v seriously til 7 months....
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Omg 10 hrs and simultaneously!! That is like a gift when it comes to twins :))))
At this age kayra babies will sleep anywhere and through anything but I did try to differentiate day time and night time sleeping by sleep,ing them in swings during the day and the co sleeper at night. I also swaddled them. But i didnt intervene with the process other than that as they fell asleep on their own with no problems.
As time progressed and and they were still feeding three hourly but were a few weeks old I leaned towards using any of the five s's (set the scene, swaddle, side, shhh, or suck(paci) just to let them know it was time for sleep. To set the scene I would take them into my bedroom and swaddle them and tell them it was nap time. Oh and to sleep them on their sides I used to prop them back to back facing away from each other and that way they could feel each other too.
At around 3months old we transitioned from the co sleeper into a shared crib for both naps and night time sleep, but the same sleep time rules applied.... By this time they knew it was time for sleep and would often go to sleep just with setting the scene, swaddle, side position and paci but to lengthen a nap I would use shhhpat...
Hth for now..
How are you doing??
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10 hours Laura!! that's amazing! You must feel like a new person! :) Love the kissing :) I'm looking forward to when they'll be aware of eachother, they seem completely oblivious to one another right now.
these guys sometimes settle all by themselves but often need to be held a fair bit otherwise they'll just lie there, not necessarily fussing but fidgeting around without going to sleep... DS2 will often fall asleep with his paci-especially if I put him on his front...yes I know....but DS1 was a tummy sleeper too and he has good control of his neck, and I only do it at nap time for now.
I tried sh-pat with DD2 today (after snuggling for a bit etc), seemed to work the first time, 2nd time it seemed like she just wanted me to shut up and leave her alone :P
They are kind of sleeping everywhere right now, sometimes in our room sometimes in the living room, bed, moses basket, sofa...we're more relaxed about talking loudly, light etc during the day.
just a bit of back rubbing for them to sleep would be lovely! so was that in the cot, so you had them on their sides?
Also love the idea of them sleeping back to back :) these guys squirm a lot though, worth a try.
The kids and I are going to be at my parents for the month of July, I was telling my mom that it would be great if we could figure out the sleep training by then, doing it all by myself seems daunting and impossible. You guys are all amazing braving everything alone it seems-I feel rather pathetic :P
I think soon we're going to try doing the 1-2 o'clock feed with just bottles, so without any BF so I don't have to get up. I know it's not ideal for my supply but it's so I can get a decent stretch of sleep.. Still pumping a dew times a day.
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a bit of back rubbing for them to sleep would be lovely! so was that in the cot, so you had them on their sides?
Mine tummy slept too as did ds1. Well when I was in the unit the girls there st them for me really, replugged dummies and stroked their faces while they cried. Then when home I did back rubbing in cot to retrain them took 20mins and pretty much it!
I slept mine next to each other in the moses basket for 3weeks then they shared a cot until about 8weeks.
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Kayra you are doing brilliantly. They are still vv tiny, I honestly have no ideas about ST at that age. I was tandem feeding to sleep at that age!! And although I am on my own a lot now I had someone with me for about the first month and I don't have another child. Keep going, it's so tough but it does get so much easier and more fun. Mine wake up at 5 now and then play together in their cots until I get them up. And when they are eating I put their high chairs next to each other and they share their food!
How is everyone doing in general? I have just finished my first week of work, v exciting! Twins did well at the CM and Z has slept through 3 nights in a row!! And C has just needed one or 2 helps finding her dummy (she keeps lying on it!!). She has about 5 dummies in her cot but she throws out all the loose ones, just keeps the ones attached to her rabbit!!
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I agree kayra that you (and Laura) have done such a good job given that you have another child to care for too.
I did all resettling intervention in the crib, I never had to pick up at all until I travelled to the uk when the girls were ten months old. And I treated the five s's like a hierarchy of intervention, so I always set the scene and swaddled, the id give them ten minutes or so to fall asleep but if nothing then I'd put them on their side, then wait, then insert paci and wait and they were usually asleep by then. What would often happen is that they would sleep for 45 mins then need resettling so I would reinsert paci put them back on their sides and shush until they went back off (in times of utter desperation I would turn the swing or glider on just to extend a nap but I would turn it off as soon as they were asleep again - we call that APOP right?!).
Oh and white noise too... But in my case this was usually the pump haha!
Idont blame you for dropping the 2-3am breast feed.... That one is a killer especially if it involves a breast feed, formula top up and pump... And for two babies. No sooner have you done all that then you need to do it again. It gets to a point when you simply need a 4 hour stretch of sleep in order to function for your babies properly during the day. Having said that, and I'm not sure how it's going for you with your supply etc? I know if I had my time again I would not pump at all I would just nurse them more (because the pumping is the soul destroying bit). Sending you hugs and strength as you grapple with what's best for YOU because that is ultimately what is going to be best for your babies.
Quick update on us.... We tried another one nap day today after a good night last night and it went really well. That has been after a few nights of up every hour due to a throat infection, where I diligently tended to both babies every cry for help (while my husband slept!) whilst simultaneously wondering if me tending to their every cry was infact creating a prop that I would never be able to wean them from and I would end up having to stay with them all night every night for the rest of their lives... Only to realise (once again and in hindsight) that tending to our babies needs does not create bad sleep habits, in fact it reinforces our babies trust in us which is a prerequisite for more independent sleep. As soon as the illness subsided both babies have slept for 12 hours without the need for intervention from me at all.
Lily it sounds like your transition back to work is going well so far (although I'm sure it's equally tough too).. And look how much progress the girls have made with their night times :) a couple of paci replugs.... We can cope with that :)
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I know!!! Little champs!!
Sorry the girls have been poorly Beth - it feels like one thing after another sometimes! Well done on the one nap too. I asked my (v v experienced!) childminder about that and she doesn't think the girls are ready, so in a way am relieved as the way things are now (touch wood!) is giving us quite lovely days and nights!!
Kayra, I pumped about4 times ever, I hated it and never made any milk. And I couldn't see how it could be helping my supply if I didn't make any milk so I stopped. BFing and pumping is heroic and I can see why you are tired!! Lots of love and hope you had a good night.
Speaking of good nights.....any news Laura?!?
Xxx
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Not so good last night. Well h slept till 4 had a feed went back to sleep I heard him at 5.45am but he put himself back to sleep till 6.45 so about a 12hr night! J on the other hand was tossing and turning and up and down for 1.5hrs. I think it's cos he had something with tomato in. He's so sensitive. I thought a little bit would be ok. Clearly not!
Kayra we did every prop under the sun to begin with partly cos of the reflux but mainly for speed cos I couldn't spend ages settling them in cots with o around esp first thing in the morning with manic sorting for school run and the same after school. It just wasn't manageable. So they slept in their swings for ages but they learnt sleepy cues. I did the same routine each time.
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With DS1 I hated pumping with a passion!! but it doesn't seem so bad this time-maybe b/c I'm breastfeeding too? with DS1 I ended up just pumping and didn't bf at all after a week or so.. Once I feel that they're getting all the breast can offer I will stop pumping, but for now I don't think they're draining the breast, DD definitely not, so in a sense I'm pumping to make sure she/they get all they can. When I feel they're doing that I will gladly stop!
Thanks for sharing your thoughts on the ST, I've given swaddling another try and it does seem to help, we'll see. They seem to settle nicely one cycle, mess about the next one..luckily when they mess about they don't need to be held all the time and they aren't crying but it does mean they're even dosier the next feed ::)
Hope the girls feel better soon Beth, pft to DH's who manage to sleep through all that stuff or are useless even if they woke up ::) (that would be my DH-though when we get to those bits with the twins he may just have to learn to function when woken up!). I agree about bad habits though, when DS1 was ill I'd stay with him while he fell asleep etc, and it never bred bad habits, once he was better it was back to the usual routine with no problems.
Lily, what work do you do? Glad to hear the transitions going well.
hope tonights better Laura, good on H for putting himself back to sleep. Are they still in the same room with you? I must admit I find sharing a room with babies very hard, they're so noisy! We didn't with DS and now with these guys we're in a state of musical beds everynight and sometimes we're not in the same room or else I just can't sleep!
xxx
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No way Kayra!! They went in their own room at 3weeks when they outgrew the moses basket they shared! They went to a shared cot in the room next door.
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ok well that makes me feel better about not having them in the same room as me a fair bit of the time :P
Never thought of putting them in the same moses basket, i can't imagine they'd fit. The problem for us is that they won't have their own room, once their STTN we plan for them to share with DS...that's with the assumption that they'd do that on a similar time table to DS who was about 7mths... we'll have to see I guess, but when they get bigger we won't be able to just park them anywhere :P
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My two slept facing each other on their sides in the moses basket. They'd move themselves so their noses were touching. Afterall they were pretty squished in the womb!
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Laura they are soooooooo adorable! Great picture!
X
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oh that's adorable!!! they have beautiful heads! what was their birthweight?
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Similar to your two, H was 5lbs 10 and J 4lbs 15.
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Just a rant about being stopped every 5mins for people to ask the same questions 'oh are they identical' 'do you have twins in your family' and to say the same things 'double trouble' 'you've got your hands full'
It takes me so long to get round the supermarket now.
Feel free to add some more well known twin comments!
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I hear you laura and i havent even been out with them yet :P but when i was pregnant i hated the 'do yiu have twins in the family' question! I wasnt about to tell strangers that we'd done IUI, luckily DH's grandfather was a twin so id just say that, noone questioned the faulty biology :P not looking forward to more of it for the rest of our lives ::)
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I've had strangers ask me if they're natural or IVF. Can you believe it? It's the staring as well which is tiring after a while.
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Hi. I've just joined the group so hello! I gave birth to twins 6 weeks ago and they were 35 weeks gestation. After a stint in NICU (2.5 weeks and 3.5 weeks) both babies are now home. Both are still quite low weights, 2.9kgs and 2.5kgs.
I've bought the BW books and really like the approach so really want to start introducing the method. As above my twins are now 6 weeks old (1.5weekd adjusted age) - is it too soon? They're roughly on a 3 hour schedule but the timings vary massively! I'm feeling very disorganized.
Does anyone else have experience implementing BW with twins, if so, any tips please or guidelines on how to proceed.
Also, one of my twins feeds quickly (8-15 mins) whilst the other can take 45mins plus and I'll still need to top up with a bottle. I'm breast feeding and expressing.
The twin who feeds for a long time also gets very overtired (I think...I see much more than 3 yawns before I can start getting him down), do much so that he can go with no sleep for an afternoon which cleRly stresses him out - I'm not sure what I'm meant to do as he needs the feed to increase his weight?!
Thanks in advance for any guidance!! X
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Hi Nat and congratulations!! We're just 3 weeks behind you but it seems normally we' be lees than a week apart :)
Mine are 3w old born at 37w.
Sorry you had to be in the NIcu but glad to hear its all behind you now.
Mine are on a 3 or 3.5 hr cycle, sometimes we'll even have a 4hr stretch! But i dont watch for yawns really? B/c they stay awake for such a short time by the time they're changed and fed we just swaddle them
And start to settle them. Having said that your faster might be able
Do some a time, but if you can i'd try starting to
Settle him about 45min after hes woken up.
Looking forward to getting to know you guys more! :)
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Hi Kayra. Thanks for replying so quickly. Big congrats to you too! Sure your household has been turned upside down much like mine 😳☺️
I'm looking forward to getting more tips and tricks from you all. X
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Hi Nat and welcome.
What sort of twins have you got? Have you got any other children?
Like Kayra said at that age once they're fed and changed it's back for more sleep. I think you can only do what you can do and remember at this age accidental parenting doesn't happen. They don't start having "props" until 12weeks plus. My boys slept in their swings cos it was easier and quicker to begin with.
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sorry for all the typos, was on my phone.
yes we're in upheaval :P My parents have moved in for these first 6 weeks too-thankfully-but it makes a full house ;)
Maybe you could put the quick feeder into a swing once he's done, he'll have his A time there and then fall asleep hopefully. The slower one I'd say just change feed and swaddle for sleep. I realise now that with my first son I wasn't doing the swaddle properly but with these guys we've now got the hang of it and it makes it SO much easier to settle them.
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Hi nat and welcome to the group!
Congratulations on your precious precious bundles of joy :)
Looking forward to supporting you as much as you need....
Are you tandem feeding them or is there a stagger?
I agree with getting the hang of swaddling them for now. So up, feed, ten-thirty mins in swing then swaddle and down for 1.5hra nap (3hourly is roughly 1.5up 1.5down). You are right though, to top up the hungrier baby, as it will keep your supply up and help them to sleep longer, so they will feed better when they wake up etc....
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so i've been browsing the Easy board re.routines, naps, cluster feeds, df etc. i'm thinking that around 4-6 weeks i might try the cluster and df-which would include me waking them probably since cluster feeding is every 2 hrs, so anyway one question I have is has any of you tried that with your twins? My other question is that such a routine seems to need a pretty stable 3hr'ly routine, we vary on a 3, 3.5, 4 even 4.5 hr routine...so their naps aren't always 1.5hr, sometimes 1 sometimes 2.5hrs, so should I be waking them if they nap long?? I hate to and often they do that longer nap b/c they didn't nap properly the previous cycle or sthg. I don't expect to be on a proper routine for a couple more weeks but on the other hand don't want to be messing things up now making it harder to sort things out later..what do you think?
We've had a good day today :) i got a 5.5-6hr chunk of sleep last night-thanks to my parents doing one of the night feeds with just bottles-and I've felt so good all day, it truly makes such a difference!
How's everyone else doing?
xx
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In my experience with my babies, the answer to your queries about cluster feeding, dream feeding and waking to feed are yes, yes and yes.
Yes I cluster fed and dream fed to eliminate the 2/3am feed. It may seem like it's not worth it as they seem to take so little when fed so often but it adds up to more day time intake than with regular 3-4 hourly feeds over 24 hours. And yes this is when I resigned myself to having to wake them up from naps. It is soooooo painful to do that but you'll find that they sleep more consistently well once you start to do that.
I agree that if you can be on top of it now it will prevent any AP needing to be corrected later on!
Good luck with whatever you decide to do.... You are doing an awesome job even thinking about this now. I am sending you strength in your conviction with the choices you make as well as I had a really hard time trying to convince even my husband that it was the right thing to do. I read so many chapters from books out loud to people around me to get them on board with sleep training.,., truly infuriating that the lazy b#st%rds wouldn't read even one chapter of any twin or sleep related books.
Fantastic news about the chunk of sleep last night. It really makes a difference doesn't it?! Should help with your supply too :)))
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thanks for that Beth! so when did you start doing all that with them? when did they drop the 2/3 feed? And whats the max amount i should let them nap in that case? or should i think of it in terms of keeping a 3hr cycle so if they settle quickly it could be a 2hr nap or if they fuss it could end up just being 45min one?
i just realised that according to tracys cluster feeding routine they'd have 5 feeds between 1-11pm-albeit not full feeds whereas today these guys have had 3 feeds in that time frame...
What is it about men, eh? My DH will spend ages reading news, technology updates, any inconsequential info but will he read anything on parenting...? of course not ::)
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Kayra you sound like you're doing amazingly well. I guess you need to stick to 3hr routine.
Things here aren't great :(
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Kayra tbh it's hazy! I think it was somewhere between 8 and 12 weeks that I started to 'take charge' of it all so to speak. Up until that point I'd done a varied EAS pattern, a bit like what you are doing where sometimes it was three hours sometimes four and I'd pray for five or six at night (but knew I was supposed to be doing three hourly so felt very guilty about that).
At this point I'd imagine you are learning the different cries and sleep cues and feel very frightened to miss a sleep cue for fear or over tiring them or to miss-judge a cry for fear of them losing trust in you. And on top of that you are trying to be 'relaxed' about breast feeding so the milk just 'flows' but you're so tense about them feeding for too long or too short a time that you're not sure if they are feeding from you well at all (well that is how it was for me anyway!) and all you want to do is breast feed them but you don't want to create a 'prop' by letting them fall asleep at the breast.... God and I could go on. It's a whirlwind of emotional pulls where you don't know what to do for the best!
Given everything you've got to juggle I really like your idea of keeping an eye on the time for feeding but allowing some variation in their sleep pattern (within that) and I'd imagine that over time their sleep will even out. Just to add a sleep safety net in there for you though, be sure to put them down early enough to allow for a 1.5 hr nap (even of you haven't seen sleep cues yet) because when I started this process I soon realised what Tracy was getting at when she said that 45 mins was not a restorative nap but 1.5 hrs was. And one bonus about that which Tracy doesn't really mention is that it's nice when your babies are able to be in their cribs (or wherever you nap them now, but cribs eventually) a little undertired and not find that distressing because it's a god send for me now that I can put my girls down for bed up to half an hour before they are really tired and they are content in their cribs until they feel tired enough to sleep.
