When previous methods all fail what do I do? Feeling useless..please help.

[Truly Blessed]

Hi Ladies,

I am running a few posts lately  . My question is simple really. DS is teething his 2nd year molars and having sleep trouble, particularly the nap. In the past I have used PD (initial sleep training) GW..WI/WO and when poorly staying in the nursery with occasional back rub etc. Now that Sam is 21 months non of these things seem to work anymore. The moment I step in and then leave he get so much more upset. So when he is crying IMYM I am at a loss  . This happened today at nap PD and he got worse with all my efforts. I instinctively know and have known if I leave him for 5 minutes he will calm down (usually    if not I go back in) he did start to calm today, after 3 minutes his cry was starting and stopping and he fell asleep around 10 minutes later.

But: I am riddled with guilt because it's the cry I have always immediately responded to in the past. What do I do if every other thing increases his upset and frustration. I feel helpless and useless when this happens to be honest. After everything I've learned I don't know how to deal with this 

He only napped for 37 minutes then woke up upset again 

Am I alone in this problem or do Toddlers all start to kick back when their personalities get stronger 

(X)

[Tweakster]

We APd through teeth, especially molars, and he still sleeps independently.  We did whatever it took to get him sleep at night and naps.  I do not ever regret responding when I knew he was teething and struggling and needed me.  PD is really quite stimulating, you'd be better off at this age to just stay by the crib and repeat your key phrase or if your presence is upsetting him too much, stand outside the door and let him know you are there.  Are you medicating?

What's his routine look like?

[ZacsMumme]

I am following along sammysmummy because we too have lots of sleep problems during teething, a lot like yours. Wendy, I am so happy to read your post!

We APd through teeth, especially molars, and he still sleeps independently.  We did whatever it took to get him sleep at night and naps.  I do not ever regret responding when I knew he was teething and struggling and needed me.  

This is totally what we are doing, I cant not respond IYKWIM. In the past (touch wood) z has always gone back to independent deep after, but now hes older I worry the chances of APing becoming a prop are greater.

[Truly Blessed]

Hi Ladies,

I don't have a problem with responding but the problem is whatever I do seems to make him worse  . My first instinct is to stay with him when he's going through something like teething and is so upset but today when I tried to stay and talk gently with him he started to bang his head off the cot through frustration at me being there and not getting him out of the cot...this is what I'm up against....that's just one example of how successfull past methods fail.

(X)

[Tweakster]

When I was faced with that, I took him out of the cot.  I held him, cuddled, rocked him to sleep, whatever I had to do.  He's in pain and not going to have much luck going off on his own in an OT state.

Finn often fought AP but it was the best I could offer.

[ZacsMumme]

Oh yes hun that is hard when they are beside themselves. We get that too and TBH I wing it! Usually Zac will go nuts in the cot without us holding him, but he is unhappy being held. I think it is their outlet for pain. I do find now he is older he prefers to be upright where he can rest his head on my shoulder. This helps calm him though the crying goes right in your ear Have you tried singing or humming a song he is familiar with and rubbing his back? This helps us.

That said, ATM I am BF to calm my boy when teething (not a good method)

[Truly Blessed]

Thanks again Ladies,

I guess I'm just despairing due to him being OT now due to short naps and some NW  . He is an Angel baby so he coped with the OT well but today's nap was 37 minutes and it really affected him. I guess I feel when I don't leave him to calm himself I can rest assured there'll be no nap unless I APOP in the car and I've been advised not to do that all the time. TBH that is the least stressfull way ATM but whilst I'm sitting in the car with him the housework refuses to do itself  . Not that that is the most important thing, it can just be frustrating.

I guess from now on I'll keep pulling out all the tricks and go for the car nap if he is too upset.

ZacsMumme I hope those nasty molars pop soon  .

(X)