BabyWhispererForums.com
EAT => Breast Feeding => Topic started by: Vally on August 20, 2016, 02:18:34 am
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hi ladies. I am really after some positive vibes at 2am as I know it's early days as my DS is not even 2 days. 2nd night tonight and he has been asleep all day and wide awake until at least 3am. He is tired although acts hungry too!!! I can't put him down and now rocking him in my arms. I know that it will get better when he learns day from night but please is there anything I can do as I can't sleep in the day as have two other LO's. You would think I would be ok being no 3!
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Just to add to the nights events!! So good news was he slept in Moses basket for 6 hours but not until 330am!!! Any ideas on how to get him to feed in the day rather than cluster feed from 11pm to 3am???
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Hugs xx
At 2 days old I don't think there a lot you can do. You could wake through the day at 3 hours but baby may just be too sleepy to feed well but I'd encourage that.
Is your OH off on leave?
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Congratulations!
You're not alone with 3 kids already are you? Is your OH or any any family not around to help with the other kids while you concentrate on the newborn and sleep?
I'd make sure LO takes all naps in the same room with it light and some noise. Then do the opposite at night with dark room and quiet even when you get him up to feed and for nappy changes.
Night 2 is normally the worst as they wake up and their reserves from the womb start running low. It will get better. Hang in there.
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Thanks guys. OH luckily around which is great to help with other two. In rubbish at lying down as feel always stuff to do. He's fed a bit more today but has been pretty much asleep all day. Will just have to be patient and not expect too much too soon.
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Honestly do nothing but rest and feed. Let your OH do the rest. You're the one up all night and feeding. My OH did everything for the first week and was still getting more sleep!!! He had two weeks off so did a lot the next week.
Glad he's fed a bit better today x
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Thanks Shiv52. Think tomorrow will have to definitely get some daytime sleep. It's 315am and have not yet had any sleep. He fed at 630pm and then have really struggled to feed him since!! He's been asleep in my arms for a while as every time I put him down he cries. He won't feed from me as having latch problems and when I do think he's asleep he screams out suddenly with possibly Timmy pain and wakes himself!! I'm so tired!!
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I'd a really hard first week with latch issues too. My little lady was 2 weeks early so think that made things difficult and it was so frustrating as Id BF the previous two for more than a year each. She did end up having a tongue tie which needed snipped.
She slept really well on my DH so hand him over once he's fed and see will be take a good sleep on him and head to bed. And DH can bring him up to you if he needs fed.
Enjoy all the newborn snuggles though. I miss them already.
Hugs xxx
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Thanks. Definitely have the blues today. Can't stop crying as he slept on me all night. Milk has come in I'm so engorged he won't latch so off to buy a pump and nipple shield. My DD fed so well and like yours up to nearly a year but I feel ready to give up trying today. So sorry just feeling so rubbish!
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Awh hugs xxx
I cried and balled for hours day 3. Nipple shields saved my feeding. I found I left her too long between feeds it made it worse. As you know just watch the pumping doesn't make things worse with the engorgement. That also shows he has obviously been getting enough at feeding if your milk has come in so well.
Hang in there xxxxx
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Thank you so much for taking the time to reply it really does help me feel like I'm not being useless right now. Will definitely try the nipple shield first before pumping. Thanks again xx
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I was a wreck that first week and got lots of support here. Without it and my amazing MWs Id have been lost. I'm happy to hold your hand while you get sorted which you will. Lack of sleep doesn't help so sleep as and when you can.
One feed at a time lovely. You'll get there. hormones will not be helping at all x
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So far feeding has been a bit better but still struggling on one side. I have tried swaddling too and he has just had two hours in his Moses basket which is great as I slept for most of it too. He has woke again after 2 hours so I have fed him but not entirely sure each time he wakes whether it is hunger or just wind. I do try and wind him but not much success but think that's what wakes him sometimes. Would you just continue to feed each time he wakes at this age in case it's hunger? I don't want to make any wind worse by overfeedunf but I guess you can't over feed a breastfed baby at this age?
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I'd likely just feed for sure. Those first few days for us were awful. I'm just havjng a flashback to sleeping sitting up with DD3 on me. What worked was letting her sleep on an incline. She was just so windy and burping didn't do a lot. It's not recommended but she slept on a small pillow if I was awake and watching her and at night I inclined mattress with a towel. That really really helped. She got no sleep lying flat.
Hugs xxx
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Oh god this is just awful. At least in the day before he was quite happy after feeds, now he's just fussing until he is fed to sleep and this is going on now still at 9am. He had been feeding constantly and think that must have fast let down too as he's now pulling on and off the breast. I've given into a paci as o literally feel sick from constantly feeding. I feel like I'm cracking up!!!
One last question for you. Do you think I am ok to just feed him whenever I think he's hungry as I think by stop watching the clock at this age may make me chill a bit and let him sleep in the day as long as he wants. Should I be trying to wake him at this age in the day? Or should I literally feed and if he falls asleep let him sleep?
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Hugs xx
There is a GS at day 3-5 so it's likely that in combination with your milk coming in. He's teeny tiny so try not to worry too much. A paci is a good idea. Feed him and hand him to your DH and get a break. It's hard enough to be feeding without needing to do all the settling in between. He will get used to the fast flow. I wouldn't be advising pumping if you've fast flow as may well cause supply issues.
