BabyWhispererForums.com
EAT => Eating For Toddlers => Topic started by: Jess-J&E on May 12, 2006, 14:07:21 pm
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I know this has been written before (which should make me feel better) but I would love some input.
I am stressing so much about feeding my son. He will be two in July and really doesn't enjoy eating. Last night his dinner was two pine nuts ::) and one really small piece of cheese with water, that is it. He just doesn't seem interested. He won't eat meat or peanut butter or beans but he does get protein through milk and cheese but that is it. I guess I am just tired of fighting him at every meal. Sometimes the only way I can get him to sit still and eat is to put him in a chair and put on some Baby Einstein so he can munch a little while he watches.
The main stressor with this is that if I let him skip a meal like he wants to do he gets extremely cranky and as his blood sugar drops he kind of breaks down. The same feeling adults get if they don't eat enough. So I end up chasing him with fruit and cheese all day just to keep a little something in his tummy.
He is also waking at 5am and has been for a year or so now and he wants milk, he is hungry! He is hysterical if you try and hold him off and I don't want to if he is hungry, but he doesn't go back to sleep so it makes things a little tough on me. Maybe 5am is just his time to be awake but on the random days he eats, he doesn't wake up ravenous and grouchy. Know what I mean?
I guess what I am looking for is to hear that this is normal and that it will pass. I feel like I am somehow failing him with nutrition but I cannot force him and I don't want to do that. I want him to enjoy eating so I know that if I push it he will push back.
Any thoughts?
Jess
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Hey Jess -
I have no brilliant reply other than to say that he won't starve himself.
I stopped giving Henry pureed veggies about a week ago. He has not had veggies since then. He won't eat them. And he's gotten to the point where he pretty much refuses dinner. Three nights ago he had a handful of Cheerios for dinner. Two nights ago he had milk - nothing to eat, only milk. Last night he had milk - nothing to eat again, only milk.
That being said, he does eat a good breakfast, lunch and snack. It may be he's just not hungry at dinner but I totally understand your frustration. I just keep offering him healthy choices and hope that he'll eat when he's hungry.
Other than that, I don't know what to say other than, again, he won't starve himself.
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Jess-
I feel for you! Tyler's been through a few phases of that, and I know what you mean about the blood sugar crankies! What are Ethan's favorite foods? My way around it was to let him choose between 2 things at each meal, and I'd try to make at least one of the choices something I knew he liked and hadn't already eaten that day (not always possible, though!). Then I'd do my best to sneak other stuff in there to bulk it up and help balance his nutrition. In the last month or so, he's gotten much better but he still has his staples, and I still sneak stuff in anyway. I know how frustrating it is, but honestly, it does pass if you don't let him see what a big deal it is to you. And like Sarah said, he won't starve himself, but I know what you're saying about his blood sugar. Maybe offer him a few sips of milk instead of pressuring him to eat?
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Sarah and Melissa....of course the two of you would reply, you are always there to encourage me in a bind. Thank you so much for your words of wisdom and the similar stories. It really does help to hear that other kids only have milk. It seems like so many people say, "my child won't eat" but they really have some food. The milk only thing is so familiar to me, whew, I am not alone!
Thanks again ladies, I will perservere.
Jess
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Jess-
If you want to share a few of Ethan's favorite things to eat, I'd be more than happy to help you think of some ways to add to it!
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Hey Jess -
Tonight for dinner I offered Henry cooked carrots (which he'll eat at daycare), pasta with butter (which he'll eat at daycare) and garlic bread (which he LOVES). You know what he had for dinner?
MILK!! That's it - nothing else. He didn't even ask for anything else - just sat there and played with my hair while I ate dinner. ::)
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I too can identify with what you are going through. We are thinking of having a second child and I find myself wondering will it be this tough with the next one???? I sure hope not! Let us know how it goes :)
Julie
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Sarah- LOL about the milk for dinner, well not really funny but it sure did make me feel better. How are the veggies going? Have you tried dipping them in a little ranch? Ethan likes to be able to dip his cucumbers and carrots in ranch dressing, just a thought. Also I can get him to eat peas and corn if they are forzen! I don't know why but he likes them that way...we call it ice corn, lol.
Melissa- Thanks for the offer but I am not sure I am worried about the variety that Ethan eats but the amount. He will eat a wide variety of foods ( no meat or beans like I said) but he will try other things. He just doesn't want to eat a lot, I think one strawberry would be enough for a meal for him. Do you think that will change with time? Maybe he is eating too many snacks in between meals and he isn't hungry enough? How much do you offer for a snack? How long in between meals and snacks for you?