This has turned into quite a long post and if I go on much longer you won't have time to read it so I will stop there for now!
Oh but one more thing regarding when the 2/3am feed will go... With mine it was around 12 weeks I think and it became the dreaded 4.30/5 am feed which is too early to start the day but they are too hungry to go back to sleep.... But don't worry when you get there we can help you out with that ok :) so for a while I was doing dream feed cluster feed and night feeds... It was insane but it doesn't last long!
Sending you hugs while you're figuring out the best way forward for you all....
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thanks Beth, only now getting a chance to post since it's been a crazy day! Nap mutiny x2!!!
to be honest I'm pretty relaxed on the breastfeeding front, they suck some, get formula, I pump if I can and they get that too, I'm not stressing. It's only stressful when they don't latch properly or keep bobbing off etc.
today was frustrating when they wouldn't nap, i commented to my mum that i'm only coping with such a scenario because they are there and b/c I'd had a decent stretch of sleep, had I been planning to nap during their nap I'd have been super-frustrated!!
we generally start to settle them after an hour or so, sometimes they go down a treat sometimes they just dont, no idea why. but yes 45 min naps are almost pointless but better than nothing :P
right now just a 4/5 feed without the 2/3 one sounds great and i feel that in a sense thats my first goal. but i probably need to wait a couple of weeks before i take charge in that sense and when i do it'll basically be making sure they're on 3 hrs, cluster feeding and df'ing and praying it works :P
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Hi everyone sorry I've been a bit AWOL....work is busier than I thought it would be!
I am afraid I can't really comment on early sleep training as I didn't do anything til 4 months and only heard of BW when they were about 8 months. My personal opinion is that you have to survive, and I was v slow to ST because I found it more stressful than the sleep deprivation IYSWIM.
Laura, what's going on with the boys? I've read your other thread.....poor you! Do you think it is their little tummies? Could you try giving them a really bland supper - mashed potato or something? I'm guessing you have already tried that. When are you back to work?
Kayra and nat......hugs and solidarity. It gets better!
Beth - how are the girls? Any further work on the transition?!?
Oh, my least favourite twin comment is "double trouble". What does that even mean?!?! And people who ask if I had IVF - why do they even care? And when I say "no, we had sex" they get all offended!!! Idiots!!
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And when I say "no, we had sex" they get all offended!!! Idiots!!
Oooh I'm going to start saying that!!!
It's the constant staring as well which gets slightly annoying. When they were tiny I quite liked that people wanted to stop me and comment but after a while it's tiring! I've decided now to just tell people who think they're identical that they are...it's quicker! ;)
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Hi all. Takes me a while to reply 😁 something I'm sure you can all empathize with!
In answer to questions:
Fraternal boys (Oliver and Jack 😍)
I've tried tandem feeding a couple of times, reasonably successful if I have someone with me to help burping and propping if one falls off but I've struggled alone to manage. Any tips?? My boys have quite shallow latches as well which does help..(if anyone can tell me how to make them open their little mouths wider I'm all ears!!)
Currently feeding separately and trying to stagger them by 30 mins or so but honestly, they completely have their own agenda so I'm just demand feeding each of them really - definitely not sustainable!
I'll check out videos on proper swaddling and will put In to action..
Thanks for advise on swings/bouncers - I'll definitely start doing this with Jack (faster eater)
Any other tips/tricks/guidance on getting these boys into a routine that's achievable are greatly greatly appreciated!
Thanks. X
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Routine I can't help with....but feeding yes!!!!
Z had a shallow latch (ouch!!) and I used to either do a "nipple sandwich" and squash it between my fingers so she could get more in, or a "nipple flipple"....hold nipple between thumb on top and index finger underneath. When baby opens aim nipple to top of his mouth and use your forefinger to gently push his chin down to help him open a bit wider. Then let go with thumb and let the nipple flip into his mouth. Really hard to describe but really, really works!
Tandem feeding tough on your own at that age. I used to do it sitting on the floor with lots of cushions so they didn't have far to fall. Latch better feeder first then you can mess around with bad feeder as much as you like. I used to put them into bouncers afterwards then burp one at a time, the colicky one first! But it got much easier as they got bigger.
I had 2 baby bjorn bouncers and they were brilliant - one in bouncer while other feeding etc. Easy to bounce with a foot, wash easily, etc. When I was on my own in the early days I would feed burp bounce to sleep then repeat with other twin, etc, etc. I demand fed until about 12 weeks I think....It was tough but my supply was always awesome, I never had to pump and my babies grew brilliantly. So it does have advantages!
Can't help with swaddling....it was so hot when the girls were born I was terrified they would overheat, then when it wasn't they went mental when I tried it, so no use there either! But feeding, bouncy chairs and moral support I can do!! ;D
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Nat, look at "flipple" on YouTube and there are a couple of videos.
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My big boy is Oliver :)
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Thanks ladies! You're a huge support already! YouTube flipple on to do list first thing tomorrow! X
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And when I say "no, we had sex" they get all offended!!! Idiots!!
haha thats hilarious! :) like you said re IVF, why do they care, why does it matter??
once again i want to bow low in respect to you guys who've been doing so much of this alone! I get all pathetic after a hard day and thats with support!!
although DS is bigger in size he's lazier about opening his mouth, i might look up that flipple too, what a funny word :P
Laura, havent been following your other thread, eating problems i gather, sorry :(
Nat i sometimes tandem feed with a twin nursing pillow, but only if i have to as i dont particularly like it. my ideal is a 30min stagger but for now we're basically demand feeding so it varies, but a large gap is definitely the worst!
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Kayra I think you can be excused from following... Just about!!
My boys were also rocked in bouncers and I used their swings a lot. Also cos they were bad at mapping they often slept in their carseats indoors.
I think anything goes when you have more than one.
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Ok so how do you encourage people NOT to refer to them as 'the twins'? I find it annoying that people don't use their names yk? They wouldn't refer to ds1 as 'the boy' so I feel like it's the same. How do you feel or don't you mind?
How also do you stop yourself from saying 'the other one' ! that happens a lot if I don't specify a name.
Latest from my Tesco run... Oh it must take you ages to get round the shop. As he continues talkin to me! Also someone asked me how I can tell them apart I just said I can't!
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i must confess i call them the twins sometimes, i try not to but it does just come out at times. I'd rather not but it doesn't bother me THAT much either. We also do a lot of 'her' and 'him' rather than saying their names for some reason, now that I think of it we tend to say Mika a fair bit but we use Lena's name less, goodness knows why! DS always calls them by their names though :)
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Hello ladies
How is everyone doing?
Update on our 2-1 transition... It's done! And we can all finally breathe a bit and take our time with, well, everything really. No more rushing to fit so many meals and snacks in with little time left for errands and it feels wonderful. We really have time in the mornings to do things like learn to brush teeth without watching the clock because of how many naps we had to fit in.
The negatives (aren't there always negative bits!) the middle of the day nap feels too important and is too long (2-3 hrs) to be able to do it in the car so our day is cut in two. We still long to go out for the whole day but always seem to have to rush back for a nap. Oh and Im studying for my conversion exams which I said I'd start once they had transitioned to one nap.... And I absolutely hate it with a passion!!
Hope you're all doing ok, given the trials and tribulations and joy and lol moments of raising multiples :)
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congratulations on being done with the 2-1 Beth, all these transitions are so hard! I keep thinking that now is the hardest bit of the baby stage but remembering these bits makes me wonder :P Having said that if I've had a good night of sleep I cope much better so assuming that's the case when these transitions happen I might be ok :P It's hitting home that being a high sleep needs person and being a mum don't go well together :P
My parents were away 6 days, they come back tonight *HALELUYA* We've had good days and not so good days, good nights and bad nights, today I feel absolutely exhausted we've had nap mutiny for most of the naps and when they have slept it's taken ages to settle and then they've woken up early. So grumble grumble, and to add to my patheticness I was hardly ever alone for all of this DH took a couple of days off and the other 2 days a friend came over to help...how DO you guys do it alone? Seriously, what do you do if they both need settling at the same time and you literally can't do that yet they won't stay in the bouncy chair or whatever?
anyway, here's sthg DH sent me today, amazing and makes me so thankful-despite my grumbling :P-for a healthy pregnancy and delivery!
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2659299/Identical-way-except-birthdays-Meet-twins-born-39-days-apart.html
xxx
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Hi everyone, sorry to have been AWOL again - work is really taking it out of me and by the time I'm gone, kids in bed, washing on etc.....I have been falling asleep on the sofa!!
Beth, well done on the 2-1. Must be a relief to be done and be able to get more done in your day. Need details ready for when these 2 think about it!
Kayra - I literally spent hours bouncing in the bouncy chair. Or tandem feeding then letting them sleep on the BF pillow.
Laura - how are those boys? On my way over to your sleep thread to investigate! When are you back to work? I have to be honest that I call mine "the twins", "the kids", "the girls" a LOT - probably shouldn't!! Just lazy!!
Nat - how's the BFing??
As for us....the girls are ill again....up at 4:30 :o both fell asleep in the car 8-8:30 and not sure what to do now!!
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how's everyone doing? You're on my mind a lot Beth xx
we're doing ok, as they are getting more alert (when its time to sleep of course not eat ::) ) getting them to sleep is getting more challenging, so lots of holding, rocking..which i'm not a fan of but b/c the feed still takes a good while we mostly miss the hour mark and have to help them get to sleep...i'm still bf and supplementing.
Are the girls better Lily?
Laura, how's everything?
We're off to my parents on saturday for the next 6 weeks..trying to figure out sleeping arrangements. What age did your LO's start waking each other? We're trying to decide if we'll be able to put them in the same travel cot or not..
hope everyone's well
xx
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We're off to my parents on saturday for the next 6 weeks..
Wow! Good luck with that!
I would put them in the same travel cot, when mine went to my mums even up to fairly recently they slept together. I think it's nice for them to have each other close in a new environment. Mine don't necessarily wake each other now... it just depends really!
Things ok(ish) here although had an awful night last night. I'm totally blaming the humid weather here. I'm back at work next Tuesday...argh. DH is in charge!
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Is your DH doing your childcare Laura? Good luck with work.....
Mine shared a travel cot til about 4 months but were seperate at home. I agree w Laura, they can reassure each other! Massive respect for even trying any kind of routine etc!!
Beth - hugs and love. Hope the blood taking is ok today :'(
As for us - the girls are pretty much better bit C's sleep has taken a hot, and the hot weather doesn't help! She woke up about 3 or 4 times last night but had had 2 2h naps in the day so think she still has catching up to do. My v experienced CM says to let her sleep out her naps again today so that's what we are doing.
Love to you all and lovely twin hugs!!
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Is your DH doing your childcare Laura?
Yes! and he's rather apprehensive! I'm a teacher and so have 13wks off a year and he hated his job. I'm hoping this will enable our family to have more time quality time together and also stop our weekends and evenings being filled with endless jobs.
Beth - I hugely emphathise on the blood taking. Personally from experience if they haven't got it after 3 attempts they're unlikely too. I would not let them try anymore than that if she is distressed. Just say no. you can bring her back another day. Some tips though are keep her warm and very very well hydrated. This helps them find the veins. Is she having emla cream?
Lily 2 2hr naps...that sounds like a dream.
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Seems like a sensible move laura, hope it goes well! Your dh wont know what will have hit him :p
Its been a bit rough here, they want to be held for sleep most of the time it seems, its really taking a toll on my mum :( she's started to bit enjoy them so much :( so im starting to regret our decision to be at theirs for the next 6 weeks... Cant change anything now of course. Im hoping that my dad being there will make some kind of difference.. It would help if one of the babies gave their first smile to her:p i appreciate her help immensely but dont like having this burden/guilt on my plate as well, and i know shed be upset to know i felt that way. So theres nothing to do, i just vent to who i can ::)
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It's tough kayra. I really sympathise with you. I was thinking today how hard it was when they were small. It does get much better very quickly, and I'm sure she's delighted to have you all staying. And they will smile soon and it will all seem much better. Take good care of yourself, that's so important, and take each day at a time. And vent away!!
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thanks :-* It's good to hear that things get better quickly. I honestly think the smiling will help, DS will love that too :)
these early days are hard-though already so much easier than the first days. I can't help but look forward to the months ahead. Today I had my obgyn check and he said to come in 6 mths for a smear test and I was thinking wow they'll be 7 mths then, is that really going to happen?...it seemed unbelievable, as though that bigger stage is always going to be something I imagine but not going to happen.
my mum's a bit better now, which is a relief, helps to vent though ;) Lets hope tonight isn't too bad. Thankfully these little munchkins are really cute or else putting up with all this would be harder!! :)
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Kayra so many hugs. Now at 9mths I still can't believe there's two of them yk? I'm now over 3/4 of the way to a year and I NEVER thought it'd come. I mean I know my situation and struggles are different to yours but it's ok to find it tough. My boys smiled right about 6wks (not 6wks from due date but from birth date iyswim?!) so not long to go for yours.
I'm struggling myself today. However I went to the supermarket and I was coming down the travelator with my boys and going up was a mum with B/G twins about 2months old! We gave each other empathetic smiles ;) I think it's the first time I've seen twins when out with my two.
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Yy Laura, the special twin smile!! It's like being in a secret society!!
Hugs to both of you. I hope you're ok. Remember that twins is incredibly hard, don't compare yourselves I anyone esp those smug singleton mums. Your babies are lucky to have each other and lucky to have you.
Beth - thinking of you and your little ones.
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I can't help keep thinking, gosh I could do this with my eyes closed if it were just 1 :P I know that's not how I felt with DS1 ::) but with experience and now having 2 it feels like it would be a doddle with 1. We are coping, my mums in a much better mood so that helps. You know how they say as a mother of a baby the mothers health and mood is so important, I guess that's the same even when you're an adult :P
Laura you truly have done so well, I think their first birthday is going to be a massive celebration for all of you :)
Beth, like Lily said, thinking of you!
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Hello ladies
Sorry I've been MIA for a few days. I've been checking in when I can but with two very clingy babies it's been difficult to get a minute to type much!
Following the leukaemia scare with B we now have both girls with coughs and colds. P vomits every time she has a coughing fit in the night ( she was my refluxer) so we've been up changing sheets and bathing her a couple of times a night this week... Not denying it it's been hell! Bbt that aside the girls have been as good as gold. I just find myself looking at B now (since the Epstein Barr virus thing) and wondering if she's feeling awful, or perhaps shes just always felt awful and knows no different and it breaks my heart!
It's good to hear how you're all doing.. Lily, surviving the back to work transition, kayra surviving your mother (just!) and Laura, back to work for you soon too... Watching and supporting you closely as you make this transition.
Love and hugs as always
Beth
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Hugs beth, yo really need a break don't you!!! Hope the girls are better soon, you poor things :(
We made it to my parents safe and sound, they've really made an amazing effort to get everything ready.
We're doing ok overall except that dd has decided that She needs to be held or be next to someone to sleep ::) hopefully itsjust a phase, it cant really become a bad habit before 3 months can it?
Love to all xxx
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Beth, it sounds rough. Hope the girls are getting better. It must have been such an awful time for you all. I know what you mean about worrying B has always felt awful....I just though C was a real screamer until my friend diagnosed the reflux...and within 24 hours of starting meds she was like a different baby! The guilt.....but I reckon all mums do it to a certain extent. My friend got sent out to play with a broken leg when we were little! WRT the sheets, when C was little I used to layer them so if she was sick in the night I just had to whip the top one off and there was a clean one underneath. If she's vomiting a lot you could do a waterproof sheet as well so you could bundle up the dirty sheet and waterproof and have nice clean ones underneath. Saves rummaging around at 3am!! Are you still waiting on any tests for the EBV?
Kayra - I read that bad habits can't start before 4 months so you should be fine! What a little sweetie! How's things at your mums?
Laura - are you back at work tomorrow?!?! Eeeeek!!!!
No news here. My 2 are EWing to beat the band but it's difficult to tweak because of the CM...so we are trying to muddle through for a bit longer then will try. Will need lots of handholding though!!
Love to you all!!!
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Sorry about the ews lily, any idea whats causing it?
We're ok tho atbtimes i wonder howni'l manage 6 weeks...
I feel like im constantly feeding babies..sick of having my boobs out all the time ::) they're still having bottles too but dd wants to comfort suck alor it seems..
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Constant feeding and nappy changing Kayra.... I wish I could say it ends but I still feel like all I do is change dirty bums all day ::)
Yes I'm back at work. My boys are basically going to one nap. They've been doing it on and off for a while but I figure it'll be easier for DH for now. We'll see what happens, but we can get them to bed early as we'll both be around to do bedtime. It does mean they're falling straight asleep at bt which is so nice for a change!