Honestly I used to just snuggle up on the couch with Dd3 and sleep when she did. Get some rest xxx
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Thanks. You have made me feel better mans hopefully just a growth spurt. Should I stick to trying to feed no more than every two hours in the night and day and use the paci In between if won't settle as I think feeding every half hour too much?
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2 hours is probably pushing it. I'd say though if you've feed for a good 10/15 minutes it's ok to hold off for a good hour. If he settles with the paci then super as it could be he's a super sucky baby. Mine were all like that. My first was never off my boob. With the other two I knew they could last a while between feeds. Also keep an eye on feeding. He should be active feeding so suck suck swallow and not just nibbling. But then again comfort feeding is super for supply but it's important to get a break too.
How are your poor nipples holding up? I needed a lot of lansinoh in the first while as I got quite grazed and sore. How's his latch?
You're doing GREAT!! BFing is so hard xxx
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He's done well today with 2 hourly feeds and is feeding well. I've just fed him now snd off to bed for hopefully few hours sleep!! My OH has 3oz of Expressed milk to try when he needs it to hopefully give me a bit longer, that's the plan so fingers crossed!!! Do you think that to feed every hour at night is fairly normal at this stage? I will try Paci if wakes after half an hour and if that doesn't work I guess I should just feed?? My nipples sre surprisingly fine considering the marathon feeding!!!!thanks again, you definitely are keeping my spirits up and for that I'm truely grateful xx
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Hurray!!!! Sounds like a super day today. Well done both of you!!!
Hope you get a few hours rest. Amazing the difference a bit of sleep makes! How were you feeling today? Have the hormones settled?
That sounds like a good plan for tonight. He'll soon let you know if he wants fed and not the paci.
Fingers crossed for a good night for you both. Keep at it. You're doing great. Those early days are coming back to me and they really are so overwhelming xxxx
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So far it's started better so that's an improvement. He stayed with DS until 1130pm which was great as gave me two hours much needed rest. He fed well at 1130pm and I settled him into the Moses using the paci. He then woke at 150pm for his next feed which is what I am going now. So it's absolutely fab that his feeds have stretched and I got him into basket albeit with use of paci and some rocking. I'm hoping that the rocking and use of paci can be temporary whilst he adapts to the Moses basket. Not sure what the rest of the night will bring but will let you know. Thx again and yes although very tired today didn't feel as emotional so think hormones settled a bit xx
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That's great!! In those early weeks you just do what you need to do and don't worry about the rest. He sounds like he's feeding much better. Hurray.
Make sure you're enjoying some newborn snuggles among the madness as it goes so quickly xx
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Was just heading to bed after a Marathon feeding and Settling to bed session and I thought of you. How are you getting on today??
Hugs xxxx
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Thanks for thinking of me, hope you are not too pooped after your marathon feeding sesh, how olds your LO?
Well the first part of the night started ok as I managed a few hours sleep while OH did some expressed milk but after that it was petty much every hour and had him in bed with me. Was very tired by this afternoon and felt really snappy with the other kids which makes me feel bad.
This evening has been a bit better so far. I seemed to feed every hit from 530om then I went to bed at 9 when OH did a bottle and I managed a few hours. I fed him at 1230pm and managed to get him into Moses basket. He woke just now at 150pm so feeding him. I think he woke with wind as was very squirmy then burped as I picked him up. I saw the midwife today and she said that feeding hourly was probably not necessary as he could be just snacking and bit therefore getting the hind milk. Do you think I should have not fed him just now after an hour and 20 when he woke? I did try the paci but he seemed hungry? How are your nights? X
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So I finished the feed at 150pm and put him back into basket. He seemed fine at first but then got really upset. I'm pretty sure it's wind as he's pulling his knees up and just looks in pain. He has always fatted a bit and generally looks uncomfortable. I've picked him up to wind him and now currently rocking him to sleep in my arms. I can't imagine he will now settle in basket. He seems to get a build up of wind and then I think that is half the problem at night. Do you have and ideas on what I could do? Should I try infacol maybe?
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I think it's still very very early days. He's not a week old yet so don't worry. We seemed to have that wind build up at 2/3/4am and it just took a bit of time to work through. If I couldn't get her settled after feeding I gave her to my DH and he took her downstairs to wind and get back to sleep but that only needed to happen a handful of times.
At this age I don't really think they can be snacking. Is he sleepy when you're feeding? It could be you need to take him off and strip him and wake him up to burp and then keep feeding to get longer than 10 mins?? My DD3 had short feeds as was so sleepy so I did need to help her take a bit more at feed times.
After 1hr20 and no resettling Id have just fed and hoped that would get him back to sleep.
How did the rest of the night go? Hang in there. You've come so far already x
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He didn't really settle again so I pretty much fed every hour again. I'm just so exhausted and really tearful again today. I feel bad for my other two kids as I'm not the usual upbeat mum they have. I can't believe it's my third and I am feeling so overwhelmed, I really hope this feeling passes soon. I'm going to get OH to give bottle again about 9pm so I can get a few hours sleep before the dreaded night!! I'm going to try swaddling tonight with a cellular blanket. Hope you have a good night xx
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Flipping hormones! On day 6 my DH had the kids at the park and Id to ring and tell him to keep them out as I was so distressed and upset and I didn't want them to see me in that state. Be reassured our first few weeks were awful as I ended up sick with thrush then mastitis then a breaSt abscess and my poor older kids hardly got a look in other than snuggles on the settee and they don't remember that bit at all.