Thanks again! Jubee you too, thank you. I wonder the same thing about the second one. I just hope I am more relaxed by then and hopefully he/she will be too :)
Jess
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Aahh... it's so nice to hear I'm not alone.
Lilah eats almost nothing. But she also won't drink much milk. She will eat dried fruit, crackers, dry cereal, and cheese, she will drink about 6 oz. of kefir (fruit-flavored) and about 6-8 oz milk in a day. The rest is hit or miss. She may eat breakfast, or she may eat half a bite and say, "All done!" She may eat lunch, or she may pick the shredded cheese off her pasta, eat two noodles, and say, "all done!", like today. She may eat a little dinner, or she may not. Usually not. Pretty much I can only count on her to eat snacks consistently. So you're not alone. And boy, I can commiserate! It is so frustrating!
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Jess-
We actually stopped doing snacks a few months ago because Tyler wasn't eating much at mealtimes. His mealtimes now are usually 830, 12, and 6. I do always keep crackers with me in case he's hungry while we're out, and there are days that I offer snacks because it's obviously a hungry day, and we'll give snacks if we plan to move dinner later or something. Other than that, no snacks. If he asks, I'll limit him to a few crackers or a strawberry unless it's obvious that he's super hungry and he's been eating well all day. Does that makes sense?
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I never thought about dropping snacks completely, hmmmm, maybe I will give that a try. At least the snacks after lunch, that way he would most likely eat a good dinner. I am amazed that Tyler will go from 12-6 without eating much, that is a long stretch even for me! But that gives me a plan, thanks!
Sabrina- Sorry to hear you two are struggling with the same things. It is really hard, mostly because of worry I guess. I am sure you feel like me, you only want the best for your dd and good nutritions is high on the list. Hang in there and know you are not alone!
Jess
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I too used to have a 5am starving waker too. What worked for us was to not get rid of snacks, because he just seemed to like small meals rather than completely filling up 3 times a day, but I started making the snacks like mini-meals - so I'd offer a balanced diet over the course of a day and meals may not have looked "traditional". My ds used to fill up before lunch and then taper off as the day got on. So what I did was the meal which he ate the most at which was morning snack and lunch I started offering "dinner" type food - meat and vege or whatever for lunch, and morning snack was quite substantial as well, so by the time dinner came around and I knew he wouldn't eat much, that it didn't matter if he nibbled at a few bites only, at least I knew it was balanced over the day. Even now at 3, he eats his biggest meal at snack and lunch time - I just have to go with it. If you continue with snacks, maybe offer him a platter of fruit/carrot/tomato/cheese etc. I found for my ds that making little vegetable patties made of different combo of veges went down REALLY well, so he'd have those maybe 4 times a week and I'd change the variety.
I think if he's maintaining/gaining weight well and doing ok, then he's listening to his body's need.
It will get better. :)
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we too are in the same situation .Ryan isn't even a milk lover , he has no variety but what he does eat gives him nutrients i guess ::). we tried cutting the snacks out but found it made no difference at all to meal times , he still wasn't interested. it was soo stressfull having food battles at meal times that i now let him graze through the day . we have good days where he will eat quite a bit.
he is gaining weight fine and he's super active so i tend to relax more and hope that in time things change .
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Callum was a milk only baby. Even now at 5 years old, if I gave him milk for breakfast, lunch and dinner, he would be thrilled. And of course the milk is so filling he doesnt' eat anything. I had to cut out some of his milk to get him to eat anything.
I did put cereal in his milk at night for a while to get him a bit fuller to sleep longer (he was 1+ at the time)
Good Luck - try not to worry to much, he really wont' starve himself
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i have tried the no snacks approach so that he knows the difference between a full and empty tummy , it made no difference , he just went on less food in the day , and we had the constant asking for snacks in the day. the hardest part for us is getting him to try new foods ::) .he's got to the point where he is willing to play with the new food but then saya "bin " or the dog gets it ::)
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oh we have tried everything . like i say i have now given up on food battles.
he use to sit in his highchair all the time , then we tried the table with us ,now we put his plate on the coffee table in the lounge and let him eat as he wants , by doing this he eats more although it takes forever as he wanders around. we have found he eats more at his early morning snack time so we offer a meal , this has worked for a while , then after his nap he tends to snack . Dinner tends to be hardest.
i'm not worried anymore , i will keep trying to introduce new foods but won't get stressed about his limited menu . the hardest part is when you go out for the day , trying to find foods he will eat ! another trick we found that works is to have his meal and put some crisps/fries on the plate aswell , treat it as a picnic !
