BabyWhispererForums.com
ACTIVITY => Activity Time & Toddler Activity => Topic started by: Laempi on February 13, 2015, 18:28:08 pm
-
I was wondering how much time other mums spend playing with their LO. I try to play with my son (5 months) but at the moment he is a bit clingy and wants to be carried around ALL the time :-\
I'm also asking as I do feel guilty if I only sit next to him, doing something other as paying with him or watching him play - not that that's often possible. Does anybody feel the same? I started calling his naptime "my freetime". Harsh? Shouldn't I be over the moon and ALWAYS full of love?
-
Nope, I'm sure I wasn't! The first year is seriously hard work for many mums.
I played with DS a bit, but I also had him alongside me and just chatted away while I did the housework, the shopping etc. One of my favourite memories of maternity leave is having him sit in the seat of the trolley, handing him things to feel and explore as we went around the shop.
Looking after yourself is one of the things that many of us here have learned is critical. Happy and rested parents are more able to meet their children's needs and create a balance that works.DS is nearly seven but today we've done a mixture of activities that we both enjoy - some for me, some for him, some for both of us. And we've both enjoyed our day together.
-
I did quite a bit, but tbh even Tracy said to hang back and observe. The problem is sometimes we jump in too soon when they're trying to figure something out. I think it's important they have some time to explore and do things for themselves. Helps create a more independent LO in the future.
And nap time is YOU time, one of the fundamentals of EASY, so don't feel like you're being harsh at all. As mj&n said, it's time for you to rest and do something for yourself that's not completely baby-centred.
Motherhood is the single most hardest and challenging 'jobs' I have ever had, so no you're not supposed to be over the moon all the time. There will be days when they really get on your nerves, but that's part and parcel of it all. Wine and chocolate are staples in this house to see me through the bad and even good days ;).
-
Listen, nobody can play with their baby all the time, nor should they! I think that leaving them be is an important part of their development. DD would tear apart her book basket, she'd just sit with toys and babble to herself. I was never far. Sure, I'd sit and talk, play, read, giggle, stack, chase.......but if I needed to shower or unload the dishwasher or make a call, she was happy on her own. Be sure she has lots of things to do that are at her level, and check in with her so she doesn't feel "left". My dd could see me, the way our house was set up, so that helped.
At 5 months, he is still very little, but my dd liked her excersaucer at that time. I'd say she was fine for 20 minutes or so, but that was enough for me to get things done here and there!
-
I was with mine 24/7, it was rare to ever get any time off at all, I couldn't possibly have played with him the entire time he was awake. I did play with him a lot but I do also remember there being times I felt guilty about not doing more with him. During the SA phases I just took him absolutely everywhere with me so I wasn't out of sight for a moment, it was easier that way and more comforting for him, but I do remember willing the clock to reach nap time!
-
When mine were small they were always with me when awake but tbh I did not do loads of playing with them. They puttered while I did other things - cooking/cleaning etc so that when naptime came I did not feel like I had to run around and do work! DD3 loves to "help" so she gets in on anything I am doing rather than really play much.