Author Topic: Help!  (Read 1010 times)

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Offline parmar1

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Help!
« on: December 11, 2008, 13:41:55 pm »
Hi
I hope someone can help. I'm new to this site and to the EASY routine, which I am trying to follow. Currently my DD is on a 3 hourly feed routine. She is 13 weeks and was 5 weeks premature...
I am having a nitemare with naps, which range from 30 mins to an hour and she'll only have a 2 hour nap if I hold her.
I am mixed feeding, as cannot cope with breastfeeding and sorting out her naps etc, its driving me insane...If she doesnt sleep well during the day, she will then go onto to have a night terror and they break my heart...I'm at the end of my thether! I have tried sshh/pat and w2s trying to extend naps, but to no affect, unless I hold her...I spend most of my day by her moses basket sshhing and patting, then bring her downstairs for a little activity and then up we go again as soon as she is tired. I'm getting better at reading her tired cues, even before the 1st yawn we are upstairs, I'll change her nappy, sing her a few nursery rhymes whilst she is on my lap and as soon as she gets drowsy which is within 5-10 mins, I put her in her moses basket, sometimes half awake, sometimes asleep...And as she doesnt sleep long enough unitl her next feed, more often than not her feed times then coincide with her sleep times, so the EASY messes up..and I hate feeding her and then putting her to sleep...

Here is a typical day:

7am - Feed (BF)
8.30 - S
9.30 - awake
10 - Feed (Bottle 3/4 oz)
11 - S
11.45 - Awake
12.15 - try to put asleep - not always successful
1 - Feed (Bottle 3/4oz) and then falls asleep...!
2 - Awake
3 - try to put asleep again - sometimes works in the afternoon for around 45/60 mins
4 - Feed (Bottle 3/4oz)
5.30 - catnap
6.15 start bath/massage routine
6.30 - BF (sometimes bottle)
7 - Asleep
11pm/12pm - DF
3am/4am - BF


Following the bedtime routine, she drifts off to sleep very quickly, prob because she hasnt slept much during the day and on sometimes gets up between 3am and 6am...
She has a dummy or otherwise I'd be the dummy! Once I can fix the nap probs, I'm going to wean her off the dummy..

Any suggestions, I dont know what else to do

Thanx

Ash

Offline clare33

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Re: Help!
« Reply #1 on: December 11, 2008, 14:50:28 pm »
Hi there,

I'm no expert and I'm sure you will get some good advise on here, but have you tried to increase the A time?
I rememeber a few issues at this age with short naps and I increased the A time slowly over a few days. I would try to add 10-15 mins of A time and see how she goes. Don't add too much to quickly so you can keep an eye on her tired queues. Then try and increase the A time over a few days/week.

hugs to you

Offline parmar1

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Re: Help!
« Reply #2 on: December 11, 2008, 15:39:30 pm »
Thanx for replying...currently she can go up to 1.5 hours, so from Sat if I extend this to say 1.40 mins, and see what happens...she gets cranky and yawns after 1.5, but I'll try and distract her if poss with more singing...
Did your LO get through the short nap stage...I keep thinking I'll be doing this until she no longer needs naps!!
I do hope someone can help and maybe even tweak my routine abit

x

Offline deckchariot

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Re: Help!
« Reply #3 on: December 11, 2008, 20:09:52 pm »
I'm actually wondering if the A time is too long.  Since she was 5 weeks premature, her adjusted age is closer to 8 weeks, and at that age, most lo's are doing an hour of A time.  Although, it looks like her first nap is 1 hr, is that right?  Generally a 30 min nap would indicate OT, and a 45 min nap would indicate UT, but that's not always the case. 

It's really normal to have napping issues at this age - babies often figure out nighttime sleep first (0-3 mos) and daytime sleep later (3-6 mos), so some of it is developmental.  But you can help her learn how to fall asleep and stay asleep.  Having a winddown is crucial, so good for you on doing that!  I would do pat/shh, even if it doesn't seem to be working - it is not a quick fix and does take time to take affect.  When sleep training your bub, consistency is key - if sometimes you do pat/shh, sometimes you do w2s, sometimes you rock to sleep, it will be much harder for her to figure out how to go to sleep.

