Help! 5.5 month old waking 1-2 times a night, not from hunger

[lilyo]

I am totally desperate! My DS is almost 6 months old and is still not STTN. I posted a month or so ago regarding his night waking problems (he was waking between 4 and 6 and I was breastfeeding him) and received some really good advice. Since then, it has become clear that he does not need to be fed in the middle of the night despite his night wakings. I now only feed him in the middle of the night if it is an emergency (i.e. he has been up crying from gas or something I can't figure out for an hour or more) and I am desperate to soothe him. However, most nights he gets a dream feed (about 4-4.5oz) between 10:30 and 11 PM and then doesn't eat again until 8AM. This has been working consistently for a few weeks now. When he wakes in the morning (usually between 7:30 and , he isn't starving and cooperates while I change his diaper before he eats so I know that the night wakings are NOT due to hunger.

DS is still swaddled, I am desperate to wean the swaddle since it seems to be contributing to his night wakings - I have a video monitor so I can see that when he wakes (usually between 4 and 5 AM), he is unswaddled. If he is still swaddled, he is more likely to be able to settle himself back down within 10 mins without me having to go in there. So, I feel that the nightwakings are partially due to the swaddle (its a double edged sword). He still needs to be swaddled because he can't fall asleep on his own without it, or fall back asleep on his own when he's busted out. But at the same time, he is often trying to bust out and when he finally does, he wakes himself up. Also, I find that I've had to hold him longer before putting him down to prevent him from trying to break out of the swaddle as soon as I put him in the crib... I also think gas is to blame for his nightwakings but only some of the time. His cry is often high pitched and he pulls his legs to his chest etc. I give him gas drops when necessary and massage his tummy every time I change his diaper but he still gets gassy...

When I go to him and he has gas, I feel I have to comfort him and rock him to settle him down. I may be wrong but I don't think its one of those situations where you can use PU/PD... I'm just sick of getting up with him every night (almost) for approximately an hour when I know he doesn't need to be fed. I'm feeling the pressure to let him cry for 20-30 mins at night because his problem just seems to be that he can't put himself back to sleep and his cry is closer to his mantra cry than an "I need you mommy" cry, but honestly, it is hard to tell in the middle of the night...

Does anyone have any advice for me? I thought that once he could go 9 hours between feeds, the nightwakings would be over but they aren't!!!! How do I deal with frequent, regular nightwakings that have nothing to do with hunger? How do I wean the swaddle when it both helps and hinders his sleep? I put him to sleep usually on his side, swaddled, but the past few nights he has rolled over onto his tummy while still swaddled which I know is dangerous... In general, he's okay at putting himself to sleep, I put him down drowsy but awake for naps and bedtime 60-70% of the time, other times his eyes have already closed but he's not dead asleep... But if I want to put him down partially unswaddled, I have to put him down almost 100% asleep. So I'm torn - should he master falling asleep on his own 90% of the time while still swaddled before I wean the swaddle? Or should I wean the swaddle and once he is more used to that, help him learn to fall asleep on his own unswaddled?

Our days are pretty regular:

7:45 Wake Up
8:00 EAT
8:30 ACTIVITY
9:45/10 SLEEP - usually 1.5-2 hours, in stroller on a nice day, in crib as weather gets colder. This is his most consistent and easiest nap
11:45/12:00 EAT
12:20 ACTIVITY
2:00 SLEEP - this nap is sometimes a bit of a battle, it was getting really short (like less than 45 mins) so I tried extending A time to a full 2 hours before wind down. Naps are now between 1-1.5 hours here, usually closer to 1.5 hours.
3:45/4:00 EAT
4:20 ACTIVITY
5:45 SLEEP - this nap (if he takes it at all) lasts from 35 mins to about an hour.
6:30 ACTIVITY/BATH followed by massage
7/7:30 EAT
8:00 SLEEP
10:30/11 DREAM FEED

No signs of teething (I've pressed on his gums but no reaction), he isn't rolling over on his own (only from his side, not back to front and vice versa)... I just don't know how to approach this. He is almost 6 months old and I can count the number of times he's slept through the night on two hands...

[Nauvoo]

We had the same issue with the swaddle at around 5 months.  There were many a night wakings where I would reswaddle and that's all that was needed.  We considered weaning the swaddle and tried but things were even worse and eventually we got creative and had to develop a different swaddling technique to keep dd swaddled all night.  We were so proud of our creativeness!! At around 7 1/2 months this no longer worked so we weaned cold turkey and have had no problems whatsoever.  
Maybe if weaning the swaddle isn't an option you could look into different techniques that will keep your lo swaddled.  I know this is all dd needed to STTN and she did it wonderfully when the swaddle worked.  Sometimes when she'd wake early she'd lay in her crib all happy and babbling and still swaddled for up to 45mins.  Crazy to me but she loved it.
Good luck and I hope you can reach a solution.

[*Jo*]

Hi there, we had the same issues at this age as well, we weaned from the swaddle using a sleep sack that i made that had the hands still covered, this worked brilliantly for about two months when we felt he was ready to just have nothign but a cuddly (blanket)

have you tried the miracle blanket? thats another thing we used for a long time

here is a picture of what i made so you get the idea

[*Jo*]

also at this age your LO should be aiming for 2.5 hours, this will otherwise cause wakeups in the night as he will be trying to get the A time he would normally get during the day, at night. i would start increasing his A in 15 min lots, increase it every two to three days so that you dont end up with an OT baby, this will help your naps and NW

[lilyo]

Thank you for the responses! A question for Calebsmummy - did your LO also use a paci? The main problem with weaning the swaddle is that he takes the paci out and plays with it then likely doesn't get it back in his mouth. On the one hand, I want to keep his hands free to encourage him to suck on his fingers so he isn't competely paci dependent but on the other hand, I love your make shift sleep sack with the hands covered as I think it may prevent him from taking his paci out. How did that work for you?

[*Jo*]

we did have a paci but only for a short time before we weaned him and he was still in a swaddle at the time. I found that for Caleb the hands being covered helped him to feel like he was still snug and secure, like in a swaddle, but allowed him the freedom of being able to suck his hand for comfort, and get used to not having them strapped to his side. also his hands didnt get cold which i think after months of swaddling it would feel weird to have cold hands all of a sudden.