Wonder would be better getting DH to do a later bottle feed. I tended to feed to 10 and there was a lot of feeding in the evening. My DH would get her to sleep and just hold and resettle as long as he could then feed a bottle change and resettle in bed. So I got from 10-2/3 which meant the rest of the night didn't seem so long.
HOws today been?
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Well Shiv52 I'm so happy if you were here I'd hug you!! So he cluster fed most of the day, fed at 630pm slept in basket until 930pm. I then fed him at 930pm and went to bed. I didn't really sleep as he was pretty unsettled for 2 hours but OH did bottle at 1130pm and put him in basket. He bought him up tou bedroom asleep in the basket, he woke at 2am for a feed. I then swaddled him and he's still asleep now at 7am!!!! Can you believe it??!! I should be asleep and I really didn't sleep the whole not expecting him to wake. Fingers crossed this continues xxxx
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Yay!! Sounds like it's all going in the right direction 😃😃😃😃
The cluster feeding in the day helps to get better night stretches I found. I'm delighted for you and hopefully you'll sleep more tonight if he does similar. Even not being up every two minutes will help you feel more rested too.
Siobhan xx
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Dropping off some hugs xxx
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Oh thanks, hugs greatfully recieved. We are definitily getting there and heading in the right direction. Nights are better as getting two chunks of sleep at the beginning of the night where he will sleep in the Moses so that is great. He can be pretty restless from 4/5am onwards and I find it hard to get him back into basket. He still is not great at latching on and this is a bit tricky as it can cause lots of fuss during night feeds. We went for a day out today which was really lovely for the other two and LO was very good although the BF in public quite tricky when he's not great at latching. I have to say I'm not find BF s pleasurable experience as I did with DD as she was so good at latching it was really quite s nice experience. I am very sore now and I'm not sure how long I will be able to BF but will feel terrible if I stop too soon!! Hope all is well with you and family x
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Quick question as I'm up feeding. LO has a feed at 4am, really good feed from both sides. By the time I made sure she was really asleep it was 5am so put him in basket and all was fine. He then wakes at 545am seems really windy as squirming a lot and lots of farting!! I did try and settle by laying him on my chest to wind and even tried paci to settle. Eventually offered BF which he is taking but not sure it was s true hunger thing or he's just doing it to try and go back to sleep although he is definitely feeding. Do you think waking after 45mins could have really been hunger? I suppose it was nearly two hours from the start of the last feed. He is always unsettled at this time!??
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Wow a day trip!! You are awesome. Don't under estimate how awesome that is when you're BFing. We had the same latch issues and I didn't attempt feeding in public for ages!! Honestly I remember thinking oh this is not easy or enjoyable and then just one day it felt amazing again and how I remembered it with the other two. Is he smaller than your DD? My DD3 was a full pound lighter than the others and had a wee tiny mouth and just found latching difficult until she was a little bigger. I did use nipple shields for a while to help as my nipples were very cut and I had thrush and mastitis which was awful.
Super you're getting two good stretches at night now. I'd say in those early hours he may well just be hungry after going longer between feeds and I do think gas is at play. I know even at 4 months we get that 5/5.30 unsettled was due to wind. It's really annoying!
Hugs and love. You are doing so well xxx
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Yes I felt a such of accomplishment getting out for the day. Maybe I should preserve longer with the BF. My main concern is doing it in public as I have activities nearly every day after school for the kids and often have to sit in a small waiting room whilst entertaining the other child so adding a BF to this feels me with dread. Do you think I could successfully do one or two bottles of formula a day then BF for the rest and at night? Maybe you are right about the 5am thing and maybe he just wants a bit of cluster feeding as he slept two long stretches so I will continue to offer BF at these times. He was virtually same weight as dd but as he had the tongue tie he really didn't feed much at all for 48 hours and just slept, he therefore lost more weight 9.8%. He's now putting it back on but not yet back to birth weight. Sounds like you did really well to persevere through mastitis.
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You will be so fed up with my constant questions and can't believe I'm being so anxious about it all!! Just one quick question, when should I start thinking about EASY? I'm assuming to early at 9 days as I am really not watching the clock or his A time or anything, often he feeds to sleep and other times ms tats awake. I'm hoping this is ok at this stage and don't need to be waking or anything?
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It took three weeks to get back to birth weight here and my lovely MWs werent concerned so don't worry too much about that.
Honestly I did a mix of bottles of expressed milk initially and I just got fed up with the faff of bottles that I just fed myself as soon as I able. I get what you're saying about activities etc and I guess only you know what will work for you guys. We've been on summer holidays and start back next wednesday to school and activities. UGH.
What I did in May/June was feed a bit early sometimes if we were going to an activity. I tended to read to my DD2 while we were waiting or do her homework. My DD3 has been a fairly efficient feeder so finishes
Eating pretty quickly. I say see how you go hun. Don't rule anything out but see how you go. I always found things settled at 3/4 weeks and thjngs just got easier all round.
With EASY I think it's still early days. I fed to sleep a lot in those early weeks and tried to get one nap where she'd go to sleep without it. I'll be honest and say I've found it really impossible to get a predictable EASY going with the bigger ones being off school as they wake her being noisy or we have been out so we do deal with a lot of OT in the evenings here. I've found it hard balancing everyone's needs YK?
You can never ask too many questions. Support is so important in these early weeks. I've two lovely BW friends and weve a what's app group and they seriously kept me sane listening to me saying I couldn't see a way through and them encouraging. So I'm happy to support you xxxx
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Thank you so much. I will not worry too much about routine at the moment and will focus on taking each day at a time. I won't rule anything out as maybe the BF will get easier and I find I can fit in around kids activities. I just feel do daft as I just don't feel myself, feel almost panicky all the time I find it hard to even eat sometimes. I just want to feel my normal self and start enjoying my gorgeous family.