Often, the first A time of the day is the shortest for bubs, so if she's up by 7, I'd aim to have her in bed by 8.  If her first nap is short, then you want to shorten her next A time considerably - basically just up, feed, and back to the wind down.  Yes, it is exhausting.  But it does work, and you won't be doing it forever.  Here's a link that hopefully will encourage you:  http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=106837.0

hang in there!!

hth
michelle
Michelle




ernurse05

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Re: Help!
« Reply #4 on: December 12, 2008, 14:23:00 pm »
I just want to throw in some hugs to you parmar1 and say I was in the same boat!  My LO is 14 weeks and was a preemie, too.  We went through the SAME thing once she hit two months and everyone kept saying to increase her A time. By the time I figured out what was going on she was almost 11 weeks and was in an OT cycle!  Since she was a preemie, use the adjusted age for A time.  My LO is now 13 weeks and can still only handle about 1hr10min of A time. We would get 45 min naps and people kept saying to increase her A time that she's almost 4 months and should be on her way to a 4hr EASY.  But she was actually OT!  I had to put her down after about 45-50 min A time for a few days to get her out of OT.  I kept with the shh/pat for a while but since Hannah is a touchy baby that sometimes made it worse.  Find what works for your LO (pressure, shh/pat, rubbing her head, etc.) and do that consistently for a while.  Hope that helps!  And good luck!  You're doing great.  And just keep in mind, as soon as you get the naps straightened out, keep an eye open for the short naps to pop back...I've found that I need to SLOWLY increase DD's A time about every 4 weeks!

Offline deckchariot

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Re: Help!
« Reply #5 on: December 12, 2008, 20:05:15 pm »
that's fabulous advice ernurse05 - thanks for sharing!!
Michelle




ernurse05

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Re: Help!
« Reply #6 on: December 13, 2008, 00:07:34 am »
maybe you shouldn't take my advice since I'm struggling once again with short naps!  Oh, nap fairy where are you?!?!?! ???

Offline parmar1

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Re: Help!
« Reply #7 on: December 13, 2008, 18:52:01 pm »
oh dear, the nap monster is back again for you....well the other day i was really surprised...LO slept for 1.5 hours for her first nap with an activity time of 1.20mins...I actually wanted to go to my mums and expected to leave within 45 mins, obviously thinking that lo would sleep max 45 mins as usual...so anyway, there i was waiting for her to get up...they can certainly surprise you when you least expect it huh...
How you getting on?

x

ernurse05

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Re: Help!
« Reply #8 on: December 13, 2008, 19:30:09 pm »
getting on with little sleep!!!  Started to take a look at the post by Deb about how Tracy helped Josie and her family with 45 min naps...sounds a lot like Hannah.  Started working with that a little today but she had no interest in taking another feed during WD...I woke her up (had extended her previous nap) at 12:15 did the whole feed, activity, etc.  She yawned at 12:45, we were up in her room by 1 trying to do some quiet activity and do a small feed that she wanted nothing to do with!  She started to nod off so I put her in her crib about 1:15 and she was kinda fussing so I stayed with her, she settled down and I left her room about 1:30 even though she was still awake...I'm guessing she fell asleep about 1:40 but she did it by herself!!  I was in her room putting away her laundry when she started to stir at 2 so I just held her joints, she didn't wake!  Did it again at 2:20...so small success I guess!  All in all I guess when I look back her A time in total was about 1.5 hrs...it's just she gives me yawns so early!!!  So, baby steps I guess...still waiting for some help, though!  How are things going for you?!  I had that happen once when I planned a 45 min nap and she slept for 2 hrs!!!  Very thankful for it but it drives me nuts when I can't make plans!!

Offline deckchariot

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Re: Help!
« Reply #9 on: December 15, 2008, 01:35:46 am »
YAY for a good nap!!!  Celebrate whenever you can!!!  Those are the naps that get you through the poor nap days!

ernurse05 - excellent job with nap extension!!!  I did the same thing with Abby, and it did work - I did it for 2 weeks, and only had success maybe 1/2 the time - but that was enough to help her figure out how to get past the transition hump.  Well done!
Michelle




Offline parmar1

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Re: Help!
« Reply #10 on: December 16, 2008, 14:17:46 pm »
I'm going to have to take a look at that post again (where Tracy helped Josie)...I'm still having a nightmare, although there have been days that she is sleeping for 60 mins, so there is some progress...

Offline clare33

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Re: Help!
« Reply #11 on: December 17, 2008, 10:49:10 am »
Hi, hows it going? I haven't logged on since i posted to your question.

When my LO was around this age and I had nap problems I would write everything down, times of feeds, naps, how long to settle, was there anything wrong etc and build up a picture over a week or so to see if there are any adjustments to make. Every baby is different and there will be no one answer to this - i read loads and loads of posts on here and took bits of info from some and tried things out before I got thru the issue. Its a hard time for us mummy's and it can be fvery rustrating at times, but you sound like you're doing a great job and you will work it out.

I totally agree with deckchariot about the consistancy of the sleep routine. I used shh/pat a lot and even now at 18 months it helps if he's upset or poorly. If i was out and about I would still use shh/pat but i sometimes held him until his eyes were rolling then lie him down before he went to sleep.
 
Something I also did - rightly or wrongly was feed my LO in his sleep during the daytime. If he was due a feed when he was asleep and i knew he would wake hungry, which as you know can then affect the pattern for the rest of the day, I would just feed him while he was asleep - he'd have a full belly and continue to sleep - this helped me loads.

Well i hope you find the answer you're looking for.