What happens when you just leave him to it? Would he eat with his hands or is it just cutlery he won't use?
If he's having an off day, he'll cry and fuss and insist until I feed him
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He will happily feed himself angel delight (his favourite dessert) and will eat any sort of cake or biscuit with his fingers any time it is offered. He will sometimes happily spoon feed himself (if he's hungry) porridge, yoghurt, or even scrambled egg. He will use his fork about half the time with fish fingers or other forkable foods he likes. Veg he tends to grab with his hands, even really small bits
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He's just really inconsistant... but then he is a toddler
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I have tried being a bit slow which sometimes encourages him to feed himself, as he realises he'll get it quicker if he doesn't wait for Mama to do it
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This only works if he's hungry or really wants the food though!
I have to spoon protein into him sometimes otherwise he would not get enough, and he's a growing boy. He put on half a kilo in weight and 2cm height over the last 2 months (he's just under the 50th centile for both) having had a bit of a plateau just after his 2nd birthday. He's never been particularly interested in food and didn't eat much until he was over 2yo, as he's MPI and had silent reflux, so he equated eating with pain when he was younger
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Now he's outgrown the reflux and is able to tolerate small amounts of dairy, so he's got more food options
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My mum says I was feeding myself well before I was 2yo, but I think that like with everything else, every child is different!