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I would absolutely feed on demand in this early age, this will help to establish a good supply too. have you seen a Lactation consultant at all? these latch issues and pulling off the breast could be due to tongue tie, worse checking it out I think. hope things will get better soon! its so hard...xx
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Sounds like you're feeling a bit overwhelmed lovely and mAybe a bit anxious? I was definitely not myself the first few weeks after having DD3 and it took a while to find a new normal. I was so worried about DH going back to work and me having to do school runs and I normally take everything like that in my stride. I do think the lack of sleep made me feel bad as well as the hormones settling and there is a big pressure on yourself when you're BFing. I do think it's normal xxx
Just try and get chunks of sleep when you can. Mine are back to school next week and I have great plans to nap with the baby when they are!
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Yes you are right that I am feeling slightly overwhelmed and anxious and hopefully this will pass soon. My two go back to school next Thursday so I need to make the most of nap times too. X
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Hugs and love xxx
Mine were off on Easter holidays when DD3 was born and the first week was a bit mental. Oncr back at school it was easier to rest and concentrate on the baby. Give yourself permission to do bare minimum which for us mummies is still a lot!
How'd your lovely baby boy do last night? Xx
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I feel like a bit of a black cloud has lifted today. Feel in much better spirits and not that anxious feeling. He had a great night. He was really unsettled from about 9pm to 1130pm but my OH was dealing with him as he had expressed bottle on hand. He had the bottle at 1130pm but not much of it but slept until 530am, couldn't believe it. He then fed every hour as he must have been very hungry. Today he seems to be feeding constantly, every 1-2 hours which is fine if it stocks him up for bed. I think that I have started to relax and not worry about timings and have just gone with his hunger cues even if it's every hour. I did wander if it was a comfort feed but I can see him gulping each time and he seems to have a good feed each time. I'm hoping that I can start slump thinking about a bedtime routine when kids go back to school as I'm going to have to get a feed in before school each morning. I'm sure I will need some guidance to help get into a bedtime routine. At the moment after he's has a feed around 630pm he stays downstairs in basket until OH brings him up after a late feed. So I guess eventually we would out him upstairs at 630pm and then treat anything else as a night feed?
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I'm delighted for you xxxx
I've been keeping DD3 down until DF for a good while and only just started putting her up a while back at normal bedtime.
What time do you need to be up at to get ready for school?
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Usually I have to get the kids out of bed by 730am at the latest. We will need to leave the house at 815am so really need kids up by 7am so need to work around that really and obviously need to get a feed in whilst kids get dressed or eat breakfast?
Tonight so far. LO went to sleep after a feed at 630pm, slept until 11pm, had bottle from OH and he woke at 2am so I'm feeding him now. Fingers crossed for the rest of this night!!!
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Rest of the night a disaster! I guess he doesn't yet know that most of his sleep needs to be done at night? I thought he sided the night and day thing but maybe he's only settled into having one king chunk at night? So he did 630- 11pm which is good but wish it had been later like the other night. Should I have woken him at sat 730pm to encourage the longer sleep later? I've always not wanted to wake s sleeping baby and think they find a way of settling into s routine but wander if I should be making his bedtime much later at the moment? So he woke at 11pm had bottle went to sleep until 2am. I then fed him
at 2am and then all went horribly wrong. He fed for almost an hour which I thought some was comfort but could still hear some gulps. I tried to put down but seemed awake and not happy to be put down. So offered other side in desperate attempt to get him to sleep. Again he seemed awake. After I thought he'd finished i tried to out down. Eventually settled him in arms with paci which fell out after a few mins and eventually got him back into basket. By now it was 445am so nearly 3 hours feeding and setting. I then went to sleep and bingo 545am he's awake again so I've just fed him a shirt feed. What do you think is causing him to not really settle after he's had a big sleep? What else could I try? It's hard not sleeping after 2am!!!!
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So it's 845 now and I've been awake since 2am feeding and settling. Im feeding him again just to get him to sleep as not content with paci. I'm getting into so bad habits with feeding to sleep but really don't know what else to do. I really thought I was getting there!!!!
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Feeding to sleep at night is not an issue at all. At a week old it's not a huge deal for during the day either. I always did as A time is so short.
With bedtimes I tended to cluster feed 7-9.30/10 and then went to bed and DH did the next feed and resettling so I could get a good chunk of sleep.
He's doing a great big stretch but I'd prefer it later too. But I found when I woke DD3 was just too sleepy to feed.
Hang in there. It's always one step forward two back in these first weeks. In a couple of weeks you'll be able to feed lying down and that makes a huge difference!
Hugs xxx
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Hi. Just thought I'd give you quick update and to see if there's anything else I could be doing. He seems to be more awake in the day which is great and not sleeping much over 2 hours at a time during the day so I did think maybe he is sorting his day and night. The last two nights he's gone to sleep at 7ish and then has either woken or OH does a DF at 1130pm. After that he still only manages every 1 sometimes 2 hours throughout the night. I suspect it's because he doesn't have big feeds each time. I don't want to walk him by changing nappy in night (unless dirty of course) as I really don't want him screaming and waking the other children. I also have to wait until he's absolutely zonked in my arms before laying him in Moses. Is there anymore I can do at this stage to get him to go longer at night or do you think it's just where's he's still young? He's nearly back up to birth weight of 8lb. When the kids are back to school I will try and work on him being able to self settle to sleep for his naps to try and get away from holding or feeding to sleep.
