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SLEEP => Night Wakings => Topic started by: annegirl on January 23, 2018, 03:01:43 am

Title: 9 mo Night Wakings
Post by: annegirl on January 23, 2018, 03:01:43 am
Hey there,

My husband and I have been doing pu/pd for 2 and a half weeks. Our 9 mo girl who used to not sleep in her crib is now sleeping in her crib and going to sleep without us rocking her. However, she is still waking up multiple times a night, like 2-6 times per night. We've got her on an EASY routine now which has fixed her food-sleep association (she used to eat before sleeping).

Should we expect it to take even more time given her age and considering she has improved some?

Or should we be doing something different? It's starting to feel like we aren't making any more progress. The NW hasn't changed (it actually got worse for about a week) and it seems like having a hand on her back has become her new prop for settling and going to sleep.
Title: Re: 9 mo Night Wakings
Post by: creations on January 23, 2018, 18:56:33 pm
Hi there are welcome :)

Sounds like you've made great progress.
NWs (might waking) can be caused by all sorts of things.  Does she have a night feed?
It can also be linked to the day time routine, what time BT (bed time) and WU (wake up in the morning) are, teething and many other possibilities too so it isn't always a case of just doing more of the PUPD but perhaps a bit of detective work to see if there is a reason for the NWs.
If you would like to post your current EASY times we could have a look and see if anything jumps out as possibly causing the NWs.

it seems like having a hand on her back has become her new prop for settling and going to sleep.
This can be relatively easily weaning over the space of a few days or a week. You need to keep your goal in mind so that you (as parents and any other carers who put her to sleep) don't get carried away with the hand on the back but rather you focus on reducing the weight and listing it off.  Begin your wind down as usual, cuddles, shush/pat etc then when you get to the point of her being in her cot, calm with your hand on her back reduce the weight, lift your hand off but not away, replace it to reassure, then lift off again.  A little on/off and movement of the hand can get her used to continuing to feel relaxed and confident but without relying on the firm hand being there.
If she begins to get upset put your hand back on her, say a key phrase such as "it's okay, sleepy time now" but as soon as she is calming do on/off again.  The aim is for her to nod off when your hand is off her even if it is only 1cm away from her.
From there you can begin work on leaving the room. A key phrase which is repeated is useful as you can also say it from across the room or outside the door offering reassurance without necessarily going back.

Hope this helps
Title: Re: 9 mo Night Wakings
Post by: annegirl on January 24, 2018, 11:12:48 am
Thanks. I think we need to start weaning her off going to sleep with our hand on her back.

She does still have one night feed, although recently she has not eaten very many solids and so wants to eat twice at night. That is inconsistent though. I also think she is getting several teeth, but it is taking longer than 3 days as the book stated was normal.

Her typical EASY routine is

6:30-7 Wake up and breaestfeed
7:15-7:30 Breakfast (solids)
Activity
9-9:30 Nap (only ever one hour at most)
11 Breastfeed
12:15 Lunch (solids)
Activity
1:30-2 Nap (only ever one hour and she really fights going down for this nap)
4 Breastfeed
5 Dinner
Activity
6 Start bathtime and bedtime routine
6:30-7 Bedtime
Title: Re: 9 mo Night Wakings
Post by: creations on January 25, 2018, 19:50:40 pm
It looks like her A time could do with extending which could help her sleep a bit better in the day (one longer nap and less resistance to naps) and as a result more soundly at night.
At 9 months an A time could be around 3.5hrs, some LOs like one A time longer or one shorter so they are not necessarily all exactly the same length across the day. Often there will be one longer nap and one shorter too because with the longer A times there isn't always enough time in the day to fit in 2 long naps.
You might already have an idea of which A time and nap would increase more easily for your LO or to fit around baby groups or family circumstance, this isn't a one size fits all solution.
As example your day might look like this:
WU 6.30
A 3.5hr
S 10.00 - 11.30 (longer nap 1.5hr or 2hr)
A 3.5hr
S 3.00 - 4.00 (shorter nap 1hr or maybe just a 40 min CN)
A 3hr
BT 7pm

As your A times look to be around 2.5hrs at the moment I'd suggest you increase in increments of 15 mins every other day (or every 3 days) to avoid a big leap which can cause OT.  If you get wake ups mid-nap you may need to resettle her to help her sleep longer or use a W2S (wake to sleep) if short napping is an issue.

think she is getting several teeth, but it is taking longer than 3 days as the book stated was normal.
teething can really drag on.  Teeth can move without cutting for days, weeks or months before they finally cut through.  The final cutting for my DS would be 3 nights or less but those few nights were *significantly* worse than the rest of the general teething.  The general teething was bad enough, I didn't know it could get worse than that.
If you suspect teething pain you can try medicating at BT and see if it helps.  Pain or illness always needs responding to and is not really a suitable time for sleep training although gentle training such as weaning a hand on the back is certainly possible.  You will need to return to Lo every time there is a NW whether it is sleep training related or teething related to maintain the bond of trust.  it can be exhausting but it does eventually pass.

Hope this helps
Title: Re: 9 mo Night Wakings
Post by: annegirl on January 25, 2018, 22:23:19 pm
Thanks for the suggestions. We will work on adjusting her schedule to see if it helps.

Currently she is so overtired from fighting naps and waking up more and more every night, that I don't know how to help her catch up. Every day seems to get worse and worse both at nap times and night times. She woke up 8 times last night, 2 of them took her over half an hour to go back to sleep for. She's been fighting her afternoon naptime for a solid hour now, and my husband is still in the room trying to do pupd with her. Any advice for how to get back on track? We're all desperate for ANY sleep over here. I'd have already given up on pupd if rocking her or letting her sleep in our bed even worked any more. They don't though, which is why we started BW.
Title: Re: 9 mo Night Wakings
Post by: creations on January 26, 2018, 14:34:08 pm
If she is fighting the nap due to UT (under tiredness) she could be going right past her appropriate A time and resulting in OT.
I would just go ahead and begin extending the A time.  if she is resisting or crying as soon as you go into her room to start the wind down this can be an opportunity to extend more than you had planned, she could well be telling you she just isn't ready for a nap (even though overall she is getting less sleep and having rough nights).  I would respond by saying something like "Oh dear looks like I've brought you for a nap too soon, okay then lets go and play for a while instead" and bring her out, do another 15-30 min A time and try again.
Her current A time looks to be about 2.5hrs in places when some LOs this age can do 4hrs, so it it quite significant and often LO's fussing can be misinterpreted as OT when they are UT.  LOs can end up OT from fighting naps but often in cases where the A time is too short the way forward is to extend it, there's more chance of accepting the nap and eventually napping better.
Title: Re: 9 mo Night Wakings
Post by: annegirl on January 27, 2018, 18:25:31 pm
Thanks. We've started extending her morning A time (mostly be default as she's been waking up earlier) and she's been doing better last night and today. Hoping it's a lasting change!