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Kayra, I ised to feel like that about the feeding. Can you get your mum and dad to take them for an hour or 2 every evening so you can go and have a bath and relax on your own with no one touching you? I used to go crazy to be just left in peace! My DH and mum used to put them in slings or take them for a walk just so I could have some time to feel like I owned my own skin again!!
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I dont mind the nappies si much-yet! My parents do the bottles sometimes but dd has got awful about settling and constantly wants to be at the breast! Its getting annoying tbh..i dont know when her feed begins or ends, she isnt napping properly either. My mum had her in bed with her half the night, me the other half, i've got her on me akl tge time unless im feeding or settling ds it seems. Shes also taken to a strong cry. I dont think its reflux, she doesn't vomit etc,cant tell if she does have some kind of a problem or if its just a phase...
Whats it like to be back at work laura? Ds1 went to one nap @18mths, hope your transition goes well!
Xxxx
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Oh kayra, they are still so teeny tiny. Go easy on yourself. I think it's v normal for her to want to be snuggled up with you and the breast is so comforting for her. Around this time I used to start limiting feeds to half an hour or so and then immediately putting them in the pushchair/bouncer/sling and entertaining like mad so they had something else to think about. And I know it's tough but enjoy her snuggly loveliness - I had z in bed with me last night as I was too tired to settle her and she was just crawling all over the place!!
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I know lily you're right, ds1 would never snugglenin bed with us, to him it meant play time, only thisnpast year when he was ill did he actually sleep when he got in bed with us! However the other night when dd was with me neithernofnus slept well, we've discovered that she also like to sleep on her tummy... Any other position and she wakes up... Maybe when the weathers cooler and we can swaddle again they might sleep more on their backs but thats a couple of months away and being bigger i dont think thy ey will like the idea... Ds1 was a tummy sleeper too, i wish i could let them sleep that way without feeling guilty... Ds especially settles so nicely on his tummy. The only time hes fine on his backis when he first goes down for his night sleep, hes super dosey and after te df. Otherwise he needs tummy and dummy! It really helps to not have to faff with him for ages...
How is everyone?
Xx
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Have just had the most awful night - girls have streaming colds so up every hour to give meds, blow noses, cuddle. Ended up just sleeping on the floor in their room holding their little hands as they were beside themselves! Actually had to get C up and cuddle her to sleep again at about 9 as she just wouldn't settle. It's odd because they weren't too bad in the day and went to sleep really easily at bedtime...but then awake all night!
Poor little souls. Thank goodness for the magic medicine!!!
Beth, how are you girls doing? And Laura, tell us about work!!!!
Kayra, mine are tummy sleepers now and I was too scared to let them when they were tiny. No advice really but feeling your pain!!
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Hi ladies
Both girls are doing much better thanks! And sleeping well again... I am always sooooo grateful for a full nights sleep when it happens again after a period of disruption as I'm usually convinvpced that it's never going to happen again! But it does! I'm really learning that it does :)
Hugs, lily, for the streaming colds and all night cuddles, meds, drinks, feeds (what ever it takes, right!).
And kayra, yes, I relate.. You finally find a position they like tot sleep in and you can't sleep because you're worrying too much. We had P in with us a few times when she was really refluxy and neither of us slept a wink for worrying. And now both girls associate our bed with awake time so there is no hope of them sleeping with us. And this is a good thing I guess.
Yes Laura how are you? How is work going? Am sending you hugs for this transition however it's going because it's a big thing :)
X
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Great to hear from you beth, glad to hear the girls are doing better.
Lily sorry to hear they're ill, is it often that they're ill at the same time? Hope everyone is better asap.
Bedtime again, on their backs for now, we'll see what the night brings....
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We're all to busy to post on this thread!!!
We're down to one nap but I'm just trying to work out whether to ditch the nf or just let them sort it out eventually. I don't think it's a prop...
They're both crawling and standing and a little cruising. It's tough!
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Yay Laura! Hello!!!
We are on 2 naps still but first is becoming a CN. But we have EW at 5 or so every night... :-\
Mine are nearly nearly walking. It's so cute!!
How is work? Guess you are off on summer holidays. And how are the nights? And when is the one nap??
Xxx
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Hi laura!! Are they getting ibto everyhing or is the independence a relief?
Sorry to hear about the ew liz, yuck.
We're doin ok,bsck at home and solo!!! I miss my parents company i must confess, it makes the constant feeding, settling more of a chore. I will get used to it i dare say but its a bit boring at present, i probably need to make some plans to get out etc. Dd is difficult about naps now, constantly needs resettling :( ds is better overall but dds better at night, so there you go!!
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Hello,I have a 2 year old and 3 month old twins. Life is hardwork at the moment. I'm hoping once I can get the twins to nap regularly in a proper routine I'll start to enjoy them more! They sleep very well at night. Down for 6.30 df at 10.30 then 4oz at 3.30/4.30. Then up at 6ish. Morning nap is at 8ish then after that my day goes wrong! One will nap an hour the other 30 minutes.
How can I get into a routine with them or am I trying the impossible. Do you set times for each nap and just push them to them in the hope they soon catch on!
Thanks
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Welcome! Wow you do have your hands full! Our twins are simillar in age, mine were born may 17th. Are they identical or fraternal?
I'd say that an 8 oclock nap is probably lat for 6 wake up, i'd have thought 7:30 at the latest.. I generally try to calculate A times,so every day is diferent ::) and it doesnt always work ::) i generally aim for 1hr15min or so. set naps are appealing in a sense but i think mine would just get ntoo ot at this stage and i dont really need them to be at set times so we're just going wit the flow :P
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They are fraternal. I tried 1hr 15/30 awake time but they just cried and cried they settle much better at 1 hr 45 ish. I hate not being in a routine.
The twins were born at 37 +3. Would you correct there age to 13 weeks instead of 16 weeks? Does that make sense? x
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Welcome! TBH I wouldn't bust a gut to get them on the same routine atm. It really is quite an impossible task. I had one up one down for ages!!
I agree with Kayra though, definitely need to put them down earlier.
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Mine were born at 37 weeks too :) i dont always adjust their weeks in my mind but if you're reading about wonder weeks etc then you do have to adjust.
I dont try to synchronise mine at all, when they're older and can entertain eachother i'll work on that. I find the beat is when they're about half an hour aparr in their 'routine' but that constantly changes throughout the day ::)
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What would a typical day look like for you? As in naps and milk? My twins are 3 1/2 months now so I know it's still early days but I'm such a routine person it's stressing me out not knowing what's going on each day x
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Who wants a monotonous routine?! (Me!! :P) we're all for spontaneity here sadly :( no day is like the other, i wish i could say they do a good nap at x time of day etc but i just never know. They wake up when they wake up, sometimes at the same time, sometimes 20mim apart sometimes an hour. And basically from there they feed every 3 hours unless we get a mammoth nap or a very short nap. I've started to really insist on the catnap as otherwise bedtime is awful for dd especially. The only predictable thing is i bath around 6-6:30 and then bedtime which can be as smoth as 7 or drawn out to 8+...
I wish we had sthg more structured but im learning to just go with the flow and not expect to be able to do anything but babies so that anything extra is a happy bonus :) i truly hope that things will get a tad more predictable ina month or 2, whatndo seasoned twin mama say to that? Shall i stop dreaming? :)
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Now on one nap we have a little more predictability but not necessarily consistency!
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Kayra my days seems to be going the same as yours! It's so frustrating!
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So this is how it goes till 1 nap..?
Kkemp, it is frustrating and these last few days have been awful :'( but i guess its an age thing :( come and join us on the birth club for the company of other mums with babies of a simillar age.
How is everyone?
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So this is how it goes till 1 nap..?
In a word...yes! We did find two solid naps not too bad which we went to at about 5mths. One nap by 10mths...
Hang in there.
Like the avatar Kayra!
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aww you've updated too, too cute!! :)
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How do I join the birth club?
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0-3 Months: Part 51
just start chatting :) or since yours are nearly 4mths too you can directly join that one, i'll be going there soon too.
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Hi ladies, how are all the twins?
I miss our chats.....
We are teething and have colds. As usual. But we are also walking and starting to talk so it's all fun. C stood up in her cot, held up her arms and said "mama" the other day, they say "plssssss" and "ta" and can roar like a lion.
Anyone else still here? Kayra? Laura? Nicky? Beth?
Xxx
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Lily how exciting!
Mine are nearly walking (they're one next week!!) They also like to "bundle" each other and play rough and tumble...
They make lots of similar noises and do things in sync which always makes me chuckle. Not many words but boy they don't stop babbling!
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Love hearing about all these fun developments :)
We're doing ok, we don't have a predictable routine but def. less of the awful 45min naps thankfully!
Dd has really blossomed talking more, giving gorgeous smiles the moment you make eye contact and after 3 months of awful settling, she self settles beautifully-provided you catch the right a time ;)
My theoretic plan is that when I start solids and they're at a longer a time (like 2hrs) I'd like them to be more in sync, is that achievable? Did you manage to get your twins in sync-ish?
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I think that's achievable. 6mths and two naps definitely. Esp if you did set naps.
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I'm a massive fan of set naps. Really turned things round for us. Wish we'd done it sooner! Having said that I think they are nearly down to 1 nap now (finally)!!! And things are a bit up in the air because of it. I think, esp with twins, it's really good way to get them in sync. To start with I was doing a lot of waking from naps of one or the other but it was worth it!!!
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You wouldn't wake the sleeping one if one did a short nap tho would you? So in that scenario the short napper would just have to stick it out till next nap time, right?
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Nope. I never woke the sleeping one if one short napped unless it was getting silly. I would always try to extend the short nap when possible.
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So would the short napper manage the next a time? And did you set things according to the wake up time or regardless of the wake up time say nap 1 is at x time and nap 2 is at y time?
Liz you said you'd wished you'd gone to set naps sooner? When would you have and why? Yesterday I thoughts I'd found the magical a times, today apparent not ::)
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I was v anxious when the twins were little, and I have found set naps enormously helpful. I guess it depends on your babies....but by 6 months or so I think it would have been helpful. I went all out to extend the naps, even down to taking the woken up one into bed with me and feeding back to sleep. And if I really couldn't.....I would wake the other twin after 15 mins. It broke my heart but I needed them in sync for my sanity!!! Set naps stopped me having to do that and they coped so well I was a amazed!
Our nights have been pretty bad recently >:( please send the girls sleepy vibes!!
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We did it pretty much by the clock give or take 15mins or so. Once they start solids it also helps being able to plan the food and sleep.
It helps their body clocks. However as much as you don't want to hear this I think you just need to ride out the next couple of months
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Yeah it's too early to do anything now, they were pretty much in sync today and I must admit it was lovely to get the brake of them napping at the same time! I even made dinner!! I must say its so much better now that they can cope with longer a times, less it screaming at bedtime 😄
Sorry about the nights Liz, any idea what's causing it's?
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Teeth and separation anxiety and colds all at once I think. Plus we should go to one nap I think. Here is my easy....any thoughts?
Wake up between 5:20 (aaarrrggghhh) and 6. Any time after 5:45 and lights on, before that I shh pat or hold hands til 6
Cat nap 9-9:15 - C usually, Z hit or miss. Recently it's started getting later too as they take ages to settle.
Nap 1-3. But if cn was late then a bit later. Up at 3 regardless
BT 7.
Z requires me to hold her hand til she is really asleep. Started out of the blue. I think she is having nightmares as she sometimes wakes up screaming, sweating and inconsolable. This all started when I went back to work. But....if she doesn't have a nightmare she sleeps through usually
C will settle with her dummy. Occ wants me in the room but don't need to do anything. But wakes up between 1-4 times in the night. Sometimes resettles herself but still wakes me, you know?
CM v keen to keep am nap and they are good as gold for her....
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Hi ladies
I'm sorry I've been missing from the boards for a while... Been studying for some exams and we are in the middle of trying to move house.
Quick update on us... The girls are almost 16 months now. All doing well. Settled into one long nap from 11.30-2.00. And we do a thirteen hour day and an 11 hour night now.
We recently had a sleep regression after a couple of months of them sleeping through the night. One or both of them would wake up at 1 and not resettle until about 4... It was hell and we did resort to feeding back to sleep which became a prop which we then had to get rid of. But we are back to normal again now.
Liz, with all due respect to your childminder I'm sure she does love having them on two naps.. Two breaks a day from two needy little people, but you need your nights (no one is paying you for the night shifts!). If you think it feels right then make the transition to one nap... I too wonder if it will benefit everyone at night time. When deciding to make that transition myself I remember finding that they were undertired at bed time and realising that they really needed to be awake by 2pm from their nap to be tired enough for bed time, which meant there simply wasn't time for two naps in the morning... How is bed time for you all ATM?
And I agree also that I was very keen on synchronising my girls right from the start and I very reluctantly woke the second baby no later than fifteen minutes after the first. I too went all out to extend a short nap but if there was no going back down then I woke the second baby for the sake of synchronising and just put them both down a little earlier for their next nap.
I synchronised mine this way from the start and the only exception was at the four month stage when we synchd the first two naps and I made the cat nap optional on the premise that if anyone skipped it then they had an early night. Mostly, they both took it though tbh.
It's good to hear how you are all doing you amazing mummas, although I also feel your sleep deprived pain and the torturous turmoil that having multiples brings to the mix in your posts.
X
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Liz I agree that if you think cutting the am catnap is going to solve things then go for it, you call the shots not the child minder! Might they need an earlier bedtime if they're waking so early?
Nice to see you Beth, I was getting worried that sthg was up with one of the girls-one was ill? Those nw sound evil, here's me thinking it'll get better as they get older 😛
Ds is rolling which wakes him a lot at night but he's getting better at resettling. However last night he fed every 4 hrs (ie bt bottle around 7, woke to feed at 11 and 3 then up just before 7) not awful I know but he used to from bedtime till about 2, and these double nw have been going on for a while so I don't think its a gs. I'm trying to say it could be worse but wouldn't say no to more sleep either :p
I really struggle to wake a sleeping baby so prefer not syncing for now, but 6mths, solids etc will hopefully motivate me. I wonder is there an optimal time, like if you don't sync by a certain age their body clocks won't adjust or sthg..?
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I'm sure there isn't kayra - I am now synced with the girls and I am ancient!! I found it really helpful to work v hard on rolling tummy to back in the day so they could roll back if they wanted...but I let them tummy sleep once they could roll so maybe that was what helped!
Yay Beth! Lovely to hear from you! Tough times with the NW. I hate long NW, I barely wake up with the short ones but if I do wake up properly I really struggle to get back to sleep!
The thing with the twins and the CN is that they actually sleep better on CM days....but I just cannot enforce it! Take today - we had to be out 12-1 with no alternatives so the slept 9:15-9:45 in the morning. Then....2-2:45 in the afternoon, woke up screaming, wouldn't resettle. I tried to get them to bed early but it was 6:30 before C went down and 7 before Z did. And I can feel all the old nap anxiety bubbling up..... I'll talk to the CM again on Monday and see what she thinks.
Good vibes for everyone for tonight. Am dreading it.....
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Hi Ladies! Well, we are out of the sleepy newborn phase now so time to get something organized with EASY so I don't lose my mind! Where do I even start?? The girls were born at 35+2 so not sure how this typically effects A times - experience??
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HI Kara! Have been thinking of you :)
How many weeks are they now? At that stage the only predictable thing we had was feeding every 3 hours-ish (so maybe it wasn't that predictable :p) and we'd get some kind of a nap in each cycle but dd was quite difficult in that area and ds was easier. I think we were at about 1 hour a time-in theory. Basically lots of going with the flow whilst imagining I had a routine going ;)
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They will be 8 weeks tomorrow! Adjusted age is 3 weeks though.
They came home from the NICU on a 4 hr eating cycle (the hospital had them started at 3 hrs and moved to 4 hrs by day 7! I have tried to pull them back but they won't have it! Up until just recently, they happily ate and went back to sleep until their next E time even on a 4 hr routine! It was crazy! I think our A time is somewhere between 1 hr and 1 hr 15 mins... They go anywhere from 4-6 hrs at night...
Does everyone wake the sleeping twin overnight when the first wakes to eat? I have been
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I didn't, I tried once but it was impossible to rouse him enough to feed. Then I figured they're sleeping patterns could be totally different so didn't want to mess with it. However I was getting help with nf from my parents, had I been doing them completely by myself I may have opted differently..
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Hmm, Charlotte almost always wakes first so we do wake Sophia to feed her at the same time (thankfully, she happily eats!)... I have wondered though if she would sleep a fair bit longer if left alone! I just don't want to end up where we get to the point that one twin is ready to drop all NFs yet is being woken simply because her sister is! I don't do night feeds alone, DH does feed one baby and I feed the other (we are only bottle feeding them, I didn't even try to BF the two of them... which I now regret on some level). I suspect he would be less eager to help if I only fed the one twin who woke up!
