Help - 1 year old what has happened?

[Vally]

Hi

I am really hoping someone can shed some light for me. My DS has recently turned 1 and since 4 months has slept a solid 12 hours at night very consistantly, so we have been very lucky.

This last two weeks have been really difficult. He will not settle in his cot on his own (which he previously used to) and we are having to stay with him until he is asleep. The last night was awful as he was awake all night crying, hw would be standing or sitting in his cot so would be laying him back down constantly. In total he probably slept for about 3 hours!!

He is suffering with a bad cough which I am getting checked out today by the doctor and also seems to be pulling his ears.

Do you think this is because he is poorly or is this seperation anxiety? If it is seperation anxiety I have tried all the tips and he still won't settle on his own.

Help

Very tired Vally

[samsmam]

My guess would be that its a bit of both!  He is obviously feeling poorly with the cough (and potential sore ear) and as a result is being more clingy and needy than he has been to date.  I have a 21 month old and normally everything is great but when he is sick or in pain he does get very clingy and needs lots of TLC, kisses and cuddles - and that's fine, I'm his mum and I'm here to comfort him when he needs me. 

I think you are doing the right thing in getting him checked over by a doc.  I'm sure the doc will be able to give you something for him or suggest some pain meds.  It's hard for you as it feels like you're going backwards, but IMO this sounds just like neediness due to illness and I would expect that things should return to normal once he recovers.  In the meantime, just be on hand with the TLC and the kisses and cuddles and I'm sure things will right themselves in a day or two when he is feeling better.

Let us know how things pan out once he's recovered.  Wishing him a speedy recovery.

Fiona

[londonmama]

Sounds like an ear infection?  Hopefully the doc will check ears specifically.  Ear infections often accompany coughs/colds for us.  From having them myself, I know the pain can be excrutiating! 

Could also be that he is starting to get his molars?  My DS often rubs his ears when his teeth are hurting.

While you are waiting to see the doctor, you could try some pain medication to see if it helps?  We found ibuprofen helped with ear infections more than paracetamol/Tylenol.

[babybarr]

Good luck at the drs.  It does sound like something is amiss. Let us know how you get on and if your LO gets a full bill of health maybe you can post your routine here for us to have a look at.

Big hugs.
Laura x

[Vally]

Ok

So I went to the doctor and he said his chest and ears were clear which is good. He said that he just has a bad cold and that one of his bottom molars is coming through.

His nights have been better in that he is not waking as much however he is still not happy when being put to bed and he just does not like being left on his own. When he is put in his cot if you walk away he cries and after a few minutes he will just stand up and scream. I go back in lay him back down and as long as he can see me he is happy lying there. As soon as I leave the same happens. Some people have said that by keep going back in he will just keep doing this and that I should leave him. I am not comfortable leaving him to cry especially when he is standing up in case he falls. Will this be a hard habit to break? I am not sure what I should do. I am hoping that by keep reassuring him he will soon settle as he always used to.

His routine is roughly this.

wakes at 7ish
E 7.30am 9oz bottle cows milk followed by toast or porridge
A play time
S some times he sleeps at 9am sometime for 1/2 hour sometimes up to 1.5 hours

E Snacl and water around 10am
A play time
E Lunch at 12
A Playtime
S Aroun 1ish depending in morning nap

E 6oz milk
A playtime
E Teas at 4.30pm
A bathtime at 5.30pm
E 9oz bottle at 6.30pm
S bed at 7pm although the last week or so he does not end up actually settling and going to sleep until sometimes 8pm.

[katie80]

I would say that if he has previously been a good independent sleeper, you will not 'ruin' it by staying with him while he is not feeling well, especially if you are just standing by his crib.  When my DD is sick or teething bad, we usually rock with her until she is calm again and then put her back into bed.  And a few times she has needed to be rocked all the way back to sleep.  This has never hindered her ability to settle on her own again when she is feeling better.  She just goes right back to independent sleep.  I do know that some people do WIWO after their LOs are feeling better to get back to independent sleep, so if it is a problem after he's better, you can always do that too.  If he is not feeling well, I would definitely not leave him to cry!

[Vally]

Thanks

That is reassuring. I will continue standing by his cot and if he is still doing this when better I will do WI WO.

[babybarr]

Hi
You may want to have a look at some of the threads about the 2-1 transition and think about shortening the first nap to allow for a longer 2nd one at a slightly earlier time.

What time does he usually wake from the 2nd nap?  If he doesn't nap long at that nap it's a long time till bed.

What about something like
Wake 7am
Nap 9.30 - 10.15am
Nap 1.15- 3pm
Bed asleep by 7pm

I wonder if he's getting OT at bedtime.

HTH