Is this the 2-1 transition?

[Gussycat5]

This is my first post. Just looking for some advice for my 12 month old daughter and her napping problems. She started being funny with naps around 9 months old (happened around the same time as standing up and learning to walk, she would spend the whole time practicing in her crib instead of napping). She would have the odd day here or there where she would refuse either her morning or afternoon nap. It has just gotten consistently worse and worse and now has been refusing the afternoon nap for the past month. She wakes up between 7-7:30am and seems tired and ready for her morning nap after 1.5 hours of awake time. She usually gets hyper and starts falling over when walking. Even though she seems very tired it can still take her 30 minutes to fall asleep. Once asleep She will nap 1.5-2 hours. I usually try putting her down for her afternoon nap after 2.5 hours of awake time, but she will not sleep. By dinnertime she is exhausted and I usually aim for an early bedtime (6pm). She will sleep all night with only the odd wake up (she settles on her own in a few minutes).

I keep reading that 15 to 18 months is when the transition from 2 to 1 naps happens, but could this be what is happening? She really seems to need the morning nap still.

One other thing, she also has a habit of pooping in the afternoon and then won't nap because of that.

Any advice would be much appreciated! I'm going crazy trying to figure out what to do!

[katie80]

Hi and welcome to BW!

Yes, for sure that is the beginning of the 2-1 transition!  It usually starts around 10-12mo (sounds like it was about 9mo for you) and can last for a few months, with most LOs fully moving to one nap between 12-18mo.  Have a read through this... 10 to 12 mth old Sleep Gone Wonky, and the 2 - 1 Nap Switch

It sounds like what is happening for you is that she is tacking on to her night sleep with that first nap of the day, because it's happening so soon after she wakes up.  And she's probably tired early, because she hadn't napped the afternoon before.  It's a vicious cycle.  You have a couple options in terms of changing that and they are both in the link above. You need to start making the morning nap later regardless.  The average A for a 12mo old is 3.5-4.5hr.  I'd try to keep her awake 15-20 more min every few days.  Then, you can let her sleep her 1.5-2hr and do another nap 3.5-4hr later.  This nap only needs to be a CN at this point, so 30-45min.  You will then be able to get to a more decent BT, and she should start waking more rested in the morning so you can continue to move the morning nap later until it becomes more of a mid-day nap and then you're at one nap.  How does that sound?

One other thing, she also has a habit of pooping in the afternoon and then won't nap because of that.

This happened often with my DD.  I'm wondering, if you're trying to put her down only 2.5hr after her morning nap, it must be somewhat close to lunch time.  I had to give my DD at least 15-30min after lunch to move around and poop before putting her down for a nap.  I think if you work on a new routine, that should help the problem a bit.

[Gussycat5]

Hi,

Thank you so much for the reply!! I feel a bit crazy trying to work out her napping so it really helps having some suggestions to try.

Since I posted she has been going down for her morning nap closer to 10am. I've been waking her from this nap after an hour to try to preserve the afternoon nap, but no success. Should I just let her sleep as long as she wants for the morning nap? Even if it's 1.5-2 hours. And then say if she wakes at noon I should try putting her down around 3:30pm for a catnap? Would I then wake her from this catnap to preserve bedtime? I've also been waking her by 7:30am each morning (sometimes she wakes on her own), is this okay to do?

Sorry for all the questions! I just feel lost as to what to do and I know she is not getting proper sleep in the day and it stresses me out seeing her with red eyes and in a cranky mood.

Thanks again!!

[katie80]

You can really go either way with the nap.  Would you like her to do the longer nap in the morning or the longer nap in the afternoon?  If you want the longer one in the afternoon, you likely need to cut the morning one a bit shorter (30-45min) rather than 1hr.  If you keep the morning one longer, you want to let her sleep at least 1.5hr (a full two sleep cycles), possibly 2hr.  But, if you continue to have trouble getting an afternoon nap (just a catnap at this point and yes, you will wake her), you might need to cap the morning at 1.5hr.  You'll just have to try a couple different things.  Waking her by 7:30am is just fine.

Here are a couple options...

Long am nap:
Wake 7:30am
Nap 1 10:30-12:30 (eventually this will get pushed to 11/11:30/12pm)
Nap 2 4/4:30-4:45/5:15
BT 7:30/8pm

Long pm nap:
Wake 7:30am
Nap 1 10:30-11:15
Nap 2 2-4pm
BT 8pm

If you continue with the longer morning nap, is there a way you can AP the CN in the afternoon, just to get her used to sleeping at that point again?  Maybe a long walk with her in the stroller or a car ride to run some errands?

[Gussycat5]

Thank you for the 2 options to try. I think I will try putting her down later in the morning and try the long morning nap. She really hasn't been doing well with me waking her from the morning nap. Then I find I have a cranky girl after waking her and then a cranky girl at the end of the day. If I let her sleep and she doesn't take an afternoon nap at least I only have a cranky girl at the end of the day.

I will try to get a catnap. Probably in the car would expect best, but she does seem to really fight sleep. She just doesn't want to miss anything!

Thank you again for the help! You don't know how much I appreciate it!!

[katie80]

Your welcome!  If you are really having trouble with the CN, then at least gradually moving the main nap to the middle of the day will help even it out and get her to a more reasonable bedtime with less crankiness.

Keep us posted!

[Gussycat5]

Hi again,

Just wanted to post how today went.