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I was just thinking of you as I fed in the school car park 😜
In terms of nights I think hes doing his big stretch from 7-11.30 which is awesome but onviozik u be better from 1-5/6!!! Would you be better cluster feeding in the early evening and getting DH to do the bottle a bit later? And then hopefully he'll be filled up to do that longer stretch at the middle of the night? it is normsl though but it would be better to get him sleeping In middle of the night. It's hard with other kids though.
Do you think the bottle is making him more windy?
Hugs xxx yay on the weight gain 😘😘
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Yes I'd love that long stretch to be later, it just seems quite hard to wake him around that time. Do you think I should wake him after say a 2 hour nap after 6pm? Also I have tested out his cot today for a nap which he loves, he's been in there nearly 2 hours. What's the longest nap I should let him have in the day?
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Today he's been feeding every 2 hours. His last feed was 430pm so should I cluster feed every hour and when should I stop to let him sleep? X
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I'd probably aim for bed bed at 8.30/9 and hopefully that feeding will help him go for longer after his dream feed??
Sorry I'm a bit late so You've likely decided already what to do. Sometimes they are just so sleepy it's hard to make them Feed when we want them to 😜.
During the day I tended to not let mine go more than 3.5 hours between feeds although she was incredibly sleepy so even when I woke her it was near impossible to get a decent feed into her.
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He fed at 630 and then prob fell asleep about 7. I've just woken him for a feed and he's had a really good feed so just about to put him back down and then get OH to do a dream feed at 1030/11pm so fingers crossed it might help?? Will let you know. He's been feeding every 2 hourly like clock work today. When should I expect him to do 3 hourly and is that the point you would consider starting a EASY routine?
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I'd maybe let OH do a feed when he next wakes?? Get you to bed!!!
Every two hours at this stage is fine. My friend bottle feeds and her 4 month old is still waking every 2 hours at night and the wee monkey goes 3/4 hours between feeds in the day. So allow BF babies do need fed more often I was reaSsured some babies just need to feed more often regardless of how they are fed.
You can start EaSY at any time but at this stage Id concentrate more on just following that flow as best you can through the day x
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How was your night??xx
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After having a feed from OH at 1130pm he woke at 230pm and then pretty much 2 hourly through the night do by the time I'd fed really not much sleep. I'm not really sure why I bothered waking him at 830pm last night? Today he's been great having good naps and very content. He's been pretty much feeding 2 hourly around the clock and has been taking big feeds, think he must be having bit of growth spurt all of a sudden. Today he fed 7am, 9am, 1130am, 2pm, 430pm, 630,830pm sleep 9pm. Tonight we are just going to see when he wakes rather than wake him. I never woke my other two and they eventually established their own pattern so going to see? Will let you know how it goes. My OH is still on the sofa and o really want him to come back to bed so hoping nights get better soon. How's your LO doing? X
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so last night after his feed at 9pm he woke at 1230am so OH fed. He the did to 330am which was nice but after that really hard to settle. After feeding at 3am got him back into basket at 4ish but after about half hour he was awake again. I settled him in my arms and he went back down at 5sm. Again didn't really settle so fed again. Eventually put back in St 6ish again didn't really settle. Fed at 7am again. Couple of questions 1) is it quite normal at his age yo be really unsettled the latter part of the night?
2) is there anything else I can try to settle him after 3am?
3) what time should I start his day again? 9am or 7am?
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That was super last night until 3.30! Sounds like you are moving in the right directions starting to get slightly longer between feeds. The good full feeds through the day will likely help that.
With the latter part of the night....sounds like wind or some sort of discomfort? Is his basket inclined slightly? I find Niamh is worse at nights as she's lying flatter for longer periods so less chance for wind to escape. We still struggle now with it although she doesn't wake nearly as much. Definitely no reflux? I think it's normal to an extent and for you guys it definitely seems to be improving gradually. I do know there were a few nights I'd literally fed and done everything and kicked DH and he got up and took her down at 5am and let her get a rest (and me!).
I totally agree with you about letting them settle in to their own routine. Even if I woke N she didn't feed well until she was ready.
With starting the day in the early weeks we started the day usually about 8.30/9 and that lasted through the summer. BT feed and settled to night sleep at about 9pm. Now we are back at school I'm starting the day at 7.30 boooooo!!!! At this age I wouldn't be too strict with when to start and judge it on your night. Is there a time you'll need him to be up for school runs? What suits you best with the bigger kids?
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Thanks you are always really useful. I do think it is sometimes wind as he seems uncomfortable. I have put one end of the basket up already but may also try putting something small under the head of his mattress. I'd like to start the day at 7am to fit in with the school run but maybe at the moment will just see what happens with his bedtime as sometimes he goes down at 7am sometimes it's more 9pm. He's had a feed tonight at 630pm and getting tired now at 730pm so will put him down. He may or may not wake at 830/9pm so will see?
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What a little superstar he was last night. He went to bed at 730pm fed at 11pm, 3pm,6pm and up at 830am. He settled nicely in between feeds in his basket so had some great sleep. Fingers crossed it continues x
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Yay!!!!! Bet you feel amazing after some sleep.
I think you play bedtime by ear as you say and maybe see how it goes once the others are back to school with wake up?
You're doing great!!! Well done for persevering!!
