Routine help for 16 week old, help!

[atissin]

I am finding it difficult getting my 16 week old into a routine.  She is breast fed/bottle fed (breast milk) every 2.5 to 3 hours but not at set times in the day, she will have on average 3oz sometimes 4 or 5oz.  Sometimes wakes once in the night sometimes 4, 5 times - always different.  Have just managed to get her down for 8.30pm which has taken an hour.  She does not sleep during the day unless we are out.  I have a 3.5 year old so am back and forth to pre-school and other entertainment.  Baby also finds it very hard to settle with anybody else, including Daddy.  I would appreciate any help/advice/miracles.  One other thing she has not been 100% as she has a cold but don't think this is the main cause of problem.  Look forward to hearing from anyone! x

[Evgenia]

Hi atissin welcome!
Its great u want to get ur lo on a routine. SInce ur lo has a cold I would leave any routine changes untill she's feeling better, otherwise I could be too much for her to handle.
Can U post ur current routine in the following format:
E what time
A for how long
S what time and for how long
this will help the ladies here to get a better picture of whats going on and they will be able to give u advise.
At around 4 months los on average r ready to be moved onto 4 hour feeding routine, u could concentrate on establishing a good routine with 3 -3.5 hour feeds and then gradually move onto 4 hour. Ur other option is to implement a plan Tracy devised for introducing EASY at 4 month r older in her book 'Baby Whisperer Solves all Your Problems'.
Could u give a bit more info in regards to ur los sleep, ie. how does she settle, what u do r use to get her to sleep, do u have a wind own routine? Do u do a dream feed?

[atissin]

Hi thanks for your quick response... routine so far has been breast/bottle every 2.5/3 hours and only time she will sleep is when out in car seat or pram.  Bedtime routine was bath, feed and then bed.  Most of the time she would fall asleep during feed and then I'd put her down.  When she didn't have cold she would wake once maybe twice a night for feeds.  I tried dream feed a couple of times but didn't seem to stop her waking for feed in night as usual.  I find it difficult getting into routine as 3.5 year old is at pre school from 12.30 to 3 so if she is fed at 1 she would then need sleep by 2.30 which is fine but I'm then on way to school for pick up so the sleep is in car seat and she is sent off because of being in the car not because she has got herself off to sleep?  I did try easy routine today but can't seem to get her to sleep.  She was awake last night for 2 hours because of coughing and being bunged up so it stops her getting back to sleep.  Usually when she wakes in the night I feed her and she goes straight back off.  Hope this doesn't all sound too confusing?  Anyway I've made a note of what routine I've done today, I've tried to follow easy for the first time.. please note last night we were up from 2.30 till 4.30am coughing and blocked nose...
Awake at 6.50am
E 7am - 4oz
A 7.30 - 9
S - couldn't get her to sleep
E 10am - 3oz
A 10.30 - 11.45
S 11.45 - 12.45 woke twice during this time and she was in car seat.
E 1pm - 4oz
A 1.30 - 2.30
S 2.45 - 4.45 again in car seat and on travels to pre school, I left her to sleep past 4 because she hadn't had much other sleep today.  Didn't chance moving her from car seat to cot incase she woke up.
E 4.45

Now I'm planning on feeding her again at 6.15 then giving her bath etc and another feed at 7.45 then hopefully to bed.  Can you suggest any wind down techniques?  I've tried quiet time in her room and mobile on with gentle music and cuddles but only thing I find that works is feeding her till she falls asleep?!

[charmie]

Is it the 1st day you're trying to follow EASY?  It might take some time for your lo to learn to do things in a different way.  It takes persistence and consistence, but in the end it will all pay off.

First of all you need to stick to a wake up time.  If you choose 7 and she wakes up at 6.50 it's still ok.  I think she is probably ready to feed every 3.5hrs.  How do you decide when to put her down for a nap?  Does she show you she's tired? Here's a wind down routine you can adopt;  http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=64277.0

I suggest you stop feeding to sleep since it is becoming (or it already is) a prop.  That is exactly why the E and the S in EASY are separated by the A.  So that baby doesn't learn to associate feeding with sleeping.  Otherwise everytime baby wakes up she will expect to be fed to go back to sleep, even if not hungry.

Here's another link;  http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=69369.0


xxx
charm



xxx
charm

[Evgenia]

PP gave u some great advice.
Just wanted to add that it could take los longer than a week to get used to DF, and Tracy believed that DF is essential for los under the age of 7 months as it susstains then through the night. It did wonders for my dd once we had it well established, and on many occasions when she did wake up at night it gave me confidence that she wasn't acctually hungry so I could use other techniques to get her back to sleep.
Heres a link with some info on it:
http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=54662.0

Have u tried shh/pat or pu/pd to get ur lo to sleep or to extend her naps?

[atissin]

I've just put her to bed and left her for a good 20 mins to try to get off to sleep on her own, when she started getting upset I shh and patted her and it worked for a while and then she started getting very upset so I gave in and fed her for a couple of mins and she then went off.  I will have to try your advice tomorrow night I now understand the A between E and S and it is a good point to remember.  Thanks for the links and the advice, I will take a look at them now and let you know how I get on x

[Evgenia]

Does she use a soother? Have u tried giving it to her instead of feeding when she cant't fall asleep? I personnaly think soother as a prop is not as bad as feeding to sleep as the lo is still learning to fall asleep by herself, though others may disagree.

 When u r trying to change ur los habbits (like being fed to sleep) she will get upset and her crying is her way of telling u that she is confused and doesn't know whats going on. By giving in and feeding her u make her and urself go through all that stress for nothing. From personnal experience I know how hard it is to listen to ur lo cry, and I learned the hard way that if u r consisten u will have to put up with this stress for significantly shorter time. 

Keep us posted!

[atissin]

I've tried dummy but she isn't interested - wish she would take one!  I've been reading the links and I now feel like I have more tricks up my sleeve to try when getting her to sleep. I'm determind to make this work now!  I will keep you posted many thanks again x

[Mum of 3 + 2 stepkids]

Hello luv glad you have done this Im sure now you have all the info that by this time next week you will be kicking yourself why you didn't do this before

Im keeping my beady eye on you lol xxx Stay Strong!!! 

BF
Kate x

[charmie]

Good luck and keep us posted.  Come here for support and advice anytime 


xxx
charm