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41
General Sleep Issues / Re: 2w old, confusion about sleep time!
« Last post by Katet on February 20, 2021, 03:48:13 am »
I think you are trying too hard with a two week old baby.

A lot of research has changed since the BW books were written and the idea of EASY is great, but respect for your baby and their natural rhythms when they are under 3months old is far more important.

There is nothing wrong with letting a baby sleep in your arms after a feed, the problem is when it's the only way they will sleep because they have never had a chance to fall asleep any other way.
Also a little bit of grunting and whimpering can be part of how a baby falls asleep, so don't expect them to just switch off with no noise.

Honestly I'm going to say the biggest mistake you can make as a parent is to worry about 'geeting it wrog' or 'making them dependent' because the thing you need to do is show them they are loved and YOU ARE dependable no matter what and by a parent trying to do everything by the book, you make the mistake of not parenting the child you have...which is actually more 'wrong' because you don't understand your child and makes it hard to have unconditional love, if you feel the child isn't conforming to the ideal the book has for you.

My suggestion would be that by 6 weeks your baby probably will wake up after feeds far more than not  but for now just enjoy your baby and don't force an awake time.
42
General Sleep Issues / 2w old, confusion about sleep time!
« Last post by Manu88 on February 10, 2021, 22:58:46 pm »
Hi everyone, I recently became a dad and am trying to follow the EASY routine with my 2 week old baby.

I really don't know what to do about bedtime because he always falls asleep after breastfeeding and there is no way to wake him up. I have tried everything but he continues to sleep unperturbed, skipping the activity phase.
So I decide to change him and at the exact moment I am about to open his diaper he wakes up and has no intention to sleep anymore.
This frustrates me a lot because when I try to wake him up he doesn't open his eyes while he suddenly wakes up when I use soft hands.
Sometimes, however, I manage to wake him up after the meal and he stays active for a few minutes (sometimes more than 1 hour) and then falls asleep easily when he starts to show the first signs of tiredness.
What should I do?

He starts yawning so it's obvious he's tired and wants to sleep so I swaddle him in a muslin and help him calm down with the sshhh-pat method but as soon as I put him in the crib he starts to make grimaces with his tongue and mouth because of his bowel movements.
I also think that breastfeeding tires him out a lot because of the oral exercise.
Sometimes my girlfriend lets him fall asleep after the feeding and this bothers me because it does not respect the natural succession of the phases expected by EASY. It seems that this EASY is not so easy... Or maybe it is me who is too strict.
Other times, my girlfriend tries to get him to fall asleep in her arms and I' m afraid this may lead to him developing dependencies on external help.

I guess I am in total confusion. Has anyone had the same experience and know how to guide me?

Thank you very much
43
Sleeping For Toddlers / Help! 2.75 yo with suddenly messy sleep
« Last post by lepetitmatin on February 04, 2021, 20:25:22 pm »
My 2y8mo old has been an amazing sleeper since he was a baby (was a thumb sucker, stopped just before 2). For many months he had a reliable schedule, awake 6:30/7, nap 2-330, bedtime 8pm. Then suddenly about a month ago, he started stalling a ton at bedtime and naptime, and started waking at night. The night wakings have gotten progressively worse. We tried a lot of different techniques. At one point for about a week and a half my husband had to sleep in his room with him because my son’s anxiety was so bad when we’d leave. We have been working hard to reassure him and rebuild his sense of security and attachment, and now we’re just trying to get back on track. Right now everything is all over the place trying to figure out a good schedule for him as he seems to be done with his nap (doesn’t fall asleep for nap easily - it was taking an hour, and now he won’t nap at all). Even putting him down early for bedtime backfires because it takes him forever to fall asleep. The past few nights, he’ll go down around 745, have a 2-3 night wakings where we have to settle him (last night I just spoke to him through the monitor for a couple of them), but then he’s up at 5:30. Seems OT but since he won’t nap and takes forever to fall asleep, not sure what else to do. Going to try 6:30 bedtime tonight and see if it helps. What else can I do?