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Just thought I'd give you an update. He's doing pretty well and feeding every three hours during the day, sometimes a little more or less to fit in around school runs, after school activities eye. At night he tends to go down about 730pm wakes at 1130pm, 230pm which is great. He can then stir about 430am and I really don't think he's hungry as he takes one or two sucks and then really not anymore. I think some of it is wind as he's very grungy!! He just generally seems to want to resettle to sleep but finds it hard. I've been giving him a pacifier and cuddling him back to sleep which does help and sometimes after half hour will go back to sleep for up to 2 hours. Do you think that using the pacifier and a cuddle is going to cause me problems later on or do you think as he grows he will start to have deeper sleeps at this time? I could feed again but want to get in the habit of feeding more at night than the day as this was something that happened with DD where she hardly fed in the day as she quite enjoyed the 'night cafe'!!!
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Wow!!! He's doing GREAT!!!!!
If he's resettling at 4.30 for 2 hours then he's likely not hungry especially if he's not taking much of a feed. I don't think resettling as you are will cause an issue given he's still so little and not like you can just leave him to it if he's getting upset. I know what you mean about feeding more at night but at this early age it is often the case they feed round the clock anyways!! The joys eh? So if a feed settles him quicker id likely just feed. Hard to know.
Sorry for a late reply. We're back to school and getting back into routine is kicking my ass ;)
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I know what you mean about the school run! I was half asleep this morning. He was so unsettled after about 230am I just can't figure out whether it's hunger, Tummy ache or just he's not that tired. Do you think that it's because he has some good sleep at the start of the night along with lots of day sleep that he's just not that tired? He can sleep for 3 hours at a time in the day, should I wake him after say 2 hours in the day?
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Yeah it might be worth not letting him sleep more that 2/2.5 hours in the day to see does that help. It's so hard though isn't it? I do remembering hitting that point with N and saying to DH that we couldn't expect her to sleep all the time yk? But waking her during the day was a pain as when she was asleep I could get things done.
Hugs xx
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Just checking in. How are you lovely?? Xxxx
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Hello. Well all feels a bit crazy! I feel like we make 1 step forward and 2 steps back. He was doing a nice one stretch from about 730pm to 1230pm and although not at a time when I want to be sleeping felt as though at least he could do a long stretch and that would eventually help the overall routine. The last few nights he's fed about 7pm and then gone to sleep about 830pm. He then woke again at 10pm took a while to feed and resettle and then again at 1am and 330am. It's now 420am and I'm still up with him as he's been fed but just wide awake so I'm cuddling him with the dummy hoping he will go off to sleep!! I'm rely keen to try and start a bit of a routine. The day generally starts at 630am/7 so really want to aim for 7pm as bedtime. Do you think that we should try putting him down after his 7pm feed? He wander if he had got overtired as 830pm last night meant he's been awake for over 1.5 hours. Think the OH was thinking keeping him up as much as possible in the evening to help at night but this clearly doesn't help. Surely he should have at least one long stretch of sleep? Should I be waking him for feeds every 3 hours in the day as sometimes he goes 3.5 sometimes 4 hours and should naps be no longer than 2 hours? How's your school run doing? I had the pleasure of speaking to a mum telling me how her baby slept all night as a newborn!! Why do people feel the need to tell you these things and surely no newborn can sleep all night!!!
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Well tonight now is just confusing. He's had a good day feeding every 3 hours and has not had really long naps, maybe 1.5 hours this morning from school run 1 hour at lunch, 1.5 hours at 2ish an hour around 5 or 6. He was awake at 7pm after a 45 nap so gave him feed and started to try and settle him before 7pm as I felt he had been getting over tired. Well he just didn't seem tired, eyes wide awake sometimes quite content other times upset as clearly tired. I tried pacifier and rocking and eventually he went to sleep at 9pm. He then woke at 1030pm so OH fed him and he just wouldn't settle. At 1245am I took him and have tried to feed, not interested and now it's 145am and rocking him to sleep. Why is he not tired? Aahhhhh
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How'd the rest of the night go?
I think I would try and keep to 3 hourly feeds in the day, 3.5 at most.
I'd say last night the 1 hour nap at 5/6 probabably knocked him off the 7pm settling and maybe a bit of UT/OT going on. I was always fairly flexible with bedtime but we seem to have from fairly early had a natural 7.30 start to the day and of course now we need to be up for school she's sleeping on to 8!!! At 3.5/4 months she was asleep for the night at 7.30/8.30.
I've found it really tricky with the others. Like tonight the girls have dancing and the baby will sleep in the car and that will knock bedtime later to more like 8.30 as she'll sleep on and off while we're out. And yeaterday she ended up totally OT with the school runs and we'd to visit my wee granny so she just didn't sleep in the afternoon properly.
But from 2/3 months I did need to be aware of just how much day sleep she was getting as it did affect nights.
Has your LO started smiling yet?!
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Thanks. Yes I do think there is some OT/UT going on. Today he fed at 715am, 1030, 130,430pm. He's been cat napping all day and just one 2 hour sleep. It's now 6.15pm and he's really tired but not die a feed until 730pm should I let him have a short nap now and then go for a later bedtime say at 8pm and I guess should I wake him at 7pm ish? He was awake this morning at 7am so a 7pm bedtime would be good but as he's drifting off to sleep now without a feed I guess it will have to be later or do you think i should have fed him and make bedtime now? I'm so confused! He's been smiling and really alert today, has not really Seemed as sleepy. I just don't seem to be able to get a bedtime sorted???
