3year won't nap but can't last until bedtime. HELP...

[arial]

My DS is losing his last nap.  We try to put him down for nap around 12:30P to 1 PM and he will not go down for a nap.We have attempted to put him down for a nap even later in the day, but even then, he will not go.  The only way we can get him to nap, even 30 minutes, is if we take him for a car ride. In the afternoons, he is grouchy boy since has not slept - no to mention overtired spirited toddler who misbehaves a lot because of lack of sleep.  Please help, any suggestions to get at least a 30 minutes nap so that he can last until bedtime.

[Colin Macs Mom]

I'm sorry you don't have any responses yet

Have you checked out this thread?
http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=150279.0

It's such a hard phase!

[becky1969]

What time does he wake up? Go to bed? And how well does he sleep at night?

[arial]

Last night he went to bed at 11PM, which is very late for him.  Most of the time, he is asleep by 10PM.  He usually wakes up between 6:30Am and 7Am.  He sleeps fairly good, but at times, wakes up looking for us - we have been sleeping in his room, no same bed, since my daughter was born.

Today, he is horribly cranky and tired.  I really need help.  His nap time are a battle.  He is spirited and overtired by them and it is a total struggle of hours - usually passes out at 3PM after fighting with us about not wanting to nap.

thanks

[becky1969]

Bedtime is waaaaay too late without a nap.  You should probably aim for a 12 hour day.  So if he gets up at 6:30 or 7, he should go to bed at 6:30/7.  That will probably extend as he's more used to going without a nap.

that 3 pm nap is what's pushing your bedtime later for sure.  I'd try the 12 hour day thing and see how he does with that.  I think if you move bedtime 3-4 hours earlier you'll be better off.

[Hadley12]

(((HUGS)))! Dropping the last nap can be really rough. It was (sometimes still is!!) a nightmare for us. I too have a spirited 3.5 yo who has mostly dropped her last nap and we've had to aim for a 12-13 hour day to keep away OT. She's up by 6:30 most days so she's in bed by 6:30 and asleep by 7:00 those days as well. It's no fun to put them to bed so early in the summer but it's a must for us, otherwise EWs start and she's up at 5:00am. If she wakes early for some reason then I will force a nap by bribing her with the "nap fairy" who brings her a small present after she wakes up. I agree with Becky that 10pm is really hard on kids this little. I would guess he's way OT. Even with 11-12 hour nights for DD1 she's a mess in the late afternoon. I would cut the 3 pm nap and have him in bed by 6:30. I know that might be rough since you share a room but I think it's worth it. Good luck and keep us posted.

[arial]

THanks so much for the help.  We have already tried to moved his bedtime to earlier time with no avail.  He is actually at bed at least since 9PM, some times earlier and still falls asleep almost at 10PM.  His nap time is also no our choice.  Most of the time, we put him for a nap around 1PM, but he then tries to get up out of bed, sings, has to go potty and any other activity that he thinks will prevent him to fall asleep.  Most of the time, we have to put him in time out  before he lay quietly and fall asleep.  We are exhausted by the time he falls asleep since it takes 2 hours of struggle before he fall asleep.  Any suggestion as to how can we get him to sleep faster so that he does not get overtired?  THANKS   

[Katet]

My youngest started giving up his nap around 2y9mo & at that stage he actually needed to be well on the way to bed 11hours from when he woke... a 3yo needs pretty much spot on 12hours awake & 12 hours sleep & normally that is say 11 overnight & 1 hour nap (textbook case) but we found with DS1 that it was more like 12.5-13 hours overnight sleep to balance it when he didn't nap. (he'd actually only do about 10hours overnight & 1.5hours nap though)
I'm wondering (as it was the case with my DS2) that he actually isn't napping because he is overtired, if he is normally going to bed around 9, but not sleeping until 10 even with a nap, that is really low sleep needs. will he fall asleep if he is in the car at say 11am?, if that is the case then I think partly it may be he is actually way overtired & so too wired to fall asleep, rather than actually not needing the sleep.
Personally if he doesn't nap, I'd be aiming for bedtime to be about 11.5/12hours Maximum from when he woke in the am... it is hard on life when they start needing that early bedtime, but heaps better than a ratty child.

[Hadley12]

Arial - we dropped naps for the same reason...the battle was just so stressful that I gave up. She ended up in time out a lot too because of yelling in her bed etc. I agree with Katet...I think he is way OT and thus fighting sleep. I would keep him up all day and have him in bed by 6:00 with hope for sleep by 6:30. Putting him down at 9pm and him not sleeping until 10pm I think is just a result of being too wired to sleep. I find with dd that she'll fall asleep as early as 6pm if given the opportunity.

[becky1969]

Agree with PP -- even 9 pm is WAY too late, hence the fighting sleep for an hour or more.


try 6 pm and see!  I think you'll be AMAZED at the difference!