Ready to give up:(

[jaclyngagnon]

Well I have been struggling with feeding my 5 month old for what seems like the entire 5 months. He is getting more and more irritated be bfing. He has never even had a bottle before so I dont understand why he hate bfing soooo much. He pulls off and screams every single time he feeds. Morning and night. He just keeps crying and screaming throughout the entire time he is feeding. He is a fat think and I know he gets enough but I cant stand the crying and tugging and pulling every 3 hours! He wakes our other two children up at every feed at night (which is sadly still every 3 hours) I cant take it any more. I beleive in natural organic unprocessed and unrefined food so it is a very difficult decision to switch to formula that is the complete opposite of all of those qualities...but I just cant do it much longer I honestly thought it was a stage and that he would go back to a normal eating attitude but he is just getting worse. I really wanted to be one of those extended nursing moms with happy healthy kids but I guess I just wont.
   If anyone has any words of encouragement..or even words of wisdom...something...I'm listening. Thanks. Jaclyn.

[deenz]

(((hugs))) sorry I don't have many words of advice, but just wanted to post anyway. 

Does your ds do the crying for the whole feed, or does it happen later in the feed?  When did this behaviour start?  Does he nap well and sleep well at night otherwise?  Has he always fed 3hrly around the clock or is this a recent thing?

With a bit more info maybe we will be able to find out why this is happening.   

[weeza]

Hi there! So sorry you are having a hard time. You mentioned it's getting worse. I know a lot of the mums are having problems around the 4 months mark - my baby has always fed well but suddenly he's bored and complaining after only a few minutes now (he's 4 months old). Maybe he just got more efficient? It's so frustrating not knowing, isn't it? Why don't you check out the 4-6months birth club board. You'll find LOTS of other mummies in the same boat, and maybe one of them will have some useful advice.
Hugs.

[weeza]

PS _ Don't give up!! I've felt very ready to give up in the last couple of weeks too. I'm hanging on to see if things get better.
Maybe you could weigh him before and after a feed without pushing him to feed for longer than he wants, this way you can check if he's just a super efficient eater and done in seconds?!

[Samuel's mum]

HUGS

There are a couple of things that could be going on.

First off - at 5 months a lot of babies can manage longer intervals than 3 hours so he might be more motivated if you gently try and stretch his intervals. Have you tried this at all so far?
He may have got into the habit of breastfeeding so frequently (and eveyr 3 hours over 24 hours is A LOT of milk) and appreciates the comfort but actually when it comes to it he isn't actually wanting the milk at the breast. And is looking for comfort sucking instead - could he be overtired? How are his naps?

If he really seems unhappy during a feed and wakes up constantly at night I would also visit the reflux board and make sure you've ruled that out as a possibility (which obviously wouldn't go away as an issue if you move to bottlefeeding.)

Have you ever had any breastfeeding support in real life? It might be worth one more chat with a breastfeeding counsellor/ lactation consultant as they may have a piece of the puzzle that solves everything.

But lastly don't forget that to breastfeed for 5 months is a real achievement and whatever happens in the future you should remember that.

[jaclyngagnon]

To hopefully answer all the questions...here goes.
I do think that he has reflux, and that he isnt nearly as hungry as he portrays, however he wont take a sucky when he acts hungry. Only bfing will do even though he is so squirmy while feeding. His naps I try to keep regular but I am often out of the house so he sleeps while I run around town. At night he goes to bed at 9 but wakes up at 10 to feed. and then at 1 and 4-5 and 7am. A little erratic. Or if I wait to put him to bed till 11(sometimes he just wont go down before then) he sleeps right till 5 and feeds and then till 9am when he gets up. Now I try to do the EASY schedule but with a little variation day to day. I dont really keep track but I dont bf to sleep. He does however NEED a sucky to go to sleep with. He spends a good deal of the day with it in his mouth. Ummm...thats about all the info I have to give. Thanks. Jaclyn.

[Samuel's mum]

If you think he has reflux have you mentioned that to your doctor? It might be that he would benefit from some treatment. Do visit our reflux board too:

 https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?board=13.0

[vacamex]

Hi Jaclyn: Just wanted to share my experience. My baby girl had very bad feedings sometimes. She seemed hungry but pulled off the breast, arched her back and in general just had a hard time. I never saw her vomiting (key sign of reflux for some doctors) but definitely noticed the back arching and brought it up with our new ped. He told me about "silent reflux" where babies don't spit up but still have the heartburn.
Now she's on medication and her feedings have changed completely and she's much happier. We're still working on the sleep though
Hope this helps, good luck!

[Erin (redstarfalling)]

I had an experience with silent reflux too - a lot like what you describe.  Nursing was a nightmare - screaming and squirming through every feed, waking often at night. I finally ended up in tears at her doctor's office when she was 6 months old. By the second type of med, things we so much improved, I was kicking myself for not going earlier! It's definitely worth looking into and having a chat with your doc.  Silent reflux babies tend to be chubby because they don't spit up, but they nurse a lot to soothe the acid.