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The whole nf thing was my reasoning too, tho neither have dropped it yet ::) but overall dd is better at night than ds so..who knows.
We have a baby each at night too :) and I've told dh that when 1 does drop a feed we'll be alternating nights with the one who still has one ;)
Your must have been very tiny, which makes bf very hard, so don't beat yourself up over it. It was really hard at the beginning, and I had wanted to try ebf but soon realised that in my situation I was going to have to include formula and now that's their main food and I just bf a bit whatever few drops I have left-tho I'm starting to think it's becoming a prop for one of ds's nw..
Love the names btw :)
I know I've asked this a hundred times but how do you get them to cooperate with naps etc if they're in the same room? I'm keeping hem separate for now, but eventually they will share, how do you make that work?
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LOL Well, right now, they don't really nap at set times at all so being in the same room isn't a big deal at all... I just try to get them in the crib (they share!) whenever I can... they do sleep in the crib at night together for the majority of the night.. they were in the same bed at the hospital so we just kept up with it really. That said, we are thinking of getting their room sorted so that they can each be in their own cribs soon.
The girls weren't all that tiny actually! Sophia was 5lbs 3ozs (2350g) and Charlotte was 4lbs 14ozs (2220g). Not bad for being so early really! S was 19" and C was 18.75" tall (same as DD1 who was born at 40+2).
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Kayra it is a nightmare sometimes as they wake each other but yk I just felt it was easier from the outset. However mine took a lot of naps in their carseats at that age. It was only really at 6mths or so that things changed!
Kara those are really good weights. Mine were 5lbs 10oz and 4lbs 15oz at 38+1.
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My twins are 4 1/2 months now are are just about going through the night. I put them down for 6.30 df at 10.30 then usually they go though till 6 am but have recently started waking at 4ish to chat. Sometimes for over an hour! They aren't cold or hungry. We aren't on a set routine (desperately trying)! They are in their own room.
Very loose routine
6am wake (don't go in till 6.30)
7am 6 oz - don't always want this bottle!
7.30/45 nap 30 mins
10am nap 30 mins
11am 6 oz
12pm nap 30 mins
1.30 nap 30 mins
2.30 6oz
3.30 nap 30 mins
6pm 6oz
6.30 bed
Df 10.30 6 oz
Looking at it it looks like I'm doing EASYSY
Arrrgghh!! Any advice please?
Thanks
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Just a quick one as I'm at work....but hi everyone!! :-*
I will come back and tell you about how we got them to sleep in the same room.....but I just wanted to say to Kara (and kayra!) that BFing twins is hard, formula is a brilliant way to feed them!! I BF mine but I feel VERY STRONGLY (don't i, kayra?!) that it really isn't that important in the grand scheme of things, and I get MASSIVE RAGE if I think any mum (twins or singleton) is feeling bad about not BFing. As long as the babies are fed, loved and cleanish then everyone is doing brilliantly. And we all deserve some biscuits and a back rub.
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Hear hear Liz :) and bring on the biscuits and chocolate and cake... :)
Kara, do you find that your twins kind of sync more easily because they're identical? I think everyone else here is fraternal.
I just want to say that I'm totally enjoying my 2 right now, didn't think I'd be saying that, but they're just smiley and cute :) dd is generally just content to sit in the bouncy chair except for evenings when she'd rather be held. Ds is more on the go but still fairly easy to entertain. They bring a smile to the face of anyone who sees them, at church they're passed around b/c everyone wants a turn to hold them and they cope well for the most part. I'm not fooled to believe that it will always be so pleasant but right now they're delightful :)
Looking forward to hearing more same room stories, Laura is it generally the same one who wakes the other? Is it on purpose now that they're bigger?
Kate, did you start a thread about your 2?
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I did but haven't had a reply from anyone yet x
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Will pop over and look, did you see my comments on the birthclub thread?
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No don't think so. Don't come on here very often so still trying to get to grips with it. Please don't think I'm ignoring you x
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Didn't think that, no worries :) :-*
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Mine do sync fairly easily, yes. Identicals do have similar metabolisms so for the most part, they wake within 15 mins or so of each other overnight and during the day.
Liz - yes!
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Popping in for virtual biscuits! Mine synced eventually but it was a LOT of work and a lot of buggy naps to get them into the swing of things. wRT sharing a room....I basically waited until my better sleeper (Z) was ill or teething or something and not sleeping well, and put them together then. My reasoning was that I may as well bite the bullet when everything was bad, and at least I was in the same room dealing with both!
We are having awful nights here. And pretty bad naps. I know babies sleep badly when they are learning to crawl and things, could it be because they are learning to talk? Or am I clutching at straws!! ;D
Laura,
I've just joined the 12-18 month thread - come and keep me company!! And Kate, I'll go and bump your thread now.
Love and chocolate!!
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*passing round some cake*
Interesting system Liz, so was it a bit of a mess when they started sharing? Did things kind of settle after Z was back to normal?
Could it be a wonder week Liz? There's supposed to be one around 55, 64 and 75 weeks.
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Just popping in for a glass of wine! Please tell me this will get easier... had a good cry a few days ago.. babies were both screaming and so was the toddler.. good times!
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Have a top up Kara! I have huge respect for you, I had my parents the first 3 months and that's what kept me sane, not to mention my oldest is 2 yrs older than yours. It truly does get better though, I think 15 weeks was a turning point for us, and then 4 months has been good despite a bit of sleep regression at first. I found that as their a times got to 1.5 hours and they started self settling it made a huge difference. Big big hugs!!!!
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Hugs Kara. It does eventually get easier and I just can't believe my boys are now over a year!
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I can't believe it either Laura - I am sure I just read that you found out it was twins! Today has been a bit better, thankfully!
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Hi everyone
Haven't been around for ages, sorry. No real news - still on 2 naps (they are the oldest 2 nappers in history!) and still having awful EWs. My CM and I have chatted about it and I think as soon as they are over this latest cold/teeth/clocks changing we are going to try and stop the AM catnap.
How is everyone else??
Xxx
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Well we've been on one nap now for ages and finally they generally sleep quite well at nap time. I'm in the process of dropping milk in the night in the hope they'll start sttn. They're both walking properly. It's funny how with one you help them to walk but with two they do it themselves then don't want help!
Kara how are you? Hoping things more settled.
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How's everyone doing, sorry I haven't posted much - does everyone else feel as exhausted as I do? I wake up dreaming of going back to bed!
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does everyone else feel as exhausted as I do? I wake up dreaming of going back to bed!
Yep!
Both of mine have hand foot and mouth...yuk! Miserable as sin and nothing will calm them. I've got the easy job today - being at work!
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I think about my bed all the time!!!! Laura, I hope they settle down soon. We haven't had any of those kiddie viruses yet and I just think we will get them all at once....probably at Christmas!!!!
Anyone else really struggling with them fighting?!? Pattern of my day - C pulls Z's hair, just because. Z cries, I comfort her, tell C "gently with Z, you love her" and model gentle hands. Z bites C. I comfort C, tell Z - "if you feel like biting, bite a toy" and give her one to bite. C pulls Z's hair again while I am changing a revolting nappy. I try to use my feet to keep them apart whilst holding Z down on the mat with my elbows and trying to stop poo going everywhere. Z goes mental and slashes C's face with her deadly little nails. C is bleeding. Poo is everywhere. Both girls inconsolable. Doorbell rings, I answer it with one crying toddler in my arms and the other welded to my leg. Postman gives me funny look and a parcel for next door. Wrinkles his nose at the smell wafting out! I cheerily wave to my neighbour (who has one baby, who has STTN since 3 months old and is always happy), close the door and bribe the girls with custard creams to leave each other alone while I clear up. And repeat, all day!!!
Any tips gladly welcomed!!!!
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I have something similar although not quite as bad. H takes j's toys/food whatever. J cries gets a cuddle. J gets his own back when h is having his nappy changed!
They do playfight though too which is quite funny!
Atm it's just whinge moan whinge cry moan moan whinge... Sigh.
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This is an awful thing to say....but won't it be nice when they can properly watch TV? Then, when they are poorly, we can all get under the duvet on the sofa and watch DVDs and eat biscuits!! c is totally uninterested in TV and z stares at it like she's been hypnotised so we don't really have it on much!! And I miss it.....
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I don't think it's awful Liz, I think it already! You're closer to that stage than I am though :P
We all have colds and I'm feeling rubbish, I just said to dh 'I don't want it to be tomorrow'. They aren't even that difficult babies but I'm just tired and feel like I've had enough for a while, like I need some kind of deadline or sthg. My sister comes next week so I'm counting down to that, after that i guess I could countdown till advent or sthg. I need sthg to look forward to I think. I'm ashamed really as like I said they're good babies and gorgeous and smiley despite all the snot. Tbh I find ds1 more tiring I think!
Our big news is that we've put them in the same room! My parents were here last week and we were talking about it, then my dad said lets do it while I can help shift furniture and suddenly it all happened! They don't seem to be bothering each other at all so far, and I've got my room back!! Now that they're sharing I will try to sync them more but the fact that it will mean having to wake a sleeping baby gives me cold feet....
Laura hand&foot soumds awful, you poor things!
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Foot and mouth is actually quite common, my friends kids all had it recently - it's not the stuff that farm animals get ;D
But it is knackering when they are ill - our big twin had a temperature the other day and I slept in the bed next to her, she was recently diagnosed with a heart condition called SVT where her heart races and her trigger was having a temperature...so we are so worried that it might happen again.
Liz - I can't wait to sit in our pj's and watch Christmas TV with a warm drink and the lights down low. It'll be so cool but I think that won't be for another 2 years :-\
Laura and Liz - my two constantly hit each other, particularly during nappy changes, I have to stop myself laughing because they do these baby windmills and run away, but today we had a breakthrough when we talk little twin to stroke her sisters face instead of hit it, when she thought I wasn't looking she tried to investigate her sisters eyeballs with her nails.
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Hello everyone! Things are hit and miss here... overall, we are on the right path! I haven't been too strict with EASY at all this time around.. the poor babies get dragged around on account of DD1s activities etc so we have just followed their lead for the most part - keeps them happy and thankfully, well rested!
This has been our day for the past 3-4 weeks now:
Wake 745am
E: 8am
S: 9/915 - 10/1015am (short, I know but we are often on the go in the morning)
E: 12noon
S: 1215/1230-3/330pm (a whopper but they need it after the shorter AM nap)
E: 4/415pm
S: 5-6pm (if I am lucky they sleep an hour but it's often 40 mins)
E: 7pm and bedtime
They sleep from 730pm until 430am, eat and go back to bed until almost 8am!
Of course, we are currently dealing with a reflux flare and I have no idea if it relates to growth, a cold, or the new bottles we are now using. Ugh.
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Sounds really good Kara, we'll done! :)
Nippo sorry to hear about your dds heart condition how is she doing?
We're doing pretty well, 3 naps, one generally around 2hrs and then sometimes 2 45min ones, or 1 45min 1 a bit longer. Bedtime has got a lot easier thankfully, I've been able to put hem down by myself as has dh, so that's encouraging. Ds hasn't got up for a nf for about a week now, dd didn't for a few days but got up last night just before 4, I can live with that!
Getting out by myself is still a bit of a challenge but we do do it.
A part of me is curious about how life will be when they're more mobile but a part of me is enjoying the last few weeks/months of them staying put :P we've bought these colorful plastic fence things we will be able to make play areas for them. Is that what everyone else did or did you just do major baby proofing?
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I can't wait until we are done with NFs! Getting there ;)
I forgot to mention - Sophia is a great self-settler and always really has been.. Charlotte is a touchy wee thing so Sophia has learned fairly quickly! And we finally had a breakthrough with Charlotte - she was beside herself for nap yesterday morning so I got her swaddled first to help her settle with the intention of giving her a bit of a gentle rocking to help her drift off (I put her down drowsy most of the time).. while I went to get Sophia swaddled, Charlotte happily closed her eyes and stayed asleep! She has done great with a bit of shushing from then on!
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Why won't mine sttn... :(
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Lots of hugs Laura. c doesn't really sleep through any more either. Do you want to post your EASY or are you all tweaked out?
Kara, good work on the self settling! At that age I was either BFing to sleep or pushing in the pram. Sounds like you are doing brilliantly!
Kayra - how are things?
Nicky - lots of hugs. If your baby is poorly you have to be with her. Is it something she will grow out of?
As for us....I have been feeling bad about how I treat C :'( in my head she is a "big girl" and z is still a baby, and I think I am too tough on her. She has been ill for a few days and has really wanted cuddles and to sleep with me....and I have realised what a snuggly little chubby baby she still is. I think it's hard with twins because you can't help but compare them, and C is so spirited where Z is pretty relaxed. But I just want to make it up to her for being mean mummy. I love them both so much....but sometimes twins is so hard, you know?
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Sorry to hear that there's still no joy in that department :( you must be exhausted! Things do change tho so don't despair
Aww Liz don't be hard on yourself. Though I totally understand what you mean, not just with ds1 but with the twins ds is so sunny and gurgly I love hanging out with him whereas dd is more touchy and fragile so I'm not sure what to do wth her :P also she's constantly dribbling and spitting up after her feed which drives me batty so I feel that I have less patience for her :-[
Sleeping in the same room is going well it seems, have I said how happy I am to have my room back :)
My sister comes tomorrow, only for 3 days but I'm trying to focus on the fact that she is coming rather than not staying long, so anyway I'm excited about that, I enjoy the babies so much more when there's someone else cooing over them too :)
Hope C feels better soon.
Anyone know how Beth is doing?
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Hi
I don't think it's the routine... BUT I got rid of the nf 3 weeks ago, then they had their injections, got hand foot and mouth and now having the relevant reactions to their injections... We haven't gone back to the bottle at night but they've been having paracetamol due to temperature and pain in the night when they wake. It's minimum interaction - calpol and back to bed but they're probably still waking twice each. I'm so tired. J is cutting bottom molars (nearly through) and that'll mean H is soon to follow. I'm hoping that when the jabs have settled and the teeth are through it'll help???
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Hey everyone, so hard to find enough time to write a decent response but I do read everyone's posts!!
Laura, we had the dreaded 1 year jabs and had the worst time sleep wise and mood wise too. My usually sweet and lovely girls started hitting and got quite aggressive and clingy. It lasted ages and I remember getting really worried that all those stories about long term side effects were true. They also wouldn't nap unless I held them and wouldn't sleep at night unless I stayed with them. It took ages to be able to put them down and leave the room! You're not alone.
Kara - sounds like you've got it sussed, good on you!
Liz and Kayra, the heart condition doesn't really affect her day to day. Her heart speeds up randomly and so we just have to look out for it but for the most part it's not dangerous unless it goes on for hours, then the heart muscle can get tired. The first and only time it was triggered in hospital when she had bronchiolitis and was given asthma meds which sped up her heat. I think for us, when she is ill we feel a little nervous. But she will live a normal life. At 5 she'll have a procedure that will burn away an extra bit of tissue that is effectively short circuiting her heart.
AFM - we're still in the midst of re-sleep training our girls. Last week both were unwell so we held them to sleep. And little twin slept with me one night after being sick and having a high fever. Now morning naps are fraught as they both want me to rock them and scream the place down.
I've had to ask my dad to pop round so I can put one down then the other. And they have been waking up twice a night which came to a head last night and we started the sleep training again. We are just too exhausted now and their wakeups have increased.
They are dropping a nap but they are dropping the afternoon nap instead of morning nap. So I'm slowly pushing the morning nap to 11 which will get them through the rest of the day. All this sleep stuff is exhausting!!
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Hello ladies, how is everyone?
We are 6.5 months can you believe it?! :) we've started solids, ds loves it whereas we're going a bit more slowly with dd. She is doing a lot better with her sitting, ds has a harder time, both have amazing shoulder/arm strength from tummy time and they both 'swim' on the floor, manage to move backwards and end up half under he sofa, but no proper crawling yet. I kind of wish they'd sit properly at least as I think they'd be a lot happier if they had that independence. Naps are absolutely ridiculous these days, they're playing nap relay so I've had hardly any baby-free time these days! Makes it tempting to sync them but it's such a big deal when one has a decent nap that I couldn't possibly wake the sleeping one. Hopefully once were done with the ww things will settle down a bit.
How did you guys go about preparing solids? I need to get more organized about making batches and freezing them, it kind of complicates things when they're not quite at the same stage.
Also, you know how once upon a time I said I didn't mind the nappy changing, scratch that! Seriously I have been changing pooey nappies allllllll day, my hands are worn from being washed! At least they're relatively less leaky due to all the solids ::)
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Hey Kayra, sounds like things are going really well. With feeding, I had an easy twin and a difficult twin and one point blank refused solids for weeks before accepting and then was on puree up until about a month ago!