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How is he at feeding early? If he tends to feed ok I'd have been tempted to just feed and pop him to bed for 7. If not just let him doze then do a bigger feed later and bed a bit later.
What did you end up doing? My poor wee missy crashed an OT mess at 7.30. Ugh!
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So he went to sleep at 615pm without a feed so I woke him at 730pm. Felt bad as he looked so happy!! He then settled fairly well after about 8ish as I think he was still pretty tired. DH then fed him at 1130pm but then has struggled to get him to sleep so at 130pm I'm now getting him to sleep with short feed and cuddle. I can't understand why he's not tired after his feed and take so long to fall back to sleep. DH put his dummy in and just put him down but he doesn't settle like that. I cuddle him in my arms until he's in a deep sleep then put him down which might be bad but I'm hoping he's still young it's ok to do this. Maybe tomorrow I could try giving him another feed if he looks like he wants to sleep at 630pm especially if he's awake at 630am?
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Sorry I thought I replied last night when I was up feeding about 2.30!!
I think to just put him down as your DH is is probably expecting a bit much. It's fine to help him.
I wondered if he is waking for that 11pm feed or is your DH doing it as a DF? I find if I can get N fed while she's still sleeping she just goes right back to sleep but if she wakes too much she treats it as nap and Leo's forever getting back to sleep.
How'd the rest of the night go? And today?
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The 1130pm feed was just when DS woke so maybe we could try DF again? Although he took a while to settle after this feed the rest of the night pretty good with a feed at 330am and then he stirred at 530am but instead of me stepping in straight away I realised all of his grunting was him actually still asleep but in light sleep so I drifted back to sleep and then he woke for morning feed at 630am. This evening gone a bit off as I was hoping for just the 1130pm and 330am feed again but as he went down really nicely at 630pm he woke at 1030pm and then at 130am so I'm just settling him back to sleep now. He didn't really want to feed much and I wander if I stepped in too soon or he may have been just thirsty as its a very warm night. I suspect that he will now need another feed before the 630am as I can't see him doing a 5 hour stretch until morning now. I wish I'd tried the pacifier at 130am although probably just as easy to feed.
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Just another quick question. When should I start trying to put to sleep awake and stop rocking to sleep?
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Yeah that 6.30 bedtime makes night feeds tricky Doesnt it? As if he does a good 4 hour stretch then he may well be hungry at 1.30 yk? And it means 4.30/5.30 then morning. Bit of a pain.
You can definitely start putting him down more awake and settling in the Moses basket now but just with the knowledge some times it may work or may not and just keep trying. From about 3/4 weeks I'm sure N was feeding and Id just Pop her awake beside me and she'd go to sleep. That's nights obviously. In the day i ised to wait until drowsy and have a cuddle and put her down awake and she'd go over with a bit of
Sshing. Was hit and miss but I was fairly relaxed about it.
How are you feeling now? Being a mum of three is tricky I find especially now we're back at school and activities. 5-7pm is the worst with homework dinner and the baby just wanting held. Asaaahhhh!!!
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730pm definitely seems to work better. We managed to go for that this eve so he went to 1130pm and then 330pm which is great. The annoying this is in now sitting here at 5am getting him back to sleep as he woke at 430am after going down at 4am after his 330am feed. I'm not sure that he'd actually managed to get himself off into a deep sleep before so just seem to be struggling to get back to sleep. Will be so much better when he can self settle.
I'm loving being a mum of three but do find the lack of sleep tough I have to admit. Yes it's tough juggling the school run, activities and yes definitely the evening is full on with everything. I stupidly have activities of some sort after school every day with the kids too which really adds further stress but in a weird way I quite like all the rushing around. These clubs and things also really do start costing a bomb! By the time number 3 is old enough to do clubs we will be broke lol!!!
Happy weekend without school run chaos
!!!
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Do you think he's waking with wind early on? Or maybe just light cycle of sleep and can't resettle? I found wind woke this one and that 4-7 slot just very unsettled for a good while.
I know having three is wonderful. I love having a teeny baby again although scarily N is nearly 6 months and I'm not nearly ready for her to be getting so big so quick. Have to start thinking of spoon feeding soon!
Hope you've a lovely weekend! We'd no school run but had dancing orchestra and now gymnastics!! My DH always says imagine what we could be doing if we weren't paying out for all these activities!!!
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Pretty rubbish night. Fed 730pm and went to sleep eventually at 9pm. Woke at 11, 2, 330,5 and 615. When a lot of the times when I got him put he really didn't seem hungry. I think he's just waking from light sleep cycles. My DH said we need to leave him to cry a bit but I'm not sure? Will he start to have deeper sleep soon?
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Remind me what age the wee bundle is now?
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4 weeks (just realised I could see when you started the thread DUH)!!
It's possible he's hit the 4 week GS and is building your supply with all the little feeds. The NFs build supply quicker don't they with the hormone levels being different?
What you could do is reduce the holding and start attempting to settle a bit more. So once you've fed and gave a cuddle you could start laying him down and ssh pat. He may get upset (and I assume this is what your DH means as opposed to leaving him to cry to sort himself out?) but you can see if you can build up to getting him to settle out of your arms a bit more?