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Ryan's Mum- I hear ya about the difficulty of going out, that is so hard. My family is big on dinners together and it really is hard for me to figure out how to feed him when we aren't home. Not only does he not want to eat much but he gets so distracted when other people are around that it makes the problem worse. Anyway I feel for you! Some day when these boys are 16 and eating us out of house and home we will laugh about this :)
As for the "snacks" or "no snacks" I am going to fool with it a bit and find out if he is indeed just a grazer or if he is filling up on other things. This has been a great discussion! Thanks again
Jess
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I definetly hear you about the feeding him when your not at home. Going to others houses for dinner I always feel like I have to bring something along. He also gets very distracted!!! Funny that you mention that. Even going on a short maybe couple day trip becomes a bit of an ordeal because of it. We are planning a trip to Walt Disney World in Sept...should be interesting. But really ds has got to learn to adapt a bit better. Eventually he will try new foods without such caution I hope!!!
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Hi there!
I read Nikki's post about making homeade "veggie patties"....can you tell me what's in them and how to make them? It sounds like a great way to get those veggies in!
Thanks!
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Hi CW :)
There are several varieties:
The mashed sort: potato/pumpkin/brocolli/cauli/carrot etc (any combo will do, just make potato the majority) all boiled and mashed with butter, add an egg and some flour to bind and lightly fry in oil (you can also add canned salmon which goes down well here when it doesn't any other way)
The grated (Shredded) sort: raw grated carrot/potato/zucchini (courgette)/onion - squeeze well, add an egg and flour and lightly fry for about 4mins each side - I was surprised that these go down, they're not sweet but are tasty.
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Stacy, that's a great idea...Tyler's on a chicken nuggets with ketchup kick, so I might have to give that a shot!
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See, Lilah won't even eat the (Quorn) chicken nuggets (we're vegetarian). She will eat the ketchup, though... dip whatever it is into it and lick it off. ::) So I doubt the veggie patties will be a hit. The only way I get veggies into her these days is in carrot or pumpkin muffins (unless it's corn, or occasionally peas-- though sometimes, she will say "peas yuck"-- these two "veggies" she will eat sometimes). She eats lots of dired apricots for her beta carotene... that's pretty much all I can get into her these days.
I've also found that limiting snacks really makes no difference. One of these days, I'm going to get my act together and try making her after-nap snack her main evening meal, and then she can just snack with us at dinner, to see if that helps. She does tend to eat more at snack-time, so it's worth a shot. Luckily we don't have sleep issues because of the eating, but she does wake up pretty grumpy in the morning.
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Ryan won't have nuggets either ::) .he loves ketchup , we tried putting it on the plate with everything to see if it encouraged him to eat , but no !
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Not sure where you live but in the UK you can buy prepared toddler meals - like Kiddylicious and Birds Eye. I've never tried Birds Eye but I know that the Kiddylicious meals are free of salt and rubbish - just good quality food. And because they come in brightly coloured boxes with pretty pics on the front, I let my DS choose between say a cottage pie or a salmon with broccoli and pasta. Because he's chosen it and because it looks like a 'snack' thanks to the exciting box, he tends to eat them more readily. That said, he doesn't always eat them still - but it might be worth a try.
The other thing I've done when my DS has gone through food strikes is to have picnics. I either spread a towel on the kitchen or lounge floor or go outside if it's nice and make the meal more of a game. I tend to go for carrot sticks, cucumber and pita bread with hummus and pieces of cheese, strips of ham etc. For some reason, eating on the floor seems a lot more exciting than eating at the table, and they tend to eat more. But I do preface it by saying: special treat, today we can have a picnic. Otherwise it becomes something that he always wants to do and I want him to still eat at the table most of the time.
Also, I don't know many kids who won't eat pasta - specially if they're in cool shapes. I've had pasta in the shape of letters, or farfalle which we call butterflies or shells which we call snails - and if you can make a sauce that has lots of hidden veg in it that is blended up, with a grating of cheese on top, I can usually convince my DS to eat it. ( we tend to call our food funny things quite a lot to get him interested - for example, strips of yellow pepper are yellow worms, strips of onion are purple worms or slugs, sweetcorn are ladybirds etc. Now personally, that would put me right off eating but for my boy, it's like an open invitation to tuck in. ::)
Not sure if these ideas will help but just some thoughts. Hang in there.