Steamed lots of different veg and pureed and froze into pots. That way I could mix up different foods and create a meal. As time went on I pureed for less time so it was still a bit lumpy and would just mixed different pots together.
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Struggling! It's just never-ending isn't it with two. You think it'll get easier as they get older but they're into EVERYTHING. Plus their sleep is still shocking.
Kayra with the solids we would basically cook everything in the same pan and blend. A bit like soup and freeze in pots which had enough to feed two. Not much variety but then they can't have much anyway.
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Tell me about shocking sleep. Now 1.42 am and I am wide awake listening to little twin get up for the 4th time in 2 hours. DH is fast asleep exhausted from the first two wakeups. So this time it's my turn. Only she doesn't let me go back to bed like daddy, she wants me to stay until she falls asleep. I've managed to sneak out after 45mins but can still hear her rolling around in there...
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I'm so with you hun. And then the other wakes who then wakes the first one. Then my 6yr old wakes. Rinse repeat. Shattered. Plus they wake at 5am ish so dh gets up with them. I have a sleep thread in toddler sleep if anyone fancies helping me. I'm sinking.
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Where have my blissful sleeping babies gone.??!!
Rose and Jude turned 7 months on Saturday. I feel like they are completely different babies. They are very good at settle themselves to sleep but at the moment Jude is ok at sleeping (ish) but rose fights each nap especially her last one. We've been working on dropping the 3rd nap but this has been proving difficult this weekend. Our schedule at the moment is:-
5am -6pm wake up.
7am milk
7.45 food
8.30 8.45 Nap approx 30-1hr long
11am milk
11.45 food
12.30 nap 30 - 2hrs used to be a blissful 2hrs!
3pm milk
3.30 or 4.15 nap depending on what time they woke from Lin
4.30 ish food
6 milk and bed
I would love your advice on how I'm going wrong and what I can tweak. I think they are both teething which I know isn't helping but I don't know how to get back to putting them down later for their morning nap. It used to be 9am onwards but now dos they wake so early I'm having to put them down early. Vicious circle!
Many thanks
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Hugs Kate, no advice really, we're in 3-2 territory too, so naps are an absolute mess :and ds is ew'ing :) have you tried feeding them when they wake up to see if they'll sleep a bit more? Or maybe you just ned to soldier ion to push that first nap.. Ds has been refusing a 3rd nap even if he's just had 2 silly naps which is frustrating, not sure what to do myself.
Laura, sorry things are so rough, I had a peek at your thread but honestly couldn't think of anything helpful or different than what others have suggested. Have you been able to try any of the suggestions?
On a positive note, I do love to see them giggling at eachother :)
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Yeah I have tried feeding them a few times but it's not worked. Grr it's so frustrating but yes you are right it's so lovely to see them giggle together x
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Two set naps and push through the ot. The only thing which vaguely helped! Plus calpol!
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What time should the set naps be? 9 am for the first one? haha yes we use calpol! x
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What is their approx. A time?
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Roughly 2hrs 30
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They might be able to cope with more, try 2:40, ds has increased his a time recently and it's making 2 naps more possible. I'm still trying to figure dd out :P
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Yeah I've been thinking today that they might be able to cope with more awake time
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Roughly 2hrs 30
I would bump that up to 2 hrs 45mins for a few days and see how they do ;)
It seems mine are fixing to be just like big sister... silly A times and early nap dropping. Ugh. They are 4.5 months (3.5 adjusted) and are already between 1hr45 and 2 hrs. And they fight their catnap like it is the devil some days! Thankfully, they do take it though! Bedtime has been a bit trying the last couple of weeks as well... they are really hard to get settled for a couple of hours! It's not like an OT issue, just hard to get into a good sleep. I do wonder how much of the issue is that we are quick to intervene for fear they wake each other (if one has gone to sleep already) or worse yet, wake DD1 who is just down the hall! With her, I let her settle herself a bit more, I think.
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I do wonder how much of the issue is that we are quick to intervene for fear they wake each other (if one has gone to sleep already) or worse yet, wake DD1 who is just down the hall!
THIS!!! This is the hardest part that people with singletons don't understand! Especially if you are on your own with twins and another one.
I would try the longer A times too, but personally I am a massive fan of set naps. So you could try for 9am and 1pm especially as they're 7mths.
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Yes the waking paranoya is frustrating! Though
I must admit that there have been many times when the sleeping baby has jut slept thrubthe
Crying of the other baby. I try to just be near by so i can get
A feel for whether the sleepig one might be disturbed
And try not to intervene unless it looks risky. Amazingly ds1 has never woken up b/c of them, doesnt stop me being paranoid though :P
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Hi! I'm new to all of this, my twins are four months old today (born 3 weeks early though) and I'm a first time mom. I read a little bit of the baby whisperer book and I love the idea of a routine, but I'm a bit lost at how to get there.
Twin A seems to have developed a bad habit of only taking 2 to 3 ounces of formula at a time. For a while he was taking larger feedings at night, so I wasn't too worried about it, but now he's doing it at night too, which means waking up every 2 to 2.5 hours. Do I just have to let him scream to get him on a longer feeding interval?
Twin B I think would be on a better schedule by now, except that he is waking for a second night feeding at around 5 or 5:30 am, and that throws the whole day off. And then I keep trying to get their routines to match up at least somewhat, so that we can leave the house etc.
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Hi Dorothy! You'll enable to get a lot more help if you start a thread on the Easy board. Is A eating that frequently during the day as well? Is it possible to settle him without a feed at night so that he's hungrier next time he wakes? Like I said posting on the main boards would be the best really..
I still haven't attempted to match the routine of my 2, for now we're just still rolling with it :) those early feeds are annoying, does he settle for a smaller feed? Mine will settle for a sma,, feed but won't take more when they ale 1-1,5 hr later so I've started to make that a full feed and just go with it as best I can...
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Thanks Kayra. I've been reading the main board, there's a ton of info to get through already.
We're doing pretty well I think, I just started getting strict with the routine two days ago and napping and feeding are falling into place (I think.) I am putting them both down for naps and bedtime together, even though that means one twin is often keeping the other awake for awhile. I figure that this is our goal so I'll start there. We only have one bedroom for them, so they're going to have to learn to go to sleep together. They are in the same playpen for naps and the same crib at night.
I do feel like I need to treat EASY more like a schedule than a routine though, because with two babies I can't really follow their lead or we'll just end up in chaos again. We're doing the three hour program. Twin B seems like he'd rather eat on a four hour schedule, but he isn't ready to stay awake longer, so I'm not sure what to do about that. Should I reduce the amount I give him in a bottle? Right now he often isn't hungry yet at the 3 hour mark.
I'm also not doing PU/PD because it just makes them furious. I'm doing a cross between Ferberizing and shush-pat, where I go in every few minutes and try to shush them down again. Twin B is already good at going to sleep on his own, just because that is his preference - he cries when he's tired and just wants to be put to bed. Twin A prefers to be rocked to sleep, so this is all new to him and he's angry about it.
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Just popping in to welcome you Dorothy :). But just to be clear that we do not support any form of controlled crying/CIO/Ferberizing on this forum, Tracy Hogg (the author of the BW books) was very much against leaving LOs to cry alone as she believed that it could damage the bond of trust between LO and caregiver. If it is a mantra cry that is a different thing and fine to leave LO alone, but if he is really crying for you then please do go to him. If you have any questions about this then please do post on the main boards :)
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My dd liked to be rocked to sleep too, and ut was right around 4 months when she started to respond to shh-pat, so hang in there! She still needs to be rocked if she's really unsettled at night..
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Just popping in to welcome you Dorothy :). But just to be clear that we do not support any form of controlled crying/CIO/Ferberizing on this forum, Tracy Hogg (the author of the BW books) was very much against leaving LOs to cry alone
Ah, ok, got it. Sorry. I stayed in the room yesterday and both boys are settling down much faster for naps. Twin B will cry himself to sleep, but it's only a few minutes, and I think it's the mantra cry because it doesn't escalate, it winds down. Twin A needs a bit more help but I'm still very happy with how much progress we are making with naptimes. It's only happened once, but I did hear one of them wake briefly and resettle themselves yesterday. They woke up again 15 minutes later, but still, that is amazing since they never did it before.
Unfortunately night time sleep seems to have gotten worse for twin A. We aren't doing dream feeds because we go to bed ourselves at 9 so that we can get enough sleep. Twin B wakes up once around 1 or 2 am for a feeding, then sleeps until around 6 am, but Twin A is waking up every 3 hours and only taking 2 to 3 ounces of formula. I hope this will pass once they get used to the routine. I feel like our day is so much more relaxed when I have a plan for what happens when. I think I'm going to switch to the 4 hour schedule in January when they hit 4 months adjusted.
Both boys sleep in one crib right now and I feel like they like to be together, but they are getting more mobile and rolling into each other. We have them in our bedroom, and if we switch to separate cribs they'll need to be in their own room instead and I don't feel ready for that either. At what age did you go to separate cribs?
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We did separate cribs quite early on, can't imagine them being in the same bed now :) they were in separate rooms till 2 months ago! :)
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Moved ours to separate cots at 8wks. But they'd been sharing in their own room from about 3wks. We only had room for a Moses basket in our room which they shared for a while-so tiny-so cute!
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Mine are almost 5 months now and still share a crib in our room ;) They have a second crib in their bedroom that they share during the day for naps as well. They are close to being too tall to fit in the crib together though and I can't put them end to end since we have them elevated because of reflux. So, they may have to move rooms soon and be in their own cribs! I'm not ready to move them though :( Oddly enough, DD1 was in her own room alone at 13 weeks!
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Quick question: Did you find that your twins were on an adjusted easy depending on their due date. B/G twins both born 5.6lbs but came early which is the norm. So my quesion would be if they are 3mth Jan 7th would I follow a 3mo Easy or a 2mo easy?
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That's a good size! How early were they? Sorry I couldn't quite work that out from the post.
Mine were born at 38wks but cos they were tiny we followed approx 2.5hr routine to begin with. But we couldn't get them on a propersroutine till about 6mths!
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Mine were 3 weeks early, I kind of do both really, I have rough idea of what they could/should do at the age they are but also check out what it would be for the adjusted age, try to follow their cues, take an average :P haven't got it figured out in any way though!
How is everyone? I'm feeling a bit low after having family here for 2 weeks for Xmas :( doesn't help that the babies are being a bit grumpy, getting up at night again and hard to figure out a time/nap-wise.... ::)
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They were 36wk 3days, they are Eating every 3.5 hours but sleeping every 1.15-1.30hr for 2hrs, and then sometimes it's hard to wake baby boy for his E time. I Don't want it to impact their night sleep which seems to be coming along their last E time is 10:30 and then sleeping till 6, which 7.5hr night.
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Kayra- Sorry to hear your feeling down:( having family for long periods is tough!!!
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I'm down because they've gone ;) thanks though :)
I think their routine sounds good, I wouldn't wake him at 10:30pm to feed him (if that's what you meant), you could df or just wait till he wakes.
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Mine were born at 35+2 and in the NICU for 10 days (Special care over in the UK i think!).. they were on a 4 hr routine when they came home at 36+4 ;)
I have always just followed their lead though with a mind to keeping them on a 4 hr routine. We aren't EASY right now though and haven't been for a while.. they have settled into a nice routine for about 6 weeks now (so I expect all to go upside down soon!)
This is us now at 5 months (4m adjusted)
nightfeed 430am (ranges 330-5am but 430 is the most common)
A: wake 730am
E: 830am
A:
S: 930-1015am (ah yes, the 45 min naps have hit but they work for us right now!)
E:12pm (they have recently started demanding to eat a touch earlier than their typical 4 hrs
S: 1230-3pm (I suspect this monster nap is to compensate for the AM short nap)
A:
E: 330pm
A:
S: 430-515pm
A:
E: 7pm and bedtime by 715/730pm (depends a bit on big sister and if I am alone or if DH is here to help). They sleep through until their nightfeed typically.
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What a gorgeous routine Kara, I'm jealous!!! Do you wake to sync them during the day ?
We're quite lost these days ::)
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Kara yours are identical aren't they? I've heard its much easier to get them doing the same thing.
Kayra what does your day look like?
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Good question Laura, but it's so messy I don't know how to answer it :P
These last 2 days they've been waking an hour apart from eachother (in the morning) I should probably wake the sleepig one but just don't have the heart!! So I want gem to be on 2 naps but can't really figure out the a times, but overall it's sthg like
Wu 7, bottle unless they had a nf around 5/6
8:30 breakfast
9:30 nap (dd will often do 1.5 hr but then sometimes 45min, ds often 45 min sometimes 1.5hr ::) )
Bottle at wake up
12 lunch
This nap is hard to say, depends on their first one so could be 1, 1:30, 2...
If they wake before 3 I try for a 3rd nap soon after
Bottle at wake up
5dinner
6:30 bottle, in bed by 7 generally
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We always woke the sleeping one in the morning within 20mins else it'd stress me out too much and I couldn't rely on them being the same amount of tired to nap the same iyswim?
You might find you have more success with naps if you do that. Also can u apop the one which wakes back to sleep ? We still do thisnnow during nap time.
Eta they sleep well at night though unlike mine...sigh
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It's rare that I can settle them if they've woken from a nap, I mostly don't bother trying anymore unless it looks really hopeful. Yes especially in the morning I think I will start waking the sleeping one,my it's one thing for naps but it's a pain to start the day like that.
Today they were so grumpy in the morning they barely made it past 2 hours!! Ds had a decent nap dd a short one...
They're nights are good overall, we picked up a nf last month but that seems to be sorting itself out in the last couple of nights.
Hugs for the bad nights Laura, if one is bothering the other any chance you could separate their rooms for a while to see if you can sort th other out?
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Mine are identical yes! I don't wake sleeping babies except for night feed ;) I credit their routine to the NICU nurses - they had them on a 4 hr routine in 4 days time! I have just followed their lead with naps and timing though... I am much more go with the flow than I was with DD1! I don't worry about them much at all if they short nap etc. Just last night, they refused to take a CN so I just kept them up and put them to bed early. Meh - the world won't end ;) As it was, they were out cold by 630pm, woke to eat at 330am and then slept until 730/745am. I don't clock watch at all.. I follow their signs with a mind to average nap times. I don't use A time at all.
That said, if one shows tired signs, they both go to bed!
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Interesting Kara, so how on earth do you manage to keep them on the same routine if you're not waking them? They automatically sleep and wake at the same time?!
I'm definitely more laid back this time, but it's hard when there's a lot of 1 up 1 down or both can't stay awake for equal amounts etc.
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Kayra apparently yes identicals do pretty much stay on the same routine!
1 up 1 down is such a pain. At the age your two are now I would do fixed naps and if they short nap stick with a fixed time for second nap. They'll adjust and body clock will get used to sleeping at a set time. Sometimes you just have to do these things yk?
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Yes I've been thinking about that too, any sort of calculating I do for a times doesn't seem to work anyway ::)
If wake up is 7ish, I'm thinking nap at 10 and 2? I'd rather 2:30 so that if they do do a silly nap it's just that bit closer to bt but if they have a silly nap at 10 I dont know if they (or I :P ) could cope 3+hrs...
They've just been so fussy in the mornings these days, it's going to take a lot of stamina to keep them for 3 hrs! I will give it a try tomorrow with dh home to help if they're really grumpy.
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That sounds about right. If they short nap the 10am put them down a touch earlier. Then do early bed if necessary. Once they're on fixed naps I found it easier to wake the sleeping one usually up to 20mins after would still mostly keep them together. Just looked at our 2 nap days at around 10mths though was wake 6ish nap 10 and 2.45.
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Thanks Laura that's encouraging :) I also like the 20mim grace period ;)
Let's see how today goes, they were both awake just before 7, I went in at 7 and did their bottles in turn in the dark for min stimulation and till breakfast I will try to keep lights low.
How are you?
How is everyone?
Xxxx
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Why low lights till breakfast? I just get mine up after 6am then they have their bottles downstairs. Especially if they're in bed by 7pm.
I honestly would also avoid at all costs a late catnap now. Just do earlier bed.
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Because they've been barely managing 2.hr in the am and I want to push them to 3..lights weren't too low, just not full on bright lights.
Yeah I'm not trying catnaps anymore ;)
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Oh I'm with you now! How did it go?
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Well they managed the first a pretty well but only slept half an hour and woke up very grumpy, it was quite the chorus of moaning the first hour ::) after lunch they cheered up a bit then before their nap we gave them another bottle so they settled quickly just before 2, ds slept 1hr15 dd 1.5 hr. So not too awful. We were out in the evening so weren't abile to do ebt but hopefully that won't be too much of a problem, it's not that unusual for them to have a longer than ideal a time before bed.
