TBH, I think her PM nap is too long and goes too late in the day. At 3 my daughter was doing a 1-3 nap, sometimes 1-230. She is awake from 7 or 8 am until 1, which is 5 or 6 hours. Then she sleeps for at least 2 of the 3, only has 3.5-4 hours of A time before bed. This probably isn't enough time to get the energy out.
She also sounds like she is going through a phase where she wants your attention. She recognizes you are tired and don't have as much time for her (she probably wouldn't verbalize it that way, but she senses it). She is trying to do what she can to get your attention any way she can. Some things that might help:
1. Set a timer. "Mommy will cuddle with you for 20 minutes, then when the timer goes off mommy is going to her bed."
2. Try shorten her PM nap. 2 hours should be more than enough for a 3 year old. My bet is she just isn't tired enough for bed yet.
3. Give her some in room activities at bed time. My DD often reads books to herself if she isn't tired. I'll give her a time when the lights have to go off (say 830, she has a digital clock in her room) and she shuts the lights off and goes to bed pretty well by herself.
4. Make a good night chart. For every night that she goes to bed nicely she gets a sticker. After 7 stickers she gets a prize of some kind. This worked AMAZINGLY well for my DD when we took away her pacifiers at the age of 3. She got to choose an activity like Chuck E. Cheese after she completed her chart. Sometimes small gifts work well too like bubbles or chalk.
5. You can also say, "mommy is very tired too. She is going to go lay down in her bed, but we will come check on you at XXX time." Then be true to your word, just incase you have a clock watcher like mine :-)
Hopefully suggestions help. My DD really reacted well to the timer and the charts.
Hugs and wishes for a safe and happy pregnancy!
Holly
