Please help! 2 yo with sudden sleep problems and new baby 2 weeks away!

[mom2myMMS]

Please help!  My DS is 25 mo and is now having problems going to sleep.  We did move him into a toddler bed, which he loves, but it is now taking him 2-3 hours to fall asleep.  When he becomes OT he gets really fidgety and as an infant we would have to tuck his arms under ours during the bedtime routine to help him settle down otherwise his arms would flail and wake him more.  Even as a toddler when he becomes OT he gets really fidgety.  I don't know how to help him as I am assuming this is why it's taking him so long to fall asleep.

Previous routine: (2 weeks ago)
Wake:  8:00 - 8:30
Nap:  1:00 - 1:30...it would take 5-10 minutes for him to fall asleep
Wake:  3:30 - 4:00 (generally the nap was 2-3 hours)
Bed:  8:00...again, maybe 15 minutes to fall asleep

Total sleep time:  14ish hours

Now:
Wake:  7:30...wakes up every morning at exactly the same time.
Nap:  1:00 - 1:30...however he does not fall asleep until 3:30 - 4:00
Wake:  4:00...I've been waking him up at the same time because I don't want him sleeping too late which would effect bedtime.
Bed:  8:00...doesn't fall asleep until 10:00 (on a good night) - 11:00

Total sleep time:  8.5 - 9.5 hours

I know he is OT.  I've tried putting him down earlier for his nap and bedtime knowing he isn't going to fall asleep right away, but I don't feel I can put him down too much earlier otherwise the poor kid would do nothing but lay in bed.

Please help...I'm 38 weeks pregnant and want to have him back into a reasonable sleeping pattern before the next one arrives.  I'd LOVE to have it so he isn't OT, but at this point I'll take anything!

Thanks!

[sianie]

Hi there...

Did these issues start with the move to a toddler bed?

Is he teething at all? Any 2nd yr molars through yet?

Have you tried pulling his nap much earlier? If he's OT then it could be that you are missing his sleep window & him fighting going down is him getting his '2nd wind'. I would maybe try to have him asleep around midday & see if this makes a difference.

It's also normal for Lo's to feel unsettled before a new baby is born, so it could also be that this is causing some of the sleep issues (although sleep regression can also happen with an older sibling once a new baby arrives too).

[mom2myMMS]

The issues did start with the move to the toddler bed.  Previously he was sleeping in a travel tent bed...he learned to get out of his crib at 18 mo and around the same time we went on vacation and used this travel bed, well he slept wonderfully so he's been sleeping in that until now.  He has since learned how to get out of the travel bed so we figured if we were going to fight keeping him in a bed it would be the bbb and not the travel bed.

He has all his teeth...2nd molars came in about two months ago, which did cause a few problems at the time. 

So you think I should put him down around noon rather than 1:00? 

Also, I was looking through the various topics on the website and found one where someone posted that as long as the child is not crying to leave them be...let them play and the novelty will wear off.  My only concern with that is the OT child!    I don't want a cranky 2 yo while I'm trying to manage a newborn! 

We are attempting to use a light on a timer to tell him when he can get out of bed, which works 75% of the time...usually during the 2-3 hours before he falls asleep he is in his bed.  Finally, what should we do during the 2-3 hours that he is in there talking, singing, playing with his blankets, and occasionally getting out of the bed?  We've been laying outside his door (there is a baby gate up so he can't see us) watching him to make sure he stays in bed.  When he starts to get out we tell him to 'get back in bed, lay down and go to sleep'.  But it is eating up so much of my day (5-6 hours / day) which I think is contributing to my frustration with the situation. 

Thanks for your help!

[sianie]

Unfortunately, transitions to toddler beds can cause sleep issues but they are usually a phase & if you are consistent in how you deal with it then it should pass. The link below might be helpful:

http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=81192.0

TBH, if he's not crying then I would leave him to settle, it could be that you intervening is adding stimulation to the situation & therefore making it harder for him to settle. I would store away all toys etc that are in his room so that his bedroom is as empty as possible so there's nothing to distract him. I'm afraid that some OT building up as he goes through this transition is inevitable. You could try doing an EBT to help him catch-up.

[mom2myMMS]

Thanks for the advice! 

Last night we didn't sit outside his room or make any comments, but we would walk down the hall occasionally and he'd be hanging over the gate and when he'd see us coming run back to his bed and lay down.  We never said anything and he eventually fell asleep around the same time as he has been...10 pm...but now this morning he was up even earlier...6:45!  On one hand that's good, I think because the 7:30 habit is broken maybe, but it's even less sleep that he got.   

I did walk down the hall this morning and he had turned on the overhead light...I told him that we don't turn on the light that we wait until the light on his nightstand turns on before we get up.  How do we go about making sure he doesn't turn on the overhead light and in the BW book it states to nip getting out of bed in the bud before it becomes a habit...how do we do that if he runs to his bed every time we walk down the hall and we don't do any type of intervention?  I feel like we aren't really doing anything to ensure he doesn't get out of bed.  I guess I should be happy that he is content (at least thus far) to be in his room and doesn't cry until he falls asleep or when he wakes up in the morning?!    We'll make sure to take all his toys out of his room each night before bed.

We'll definitely continue with EBT...by how much though?  I was trying to put him down an hour earlier...maybe we'll do that for naptime too?! 

Please tell me it does get better!   

Thanks again!

[sianie]

Does he have a Gro-clock or something similar that would help him to understand time to go to bed/wake-up?

As his nights are short ATM then he will more than likely be more tired than usual in the AM so can earlier nap time would be a good idea. BT would depend on how long he naps for but as he is taking so long to settle at BT brining it forward as much as you can & doing a long wind-down might help.

[mom2myMMS]

Okay, so this afternoon's nap, he fell asleep within 45 minutes, which is a HUGE improvement, AND he did not get out of his bed...at least I don't think he did.   

We do use a timer on his light, which I'm assuming is similar to a grow-clock.  We have the timer set to turn on for wake up, turn off for naptime, turn on for wake up from naptime, and turn off for bedtime.  We've been working with him on what it means when the light goes on and off for quite a while (at least 4-5 months) knowing we would eventually be at this point.

I think you may be right...our intervention was an interference in his falling asleep and may have been contributing to the amount of time it took for him to finally fall asleep.  Either that or the exhaustion of the past 2 weeks has worn him down.    Doesn't matter to me, I'm just thrilled he's asleep!

Here's hoping tonight goes just as well!  I'll keep you posted.

Thanks a million for your help and advice!

[sianie]

Glad he had a better day! FX things keep improving! 

[mom2myMMS]

Well, apparently we were the problem, not my DS!    Since we have interfered less he has slept more.  Last night he was asleep by 9:30 pm and even though he did wake up early (before 7:00 am) he stayed in his bed until the light came on.  This afternoon he fell asleep within 30 minutes!  He is still OT, but I am hoping we are on the up-swing of getting back to a normal sleep routine.

Every time I have asked a question here I always get great advice and support!  Thank you for your help!

Now, I'm off to get DD on an EASY routine from the start!

[sianie]

Yay!