I will definitely soldier on with this, I was getting silly naps anyway so at least this way they'll be in sync and I won't have to be doing calculations all day-math was never my forte and having to so it for 2 babies is no fun :P
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Honestly it'll pan out in the end and def takes the stress out of it a bit!
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Laura is right :) Identicals do stay on the same schedule fairly easily :) If one baby wakes, the other seems to notice that she is missing and will be awake by the time I am downstairs and changed the bum of the first typically.
That said, today is a good example of what happens if they get off course!
Both had a similar first nap after waking at the same time this morning... second nap, C woke after 2 hrs and we chose to wake S at the 3 hr mark. C took her catnap of 40 mins and was up for 30 mins before S even went down for her catnap.. she slept 35 mins and was up for only 1hr 15m before bedtime.. both went down easily.
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3hr nap??!! What is one of those!
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I'm drooling over here Kara :P
Something has occurred to me in regard to set naps...if I'm doing set naps regardless of a time, then I don't need to wake the sleeping twin do I? Next nap they're going to go down at the same time anyway...?
I've also realized I problem with my set nap times...in that it's fine if the first nap is short (which I don't necessarily want) but if they do nap properly, like dd who had a 1.5 hr nap this morning waking at 11:30, then a nap at 2 is potentially too early for her...but I can't set it to later b/c if the am nap is short they can barely make to to 2 anyway (like ds today) so should I think of the 2nd nap as 2 or 2:30 depending on the first nap??
Feeling fed up :(
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Kayra I'd set your nap times based on the ideal. So if ds short naps you can put him down say 20mins before dd. But you're working towards what you want else you may as well not bother! Did you do set naps with ds1? It does work. It's like eating at the same time every day. Your body gets hungry at that time regardless! If they slept 1.5hrs for the first nap what time would you need the second one to be? Hang in there.
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I guess closer to 3 hours later..I don't really know to be honest but if after a good nap they were to have a silly nap at 2 it would just be a long time till bed. We'll see I guess, I need to be consistent with these set naps for a while and see how it goes. So once their body clock is set, ideally it's based on the time of the nap rather than when spy hey started the day, isn't it? Meal times are basically fixed
I don't think I did do set naps with ds1, he would mess around too but on the whole I seem to remember that he was a good napper but he was an ew'er which wasn't fun!
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We are making the shift to two naps here... it's rough just like I remember from DD1 ;) They need to learn to transition to a second cycle during their first nap! They can, they just don't. So, I am pushing first nap out a bit at a time until the do lengthen it out a bit.. they are waking happy as a lark at 45!
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You have my sympathies Kara!! And you're much braver than me, we've only been on 2 proper naps for 2 weeks now and didn't start transitioning till 6months+
You'll be there eventually, pushing that first A is brutal though, especially if they're like mine in preferring a short A time first thing. It is nice to be in 2 naos now, especially since ds has finally cracked crawling (he's been working in it for a good month) which means after awful naps and nights for good long while he is now sleeping well again :) dd seems to have no interest in crawling but gets quite cross when ds goes off and leaves her alone!! What's you guys' experience with one twin becoming mobile before the other?
Hope everyone's well, very quiet here...everyone busy or sthg? ;)
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Hello! Could do with some advice please? My 8 month twins are slowly starting to get to a 2 nap day! I hate the 3rd nap! 😛 if they wake up at 2 after a 1hr 30 nap would you put them down for a cat nap? If not what time would you put them to bed? Ours days currently look like this...
WU 6ish (earlier if they had 3rd nap day before)
Nap 9.15/30 30 mins
LTN 12.15/30 1hr 30 - 2hrs
Cat nap 4.30 10 mins
Bed 6.30
On days they don't cat nap I put to bed at 5.30 ish and they still sleep till 6 which is great.
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Mine became mobile within days of each other. They do everything within about 2 days. H usually first then j copies.
Kate I wouldn't bother with catnap if they sleep well at night!
We're going to be on no nap before I know it!
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2 naps are hard when one of the naps is so short, do you think that morning one is ut or ot? We"re doing 3hr at the moment, might it be worth trying that to see if they'll do a better nap? Or if you feel that's too short try a tad longer? That way you could start the afternoon nap closer to 1:30-2 meaning you can get to a better bedtime.
No nap Laura?? Seems so early for that! Ds1 napped till he was 3.5!
Dd doesn't look anywhere near moving, interesting about your boys Laura, I'd heard that about identical twins but not fraternal ones.
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What is the a time you have for yours if they have a long mn?
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I just keep the, on 3 hrs, so right now we're doing (assuming wake up is 7)
Nap 10-11:30 (today was 11:20)
Food, play etc
Nap 2:30-4 (today was 2:20, dd didn't settke till 2:40 so she went till 4:10)
A
Bt 7
If they have a short morning nap I'll do the 2nd nap earlier but as close to 2 as possible so that wake up is as late as possible b/c I don't like doing very early bedtime.
Dd is generally lower on A times than ds but b/c ds is crawling now he's really ready for his sleep!
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We've been doing EASY for a month now, and I'm still having to wake at least one boy up in the morning. My ideal wake up time is 7 am, but I often let one sleep until 7:30 so I can have time to feed and have some one on one time before the madness starts.
It just feels so wrong to wake a sleeping baby, and I'm tempted to just see how long they will sleep.
We're still getting a lot o short naps during the day, they go down for a third nap at 4 pm and I usually have to wake them from that one too. Wake up at 5:30, then 7:30 is bedtime.
Usually our day is something like:
7/7:30 Wake up (forced)
8:30 Eat
9 am Sleep
9:45 Wake up
11:30 Eat
12 pm Sleep
1:30 pm wake up
3:30 pm Eat
4 pm sleep
5:30 pm Wake Up (forced)
6 pm Eat
7 to 7:30 pm bedtime
Night feedings around 12 and 5
The eating just isn't syncing up with waking up, I'm going to try reducing the amount we feed them at the second night feeding but for now I'm just rolling with it. They won't eat unless they are hungry so "topping up" doesn't work.
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Your day is fairly typical of their age Dorothy.. I have 5.5 month old identical girls (adjusted age is 4.5 months though).. mime don't accept top-up feeds well either...
Our day:
Night feed is between 4-530am right now and they go right back to sleep
Wake up 730/8am (I never wake from night sleep except for night feed for my own sanity, thankfully, they do both eat whenever one chooses the time!)
Bottle 9am
Nap 930-1015am (I don't wake, they just always do a short nap here regardless of A time so I have left it)
Bottle 1215pm
Nap 1230-230/3pm (I don't wake)
Bottle 3/330pm
Nap 430-515pm (I don't wake unless they hit 530pm)
Bottle 7pm
Bedtime by 730pm.
I didn't really create this day at all.. I have followed their lead to some extent. I find that forcing a baby into a routine causes more issues in most cases. I just keep a mind to how long they have been up and don't feed to sleep except bedtime if it happens (my first always fed to sleep at bedtime and it never became a prop). I do have a 4 yr to manage during the day so this routine stays the same but the times do shift some days. I am super thankful that these are some very angel-minded babies!
As for us, the move to 2 naps backfired in epic proportions! Two days and it all unraveled! Trouble settling, fitful sleep and the nights, oh my god, the nights. I stopped counting how many times I was up when I got to 10 and it was only 11pm! The debauchery continued until they got up at 715 this morning.. back to 3 naps and today was much smoother! So I will cap second nap to preserve CN for now if I need to!
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Yikes Kara, yes stick to 3 naps for now, no hurry for 2 naps it's only easier when it actually is easier ;)
Dorothy are yours identical? I hate waking as well and only will if I really feel they've slept too late, I haven't really woken one to be in sync with the other,I'm just can't bring myself to doing it when I don't know if they will sleep properly the next time round. But bt is always at the same time and wake up for the day is generally not too far from eachother. Like you I find that dealing with feeds one at a time is actually easier.
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Kara - yes, sounds like we're doing about the same thing. My boys are very close in age to your girls, they just hit 5 months but are just over 4 months adjusted (born at 37.5)
Kayra - no, they are fraternal. I think Twin B needs a bit more sleep than Twin A. Or it might just be that Twin B cries when he is tired, while Twin A just gets wired. A got really overtired yesterday and it took him forever to get to sleep at bedtime. He had his eyes closed tight but was just kind of moaning to himself and frantically sucking his fingers for over an hour. We finally took pity on him and put him in the swing, and DH sang to him until he was out. I wish they would take a soother, but they hate it.
We are signed up for a baby sign language class starting in February, but I don't know how we're going to do it since it's at 1 pm and they usually go down for a nap around 12 or 12:30. There's an 11:30 class but I think that's even worse.
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It's so har when they're overtired, sounds like you did the right thing.
Yes trying to go to events around nap times is so hard :( I just look up signs on YouTube and do them with the babies, tho I'm sure it's more fun with a class.
With ds being more mobile than dd were getting various times when he ends up on her, sucking her head ( I call it a slobber attack, poor thing ends up quite wet if I don't happen to be in the room at the time!), or 'stroking' her face. There's no malice of course and it's kind of funny but dd really needs to get moving ;) it's so much fun to watch them interact though. The other day ds was drumming his fingers on his lips doing that blblrbb sort of sound and dd was giggling away at him, it was so sweet! :)
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No nap Laura?? Seems so early for that! Ds1 napped till he was 3.5!
DS1 stopped napping about 2.5yrs but these two have been on one nap solidly from before 12mths. Were switching between 1 and 2 at 9mths...
interesting about your boys Laura, I'd heard that about identical twins but not fraternal ones.
I know it's weird. What's more strange though is that when they had their feet measured their right feet were both 4.5G and their left feet 5G !! Everyone who sees them thinks they're identical but my great aunties are fraternal twins... however people couldn't tell them apart either when they were small.
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How interesting, I guess there are families where siblings which are years apart strongly resemble eachother so with twins you realise the likeness even more b/ they're the same age. Are they very similar to how O looked as a baby? Everyone thinks that ds2 is the spitting image of ds1 and there is a likeness but they are very different as well.
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They're v similar to how o looked and looks now really. J is quite similar to o as a baby but h is a new one to me!
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Here is a funny one - mine are identical and I find that Charlotte (B) is very much like DD1, where as Sophia (A) is her own person. I even think Charlotte looks more like Alexandra as a baby.. yet, they *should* both be just like her if that was the case!
We are happily on 3 naps again - harmony restored for now ::) Until it all falls apart again! I only had to wake from second nap for two days and now they do it on their own :) Smart babies!
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How funny Kara, it would seem like just when you can make a generalization one baby comes along and says, erm actually no... :P
You do have clever babies there, glad your routine is back on track for the time being. Ours of course is out of whack again, but not too awful so not complaining. I see, to get the morning nap right-ish, but they really fuss at the pm one and I can't figure out whether it's ot or ut, going to try the ut theory and but gem down later today... Dd has started shifting herself around a bit more, I guess she's been watching ds ;)
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Things are a hot mess here! I know that the girls need to move to 2 naps a day because bedtime is becoming a bit of a circus act at best! I get CN refusals too.. so we need to tweak the whole day cause they still only take a 40 min AM nap and that will not work for a 2-nap day!
So now we are:
3-5am - NF and back to sleep ASAP - still random so I know they do need it
7am - wake up, bottle depends on night feed time but is typically around 830am
930am - nap 40-45 mins
1030 - solids (just starting so it's not much)
1215/1230 - bottle and nap
3pm wake from nap
330pm bottle
515pm - CN
6pm - wake up and hang out while I finish cleaning up the kitchen and get toddler ready for bed
7pm bottle and bed... but as I type this I am listening to some growling from Charlotte - it's 8pm. She has dozed off a few times but keeps waking because she simply isn't ready for bed...
Help?!
They are 6 months, but 5 adjusted... I think they need an increase in their first A time to get that nap longer - yes?
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Haven't got much time so in a word yes! Push to 10 if you can and see what happens. Don't do the catnap at all and do early bed if poss?
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If you want to keep that catnap you could try it earlier, say 4:45?
If you want to go to 2 naps they need to be able to handle 3hr a time really, do you think they can make that jump?
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Just reading along with my mod hat on ;) but Kara you could even try just sticking with the short am nap, long lunchtime nap, drop the CN and do bed at 6/6.15 for a bit then slowly push out? Not a typical EASY routine but works for many others x
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The catnap is refused if we try any sooner than 2 - 2.5 hrs of A time so can't pull it forward since the girls just won't have it!
As for bedtime before 7pm, can't really. DH gets home around 530pm so once we all eat, I have to get DD1 off to bed with story etc for 7pm. It's quite the rush between 615 - 7pm around here! DH is in charge of the twins during that time. Also, feed times are not flexible with these two.. they won't take a top up feed and will scream the house down if I try to do a smaller feed to pull that bedtime feed earlier.
I do think they could get very close to a 3 hr A time for sure... there are times that they have managed 3.5 hrs (obviously not on purpose!)...
I went out and about today as we have been housebound for days (horrid snow/weather here now)... so they took a short morning nap at 915am (after a rough night!), woke at 10am... we ran a quick errand and I fed them at 1145... loaded the kids up and off we went! They ended up having two shorter 40 min naps this afternoon and then one again around 530 (woke them at 550)... into bed at 715 and they have been so much better tonight - I had to resettle once because someone lost her soother but that's it! Clearly, they need to be more tired for bedtime!
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We're having similar problems here - my boys have been impossible to put to bed for the past three nights. We had a great routine of bath, book, bed and they had been sleeping from 7 pm until around midnight (sometimes later) and then straight back to bed with no problems. Now, they either go to bed but are awake again an hour later, or just refuse to go down in the first place (they take turns). Last night we resorted to taking them both out for a walk at 9 pm, and they finally went down after that.
I don't know what is going on. During the day, they barely make it to 2 hours of awake time, and they are still feeding every 3.5 hours instead of 4, and draining their bottles. They're 6 months old on Feb 16th, but closer to 5 months adjusted.
They are also waking up at 6 am, where before they were waking between 7 and 7:30.
Could this be a growth spurt? They are driving me crazy.
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Dorothy 3.5hr between feeds sounds fine to me, we didn't get well established on 4hrs till at least 7 mths, it really depends on how much a time they can do and how well they're napping. Could you be I a wonderweek, that tends to mess sleep. If they're draining the bottle you could add another ounce maybe? What was their a time to bed? Waking soon after bed is often a sign of ot rather than ut if I'm not mistaken.
Kara, if you think they can handle is push their a times out then, I've always been so scared of it but when we were an absolute mess I went to set naps for a while, really pushing them out and eventually it sorted things out. We aren't on set naps as such not, but even if they ew they don't go down earlier than 10 and even if they sort nap they don't do down before 2, bt 7ish.
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Dorothy - they may go 4 hrs between feeds if they are full... draining bottles means you need to increase what you are offering.. you always want baby to stop with a bit left so that you know they are full and not just stopping because the milk ran out :) Mine have been 4 hrly for feeds since 8 days old (born at 35+2)...
We are having mixed success with 2 naps... I had planned a 3 nap day today but they have just woken from a lovely 95 min AM nap with no resettles by me! We just might be able to do 2 naps with an earlier bedtime!
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Just wondering how many of you put your twins down for naps in separate rooms? but at night are in the same room. Right now the duo are 4mo old but were born a month early. I have found that for naps they wake each other up but at night its not a problem.
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We don't usually, but I do find that they are more likely to wake eachother up from naps than at night time. I guess it just doesn't happen often enough to make us make them nap in different rooms, I'll on,y do it (and haven't for a while) if I'm putting one down later and time wise it seems likely that any sound could wake the sleeping one or the sleeping one has had a bad day and I can't risk any disturbance whatsoever, if that makes sense? If one wakes early I'll try a quick resettle and if it's not happening try to get them out the room asap, I have learnt the hard way-and kicked myself hard-that if I try to resettle too long the sleeping one is likely to be disturbed.
Sorry that was a bit long winded :P
How is everyone? We're ok, they're moving all over the house, dd still doing her commando crawl, lots of pulling up to standing too. They don't interract with eachother that much but do seem to like being around eachother and will definitely play better if together. But ds will often go off to roam which then sets dd off to although normally I think she'd be happy to just sit and play.
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We are good here... pushing through to two naps has been rough at times but we are getting there! Still up once a night for a feed between 3-430 typically but still back to sleep easily unless they wake after 5/530am as they have then been sleeping 10-10.5 hrs.
We are struggling with nap #1 though... I have been recording sleep times hoping to see something jump off the page to help solve this one but no - nothing sticks out! They act tired about 2-2.5 hrs after waking... will go down fairly well after this long... but nap 45 mins without fail. If I keep them up to 2 hrs 45 or 3 hrs, they are really tough to get settled (no chance of self-settling if up this long) and often wake after 45 mins and are crabby! Clearly need to sleep longer.. won't be APd back to sleep either... but just to keep me interested, they will randomly take a 2 hr nap! They take turns and it's totally random!