Awake at 7:15am
In crib for nap at 10am - she was starting to cry and be fussy
Nap 10:45am to 12:10pm - unfortunately had to wake her as we had to go somewhere
On the drive back home she was yawning, but refused to fall asleep during the 45 minute drive - got home and put in crib at 4pm - did not sleep, just babbling to herself and finally just standing up - had pooped when I ended the nap
In bed at 6:25pm and asleep by 6:40pm

I know it was just the one day and I need to give things a few days, but what do you think about her taking 45 minutes to fall asleep for her nap? She does often take 30 minutes and sometimes up to an hour. She never cries and just rolls around on her face babbling to herself. Could this just be normal for her to take a long time to fall asleep or is she just not ready to sleep?

I will see how tomorrow goes, but I do have a feeling that a late afternoon catnap may be a fight. She just doesn't seem to fall asleep in the car or stroller anymore. I guess I'm wondering if I will just need to go with 1 nap mid day and probably dealing with some crankiness at the end of the day until she gets older and can tolerate the longer awake times? I hate this one nap is not enough, but two naps is too many phase!

Thanks again for the help and for listening to me vent!!

[katie80]

I know it was just the one day and I need to give things a few days, but what do you think about her taking 45 minutes to fall asleep for her nap? She does often take 30 minutes and sometimes up to an hour. She never cries and just rolls around on her face babbling to herself. Could this just be normal for her to take a long time to fall asleep or is she just not ready to sleep?

I think she's not ready to sleep yet. Is she starting to be fussy because she's bored or needs a change of activity? She could be acting like that out of habit too, if she's used to going down then. Most 12mo olds are doing 3.5-4.5hr A time and she was down at 2h45min. She fell asleep at 3.5hr and likely would have slept well. I'd start keeping her up til 3.5hr A, do your wind down and aim to have her asleep around 3h45-4h A. If you think the pm nap is always going to be tough to get, you need to start making that morning nap later and later.

As for the CN, I think the drive home happened too early today. If she slept until 12:10 and you started driving home around 3-3:15, that's only 3hr A again. She wasn't quite tired enough to sleep. And by the time you did get home, she had 'rested' a bit in the car seat and then pooped, so the CN was a bust.

It is a hard place to be in... stuck between 2 and 1 nap. But, keep working at it. And once you get the one nap to mid day, it should be smoother sailing for awhile. (((Hugs)))

[Gussycat5]

Just posting with how yesterday went just to get some input.

Woke her at 7:30am
Nap 10:45am to 12:30pm - had pooped so hard to know if she would have gone longer
Tried for a catnap at 3:45pm, but no success
Bedtime at 6:30pm - did not fall asleep until 8pm - wasn't fussing until about 7:30pm and then she cried out every so often and it was the "I'm tired, but can't figure out how to go to sleep" cry

Let her wake up on her own this morning which was at 7:35am

So I probably should have tried for the catnap a bit later, but her eyes were red and she kept rubbing them so I was worried I'd miss the sleep Window. She seems ready for the morning nap after 3 hours and I know you said more like 3.5 hours, but I didn't want to push her too much so soon especially since she seems to start crying around 2 hours of awake time. I just put her down for her morning nap at the same time as yesterday (10:30am) and she seems asleep at around the same time (10:45am). She hasn't been falling asleep this quickly in ages so it seems promising.

The big problem was taking 1.5 hours to fall asleep last night. I think it was because she was overtired. We have a video monitor so I could see her rolling around and just couldn't seem to settle. Should I put her to bed even earlier then 6:30pm? She has done 13 hours nights in the past, but I'm wondering if she will with an almost 2 hour nap mid day? She would do a 13 hour night when I started trying to cap the morning nap to get an afternoon nap (which didn't work). I just didn't want her to start waking earlier and earlier everyday.

Any thoughts?

[katie80]

So I probably should have tried for the catnap a bit later, but her eyes were red and she kept rubbing them so I was worried I'd miss the sleep Window.

Yes, I would've tried more like 4:15-4:30pm for the CN.  She doesn't have much A time in the morning, so after a long nap, she's going to need more in the afternoon. 

She seems ready for the morning nap after 3 hours and I know you said more like 3.5 hours, but I didn't want to push her too much so soon especially since she seems to start crying around 2 hours of awake time. I just put her down for her morning nap at the same time as yesterday (10:30am) and she seems asleep at around the same time (10:45am). She hasn't been falling asleep this quickly in ages so it seems promising.

Yeah, push the A time longer by 15-20min every few days to get to 3.5, then eventually 4hr.  If you go too quick, she will probably get OT, but it does need to be longer to even out the day.  The reason she's acting so tired in the morning is because she's not getting that afternoon nap, so is still tired even though she gets a long night.  The day is just off, iyswim.

Should I put her to bed even earlier then 6:30pm? She has done 13 hours nights in the past, but I'm wondering if she will with an almost 2 hour nap mid day?

But, the nap isn't at mid-day yet.  It's ending mid-day and then she's staying awake 6ish hr until BT.  That's a really long A time and why she's still so tired in the morning.  I think she was OT last night, and I would shoot to have her asleep by 6:30 at the latest, just like you did.  14-15hr total sleep is pretty average still for her age, so I think she's capable of doing a long night while you're working on moving the nap.  If she doesn't, then we'll worry about that when it happens and she might even be easier to get a CN out of.