He had a clock that turns green when he’s allowed to get up, but he started ignoring it around the same time this all happened. He’s a master climber and has climbed out of his crib and over the baby gate at his door easily. So basically, the problems are getting him to sleep without us, not needing us in the night, staying in his crib, and obeying his light. Baby whisperer was a huge help with my older one 6 years ago so thought I’d turn back to all you lovely ladies for help once again. Thank you!
44
General Sleep Issues / Re: 3.5 month old - difficult to sleep/short naps
« Last post by sisi11 on February 02, 2021, 08:23:02 am »
Also I have a few more questions?
- What is the ultimate goal of the shhgpat/PUPD - and how is falling asleep look like and for what period you are supposed to achieve that? Shall you just sit there and do nothing or you can pat/shh/sing? I am practicing it for more than a month now, and each time my baby cries a lot. I eventually either put him in bed when almost asleep or use a pacifier.
- Is using pacifier OK for falling asleep?
- Shall I wait until situation gets better with night sleep in order to apply the methid for day naps or is it done simultaneously?
45
Sleeping For Toddlers / Our DD still hasn't adjusted to1 nap. Is daycare the issue??
« Last post by Cubs12019 on February 02, 2021, 01:49:49 am »
Hello. our DD is 2 weeks away from 19 months. The moment she was put in the toddler class at her daycare at 15 months our once sleeping beauty started to truly struggle w/ sleep. After a few weeks of being in the toddler room she stared show what i thought to be signs of dropping her second nap to match what was being done at daycare (kiddies nap from 12:30-2:30). So after a week or two of her occasionally skipping her morning nap i decided it was time to drop to one nap. At this point we are almost to 16 months and she finally started taking one 2.5 hour nap. Keep in mind when she was on two naps she would sleep for 3.5 hours total. After 3 days of taking 2.5 hour naps she then started to regress at went to 2,1.5,1 hour nap total. We were consistent and kept her at 1 nap up until she turned 17 months and then decided she obviously wasn't getting the sleep she needed. So at 17 months we decided to move her back to two and at the same time her vocabulary exploded and we had an early 18 month regression on our hands. She had all the signs. We made it through that entire month of only one 30 min everyday for 1 month, although at daycare she was sleeping for 1.5 hours. Once we surpassed that phase i thought maybe her 1 nap will become longer and better. NOPE! All of that being said since she's ben on 1 nap she sleeps from 12-1:15 and is tired by 4pm. Turns into an absolute fuss pot. Bed time is 6:30/6:45. Falls asleep within 15min. Wake time is between 6:30/6:45.
What do i do? Put her back on a 2 nap schedule? She's always been on the side of needing more sleep then most kids her age. She goes to daycare 4days a week, so do we just try and fix the problem on the 3days we have her home with us?

That was a lot! I would really appreciate and sort of advice. Ps. Naps don't need to be pushed back. it results with the same amout of sleep.
46
General Sleep Issues / 3.5 month old - difficult to sleep/short naps
« Last post by sisi11 on February 01, 2021, 11:52:12 am »
Hello there, I am new to this forum and I would be glad to get some advice on applying Shh pat/PUPD method.
First, our story short - since birth, my son never fell asleep on his own - at first while breastfeeding, then with bouncing on gym ball and/or baby wrap, and most commonly with rocking and singing or shhing. Until recently, all of the naps happened on myself as I could not transfer him on the bed disregarding of the time. He woke up either immediately or 5-20 minutes later.
For a month now, I am trying the shh pat method for night sleep but I am not sure if I do it right. Very often he wakes up several times within the first hour.
First of all I carry him across the dark room and sing a song or two. After that I swaddle him. Very often he starts crying. Until he calms down, I still sing a song or shh and pad him first walking then I sit still. Sometimes I give a pacifier. When he starts to close eyes I transfer him to the cot and shh/pat. Most of the times he becomes upset, open eyes widely and cries. If he does not calm down by shh/pat and paci, I pick him up and repeat from start. For the PUPD method, I am not sure - shall I do the shh/pat until he is asleep or only untill calm and then I just sit there and expect him to fall asleep on his own?

My biggest problem though is the day naps, I try the same procedure to help him fall asleep, however he always wakes up at ariund 30 minutes and whatever I try he either won't fall back to sleep, or falls asleep for maximum 10 minutes. Only way to have longer day naps is to baby wear him and move or to hold him in my hands and when he moves I start walking and singing or shushung (and even this works only occasionally).

In the stroller or in the car it is the same story-wakes up moody after 30 min and cannot fall back to sleep (it happened may be 2 times only to give him a paci and after 10 minutes to fall back to sleep)

I am desparate and feel this is a never ending story. Please help!
47
General Sleep Issues / Re: 5 month old - Dropping catnap?
« Last post by AnaQ on January 28, 2021, 20:04:27 pm »
I may not be tons of help as it’s been a while since my daughter was that age and my son isn’t quite that old yet but from what I remember with my daughter who was a sleeper was it took us almost 2 months to fully drop the catnap. She would have it on the days naps weren’t as long and when she had marathon naps we would skip it but also have a bit earlier bedtime. Do you think even if your son was to drop it once in a while he would last all the way from 4-8pm without getting OT? Cuz that would not help him sleep for sure! Eventually she just stopped needing it but it definitely was a long time of the in between stage for her but she slept A LOT. Even now at 2 she sleeps around 15 hours a day. And I will add she didn’t start needing less til 7 months and then dropped it by 9 months. But like I said, a sleeper.

