Hey Anna
What you're doing is totally fine as you are just at the beginning. I think you can stay in the room with him for a bit longer. Over a period of a few days or a week start to try and take your hand away and just give some verbal assurances, shhing or softly say its nap time now, its nap time now...whatever works for you just keep it consistent. Then over a few more days, once he can settle with just verbal assurances (you may still need to touch him every so often, just go with what he needs but always keep in mind that you are trying to wean him of your presence) start to move further away from the cot until eventually all you need to do is stand at the door and eventually you can say nap time and leave the room. At that point you may have to do Walk in Walk out (WIWO) if he get hysterical, thats so he knows you are still there if he needs you. And you may need to keep doing PD.
i think if he is calling but not crying you should leave him. When.if he starts crying hard you can do WIWO with PD. Try not to pick him up the idea is that most of the settling is done in the cot. Obviously, if he gets overworked you have to pick him up...do what you feel is right.
I would also start to offer morning and afternoon snacks to his food intake. He's going to start to need more calories and hopefully this will help him sleep through the night. You can try bulking out his yoghurt or something with baby rice in the evening...
Its between 10 months at 18 months that LOs start o move towards 1 nap a day. I think perhaps at this point your should still aim for 2 naps until you are getting at least one long 2 hour or more nap in the middle of the day. You are going to have to play it by ear. But if you are still getting these short naps then hes going to need at least 2 or 3 of them...
He does not need to feed at night at this age...however, its up to you as to how many issues you take on at once. If it were me I only have the strength to deal with one thing at a time. So, have a think about your own energy levles. You may decide to just focus on getting him to become an independent sleeper before tackling nights or you may choose to do it all at the same time.
So, just 3 months ago we weaned our 12 month old son from feeding at night. He was down to one feed a night, eating lots of solids and having 3 BFs in the day - the night feed was a habit not a necessity. I could not do it myself as if I went in he would wonder why he couldn't feed as the breasts were right there in front of him and I worried that I would give in. We waited until DH had some time off...we had 4 days. The first night when DS woke DH went in a settled him, it took quite a while, the next night was better, then next better and so on. He did really well for 4 nights on the last two nights he just needed a hand on his back and was back to sleep within 5-10 mins. The night 5 and 6 DH was back at work so it was me going in. The first night it took me 2 hours!!! The next night it took me 20 mins...the next night he slept all the way through!!!
It can be done, it takes patience, and consistency.
You are doing so well, really really well...keep me posted.
xo
