1-year-old & feeling pretty done...

[Maia&Lia]

Hi guys,
I'm coming here for some support...

My youngest just turned 1 and while I fully expected to continue breastfeeding well into her 2nd year, I'm beginning to feel done with it all. She has always been a difficult nurser. She is often distracted and subsequently takes poor feeds throughout the day. Then, at night, she wakes at all different hours to catch up on calories. I never know what I'm going to get from one day to the next and it is getting frustrating. She always eats two good meals a day (lunch and dinner), but breakfast only happens if she is having something extra yummy.

In any case, I'm thinking of weaning a feed or so in order to give myself a little break. But, I'm not sure how to do it. Right now her routine looks a little like this:

Wakes (anywhere between 6:00 and 6:30 am, except on nights when she sleeps through & wakes for nursing at 5:15...those mornings she'll usually not go back to sleep and is up from 5:15 on.)
Nurses 6:30
Breakfast 7:00
Nap 9-10
Nurses 10:30
Lunch 12:00
Nap 2-3:30
Nurses 3:30
Snack (sometimes) around 4:30
Dinner 6:00
Nurses 7:00

Total times that she nurses in one day is usually 5 since she infrequently goes through the night. The time she wakes in the middle of the night can vary considerably (sometimes midnight and others around 4:30).

Anyway, we're slowly transitioning to 1 nap/day (she has been fighting her naps daily) and I'm not sure how the transition with breastfeeding should change too.

Any support or advice is greatly appreciated as I'm feeling so discouraged that nursing isn't as "romantic" as it was with my first AND that we're still not sleeping through the night (presumably because we're not nursing as much as is needed during the day).

Thanks again!

[First Time Mom]

I would probably look at eliminating the 3:30 bf, instead offering a good snack. This way she will be on 3 bf "meals" during the day. Can she hold out for her first bf in the morning until 7am? This would help you push the second bf and meals, which could help for when she's on 1 nap. When my dd first switched to 1 nap she was napping from 11-1, then she pushed it later and later, now at 2 years she naps 12:30-2:30. Eventually, when you eliminate another feed after that it should be the lunch bf, so that you are bfing 2x- morning and evening. If you do cut back on a feed it will be important to make sure it's substituted with a decent calorie snack, otherwise it could worsen the nws.

Also, you mention that she's not so interested in breakfast, it could be that she's not as hungry since her bf is 30 minutes earlier, offering the solids later than the 30 minutes may help her take more.

Have you started her on whole milk yet? That could help with getting extra calories into her during the day and may help with the nws.

[Maia&Lia]

Marian,
Thank you for your response. We had another rough night last night (in bed by 7:15, woke at 11:30 and again at 3:30). I feel like I've got a newborn in my house again and it is so frustrating.

In any case, I've seemed to have forgotten all that took place with my older daughter in the transition from 2 to 1 nap and cutting breast feeds so you're helping me to think about those things again. I do know that we'll eventually need to move lunch, but for the time being I'm happy to have it the way it is because I can feed both girls at the same time. If I don't do it like that, I'm afraid that I'd be stuck at the dining room table ALL DAY LONG between breakfasts at different times, lunches at different times, snacks at different times. *sigh* I'm going to take a look at her routine and see where it can be tweaked.

Again, thanks for your response. You've reminded me of many important things...
Have a great day!

[Wink's Marmy]

Hey Alessia - fancy seeing you here! 

I am "here for you"!! I JUST dropped Wink's 11am feed - I have been giving her cow's milk mixed with drinkable yogurt... If you don't remember - she has been a difficult nurser as well... Anyway, I'm sorry for all the NW's. I know its tough thinking that you may not nurse her for as long as you planned to, but you have to take care of your needs too (sleep!, sanity!). Anyway, I hope it goes smoothly. I like the advice of the mod... I am going to follow this thread to see if anyone else has suggestions.

Hugs & kisses! 

[Erin (redstarfalling)]

Hi there ladies!  (Happy birthday Lia!!)

Samantha's now getting cow's milk for her afternoon "snack" during the week when she's at daycare (I just can't pump enough anymore...).  So I still give her BM after her am nap as her snack, but I've also started adding solids right after - just a bit - either a few cheerios or a bit of fruit, and more of this after her pm nap (yogurt and/or fruit usually).  If she's wakened and nursed very early that day (like at 5:15 or 5:30 - they should be roommates! ) then I'll give a bit more solids with her milk at snack time or a bit more breakfast than usual.

As for the nightwakings, I personally find that when Sam wakes really early in the morning, and has more NW's, it helps to put her to bed a bit earlier the next night (sometimes even at 6:30) - remember than when you're dropping a nap, you often have to move the bedtime up a bit.

Good luck!