Stepping in too early? disturbing self settling?

[Wriggly]

Hi there,

Just wanted some feedback on our situation to see if others might have experienced this. My LO is 19 weeks old tomorrow, textbook baby with lots of spirit, on 4 hour EASY for 2 weeks now, went pretty much cold turkey to 4hour from 3 hour as wasn't hungry at 3/3.5 hours and staying up longer. Routine re timings pretty much textbook on feeds:

0700
1045/1100
1445/1500
but dinner is at 1815/1830 (can't seem to last at dinner time yet), bed by 1930
DF at 2230ish

Since moving to 4hour EASY we've been having more 'A' time before feeds, anything up to 45mins, which presume is ok as he stays up for a good bit after the feed. Last week his naps have been getting shorter, not quite 45 mins, more like 1 hour (seems to go past 45min mark ok), but by last nap, often wakes at 30mins.

Today, everything pear shaped, 1hour only this morning, 1hour 25 mins second nap, and went down at 1610 for last nap, woke after 35 mins - I went up and watched him, he cried out a lot, but I didn't think it was the 'pick me up cry' so I left him, he cried out a lot for a good 10mins (felt like forever!) then started to self settle, cries got further apart, started sucking fingers, then started dropping off again, after several jolts, back to sleep - whole process took 30minutes.

So I'm wondering, I have been trying to extend some of his naps with Shh pat and PU/PD - perhaps I was stepping in too early and he is now just making a very noisy transition at the 45 minute mark? has anyone else come across this? I found it very hard not to step in this evening and shh him, thought I might be letting him CIO, but it just didn't seem like the right kind of cry for that, and then he resettled himself fine (should mention he usually goes down easily for naps and at bedtime without my intervention).

Would really appreciate any feedback from anyone who might have had this too with their little one (i.e. very noisy transitions through sleep phases) - also, could this be an indiciation that he's OT or overstimulated?

Thanks

Wriggly

[jess, lukeys_mom]

I would say trust your instincts! If the cries sounded like he was resettling and you would have blown it by going in there then IMO it sounds like you were doing the right thing.
My ds does this too, he makes a lot of noise when resettling so I've had to really train my ears. Sometimes he will really yell and right when I'm about to go in there there is silence, and when I check he is sleeping like nothing happened

[Wriggly]

lukeys_mom,

Thanks! Good to know he's not the only one, think I've been learning two of the many hard lessons of first time parents - not to rush in too soon and to trust your instincts! It's very reassuring to know other babies make that much noise too when settling, he did it again just now when going down for a nap and is now sleeping happy as larry

Wriggly

[Melej]

Hi Wriggly

My LO does the same but it has taken me a while to identify the cries for when shes resettling and when shes ready to get up. You can generally guarantee that she has a little cry around the 45 min mark of naps but will resettle herself. Over the last week she has been STTN. Sometimes she has had a little cry at around 5.30/6.00 but now I can hear that it sounds really sleepy and usually only lasts for a couple of mins, before she drifts off again.

I think to start with I was stepping in too early and then waking her more rather than letting her sort herself out but sometimes I feel its all about trial and error before you find what works!!!

HTH

[jess, lukeys_mom]

on that note too - though it's a bit of a way's away for you wriggly - i found that identifying the cries became a little easier when ds was more mobile and could at least sit on his own. when i peek in there and he is still rolling around then i know he is trying to get himself settled, if he's sitting at the corner of his bed looking out then i know he wants out!

i think you're right wriggly, it is a really good lesson parenting teaches us about listening to our instincts. i think that as a mom it is truly the only way to relax!

jess x

[Wriggly]

Thanks guys for your help,

Just thought I'd let you know, I've been really strict with myself today and yesterday, and hey presto, what I thought were 'nap problems', i.e. my lo waking and crying out at 45mins/30mins etc, was just me doing AP. Have left him at it all yesterday and today, he does his little crying thing (empty crying out, not roaring to be picked up) and then settles himself, is very happy when he wakes, and all his naps are now 1.5hours or more! Hooray - just hope the neighbours don't think I'm strangling him!

Thanks again

[jess, lukeys_mom]

I'm really glad to hear that 

Incidentally last night I was up all night (bad flu, fever at 2 am and couldn't get back, that's another story!) so I heard all of ds's noises. He let out a big wail at about 2.30 (that was it), then again a little empty crying around 4, then at 5.45. Normally I sleep thru most of that but was just chuckling to myself that he still makes such noisy transitions...and wondering what he dreams about 

[Purplecattypants]

Same here too! Life is a lot easier when you figure it out and leave them to self settle