As to the rest of your questions I just am a bit out of touch with that age  so I probably wouldn’t want to throw in my two cents
48
General Sleep Issues / Re: Won’t calm down
« Last post by AnaQ on January 28, 2021, 03:59:42 am »
This has been how I try to schedule our days..

E/a 6:30/7
S 7:15/7:45 (depends on morning wake time)
E/a 10
S 10:50
E/a 12:30
S 1:20
E/a 3:30
S 4:20 (this nap is usually rough as he doesn’t always sleep well)
A 5:15-6 depending on how nap went; eating at 6
S 6:30 bed (or 7 if the nap went well but it usually doesn’t)
8:30 & 11pm feeds; 1-2 motn feeds

We don’t do much haha it’s my 2 year old daughter, me & him (husband works from home so helps when absolutely becessary but usually doing his own thing). We chill and read, tummy time, mobile time, cuddles, bath time.. that’s kind of all we do in our days while he is awake
49
General Sleep Issues / 5 month old - Dropping catnap?
« Last post by regina1987m on January 27, 2021, 22:59:46 pm »
Hello BW,

I am veteran to this forum and have read the book religiously for every pregnancy (currently on LO #3) and although I thought for the third time around I wouldn't be this anxious (this damn pandemic is not helping) I feel like it is now more than ever that I need this to work so that I can have a little bit of  quality time with my daughters!

My little guy is 5 months (23 weeks) and has been a pretty great sleeper from the get go. He did have some developmental 45min intruders but we past that at 3.5-4 months. I also weaned him from the pacifier because although he had eliminated his MOTN feedings, he started waking up 6-10 times a night for his Paci. We went through that great, actually I think that is what really helped him connect cycles during nap time too.

Over the past week, my LO has been waking earlier and earlier in the morning and not being able to go back to sleep as he used to just two weeks ago. He used to sleep for 12 hrs (sometimes even more) each night, and now we're a little shy of 11 (10.5-11 to be exact, never past 11). Although I try and leave him until his DWT of 8:00, he is suddenly waking 30-1 hour before this time. Today, for the first time, he even cried for a few minutes trying to resettle, with no luck. Also today, naps haven't been great either and have been going downhill for about a week. Usually he naps 1.5-2 hrs for the first nap and 1-1.5 for the second nap + a catnap of 30-45 min, but he has gotten older and since his awake times are increasing, I feel like the catnap is getting so close to bedtime that is disrupting his night sleep... could this be possible?
I am starting to think he needs more awake time throughout the day? Or maybe he needs longer A times? Should we drop the catnap?
I will post our schedule for the past few days (on a good day). Please help!


8:00  DWT/ Feeds 8oz expressed milk (lately he wakes up 30min-1 hour early, although I pick him up at 8. He does not cry just stays quietly and regularly fell back to sleep, although lately he doesn't.)
8:15 - 9:50 Activity Time 2 hrs
9:50 Wind down consists of diaper change, sleep sack, lights out, white noise and put down wide awake. Usually takes 1-5 min to fall asleep.
10:00 Sleep - he usually takes close to a 2hr nap. Never less than 1.5 (today 1.10 ???)
12:00 Wake up / Feeds 8oz of expressed milk
2:10 Wind down, same conditions as above.
2:50 Sleep - he usually takes close to 1 hr - 1.15 (today 40 min  ???)
4:00 Wake up/ Feeds 8oz of formula
6:00 Catnap 30-40 min, I tend to cap it at 6:40 if he is not awake by then. He doesn't fight the catnap because he never does it on his crib, it is usually outside with sisters, on stroller.
8:00 Feeds 9oz of formula
8:15 Bedtime, wide awake. He can take 5-20 min to fall asleep independently. Hoping that when I eliminate the catnap I can put him down at 8.
He regularly sleeps through 11.5-12 hrs, although lately he has been waking up earlier each day  ???


Do you see something I can tweak to make a difference?
Thank you so much for your help!!!!
50
General Sleep Issues / Re: Won’t calm down
« Last post by regina1987m on January 27, 2021, 22:36:15 pm »
Hi! I have not much expertise, but would you post your day? Maybe I can help, sounds like my baby!
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