Is this nap wind down OK? When should I change it? **GREAT UPDATE**

[J+M]

I have a 9 week old

For naps I swaddle, put on white noise, and hold him while I sway my body slowly from side to side.  As soon as his eyes start closing I put him down and his eyes usually pop open again and then he drifts off to sleep.

I used to try to pat/shh with him down already but it seemed to take so long and he would get so upset.  I think the pat was too much for him because then I just did shh and I started also rocking the bassinet.  That worked great for a bit and for getting him back to sleep between the jolts.

But then his cries would escalate anyway so I started picking him up again, getting him calm and drowsy, and then putting him back down drowsy.

It seems to work fairly quickly BUT I'm realizing that I'm getting him to wind down in my arms and not independently laying down with me there with him.

Should I go back to what I was doing before?  Should I wait until he is a little older first?

It seemed to work to get him past the 10 and 20 min jolts. I was even able to extend his 45 min naps to 90 min.  But now it seems that he's back to 45 min naps more days then not, vs the trend in the other direction we were starting to do, and i'm thinking it's because of me picking him up.  

I only pick him up if he cries escalate which they seem to do now unfortunately.  When the technique isn't working and their crying escalates isn't that when you pick them up to calm them down?  I'm not doing a PU/PD...just a PU if he's really beyond fussy and into full blown crying so that I can calm him down..then I continue to hold until he is drowsy before putting him back down again.


Of course a day filled with 90 min naps gives me a nice 3 hr EASY...but a day with short 45 min naps makes it around 2 hr or 2.5 hr if I do other things before feeding him to try and extend it.  It's just all over the place despite my efforts.

[J+M]

WOW. So length of the nap is not all that better BUT I tried something different and it worked great!

I decided to just see if he was getting upset because I was actually doing too much.

So I laid him on the bed on top of the swaddle and rubbed on his chest and arms and legs.  Like a relaxing massage but we were smiling at each other.  Then I swaddled him while he was happy.  Then I rubbed all over his chest in the swaddle and we were still smiling at each other.  I put him down in the bassinet and rubbed on his chest and smiled at him and he smiled back.  We did this for about 30 seconds and then I just stepped away and he kept looking around but he was OK.

In about 15 min he drifted to sleep all on his own! 

The nap was 55 min...a little longer that the 45 I was getting..but I know he can take a long nap since he's done it before so many times.  It'll come back around again.  The going to sleep part is the most important thing I think right now.

I tried it again for his follow up nap and it worked again! This time 58 min...so the same thing.

I hope this is IT because the end goal is to put them down fully awake and walk away with them able to drift off on their own..and that's what he's doing so I'm thrilled!  Fingers crossed it sticks! 

[J+M]

Another update for any interested moms...it's still working!

He is fussing, not really crying but just vocally upset.  But again..I can't do TOO MUCH.  I noticed that when I returned to rub his chest he just got more upset.  He didn't actually need me to come back, he really was needing his own space to wind down.  I left and within 60 seconds he was asleep.  Each nap has him fussing 5-10min and then he's asleep.  He has woken up fully, looking around, at the 20 and 30 and sometimes 45 min mark but each time he remains quiet and calm and drifts back to sleep in a minute or so on his own.

Oh, nap lengths have varied from 55 min to 1 hr 10 min.  So just slowly building up time...it'll get there.  All the right things are happening and I'm thrilled!

Stepping back a little and trusting in him to be able to do it on his own has really paid off!

[Roseii]

That's so great to read, well done you Sounds like his mantra cry possibly??
xxx

[J+M]

I think it is!

This last nap I think just ended...1 hr 20 min.  Yeah, he's getting it down!

I'm so proud of my little guy!

[Roseii]

be proud of you too Well done x

[J+M]

He went back down...just got up so actually TWO hours and 20 min! Wow! 

Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

[cbsmommy]

Just out of curiosity, what are your A times for your LO?  I have a 10 week old and she still seems to only last 1 hour - 1 hour 5 minutes.  It seems kind of short to me.  I thought by 12 weeks she should be able to handle 1 hr 30 min but not at this rate!!

[J+M]

I used to start the wind down at 1 hr 15 min and he would drift to sleep by 1 hr 30 min.  He's been super happy and awake so I tried pushing it back 15 min these past couple days and it seems to be working.  1 hour 30 min (or 20 min) he's down in his bassinet and he drifts off to sleep around 1 hour 45 min at the latest.

Seems a little long...BUT I am really focusing on giving him LESS stimulation while he is up and I think that is the difference.

He just lays in a new location where he can look at a mobile or something above him, maybe just sitting in the bouncy chair and looking around, then we go and I lay him on the bed with the sound machine on for a couple minutes and massage him before I even swaddle him so he is relaxed and content.  This seems to have made just as much of a difference as the A time. (I do also rub him and give him smiles throughout his A time on and off).

Now, we are going through a growth spurt I think because he's been nursing like CRAZY...so this is probably not going to be the norm BUT...this morning's nap was 2 hours and 25 min!

As far as your LO...maybe something is off at night?  I wonder if you post your EASY on the EASY board if any tweaking would help. 

He goes down at 8pm for the night but does wake around 12am-3am-5am and then 7am to eat. So we're still working on getting longer stretches at night.  I'm trying to nurse more in the later afternoon and early evening and it seemed to help for awhile but then his growth spurt put him back to wanting to eat more and more often.  I guess we'll have to wait and see how this week goes and how everything falls into place post growth spurt.

Anyway-I hope that helps!  Good Luck!  They do keep us guessing don't they?