Hugs xx
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Thanks. Well I think DH was being a bit harsh and actually taking CIO but when I reminded him that our LO is still so very little plus we have never used CIO realised he was being bit harsh!! So I think I will try the shh pat. If he still won't settle do you then use pick up out down and do you just keep going until asleep? X
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Lol well in that case I think you're DH is being very unreasonable 😝😝😝. Even the people who push CIO/CC say not until at least 6 months. And I've found with this baby HVs and midwives were very against any form of CIO where 6 years ago with my dd2 they actually recommended it. Now it's all about psychological wee being!
I would just try gently to resettle with you right there. If he gets very upset and doesn't settle Id just pick up and help him but just have in mind you want to start giving him a chance to sort himself. It's still very early days and he's so tiny so he still make need some help for now.
Hugs xx
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Hi. How are you doing? We are so busy with school and activities but it keeps me busy. We are getting there with feeding and sleeping. Daytime naps tend to just fall into when we are out and about so finding that a bit tricky to get into a routine but that's fine. He's generally falling into a 630/7 routine due to wake up with school run but finding the bedtime tricky. He's generally feeding every three hours so 630,930,1230,330 or often 4 due to school activities etc. he then falls asleep around 515pm abs awake for 6ish. Do you think I should just give another feed at 630pm and try and put straight to bed although he may only be awake for half hour before I'm trying to settle for bed as it seems as if we miss that sleep window he can be up for hours screaming which I think is because he is overtired? Also when he falls asleep at 515pm ish would you wake him at 6pm to feed and get ready for bed? And is i
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We're exactly the same here! Naps tend to be fitting in with life and I do find she is so OT by the end of the day as she isn't getting the best naps but there isn't an awful lot we can do. I have been working on getting her a good morning nap when the kids are at school and hoping that helps longer term although I've been out a lot of mornings so it's not been consistent.
If he's having to wake 7am ish it probably is a good idea to aim for a good feed at 6.30 and aim for bed after. If he's sleeping at 5.15 I would probably wake and treat it as a CN and feed and a short A time and then to bed. Often LOs need a shorter A time after a CN any ways.
Am pleased feeding has settled and is going so well. How are your nights?
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Yes I was getting some good naps in the morning but he seems to have stopped and literally cat napping all day but as you say not much I can do about that due to all the racing around. Nights are up and down but generally he seems to be in a pattern of feeding around 630pm and if lucky going down then or due to OT can be after 8 before he settles. He then asked at 1130pm and again between 230am and 330am then again at 530am. How are your nights?
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I know. It's so hard as our nights are still pretty rubbish. We get a good stretch from 8-1/2 then on and off for the rest of the night. But I know it's because our days need to be more consistent as there is a lot of OT at play yk and I'm sure the catnapping isn't helping. But as it is I'm managing grand and the tiredness really isn't so bad. I just wish I could get that big stretch from 12-7 instead ;). I've tried a DF but it just disturbs her more for some reason.
We'll get sleep at some stage eh?!
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Yes sounds pretty similar to us. Days all over the place and after 2am can be hit and miss. Last night was tough. I seem to have a tummy bug/virus as have had awful tummy cramps and dreadful headache. This DS has it as last night he was screaming practically all night. Today I have really struggled as feeling really poorly and extremely tired. Just about to go to bed in the attempt to get some sleep now. Yes one day we will sleep again!!
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Well I tried bit of cluster feeding yesterday which did seem to change things. As he can be bit unsettled from 4pm and fed at 4,6 and 8pm. He woke at 1am for a feed and settled to sleep fairly quickly and then again at 5am then slept until 645am so going to try again tonight. No doubt tonight will be different again?!! Hope you had a good night x
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I'm so sorry. I didn't see your other post. So sorry you were ill. Are you ok now?
Great news on the cluster feeding. He did great through the night. Our night wasn't actually too bad. We've started weaning so she's been awake a bit with more wind but I think I've been reacting too quick as I left her last night trying to get sorted to feed and when I looked she had went back to sleep herself. It's hard to work on indpendent sleep as a lot of naps are out and about. But she is so incredibly pleasant that it's not an issue (yet!) 😝😝
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Just checking in. How are things? Xxx
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Hi. We are good although I've stopped breastfeeding so still beating myself up. I got really poorly so the doctor said I needed to get some rest so started introducing some more formula which led to my milk supply diminishing and without going into all the details decided to stop. I feel terribly guilty as I fed the other 2 for a year but I know it was the right thing for me and babe and the rest of the family. LO has taken to the formula ok, he's not a massive eater maybe 3 or 4 oz top about every 3 or 4 hours. Nights are still pretty similar. He goes to bed at 630pm, can wake anytime from 11-2 so have has the odd night where he just has 1 feed at 2ish but most nights around 12 and 3am. He's often then unsettled from 4am. We had some awful nights after his 8 week jabs where he was up all night screaming but hoping he's settled now. I just hope he soon starts to settle better after 4am. How are you and LO? X
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Awh hugs xxx
So sorry you had to stop feeding. So disappointing for you after all the work you put in but you've done what's best for your family so don't beat yourself up with guilt xxx
The good thing with bottle feeding is at least you and DH can share the NFs and that rough period from 4am. That's the one thing i resent about BFing!!!
We're doing ok. Sleep had gotten a lot better but since starting solids has been disrupted again but easier to settle if she wakes without a feed. I think she's just a sensitive tummy and still very windy. But we'll get there.
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Yes it's been good in that respect but really miss the BF too. Oh yes you have solids now, have all that to come. I think I just need to get used to my day starting at 4am for a while. He goes to bed early at 630pm so I guess with his naps he's probably not that tired at 4am??!! Good lucking getting back on track abc thanks for all your support. Well done for still BF xx