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So frustrating isn't it? And its not like you could get them down at 2.35 or 2.40 minutes on the dot either to see if those I between times would work. Hope they do a good 2nd nap at least.
We've all got colds so that's lots of fun ::) they need to sleep and rest to get better but of course they can't sleep well. Nights haven't been too bad but naps are hit and miss. It's frustrating when the first nap of the day is short both because that's my tiny bit of me time when ds1 is at school and because it brings the whole day forward :( I can't apop them back to sleep either, even if they will miraculously sleep in my arms they don't stay asleep when back in their bed. Feeling rather fed up, with longer A times now just a 30minute break just doesn't feel like a break!
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Hi ladies! I'm new to the board, but not new to using BW. I used it with my singleton who is 3 now and still a great sleeper. Now I need help with my newborn twins. I have 7.5 week B/G twins (born at 36 weeks 3 days), about 4 weeks adjusted. I have them synchronized on a 3 hour schedule. We're still waking at 2:30-3am and then 5:30am. So, ready for them to sleep a longer stretch!
My question is - How do you do the 4S Wind Down with twins? Particularly the sitting quietly for 5 minutes. My boy is big already at 11lbs. so I can no longer hold them both and lay them down in the crib smoothly without jostling them too much. I found this really helped my older one and want to be sure I'm providing a good wind down. Right now it's not happening. Any ideas or suggestions would be greatly appreciated!!
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Hi welcome and congratulations! Could you stagger them by a few minutes? Have one in the bouncy chair or sthg while you put the first one down?
I didn't even attempt sycnronise till a couple of months ago, so no btdt advice for when they're that small I'm afraid!
Xx
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Same here with synchro. Good luck!
Kayra 30mins here was always ut despite me assuming ot!
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Yeah I think you're right , altho it looks ot it's actually ut, today I gave an extra 10min and they had a good nap!
Hope things get better with the boys soon Laura! Xxx
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Kayra, thanks for the suggestion! I started trying with the swing but the second one usually falls asleep while I'm winding down the first one. I've just been trading off who goes down first so they at least get some mommy wind down time during the day. There naps have been much better since I started though. Thanks again!
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So glad to hear that it's working! Bless you being by yourself with a 3 yr old and such little twins, I hope you get those longer night stretches soon!
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Hi Twin Mamas,
I was advised by the main board to drop in here for a spot of advice.
I have been happily following Tracy's mantra since my first baby was born five years ago. I since had a second child and now almost six months ago, twins (25/09/14 at 36+3).
Recently I slipped into the '2am/5am feeding back to sleep' trap with the babies. It started with their 4 months growth spurt. With my other two I would have gently extended the times between feeds or just make them go to sleep again with shush patting. As you know with twins, it is all a bit more tricky when there is a problem. When one cries the other is often woken up and I don't know how to console two crying babies at the same time other than giving them a feed.
I can't ask DH for help as he is looking after the night wakes of the my elder two (nightmares for the five year old, overtiredness for three year old occasional napper...) and his job is quite demanding.
Does anybody know of a good trick how I can get the twins back to sleep on my own? Without feeding or rocking them.
They are 5 months and 15 days old, 6.5kg and on a four hour EASY routine (although Y should be replaced by 'time with the older kids and getting stuff done'). Tweaked and diverted here and there due to the nature of a large family and its activities (moderate ones, I'm not into lots of extra curricular stuff).
I have recently extended A times so our ordinary days look like this:
7am breast feed (often they have been awake a bit earlier)
9am back asleep (wind down starts from 8.30 depending on how tired they are and they settle by themselves between 8.45 and 9am)
11am breast feed (wake up is pretty close to this mark)
12.30 onwards wind down/settling, back to sleep by 1pm
3pm breast feed (again wake up pretty close to 3pm)
I find the next nap is sometimes tricky to catch, today it all went smoothly and they were down at 5pm. But often they are overtired when they go to bed at 7pm. I hope that extending their A time is the reason it now seems better.
Usually dream feed between 10 and 11.15pm (I feed them individually so sometimes I go over 11pm).
The nights!
In the night I have started to feed on demand (not in tandem) as I wanted to see if one was going to sleep through. But I ended up feeding every hour to two hours alternating babies.
I seem to have lost the 12.30am wake up
2-2.30 one wakes and then the other is woken and I breast feed them
I also seem to have lost the 3-4am wake when they might lie there chortling for up to an hour
5am I am now shushing when they wake and there was no wake last night (first 5hr sleep in ages for me!)
I have also moved them into separate cots (next to each other) and this is cutting out waking by whacking.
I don't think they need solids yet, they are just starting to put things in their mouths, but in a couple of weeks I will start. They take a proper feed each time they wake at night and they don't seem to be terribly hungry at 7am. It seems that they can't put themselves back to sleep at night without being fed.
Any suggestions how I can get them to sleep through by myself?
We are off camping for the weekend tomorrow and I will probably jump to feeding them at the slightest peep out of fear of waking everyone... but hopefully they will stick to their one wake, fingers crossed!
Thanks for any thoughts...
Bel
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Welcome! Sounds like you're doing an amazing job!!
One thing that occurs to me is that they seem to be getting quite a bit of daytime sleep, 2x2hr naps plus a 3rd nap is that right? Too much day sleep could be reason why they're waking in the night. At this point they shouldn't need 2 night feeds I think... If they self settle for naps it shows that they have the skills to put themselves to sleep w/o being fed even if they don't want to always use those skills ;)
If I have to deal with 2 babies in the night at the same time I opt for shh/patting the louder one or the one I think will go off the quickest. Sometimes I'll aternate between cribs, if it's crazy I'll get dh, there's on,t so much you can do by yourself! Will one or the other take a pacifier? When they were smaller I'd hold one while shying the other but not sure you could do that at this age,
Hope sthg in there helps! You're a brave woman going camping amidst all this!!! :)
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You're definitely brave for going camping. I'm on here now cos I want you girls who understand to tell me I'm doing the right thing by not going away for the wkend!
Basically we've been invited to go with my family for a Fri to Sun stay on a term time wkend at a place around an hr away. It's next month. We'd be sharing a villa with my brother who has slightly older children. My boys are still awful at night and get up early. They can't sit still at all and the villa is open plan. I just know although my family would help we would find it stressful esp trying to keep them contained or quiet. Plus we have ds1. Also the packing. I'd still be at work on Fri and Mon. I know my family won't really underprivileged cos they'll say they'll help but really? At 5am or 2am with two screaming babies.
Tell me you understand and that you think I'm doing the right thing!
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Hey Laura,
I just got back from the camping trip. We ended up going only for one night because my older daughter (3) got sick on Friday.
Staying in a tent is probably not too far off from staying in an open plan villa. My plan was from the start to BF as soon as there was a murmur, which I did. Two night feeds for the twinnies, older daughter waking and shouting for me once but settled with dad. Compared to what could have happened I'd call that an ok night.
The two days were completely all over the show with sleeps here and there and I didn't know how long they were awake each time.
But we got through it, had a great time with the people around us, and feel like we've had an adventure that'll get us through the dull week ahead.
I spoke to another twin mum at camp who said her girls only started to sleep through when she stopped feeding them at night (9mths). She is a single parent of three. She said it only took two nights, first night four hours of being up and the next just one. Then they slept through. I've done it with my two older kids but I am still worried doing it on my own with two at the same time.
Kayra, I've been thinking about your comment on too much sleep with 2x2hrs + nap. I seem to remember Tracy's recommendation having that cat nap at the end, but I am not sure as it's been so long since I read her book. I also can't be sure they actually sleep for that long as they don't cry when they wake. Sometimes I go in and realise that at least one of them must have been awake for some time. What would you say is an appropriate amount of sleep for nearly six months old twins (born 36+3)? I find it so hard to balance overtiredness and too much sleep...
I feel that I am going to have to do cold turkey re feeding at night. Does anybody have any recommendations on how to keep it as stress free as possible?
Thanks, lovely ladies! Good to hear that I am not alone...
Bel
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We stopped feeding ours by watering down the feeds as they're bottle fed. However as you can see it hasn't stopped them waking!
I think with bf you can time it and shorten the length of time. However your two are still quite little they may still need a nf for a bit?
I also agree with too much day sleep though. Try 2x 1.5hrs and a catnap or shorten the catnap to 15mins or something. Or if you think they could do it try without the catnap and do earlier bed?
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Can't paste a link right now but I think in the Easy or Activity board it has a sticky about typical day/night sleep, a times, routines for age etc.
Laura, I hear you but I would go even just for the sake of having people around me who will be helping during the day. Yes the night might be tough but it is anyway and at least during the day there will be more hands. Your family knows what your kids are like, how old they are etc so if they're encouraging you and saying they'll help d just take them up on it! I bet O would enjoy hanging out with his cousins, no?
But I do understand your qualms, I do, I just wouldn't want you to miss an opportunity that could be fun for you, however if you feel that you really won't be able to relax and it is going to be stressful for you then don't. Xxx
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It's the sharing aspect and disturbing people that will be stressful for me. Anyway long story short my mum has bkd us our own 2 bed place and the others are going to share two smaller places. It actually bizarrely works out cheaper. So I'll feel more relaxed about the boys being up and we'll still get to go and get some help in the day.
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Great solution! So glad you get less stress and help at the same time :)
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Hi do u mind if I join u's?
Boys are doing great but I want to get into some sort of proper routine with them but they are just so sleepy! They are now 21 was old and ff every 4hrs taking 5-7oz at a time. We haven't got a getting up time yet but it's between 6&7 1.5 hrs after they have been fed they want to sleep until their next feed Which I'm not sure how they can do a length of 2hrs for their age ( correct me if I'm wrong) with the way they are.
At night we Have wind down routine but it's got to be quick cos they just want to go to sleep, bath feed and bed. ( they are independent sleepers) but have a dummy. Most nights they sleep til 1am they are fed and then start stirring at 4ish, which before I just fed them but this morning I just kept rep lugging their dummies and hoped for the best! I gave up about 6. Maybe if anyone has any advice as I'm not sure with them being premature that's making them so sleep.
Thanks
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Welcome Nicola! :)
Could it be their bout of illness, so they have lots of catching up to do? How much total sleep do you think they're getting? On a good day dd is happy with about 15hr sleep and she's 10mths!
At this age 4hr easy was I'm possible for me because they couldn't do a long A time, probably the same as yours, but no way napped all the way to the next feed, often I rarely managed to get them to 3 hr since the previous feed sometimes! So sounds pretty good to me ;) and it doesn't look like its spoiling their night really...?
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Hi ladies, just needing someone to talk to... it's sometimes so tough looking after four kids, two of them being baby twins. It's night time here in New Zealand and I'm dreading the four wake ups I'm probably going to face. Humph.
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Hi, I'm maybe just thinking it's their age being premature?they were 10 wks early. I think perhaps 18-20hrs which I thought was quite a lot but considering they are 11wks really, which kind of goes with that age group.nights are pretty good ( I think!) B/time is usually 6:30/7 they will sleep til 1 and tend to feed then they take a full feed 6/7oz and then up at 5 for a feed. Does that sound OK or do u think I should d feed around 10/11pm? I can't seem to stay awake any longer than 8:30!
Hi bell how is your night going? Your doing well looking after 4!
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Nicola that sounds good to me. If you're going to have to get up for a df anyway it's really not worth it, I forgot that they were that early, it's wonderful taht they're sleeping so much so just enjoy it I'd say :)
Hugs bel, are you bf'ing? Can your dh help with the nw's at all? I didn't bf at night and basically dh was in charge of 1 baby and I the other for nights while they were getting up regularly. It was around this age that ds started sleeping thru, maybe starting solids will help you guys? I think it made a difference for ds.
Multiples are hard work by themselves let alone with older siblings, you're doing amazingly!
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Hi Kayra,
I think we're struggling with teeth now. Very sore bottoms, grizzly, chewing fingers... I went to bed at 8pm and was up with both at 9.45, then with one at 11.30, the other 0.30am and back with the first at 1am. It's 2am now and I can't sleep.
Yes I breast feed and use it as a quick fix at night, particularly when teething. I've started solids this week. One is totally into it and the other not. But early days... :-)
I think I have to accept it as a phase and ride it out.
What do you think?
Bel
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Yeah I think it is a bit of riding out I'm afraid :( we were the same with ds being more into solids, dd caught up a few weeks later.
When you have the energy you might want to stop nursing as a quick fix but I completely understand that you need things to be quick now and it's not too unusual to feed at night still at this age, hang in there!
Can your dh help out before he goes to bed at least, maybe he could have done the 9:45 one for you? It really does sound exhausting :( did you try medicating for the teeth? Is their day routine pretty good? You could start a thread on the main easy boards if you feel that routine etc could be playing s role in their night wakings. So many hugs!
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Welcome Nicola and bel.
We're struggling big time here :( boys aren't eating or sleeping well. I don't know what's gone wrong...
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Hugs Laura might they be ill? Wonderweek? It's their half age, could that have anything to do with it? Big hugs, although some things get easier it actually never really ends, there's always sthg new.... Xxx
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Morning, after a bad day of not sleeping yesterday Leo was struggling and cried most of the day. I didn't even get a chance to bath them last night as they were both so tired, both in bed by 6:30/7. But during the night they slept well. I think I may post again on the boards to try get them a routine cos I feel like I'm just plodding along hoping for the best.
Hugs Laura, teething maybe? I always put everything down to teething!
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How's things Nicola? Plodding on is what we did till at least 6months and I think kayra did the same.
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Hi Laura, had a few rubbish days of sleep but I think I've cracked it now!! They can only manage 50-60 A time followed by a two hr nap but now that I've found this out hopefully it should help extend things a little.
When were your boys born, were they early?
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No they weren't. Elective c section at 38wks 1day. I was thinking your boys are maybe a bit unsettled too given everything. I'm guessing they must miss their brother too.
Fingers crossed it gets easier for you and amazing you're getting good naps at least that gives you a bit of a break.
My boys driving me and dh crazy. We were giving h milk in the night when he was poorly and the last 3 nights have been awful going cold turkey dropping it. He's been having hour long temper tantrums in the middle of the night!
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Yeah your boys are still pretty small, these first months are really survival, and like Laura said you guys have had so much going on. It's really hard when they're so young that they can on,y tolerate short a times, I remember so looking forward to the day when they'd be able to cope with a couple of hours a time :)
Hugs Laura, I can imagine it being hard, this age is hard anyway and I'm sure they don't like hearing No milk! I hope perseverance will do it for you sooner rather the later, big hugs!
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Hi Everyone!
Laura - 18 month regression would be my guess ;) It's a doozy! I remember DD1 dropping nap left and right and nights were horrid.. she was okay with eating I think though... teeth? Canines are around this age too and they can be horrid.
Bel - so many hugs momma. Multiples are hard, let alone with other kids too. We all have been there and can offer hugs for sure!
Welcome Nicola :) I think we all feel like we are just plodding along without routine for the most part ;) Multiples make the days go by so quickly that just when you have a routine nailed, you realize they have outgrown it already!
We have been doing fairly well here.. a few rough nights but both girls now have a tooth to show for it! I think I blocked out how awful cutting a tooth really is... ugh. So much screaming and lots of meds! Both are bad teethers for sure.. just like big sister was.
We have come to the end of the road with crib sharing I suspect! Charlotte seems to want to be a tummy sleeper all of a sudden and tends to kick Sophia - doesn't end well! We had a good run getting to over 8 months!
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Kara that's pretty good going with the crib sharing!!
Well perseverance has paid off with H but he's only doing about 10hr nights. Feeling a bit fed up about it all tbh today.
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Hugs hun.. sometimes I think the toddlers are harder work than the babies! My dream child can stall at bedtime like a champ!
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Thanks Kara. People just don't really understand how full on it is yk? I like the toddler age as a rule but I prefer my sleep!
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Wow that's good crib sharing Kara! We did a a couple weeks I thimk :P
Hugs Laura, sleep deprivation is a killer, especially when it's been months on end! So is he doing 10hrs without waking? How's J doing?
We're doing fairly well, dd has 2 teeth, ds none, we've had so,e messy naps recently but I'm blaming the ww. My guys are crawling all over the place, it's cute to see how they hang out together most of the time, they're going to be good friends :)
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Still haven't moved the babies to their own cribs! They seem to have figured it out and are happily sleeping together at night again but I do separate them for naps as it is easier to resettle one without the other during the day for sure. .we have one crib in our bedroom and the other in their bedroom down the hall.
So back to the older kids and bedtime... ugh. Anyone want a stall-queen 4.5 yr old?? I think she has had a drop in sleep needs again from 11.5 - 12 down to 10.5-11.5. Ugh.
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Wow, I'd love to see a picture of them in the same bed Kara ;)
Yeah I wouldn't be surprised if A needs a bit less sleep.
