I've had enough. I give up

[Aishi]

I don't want advice I'm just ranting. I've had enough.

I started st ds again for the third time at 2.5yo a month ago but the BT and nap antics have been going on for over a year....it's more of a problem now because it means leaving 10 mo dd to amuse herself and sometimes cry for up to an hour and I've had enough of it.

I'm sick of tweaking his routine, of figuring out right a times and nap lengths, of trying to squeeze in EBT around dds routine and not to mention the often hours long nws and ews. Icing on the cake was too late a BT yesterday leading to several nws and a 4.30 start. He refused his nap after 6h a, 7h a and after 2 hrs I gave up cos dd woke from nap. The earliest BT I could do was 6 which typically coincided with dds BT since she's on one nap and I wasn't going to let her CIO. ao i just read him a story quick kiss and cuddle abd yold him it was sleepy time-he has just gone to sleep after 10 mins of monster hysterics and drama.

But I'm done. I'm not running myself ragged trying to get him to nap and sleep peacefully at the expense of dd and my sanity. I've done what I can to teach him independant sleep without leaving him to CIO and I know he can do it. Yet I still get antics at all sleep times on all but a few occasions. I'm the worst mother for giving up but im not cut out to do the BW way with him and tbh I don't have the patience or strength for it anymore. In fact I'm really really angry with him which makes me feel even worse but I know he's too stubborn for this to work and im at the end of my tether!! Today has been the worst day ever!!

[becj86]

Huge hugs, Aishi

[mycatmonet]

hugs aishi. I can't imagine how hard 2 LOs would be when there are sleep dramas. You WILL get through it!!! Xx

[ZacsMumme]

Hugs honey
I know your having a rant and prob don't want thoughts but is it possible a fixed routine could work better to reset his clock...push through the OT YK?

[*Becky*]

many hugs xx

[*happy*]

So many hugs hun.x

[Aishi]

Thanks ladies for the unwavering support and hugs. Rant over

Sara- were pretty much on a set routine as I can manage. He needs at least 7h a before nap and only 4.-4.5 h a to BT depending on nap length or we get nw and EW

However I know what the problem is- its because I'm too soft during nws. I go in at every demand in hope hell get used to it and he just gets more demanding! Put my blanket on (he knows how to) give me water, kiss and cuddle, don't want bear on bed, open gate etc and I give in so he doesn't get more OT

So last night I determined not to go in unless he was genuinely distressed..

BT was 6.15
Nw 9.15-10.15 I just reassured from my room
Nw 1.40-50 reassured from my room
EW 5.15 went in after gro clock came on at 6.

I know I said no advice but now that rants over is this ok to do. Ive been so scared of it turning into cc that I haven't been consistent with only going in If he needs me. So what I'm asking is this isn't cc is it?

Thanks for listening x x

[ZacsMumme]

I don't think so, especially if your reassuring from your room. At BT I would also explain what your going to do if he wakes. Ie mummy is here if you need her but will help you back to sleep from her bed if she can do. Or something like that maybe ?
If he starts to scream/cry in an I need you way, it's prob best to go in and maybe do WI/WO but you know him best Hun