We're in nap mess for a change :P ::) but we're doing ok overall, they're being super cute :)
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LOL Kayra! They do take up a good portion of the crib! Still in our room... we tried a wean from reflux meds - bad idea! They are back to being controlled now but naps are junk... teething and a lovely cold from big sister are causing issues :/
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Hugs Kara, illness sucks! All kids have colds here too, the boys seem to have it extra bad, I was really hoping we'd be done with illness by now.
Sorry to hear about getting reflux, when were you able to wean with dd1?
Has anyone potty trained? I'm kind of curious about how it is with twins? I'm trying to loosely do the elimination communication thing, I'm not overly vigilan but would like to try as the weather gets warmer, we do get the odd pee in the toilet and they're happy to sit for a bit. It would be amazing to be done with nap pies earlier rather than later!
Hope everyone's doing well, we don't hear from any of the older twins' mamas anymore :(
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I'm still here...just about!
Kayra I'm impressed with the sitting on the toilet! Haven't even thought how I'll do two boys. Prob will do it in summer holsjust before they're two
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I'm still here...just about!
Kayra I'm impressed with the sitting on the toilet! Haven't even thought how I'll do two boys. Prob will do it in summer holsjust before they're two
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Laura! :-* :-* how are things?
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:'( Probably best not to ask but thank you. :-*
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Oh :( sorry to hear that :'( massıve hugs!!
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Hi ladies, just wanted to check I. And celebrate with you guys that we made it to a year!!!!! :D
Doesn't seem that long ago when Laura said come and join us in ghe multiples thread ;) then again there were days and nights that seemed to go on forever, you know how it is :) anyway just wanted to say thanks for all the support during this year :) Liz (lilyrose), Beth, I don't know if you guys check in at all anymore but we miss you!
Hope everyone's doing well, Laura is it half term for you guys? I hope you manage to catch some rest xxxxxx
Kara while at a friends I put ds and dd to nap in the same crib and thought of you, I must say they looked cute together :)
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Oh my kayra. I can't believe that! Although in under 4mths time h&j will be 2! Every day is still a long one atm but it still only seems like yesterday they were small.
Just finished half term. Not looking forward to going back to work. How's everyone else?
Kayra post some pics!
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Joseph
Harry
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Harry
Joseph
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Oh they are so gorgeous Laura!! Such beautiful boys! Seriously, I'm not just saying it they are gorgeous! Getting good pics are hard of course ::) but I'll try to post a few
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Hi ladies.. It's been a loooong time since I last checked in to baby whisperer.. A combination of factors triggered by Beatrice's oncology scare back in May 2014 (when she was just a year old) meant that I went in on myself somewhat and came away from the forums and for some time I felt like I was a better parent for it... Well, that I worried less about how well I was doing with the girls and that was better for all of us. But the girls are two now and we have all seemingly survived and something made me check in today and then I saw a recent post from kayra and she had wondered how we were doing and I just had to reconnect with you all...
Congratulations on surviving the first year, kayra!
It feels really good to see that familiar faces are still here as it really was such a form of comfort for me to have a space where like-minded parents could fumble around in the darkest places of parenthood (literally, during those torturously tiresome nights, and metaphorically as we try to survive this journey), especially during that first year with twins.
I am also keen to connect with some of the people I haven't met yet, both to learn from and to share with.
I'm going to spend some time catching up on some of the posts now and I'm looking forward to seeing how everyone is doing!
Love,
Beth
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Gorgeous pic kayra
So lovely to hear from you Beth. Do we get a pic?
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Great to hear from you Beth, how is Beatrice now? Yes piccies would be lovely :)
These days I'm trying to get out the habit of calling ds and dd 'the twins' or 'the babies'. I'm feeling that especially with ds1 it detaches him from them or them from him, so I'm trying to say their names or 'your brother and sister' to him. I remember talking about addressing them like that in the first months, does anyone else still refer to them as 'the twins' or sthg? Hard habit to break unfortunately but I'm doing better.
Lena is doing more walking now and her babbling is a lot more like talking, not so much with ds, tho he does say baby and down properly, dd doesn't say any real words yet, but is better at signing. Definitely emoting this stage more :)
Hope everyone is well xxx
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I was quite insistent in the beginning about not calling them the twins so fortunately they're usually called by their names. Sometimes called the little boy but I will call o my big boy so that feels ok yk? My siblings will often call them the twins and I try to remind them they don't call their other niece and nephews the boy or the girl! Isn't always met with a smile ;)
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Hi ladies
Beatrice is absolutely fine now, thank goodness. We recently had their two year well-visit and there was nothing wrong with either of them :). I can't help but wonder though, looking back, whether she was a 'textbook baby' with regards to the easy routine and her sleep because she basically had glandular fever the whole time... I'm trying not to dwell on it too much though!!
I commend you ladies for managing to think about whether you refer to your children in the plural sense or not.. I can honestly say I've never ever thought about it. Sometimes I do call them 'girls' or 'the girls', especially if I want them both here right now... Whoops!
We are in full-on discussion/negotiation phase ATM... Everything and I mean EVERYTHING is a discussion and times two can get very interesting indeed!
The challenges with two vocally communicative children at the same stage developmentally tend to be around differences. For example, b wants a particular song on a cd and p wants a different one or b wants the door closed at bed time and p wants it open. We spend a lot of time practicing 'patience'!!!!
With regard to sleep we are in a great place. I am fully recovered from the first 12/18 months and no longer dream about or long for sleep all day long... Yes you will all get there too... Just hang in there, it's coming very soon!
The girls take one deliciously long afternoon nap and sleep between 10 and 11 hours at night. We feel like we can have a life either side of nap too.. It really does get better and better!
Talk soon!
Beth
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Argh negotiating! Sounds fun :P are they talking quite a bit now then? Wonderful that they are both healthy!! Lovely about sleep! We're doing pretty well on that front, still ot properly on 1 nap though belive it or not, they seem to still be ok with 30min the morning and then 1.5-2hrs in the pm. They'll probably move to 1 over the next couple of months though.
Laura are your sleep troubles a bit better?
Reg, referring to them in the plural I wonder if the fact that we have an older child comes into play as then it the older one bathe twins iyswim? I don't mind the girls/boys so much-which we obviously can't do though :P
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Ladies, I keep thinking of things that, if I had my time again, I wouldn't do or worry about... Wanted to share them with you in case they're useful to you at all!
I would not get rid of sleep sacks! Suck it up and buy the really big ones from amazon, even though they seem expensive! We moved to big girls bedding several months ago and it made it really difficult to manage individual needs as one kid likes the duvet on and the other kicks it off so I never know how to set the temperature of the room right, or how to dress them for bed. Sounds tiny but it's a nightmare! Also, once they start talking it just adds to the chaos and requests at bed time or in the middle of the night....
Keep the number of comfort items low. So we have duvets, bubbas (pacifiers) and water. And those are the only three things happening at bed time. Add to that the fact that one baby screams for the door closed and the other one screams for it to be open (my touchy angel baby who has a hard time settling unless she feels like she's close to me) and it can feel like utter carnage at bed time!
Buy WOW cups instead of sippy cups. Can get on amazon! You tube them.. They are amazing! I did so much sippy cup searching for ones that don't leak but still seem like you have to 'drink' from them, not suck and then I stumbled on these and they were all we needed. Helped us to wean from bottle too as they can be drunk from whilst lying down. Also great for water in the night as they don't leak at all and like I said, can be drunk whilst lying down!
Those are the items at the forefront of my mind but I will add more as I remember more mistakes that I made!
Hope all of you are well and happy!
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So sweet of you Beth! Yes I love sleep sacks, ds1 used them till he was 3so I still have my mammoth sized ones :)
Will look into those wow cups, sounds interesting.
Yes, it will be interesting times when they want different things at bedtime, right now they don't get much choice :P
These days we're getting a fair bit of trying to push eachother of my lap when reading a book, it's kind of funny and also not, dd especially will try and wedge herself between ds and me! Do you guys have that at all?
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Beth I'm definitely going to look up those cups. My boys are still having bottles (ssh)
Kayra I get that all the time. Also if one falls and gets a cuddle the other one will pretend to fall and hurt themselves!
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So I've got a question. My mum just commented on how my boys lived in babygros (sleepsuits) till about 6mths ::) I mean what was the point in getting them dressed for them to be sick on and if we went out it was cold and they had coats on. What did you girls do?
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I don't think it's a big deal, I did get mine dressed just to make life more interesting :P also it was summer here so I was dressing them differently in the day than in the night, I guess for me it helped get Ina rhythm of now it's day now it's bed time rather just round the clock babyness if you see what mean. Try not to let it bother you, its not like there's a right or a wrong.
Well I'm finding twin toddlers quite challenging, I can't seem to produce calm offspring, they are all over the place, climbing etc. plenty of squabbling and grabbing, hitting sometimes too. On top of it all it turns out dd has a sever case of lazy eye so has to wear and eyepatch and glasses which she's constantly pulling off so even when they are playing nicely I can't leave them to it as I have to be vigilant about what she's doing. It's extremely frustrating. Anyone found a solution to squabbles and hitting etc? :P
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Well believe it or not my two are just learning how to take turns!! V short turns but even so. We've modelled and practised for ages and now j will say Harry's go, my go, etc. They still have their fair share of squabbles but not too bad. I reckon two boys or two girls must have a different dynamic though. My two are CRAZY though so feel for you on that one. They get each other into mischief too!
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Well that's encouraging, thanks! We model taking turns and signing please to eachother but can't be on top of them all the time of course ::) would be so fun -or not :P - to get them all together! :)
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Hi,
I have two 4 week old dcda twin girls... I am starting the EASY routine from today. Any words of advice... in terms of cluster feeding, is this two feeds or one feed that is split into two?
Any advice welcome.
Thanks
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HI congratulations! Not sure what dcda means sorry..
I think cluster feed is basically 2 feeds close in succession rather than in 3hr intervals. You'd need to follow their lead though. I don't remember systematically cluster feeding, it just sometimes happened with the way they would feed or short nap iswim? The main easy boards might be more useful in helping with advice about the routine as the principle is basically the same for singletons or twins. Are you trying to sync them? If it works that's great but I found it 'easier' to let the, do their own thing till about 6 months when they were both on 2 naps when I synced them.
Xx
How is everyone else doing? We're busy! It's fun to seem them interact more and more :) both are wearing glasses now (supposed to be at least dd's in denial ::) ) so the new trend is to swap glasses which unfortunely isn't any use as their prescriptions are completely different. Trying to get dd to keep her glass and patch on is my biggest battle-even more so than getting ds1s homework done believe it or not ::) :P
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Dcda means two sacs two placentas meaning fraternal. Like mine. Although I'm not sure mine are fraternal but that's a whole other story!
Ditto to what kayra said. Just go with what you can. I would say it's virtually impossible to get twins on the same routine that early on. So just play it by ear.
Mine are quite funny Now. They tell me if they want to go first but also will volunteer the other one for things like bed or nappy change!
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Haha that's so sweet Laura :)
What makes you think they're identical, or how come you were told they were fraternal..?
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Kayra 'they' say if they have separate sacs and placentas that means they're non id. However I've since read 30% of non id twins are wrongly classified. No one hardly can tell mine apart. Vicki on here with twin girls had two sacs and placentas and hers are identical.
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Yes I'd heard that those were never clear indications and that the only way of knowing for sure was a blood test- If one can be bothered of course :P
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Very quiet here!! How is everyone doing?
I have a couple of questions if there's anyone around,
One is about speech, did you find that your twins were more delayed in speech? Ds1 was an early talker-and basically never stopped :P but by this age (nearly 2)'he was speaking in sentences and had a lot of words. Whereas these guys chatter a bunch of gobbledygook and do have some words but a lot less, nowhere near to sentences and and just more behind than I'd expected. I was wondering if it was maybe the twin factor of having 2 speaking gobbledygook....? And just more chattering with eachother...?
Another thing is that dd will not say ds's name, she does this clicking sound with her tongue instead and we just can't get her to say his name. And he calls himself by hr name, so when asked he gives the same answer for her name and his. But when you speak to him and say his name he responds, he doesn't respond to her name. Not worried as such but I can't say I like it either, do we just wait for them to grow out of it? We of course constantly reinforce the correct names etc without dwelling on it too much.
Another question is about potty training, I haven't read up much on the twin side of things but is he general advice to do them together or to do them seperately? (Assuming they're pretty much at the same level of readiness)
Any thoughts would be appreciated :)
Other than that they're extremely active, the general motto is Try to reach the unreachable, esp if it's electronic! ;) it's fun to see them interact more and more with eachother and with ds1.
Hope everyone else is doing well!
Xxxx
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Hi Kayra! I haven't been on here in ages! How is everyone?
2 years is very early to speak in full sentence so your son was very advanced. Big twin was also speaking in sentences at around 2 but little twin is speaking in broken sentences now, at closer to three. Development is so different for each child that you can't really compare one child with another. With little twin, her language skills improved almost overnight! One day she couldn't speak properly and the next morning she was asking me a question. Babies are weird! But please don't worry, it sounds really normal in my opinion.
What I will also say is that little twin is super confident with her physical abilities - climbing, running, general mayhem. So her development is pretty advanced.
Give them time and you won't be able to shut them up!
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Thanks nippo :) yeah I'm hoping that eventually the 3 of them will talk eachother to tears rather than us :P it's just funny when they bother just go on in absolute gibberish and look at us as if we should be understanding them ;)
Are the girls playing more and more together?
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Hi Laura, yes they are, but also fighting more and especially over who gets mummy which is hard. It is constant and I'm trying to stop them competing with each other. Not really sure how to do that. Just want to love themselves and each other without envy or comparison. I think that's truly hard for same sex twins - particularly girls. But yes they play, and have conversations which are very cute
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I literally haven't been on here in an age! Kayra I was told that twins are usually later to talk due to talking to each other and Oliver was really advanced like your big boy so its strange. My boys had their own names for each other for ages but they now use their proper names so just keep doing what you're doing!!
Potty training... I'm going to do mine together but then I have two boys. I guess perhaps try together and see what happens??
I'm so so tired! Still have big twin waking and both like to be awake at the crack of dawn...
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Oh bless you must be exhausted! Do they entertain themselves a bit when they wake in the morning at least? O is an early waked too isn't he? Can they just 'quietly' play together or sthg?
The twins have started to call ds2 by his second name Kaya-they say it more like kaga- but at least it's better than the tongue clicking and hopefully eventually they'll get to Mika too :P
I'm attempting pt'ing here and there, dd is aware after she's been so that's sthg, ds2 is motivated by getting a sticker so will do sthg when sat but isn't really aware when he has an accident...we'll get there eventually :P
Your 2 must be talking a fair bit now? :) interestingly ds2 is ahead of dd speech-wise tho she is constantly communicating in her own way. Very busy and very cute :)
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Hello???
I have been MIA for far too long!
The girls are 2.5 now and going through that incredible language explosion! New words every day :)
I have identical girls that were thought to be di-di (DCDA) from my first scan at 7w3d... we found out that wasn't the case when i delivered a single giant placenta! My OB sent the placenta to pathology to confirm... one placenta, not two that had fused so we know for sure that they are identical. I did a fair bit of research on fraternal/identical and the only way to know for sure that twins are identical is shared placenta (or placenta and sac) or a blood test if they have separate sac/placentas. as mentioned, about 30% of identicals share nothing in utero. all depends on when the egg splits with identicals as to what, if anything, they will share.
How is everyone?
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Hi Kara, me too Mia.
My boys are a little over 3.5 and full of life. They NEVER stop. It's draining some days.
Kayra how are you? Xxx
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Hi twin mummies!
Just want to say hello and hopefully the thread will pick up again as would love some online BW twin support!
I am Samantha, live in UK, have 11 week old non identical boys.
(First babies)
Am also a midwife although a fat lot of good that did me when it became my turn!
Loving being a twin mummy although finding the effect its having on my marriage the hardest (babies arrived before 1st anniversary!) Just feel so frustrated at my husbands inability to help! I could go on......
Would love to hear from you twin parents
Xxx
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Hi and welcome Sam, not a twin mummy myself but hopefully this will bump the post up enough to catch someone's eye :D
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Hi jessmum! Sorry we missed this post. There aren't loads of twin mummies on this forum and a lot of us have got past the no sleep stage after a very long endurance test, lasting 4 years!!
Having twins is really hard on your marriage, probably even harder if you haven't been married that long. You do end up having to work as a team. We went on a great course run by TAMBA which offered advice to Dad's. A twin daddy came in and spoke about his experience and somehow it got through and stayed with my husband. He used to do the bedtime routine every night to give me a break as by bedtime I was so tired I couldn't think straight. Might be worth finding a Dad mentor for your husband to find his own support...